Gently placing his glass on the table, he stood up and took a step forward but she stepped back as a response.  Jiyong wasn’t anticipating her to do that. A surge of emotion went through him as the memory of their break up flashed on him. He caused her too much pain.

“I’m really sorry for what I’ve done…I”

“Don’t..don’t come any closer, Ji.” Her voice was hoarse. She clutched her head, vague of her feelings. She was waiting for the day that he will come back but seeing him right in front of her, made her realized that she’s unready yet. The urge of defying him was heating on her nerves but she doesn’t have the energy.

“Dara, please.” His voice was so gentle. Hearing him called her name again brought back a lot of memories. It pinched her chest.

She’s supposed to be mad at him. Her mind wanted to shout it out that he’s not anymore the same person that she used to know. He broke up with her and did not even look back. It was just unfair that he didn’t let her speak. She was shocked. She partly blamed herself that it was her fault. Being faulty did not actually affect her that much. What hurt her was the verity that she wasn’t able to clear her side. It was so sudden that things ended that way and he just blurred out.

She closed her eyes, tried to maintain her composure.

“Why are you here?” She was trying to steady her voice.

“Can we talk, please…”

“It’s better if you just leave.” She said without meeting his eyes.

“Please,…just give me a minute.” His voice was pleading. Tears were forming in the corner of his eyes. He swallowed hard, trying to suppress his emotion.

She drew a heavy breath, controlling her insides. In no time, she might collapse again due to her current heartbeat.  “Don’t make me lose myself again. Just go.” Her voice was quivering yet she’s trying hard to show enough courage in front of him.

She wasn’t expecting herself to feel that way. In addition to that, she didn’t anticipate seeing him in her house. She wasn’t surprised, instead ambivalent emotions stirred up inside her. The mere fact that he left her crying that day, she thought he won’t show up anymore.

“Don’t do this to me please.” His eyes were begging. “Can you hear me out?”

“No. Not this time. I’m tired. Can you at least give me some privacy and not just barge in inside my house?”

“I won’t do you any harm. Just listen to me, please. I’m sorry I-“

“I’m going to call the police if you’re not going to leave in a minute.” She threatened though it was against her will. It was just her way of getting him out of her sight at the moment. She stepped towards the door. Her breath was ragged. A lump on started to form yet she swallowed hard. She still wasn’t meeting his gaze.

Jiyong stood lifeless with dropped shoulders. He was not expecting her to treat him that way and he never thought that it would cause him too much. It wasn’t just triple times. It was hundred times more heart-breaking than he ever thought. His chest was like being squeezed up to its last drop. Grabbing his jacket, he paced towards the door, devastated.

As soon as she shut the door behind her, tears flowed down freely. Her knees wobbled. She thought she was okay already. She thought the pain was gone. She thought she could just look him in the eye one day and pretend like nothing was wrong. She thought she had surpassed it but the moment she saw him, she’s still wasn’t okay.

+++++

“Hey, what’s up with the sunglasses?” Seung Hyun asked of nowhere.

Dara looked up and found him standing in front of her. She didn’t notice that he came because her mind was preoccupied with Jiyong.

“It’s nothing. I have sore eyes today.” She lied.

 “Oh, that must hurt.” He said with an unconvinced tone.

The guy sat beside her, placing his arms around her shoulders. With that simple friendly gesture, Dara was soothed. She wanted to open up to him but she wanted to hide it for the meantime.

“I’m not supposed to come today.” She said nonchalantly then let out a sigh.

“You shouldn’t be. Judging by how you look right now.”

She was quiet for a moment. No word came out of . Seung Hyun sensed that something was wrong but she was trying hard to hide it. For the past months, he knew that she was trying to convince him that she’s alright but not this time. The sunglass thing wasn’t her style same as her lame sore-eyes-reason. There must be something that he didn’t know and that thought occupied his mind for a moment.

”I forgot to thank you last night. Woah! I can’t believe myself that I can eat that many. I was overjoyed.” She said, breaking her silence.

Seung Hyun was silent.

“Hey, are you alright?” She removed his arms around her shoulders and lightly leaned on his shoulders instead. “Don’t worry I’ll be paying next time.”

“Yah! I should be the one asking you that.” He replied.

A small smile curved on her lips. “Don’t worry I’m going to be fine.”

