Grammer not checked xoxo)

"Where are we going" I say shyly as Irene leads me through the slimming crowd of the corridor. 

She turns to face me with a huge smile, as if any of this is a casual Tuesday. 

"Wherever you want chaeyoung" I furrow my brows but don't question her. 

"I've messaged one of my managers to take us separately to my house" to her house I think slightly blushing. 

"Don't be a et chaeyoungieeee" she teases as if reading my thoughts. 

"I'll just get my car but you can stay with me anytime you want" She says with a cheeky wink. Never in my life did I think irene would wink at me, her genuine playfulness is really helping me right now. 

"Wait!, unnie can we go the other way" I say panicked only just realising well be going past where the girls are. 

"Hey, it will be fine I've got you" she says warmly now pulling out her hand for me to take. I hesitantly look at her and to the girls I can now see. But when she looks at me like how could I not trust her. 

"Okay" and with that we move. My hearts pounding as we get closer, but Irene just holds my hand tighter. 

from what it looks like the girls are around the door of our dressing room, they all look distressed except Lisa she just looks confused. Then I see her, the girl I'm trying to avoid hand in her hair a habit she does when she's nervous. As always she manages to catch my eyes, she pauses her movements with wide eyes, her look turns to a glare the closer we get. I match her energy not wanting to back down my own anger seeping out towards her. 

Before we can reach them Jennies marching her way towards us her stare never leaving me. 

"Chaeyoung, why the hell have you not been answering my calls" 

"Oh whoops I think my phone was on silent mode. Unnie" The disbelief on her face right now is so apparent. I see her take a deep breath trying to calm herself down. 

"Rosie, can you just come back to the dorms and let's talk" she says softer than before, almost pleading a part of me wants to go but i won't not after everything. If we do talk it will be on my terms. 

"Jennie not right now" I say tiredly. I can see her jaw clench and her fist start to tighten and I know its taking everything in her not to explode. Then I notice her eyes move to the hand holding my own, as if just realising were not alone. 

"Joo-hyun, could you just give me and chaeyoung a moment." Before irene says anything I cut in.

"Theres no need, Jennie ill talk to you another time but right now I can't" I reply in a soft tone. She looks frustrated her eyes are boring into my own, behind her angry eyes all I see is sorrow. She is an enigma, I know she's upset but than why do her actions not add up. 

"Rosie, just this time listen to me. Please just stay with me" this irks me because when have I not? 

"Why does it have to be me? why do I have to always be the one who has to listen to you explain why you chose to do things that hurt me? I'm telling you right now I need space, but as always I have to listen to you and not do what I need! Listen to me now, I'm going and I'll talk to you when I'm ready and that's that. Bye Jennie." I leave with Irene still holding my Hand, Jisoo and Lisa are looking at me shocked but I ignore them both, not today. 

"Well that was something" Irene says amused. I fake glare at her, my hearts still pounding from that conversation with Jennie. I can't believe I said that, I'm starting to think that maybe I shouldn't have spoken to her like that. Nah it, its about time. 

"are you okay" she says seriously this time. I look at her and think that for the first time since this whole Jennie thing has been going on that maybe I will. 

"I will be, things are just complicated right now" 

"I get it, come I won't take long" and with that I follow her. 

..............................

 

"Do your members not mind you being gone" I ask Irene curiously, she is the leader and I'm sure after a big night like this they'd wanna be together. 

"I'm sort of in the same position as you with one of my members, I think right now me being around her isn't what she needs" she says as we make our way into her building. 

I don't know much about Irene but she doesn't seem like the type of person I would want to not be around. I don't ask who because I don't want to intrude. 

"Well I guess its kind of perfect we met tonight than" I say trying to lighten the mood. 

She just gives me a bright smile opening her door. 

As we walk in her apartments just as expected, its tidy and very minimal but not to the point it looks like she's not trying. It's perfect really, I gaze around and what surprises me is there are so many photos of her family and members even one of Jennie and her. I don't look at that photo for to long. 

"Are you hungry" she ask walking to the kitchen. 

"Um not really unnie" I say nervously, now that I'm not having a breakdown Its starting to dawn on me who I'm with right now. 

