It had been 36 years since I had last seen Leeteuk. And today, on the 3rd of June, 2053, I will see him one last time. It had been 41 years since we had last recorded together as Super Junior, even though we'd never been the same Super Junior since Hangeng's departure. The last thing we ever recorded you ask? Our last music video, Opera, perhaps you still remember it? If we had known it was out last one, we probably would have enjoyed it a lot more. I still remember it vividly, like the whole experience happened only last week. There was a light hanging in the far left of the main stage, causing our manager to get extremely upset and become close to a mental breakdown. We members, were sulking and groaning, having being woken by alarms a a time that seemed far too early. There was some excitement in the air, for one particular reason. Not our anticipated video, but the return of our hyung, Kangin. He was returning home to us in 4 weeks and 5 days. I had been crossing the days off in the morning since the start of the new year. I remember this because I had been crossing them off with a different colour every week - that particular week had been blue. But there was also some sadness too, an empty feeling that all the members were attempting to block out. There were two reasons for this. The first being that this would be our second music video without Kim Heechul, which was strange to us back then. He was the glue that held us in the filming process, filling the spare time with jokes and teasing. Although we still joked, Kim's familiar cackle was something that we deeply missed. The second reason? It marked the last time Leeteuk would record with us until 2014, which terrified us. His time for the army service had arrived, and we were all miserable. He was the single parent of our mismatched group. He sorted our differences, made the rules, he created the bonds between us, and without his support and guidance, we all silently worried we would break. With all these emotions running sky high, it's no wonder we were tired and anxious to get the filming over. We practised unenthusiastically, doing the bare minimum of movement until it was actually required. When I look back on that day, I remember Leeteuk constantly looking upset and hiding his tears. It wasn't that I didn't care about him, but at the time, I didn't think much of it. I had my own things to fret about, secrets that had to be hidden, thoughts that had to be concealed. But now, looking back, I think he knew. He knew what would happen to us after this filming, after he left. But he would never admit it aloud, he wasn't conceited enough for that. Heechul perhaps, but not Leeteuk. The director of our final video gave us a 5 minute warning to start filming, and we members made our way to our stage, all but two of us. Yesung and I.
Yesung was a beautiful man back then, I assume he still is now. And we were in love. The kind that gave you butterflies when you thought about them and made you feel dizzy. We had shared a room, which is where our relationship started, often having wild nights of lustful passion. No. That was a lie. I shouldn't lie, you might as well know the full truth. On the occasions we were intimate, they were soft, gentle times. Yesung was always gentle with me, he always said "Being gentle was the only way to make love to someone like you". I never understood what he meant, why he had saw me as such a fragile being. I still don't understand. I wish I had asked him when I had the chance. Before we headed to the stage with the others, Yesung and I held hands, concealing them from the others with a carefully placed bag. "Good luck." He had smiled at me, causing me some embarrassment, I had a record for doing the wrong moves at the wrong time, my hyungs had teased me for years, but I did;n't mind. perhaps, if I had known the band's fate, I would have tried even harder with the routine. "You too." I replied pointlessly. Yesung was an extremely under appreciated dancer, and could have performed the routine backwards, if you had asked him. (Heechul had proved this theory as a bet with Hangeng when we had recorded the video for "Sorry Sorry". Heechul won his bet against Hangeng, but I don't know what his prize was. But after Hangeng's leaving, we didn't speak of it again.) We made our way to the stage, and I painfully dropped Yesung's hand, as to not arouse suspicion. We got into the correct places, I took my place next to Eunhyuk-oppa, and we painted a smile on our face. We each had a fake smile stained to our faces, whatever worried we had, were covered up. We couldn't show any feeling that wasn't happiness. Our fans would notice and management refused to film us unless we looked ecstatic all the time.
We returned home at 11:36pm, having being at the filming studio for over 17 hours - give or take a few minutes - I went straight to the bedroom Yesung and I shared, hoping for some intimacy. He never came to bed that night, I fell asleep under his covers, . As I discovered later, he had fallen asleep on the living room sofa, still in his training clothes. That day, our manager gave us a day off, a rare treat. I got my desired intimacy later that day, telling the other members we were deeply engrossed in computer games. After thoroughly tiring Yesung out, I got redressed and went downstairs to the kitchen, while he rested. I poured Yesung his strawberry water with a little lime juice in it, the way I knew he liked it. As I carefully left the kitchen carrying Yesung's drink and my glass or water, I heard two low voices whispering in the dinner room. "I'm relying on you Siwon, to take care of my boys when I'm gone." Leeteuk cried softly to Siwon, who was nodding with an unusually serious look on his face. "I will oppa." Was all Siwon could manage before wiping his tears away, Leeteuk put his arm around Siwon, tears in his eyes also. I was unsure of what to do. Go in and comfort the people I respected, or leave them in their tears, entwined in the arms of the other. I decided to leave them, I doubted they wanted me to see them so emotional, when they were normally so strong with their feelings. I slipped upstairs, and fell into the arms of my love, letting my tears flow, while he held me tightly, repeatedly telling me he loved me.
 

(I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE FIRST PART OF MY STORY. I DO HAVE MORE BUT I THOUGHT I'D POST IT FIRST, AND IF PEOPLE WANT TO CONTINUE READING, I'LL PUT THE OTHER HALF UP. IF NOT, IT'LL JUST SIT LIKE THIS UNTIL THE END OF TIME:D)