Chaeyoungs pov

I wake up to an empty bed, my hand moves around the bed trying to find the unnie I fell asleep with. But not surprisingly she's gone. I sigh, as always I feel as if when I finally make progress with her she pulls away and leaves me here wondering if maybe it was all in my head. 

I decide to get up and see if she's just having breakfast, but once I walk out its just Lisa and jisoo on the table with what looks like take out. 

"Finally you're awake" Lisa says munching her food hungrily. Jisoo pats the seat next to her while dishing out whatever they Brought, 
on a plate for me. 

"No Jennie today?" jisoo just shakes her head, I don't ask anyone questions no longer surprised by the absence of her. 

"What times our flight tonight" I ask jisoo who usually knows what we have to do. 

"Our flight leaves at 10pm tonight, but well be leaving here at 7pm so we need to start packing our things soon" 

"I'm excited to go home" I say, already wanting to leave this place. Dont get me wrong it was a nice trip but I miss home, I miss our dorm and I miss not having to interact with so many people. 

.......................

I'm in my room packing my things, now being alone I start to think of all the events that have happened during this trip. The main focus being on Jennie, why have I always been so infatuated with her? I mean she has always been an idol to me, but I've had this need to get closer to her and she's so pretty and talented how could I not want to be. But than jisoo is pretty and talented and so is Lisa but they don't make my heart pound or make me want to impress them. 

Do I, no I can't. I stop what I'm doing and start to think. Is this, is this me having a crush on her. Since day 1 she's always had my attention, I always want to be around her and close to her, I'm extremely attracted to her. 

If I felt these things for a man I would instantly think that I like them, does this mean I like her? AND THE KISS? , no I can not like her like that. But as much as I want to deny it I can't, everything makes sense now, why I get jealous when her and Lisa are close, why I hate all the guys she goes out with and mostly why I want her to want me. H-how did I not see it sooner. 

Have I always felt this way. Does this mean i'm a lesbian, no I've liked guys before but if I compare them to jennie no doubt I would have picked her over all of them. And then when I was in Australia and I had that girl crush on Vanessa, holy . I'm 22 and only now just realised that maybe I might like women as well and not just any woman but jennie. I get up and fast walk to the kitchen because I need some water or something to distract me. I quietly pour me a glass of water when I hear voices talking hushly. It's just jisoo and jennie so I don't pay much attention until I hear my name. 

"Stop playing with Rosie" jisoo says quietly, I can only hear them because her rooms right next to the kitchen and the door is slightly open.

"Ugh stop being annoying, im not doing anything" jennie replies, by now I've left my drink on the bench and slowly moved towards the door to hear better. 

"Don't play stupid with me, you know how she feels about you." when I hear that I freeze. 

"It's cute to see her like that, im not doing anything bad" jennie says nonchalantly. 

"Jennie im being serious, it was funny at the start to see her all jealous but now you're taking it too far." 

"Unnie, just stay out of it" 

"No, I don't want you to hurt her. She likes you jennie, I don't know if she's realised it herself but you obviously don't have feelings for her so why are you toying with her emotions." 

"I'm doing this for her, I'm sure she likes it." 

" You're only hurting her, from now on none of this fake flirting or giving her extra attention just to " 

"I'm not teasing her, I'm just being a good friend" 

"are you stupid, you're leading her on!" jisoo yells the last part. I'm clutching onto to my shirt by each word I hear. 

"I'm not doing anything but being a supportive unnie"

"Oh my god, jennie you know one of these days she's not going to put up with your "' 

"Please that girls been in love with me the moment we've met, there's no way anytime soon she'll stop" 

"Do you hear yourself, she's our member and our sister. You are hurting her, if you care about her at all you'll stop whatever game you're playing." 

"Stop being dramatic" jennie says, by now tears have started too well in my eyes. So im a game huh. 

"This ends tonight, she's our Rosie so stop this that you're doing. She came home upset yesterday and im guessing it was because of you, I let you sleep in that room to fix things so did you ?" 