"You can call me Joo-hyun if you like" She says cutely moving around the kitchen. 

"uh sure unnie I mean Joo-hyun" she just giggles, I move to her curiously to see what she's doing. 

"I'll order us some delivery just in case we get hungry?" 

"Thank you" 

"how about a drink while we wait." 

"Sure" 

"Beer, soju? vodka which would you like" when she said drink I didn't expect alcohol. 

"um do you have wine" I ask shyly. 

"Of course I do, I'll get us some glasses" 

I sit on her chair by the bench and just watch her curiously, she intrigues me from what I have seen shes nothing like I thought, she surprises me every time. 

"Joo-hyun I don't think that Jennies going to be happy you're here with me" She silently hands me the glass and takes a sip of her own. 

" hmm maybe, she's already blowing up my phone but she'll get over it" I wouldn't be so sure about that I think to myself. 

"Do you want to talk about it" she ask leaning on the bench. I contemplate whether I should or not tell her. I wonder how much she knows. 

"Has Jennie said anything to you" I choose to say instead. 

"I know that whenever anything involves you Jennie acts stupidly." 

"You could say that." I sigh and take a longer sip of my drink. 

" It's complicated, I don't know who I am to her. Somedays I'm her best friend somedays im her member and somedays I think that no one loves me as much as her. But then there's times where I feel as if I'm nothing to her she does things that hurt me so much and she knows they would and still chooses to do it. I'm just tired I guess, and tonight was the last straw. I don't understand her anymore and I think thats what hurts the most" As the words leave my mouth everything sinks in, I don't know her anymore or ever. 

"Chaeyoung" she says now moving to where I'm sitting, she moves in between my legs and pulls me in for a hug that takes me by surprise but I lean into it not realising how much I needed someones support right now. 

"I can't speak for her but I know you mean a lot to her, but from what I've heard it hasn't been easy. She's an enigma that girl, always in her own head but you don't deserve to be treated like that no matter what's going on. I'm not sure if it helps but I'll be here for you whenever you need." I hold her tighter. 

"It does help, thank you." She pulls away and looks at me warmly. 

"I'm glad" 

"Can I ask why you're doing this for me" I ask still perplexded by the fact I'm here right now. 

"I like being around you and you intrigue me" she says so easily. 

"Don't act surprised, i don't think you realise the effect you have on people" she says cooly moving away from me while she drinks her drink. 

"I- uh, thank you" I say shyly. 

"Cute" god of course I blushed when she says that. 

"You said you were going through the same thing as me, can I ask what happened" her eyes turn blank when I say that. Even though I can tell she's upset about whatever happened she sends me a smile. 

"it's Seung-wan, we've had issues for a while. I've hurt her a lot, being the leader comes with responsibility and I have to be the bad guy. Something came up and It reminded her of what I've done, she'll never say it to my face but she's upset and we've made up but being reminded hurts her so I left her alone. I think thats what she needs. " i take her in and her words and I can see how hurt she really is, and I didn't consider her being a leader might actually hurt her members. 

"You did what you had too, whatever happened wasn't what you wanted but what you had to do. Don't be too hard on yourself, you are doing your best as leader and she should understand that you have to do things that you don't want to." I say pulling her hand in, I think back to my own group and who takes on that role,we don't have an official leader but if we did it would be Jennie. She talks to the company for us and pushes for what we want, if anyones our leader its her. 

"thank you for saying that but I should have fought more, seeing how broken she was I should have been better. Whats worse is that she never hated me or judged me she just understood and kept being the kind Seung-wan that she is. I wish she hated me, it would make it easier." 

"What did you do?" I say in a soft tone, she looks at me with glassy eyes. 

"Our company found out about her relationship, my job was to make sure it stopped. "

"I'm sorry" I whisper. 

"Don't be, it's fine now. This happened when we were sort of rookies and she's dating someone now since we're older and have more choices so everything worked out." The sorrowful look in her eyes makes me think that its a lot deeper than she's saying but I don't ask she's been through enough. 

"Enough with the sad stories, tell me about yourself" she says with a bright smile, any evidence of her being upset wiped. 

 

.......................