He pressed her arm as a response.

There was a short silence, freeing their minds.

“I’m thinking of going on a trip this weekend. It’ll be fun if you come with me.” He said breaking the silence between them.

“Um, I’ll think about it.” She replied.

“Hey, I know what that tone means.”

Seung Hyun shifted and faced her. He wanted to comfort her and make her forget what’s been bothering her for the meantime. What she went through was a real tough one. He witnessed how she handled it. Apparently, no matter how she to hide her grievances, she was still transparent to him.

She let out a heavy breath.

He was bothered just by hearing it. “Come on, just let it out. You know you can trust me on that.”

“It’s not like I’m hiding it from you. It’s just that I’m kind of uncomfortable talking about it right now.”

“Yeah, there are things in life that are better left unspoken. But if you decide to just keep it to yourself and continue hurting, it may not be a good idea.”

“You taught me that.”

“You know I care about you. I don’t want to see a frown drawn on your face. I don’t want you hurting yourself.”

“Thanks for the care. I do appreciate all your effort. Thank you might not be enough to repay my debts to you. Aaah, you’re a hero Choi Seung Hyun.”

A smile flashed on Seung Hyun face. Her words were overwhelming but he can’t deny the fact that he’s affected everytime she chose to be lonely that sharing it with him.

+++++

Her phone rang for several times but she was ignoring it. It’s been two nights that she didn’t sleep a wink. The thought of him was freaking her out. No matter how she tried to make herself believe that she’s fine, it’s not just working. She was completely in daze just thinking about talking to him again. Her mind was telling her to reach out to him and make things clear between them.

It was past midnight already when she glanced at the clock. Taking a cup of coffee, she opened the window of her bedroom to breathe the midnight breeze. The wind was chilly sending humid air inside her window. She shivered lightly. It was quiet outside. After taking a sip, she went back to the couch and rested.  Her petite body was settled on the soft cushion and for a moment she wished that she would settle even more and just disappear. She heaved a sigh and coveted that the issue between her and Jiyong will be over soon.

Picking up her phone, she unlocked it and saw a message from Jiyong telling that he’s outside her door and if she can open it for him. She hesitated. She’s not sure yet if she can face him already. Her mind was blank and can’t even think straight on what to decide. Getting up, she walked towards the door and was about to turn the knob when her phone rang again. Her chest thudded and started to pound like crazy making her to lean on the panel. It was him.

After a short while, she took the call out of wit.

“Hi. I’m glad you picked up. How are you?” Jiyong’s voice was soft and gentle.

Dara didn’t utter a word. She was refreshing her mind how sweet his voice was.

“I know you’re still upset. I’m sorry. I don’t wanna interrupt your night. It’s just that, I miss you so much, Dar. I can’t help it.”

Her inside melted upon hearing him say it. She swallowed hard, clearing the lump on . Her heart palpitated not like the usual. It was faster.

“Don’t worry I won’t make things hard on you. I’m ready for whatever consequence it might lead me. I know I’m pathetic enough to make you feel that way. I was a coward. I should’ve not done that to you in the first place. I should’ve not hurt you. I should’ve not left you. You didn’t know how miserable I was when you were out of my sight. I was in hell, Dara. I was living in the damn dark for the past months but I just don’t have the courage to face you.”

Dara was still silent. Tears were pooling on her eyes but she tried to suppress it.

“I thought I can just give you up in time but I was wrong. I thought drinking and going out at night will make me feel better somehow. I realized, it wasn’t just like that. When the alcohol’s gone, I’m back to hell. I cannot sleep a wink without thinking of you.” Jiyong continued as tears were flowing down on his cheeks.

The tears that she’d been holding back flowed freely.

“I won’t expect forgiveness. I just want to apologize and live life like before. Can you do that one last favour for me, please?” His voice was cracking.

His words stung, comprehending to the last statement he said. Does that mean he’s exiting on her life? She cried realizing that he’d be gone. From the other line, Jiyong can hear her sobs. It tore his heart into pieces. If only there’s no door behind them, he’d burry her on his chest and kiss her tears away.

+++++++++++

Yay! So happy that I was able to add another chap to this one. How’d you find it? Boring? Nonesense? Random? Hahaha, anyways thanks pinkblue, xara10 and daramaegon for dropping your comments last time. Thank you, ladies!