"yesterday was a misunderstanding, me and her a good now" 

"It better be, I'm your best friend Jennie I love you but I love pasta just as much so if you hurt her I won't forgive you" 

"No ones getting hurt, if it makes you feel better ill stop flirting or whatever you think it is I do. I care about her too"

"Good, just be her unnie."

I don't stick around to hear the rest of their conversation, I shut my door and in a trance go back to what I was doing. 

After just realising my own feelings I hear that, Jennie's not acting like the person who looked after me when we were trainees. 

Was any of it real? all our shared moments where it was just me and her, the late night chats, the long nights she helped me when we were trainees, was any of it truly because she cared about me or was I just a thing to play with because she knew how I felt. I laugh bitterly not even bothering to wipe the tears that are now welling up. The push and pull game she's been doing to me wasn't just in my head. Is the person I thought I knew even truly her. 

"Pasta we're leaving soon" jisoo says outside of the door. I quickly wipe my tears and finish the last of my packing, before I leave the room I wash my face in cold water hiding any evidence I was ever crying. 

I walk out and all of our managers are here to get our luggage and to make sure we're all on track. I move on autopilot doing as told, to my luck because of the rush I don't have a chance to see or talk to jennie. I don't want to either, not after everything I heard. I'm not angry, just a little sad but what can I do. 

"Okay, everythings packed lets head out everyone" 

Lisa comes and hooks her arm with my own, a happy smile on her face. 

"Chae we're finally going home" she says excitedly. 

"I can't wait" I reply, I need to act fine no matter what. 

All I want to do is get away from everyone here, we have a long flight ahead of us but once I'm back I can leave. 

I pull out my phone and text the only person I trust right now. 

To Hyeri: Unnie, we're coming back today and i'm just heading to the airport now. Could I stay at your house tonight please. 

It's 7pm now so she should be awake in Korea. I put my phone away and go to the van thats waiting for us. I see Jennie looking at me I look away blankly and choose the seat thats empty while pulling Lisa with me. 

"Is chipmunk clingy today" Lisa teases, I shove her lightly while smiling. 

"You wish" I reply quietly before leaning my head on her shoulder to rest. 

From Hyeri: Of course, you know my code and are you okay?

To Hyeri: I'll tell you later, see you soon 

From Hyeri: Alright have a safe flight. Love you. 

To Hyeri: Love you 

................................

We just landed, I managed to sleep the entire 14 hour flight. Luckily the airports not packed since no one knows we're arriving back. We move quickly so we don't attract attention. 

"Do we need to go to the company today" Lisa ask. 

"No everyones tired, we'll head home so you can all rest" the girls sigh in relief. 

"Could you drop me off to hyeri unnie's oppa, if you can't its okay" I ask a little anxious knowing the girls can hear me. 

"Hyeri?" 

"Yeah" 

"No problem, I'll drop the girls off first" he says kindly, I move back to my seat and don't miss the look on Jennies face. 

"Why are you staying there" Jennie ask, probably the first words she's said to me. 

"I miss her" She doesn't reply so I put my headphones on and look out the window and admire the city I now call my home. 

We pull up to our shared dorm I nudge Lisa awake, she looks exhausted I think her not sleeping on the planes finally adding up. 

"Bye chipmunk" she says half asleep. 

"Bye pasta" she says kissing my cheek. Then lastly Jennie, I nervously look at her but she has a blank look on her face.

"Stay home" she says pouting, the expression from before wiped. Usually I would cave and listen but not anymore.

"Sorry Unnie, I'm staying with Hyeri. I'll see you later" I say trying to muster up a smile, but thats harder than it looks. The look on her face is back to the one before, blank and emotionless. 

"Bye chae" she says without looking at me then leaves. Apart of me wants to run outside of this van and follow her but for things to change I'm no longer going to be the chaeyoung that follows her everywhere. I close my eyes and try to relax myself, it needs to be like this , I'm not ready to confront her right now and I don't think its needed now I know the truth. 

Why did I have to like jennie Kim. 

 

..................

#Chaennie