"HAHAHHA, Chaeyoung why would you do that!" she laughs while playfully hitting me. We're both tipsy and have been talking non stop. 

"I had too! she stole my chocolate so I stole her straightener" 

"Poor Lisa" I role my eyes but smile feeling the buzz of the drinks and the energy surrounding Irene. 

"It's even funnier because we had to go to dance practice and she was performing for the class than she couldn't find it and the other girls were in different dorms so she had to perform with a massive hat on, but it fell off when she was dancing and her hair just went everywhere" I say giggling at the memory. 

"I never would have thought you were a trouble maker" she says amused. 

"well when you have Lisa and Jisoo as friends they rub off on you a little and you've got to protect yourself somehow" she smiles widely at me and just stares softly, usually I would shy away but how can I look away when she looks this beautiful and relaxed. 

"So you and Jennie had a lot to deal with then with that duo" My heart drops a little by the name, I was having so much fun I almost forgot about everything thats happened. She must have noticed my mood because she straightens. 

"Sorry" she says. 

"No don't be, Jennie was probably the biggest trouble maker out of all of us but she was also the protector so it was a good balance." the memories of us during trainee days flood in. Jennie sneaking into my room after she pulled a prank on jisoo or Lisa and her cute giggling when she heard them scream. She was so adorable, especially when Lisa made me upset Jennie would comfort me until I slept and than when I woke up Lisa was always to nice to me after and I always knew it was because Jennie would scare the poor girl for hurting me. 

while I was thinking Irene managed to move only inches away from me, her hand now moving to my face. 

"She loves you, I hope you know that" she says softly the way she says it with such seniority I believe her. Her hands still on my cheek her touch so light but the affect it has being their is heavy. 

"I know" I reply back. 

"You're beautiful" she says now looking right into my eyes. 

"So are you" I manage to say suddenly breathless. 

"Can I kiss you" I stared at her dazed un able to move. 

"Yes" is all I'm Able to say, she moves her hand that was on my cheek to the back of my head and through my hair. I do the same anticipating her touch. Were so close. 

*knock *knock *knock

"Ugh" me and Irene both sigh at the interruption. 

"I'll be right back" she says her voice hoarse. I just nod still to stunned not to form words. 

I look at the time and its 12:45 why would anyone be here. 

"Chaeyoung it's for you" Irene voices from the door. I feel anxiety knowing the only person who knows where irene lives is Jennie. I move slowly to the door. 

"Jisoo?" I say. 

"I'll let you two talk" irene says squeezing my arm as she walks past. 

"Hey pasta" Jisoo says looking nervous. 

"What are you doing here" I ask confused. 

"I was worried so I asked Jen where Irene stays" 

"I'm fine Jisoo you can leave" 

"Chaeng, I'm sorry I didn't tell you it wasn't my place" she says fidgeting around. 

"It's not just that, I know what you and Jennie think of me" I say looking down at the confession. 

"What are you talking about" she asks. 

"The night we were leaving America I heard yours and Jennies conversation " I say more confident. I see the way her eyes change once it clicks. 

"Pasta, . Come home and we can talk about this." 

"I'm not going back right now" 

"She's not there if thats what you're worried about" I should feel relief but knowing she's most likely at his house instead leaves an unpleasant feeling. 

"Please chaeng" 

"Fine, give me a minute" I say tiredly. 

I move to where irene is. 

"You've gotta go" she says with a smile. 

"Uh yes, thank you for everything irene you've honestly helped me so much" 

"you're welcome, I hope to see you soon" she says now in my space completely. 

"Is it o-okay if I get your number" she giggles by what I say. But hands me her phone. 

"Don't be a stranger" 

"I won't" I reply awkwardly. 

"I'll message you later, text me how things go" she says. 

......................................

"so you heard" jisoo says. 

"Yes" I reply, she leans back into her chair looking exhausted. 

" Who are you to assume things like that about me" I ask angrily. 

"Chaeng I'm sorry,  I may be wrong about your feelings towards her but thats just what it seemed like and I wanted her to stop whatever games she's playing. I know how much she affects you, I wanted to protect you." she says looking at me so uncharacteristically vulnerable. 

"You should have told me instead, you should have let me know I was being embarrassed behind closed doors. Imagine hearing that conversation in my perspective." I grip onto the pillow on the couch feeling so overwhelmed and frustrated. 

"I was trying to protect you"  I turn my head to face her. 

"Telling me would have been protecting me, it would have hurt knowing how she sees me but it would have been better than this! I look back at all of my memories with her now and have to second guess if any of it was real. It's not your fault unnie, but I wish you had told me." I say the last part quietly, again tears ready to fall but I won't cry for her anymore. 

"She loves you Chaeyoung, all of your memories are real everything is real never doubt that. But she likes to do things for her own entertainment and doesn't think about the consciences, thats all I was warning her about not her not being real with you. You two just need to talk and everything will be fine again." 

"Everyone keeps defending her and I'm over it, I can't just forget about what she's done everything isn't fine, it's not fine." 

I know if is wasn't tipsy I would have never talked to her the way I did but I can't help all these emotions. I feel betrayed by two people who I love the most. 

"Hey,hey  I know I'm for saying that. Chaeng did something else happen?" she's now moved in front of me kneeling. Her voice so soft and caring and I'm reminded that despite everything she was trying her best to protect me. But should I tell her about everything? 

"No unnie, im just upset about everything thats happened." 

"Chaeng I love you and hate seeing you like this, I'm here okay and I'll talk to Jennie about everything." 

"Don't tell Jennie I know about the conversation, I don't want her to think she was right or has something she can use against me." 

"Chaeng she's not like th-" 

"Jisoo please" she looks conflicted but nods her head in understanding. 

"Are we okay" she says now moving in between my legs and wrapping her arms around my waist. 

"Stop looking at me like that" I say.

"Like what" she says cutely and acting like she's not using her puppy dog eyes. 

"ugh shut up, but we're good. But Jisoo don't keep things from me again." She turns serious and pulls me closer so we're now hugging. 

"I won't" she says softly. 

"Lets go to bed" I say looking at the time exhausted from all of the events. 

"Can I sleep in your bed" she says rubbing her eyes cutely. 

"Sure, but that satan dog stays out"

"Yah! don't talk about my child like that"  she says pouting. 

I just smile at her cuteness and pull her to my room. 

"Night pasta"

"Night turtle rabbit"

............................

Its our first day back to the company, we've been told that we're finally making an album even if there is only 6 songs. But that also means working with Jennie, she didn't come home last night or today so i'm assuming she'll meet us there. 

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. 

"Okay so today is simple, just a few meetings about our concepts and also finalising the songs for the group" our manager says to us while he's driving. 

"Chaeng aren't you excited you're going to work on your solo" Lisa says happily next to me. I smile widely just by the thought. 

"I can't wait, but I don't want to get my hopes up like last time" I was suppose release my solo songs the same time as Jennie but yg changed his mind. I never blamed Jennie though, she was angrier than me and wanted to not debut her song but I convinced her to continue. Why should both of us suffer. 

"He won't he can't especially with Jennie ready to murder him if he does" she says laughing. I smile thinly. 

"Either way I'll be fine, we're having a comeback no matter what and thats all that matters." 

"Okay girls were here, just go to the conference room on the top floor and I'll go get your coffee orders. Did any of you want anything else?" he ask kindly. 

"no thanks" we all say in unison, we hurriedly get out of the van excited about finally producing music again. 

"Ugh, I'm so tired why do they always have meetings so early" Jisoo says grumpily. 

"Yah unnie! its 10am stop complaining" Lisa shouts excitedly skipping to the entrance of YG. 

"You're so annoying" she says rubbing her eyes cutely. I laugh a little at her especially when she's wearing fuzzy rabbit socks with track pants to one of the biggest companies in Korea. 

I pull Jisoo towards and hold her waist, she smiles warmly and leans onto my shoulder. 

"I know you're just nervous unnie, stop worrying you're perfect." I whisper, jisoo is defiantly the member that seems the strongest in herself, she defiantly is but I know how much pressure she feels when it involves work. 

"Thanks pasta" 

......................

Once we enter the building one of our many managers is already they're waiting for us patiently. 

"This way girls" She's fairly new and probably just a little older than I am. It's quite cute how flustered she gets but she does an amazing job. 

We're walking through the hallway and I can see the conference room through the glass walls. Relief floods me when I see that its empty at least I can prepare myself a little before she arrives. 

"The team will be here in 5 minutes" the manager says shyly. We nod our heads and walk in the the huge room. 

"Yah feels good to be back" Lisa says quietly looking around the room with glistening eyes. 

"It does" I say back. 

"Whens Jennies coming" Lisa ask and just then two figures walk past the glass walls. My heart doesn't clench as much as it did last night but the sting is still there when I see the smile and small hug she gives him before entering the room.  

The atmosphere is tense, Jisoo straightens up and Lisa looks between all of us worriedly. 

"Hey Jennie" I choose to say, She turns her head slightly to look at me. 

"She speaks now" she chooses to says sharply with a small smirk. Here I was trying to be mature and she bites back at me. I just roll my eyes and look away from her. 

She sits into the seat next to my own and not so subtilely pulls her chair so its right next to my own. 

"I didn't know you and Irene were so close" She says, leaning on her elbow to look me in the eyes. I can smell her Chanel perfume she's that close, it doesn't help she looks gorgeous today. 

" It didn't seem like something I needed to tell you" I say looking heatedly at her, using the same words she said to me the night before, the rooms silent but we don't pull our eyes away from each other. Both waiting for the other to cave. 

"Good morning girls" our creative director says, I slowly pull my eyes away from her. 

"Hello" we say to her, as the rest of our team walks in. I still feel her watching me but dismiss it and listen to our speakers. 

"Rosie, i'm sorry" Jennie whispers into my ear. We're still in the middle of our meeting. I don't reply because if I do I think I will cry and to do that in front of these people and her is not what I want. Her words leaves me with mixed emotions. She moves her hand underneath the table into my own. Her touch slow and hesitant I let her for a moment because I'm hopeless. But when she tries to intwine them I pull away. 

"Stop" I say quietly still looking forward to the person talking. She leaves me alone and I finally focus on what we're suppose to be. But I notice not once has my solo been talked about, maybe we'll talk about it at the end I think hopeful. 

"And thats all for today, thank you girls we're all looking forward to your comeback" 

"What about Rosies comeback" Jennie says loudly, I look at her stunned and I can tell the production team are all looking wary. 

"UH, we we're planning to talk to chaeyoung privately about that" 

"Thats fine but she will be releasing her single soon right" she ask staring them all down looking intimidating. 

"I-I, well she will be releasing her single but we've been informed it won't be this year." I stare at the staff hoping it's not true. it can't be. 

"Who informed you" jennies voice ask. 

"YG" 

"You're en joking" she says loudly, scoffing. 

"Jennie" jisoo says warningly. She just looks around, I can see her clenching her jaw and fist and knowing her she's 2 seconds away from blowing up. 

"Where is he now" she says to the scared less director. 

"Uh, I-in his office I think." As he finishes saying that Jennies up and out of her chair so fast I have barely enough time to run after her. 

"JENNIE" I shout finally catching up to her. 

"Jennie" she doesn't respond and keeps on walking to his office. I pull her towards me by the arm stopping her abruptly.

"What are you doing" I ask panicked. She looks at me softly. 

"Fixing this" she says with so much determination im stunned. 

"Jen, please lets just leave it for now" I say stressing. 

"Rosie no, not after last time" she says staring me in the eyes. She loosens her arm from my grip tenderly. 

"Jennie please" I say starting to worry, I don't want to cause any trouble and ruin our chance of a group comeback. 

She pulls me into her so where inches away from each other her right hand snaking around my waist. 

"I'll fix this just stay here" she says delicately. 

"You can't and its not your responsibility, its mine so leave it I don't want you getting in trouble for me" 

"Don't worry about me Rosie you deserve this solo and he's not ruining this for you again. He's already breaking our deal" she says the last part to herself and i'm confused by what she means but before I can question it she moves out of my arms and is gone leaving me clueless in the hallway. 

Did she mean the deal he made me I question. 

"Jennie why are you like this" I say frustrated. 

.........................................................................

#channie <3