Bang YongGuk

For two weeks, I didn't hear of HaSeul. I was so relieved. She finally understood that she deserved better than me. But it left an empty space in my heart; HaSeul used to fill my week up to four hours when she could, plus bringing distractions with her books. I missed her a lot. Her books recommendations. Her tomboy style. Her cute bunny teeths. I usually thought a lot about her on my desk. I took back the road of the jail library and sighed. No exciting new shining book. No precise recommendation by HaSeul to know if it was good or not.

It's crazy how in those months she took an immense place in my life. Yesterday, it was tuesday and I checked the hour a lot, as if I was expecting her to come, when I talked that harshly with her. It was the third parlor hour she missed. She wouldn't come back now, right ?

I was reading a book when Daehyun came to my cell. "Bang YongGuk, you have a visitor."

Daehyun smiled to me and I closed my book, suspicious. "Who is it ?"

"Choi HaSeul."

I shivered and tried not to show how troubled I was. So she didn't give up on me ? I made a fist out of my hand. "I won't see her."

JongUp raised his head to me and I opened back my book to read. Daehyun left without any another words.

*

Since that first time, she came each day. Daehyun came for two weeks on a daily basis to tell me she was waiting for me at the parlor room. I usually shook my head, repeating that I won't see her at all.I Today, as Daehyun came to ask me if I wanted to see her, after hearing my answer, he pursed his lips. Daehyun closed our door behind himself and looked at me absolutely exasperated.

"Bang YongGuk. She comes day after day. You really think you are helping her right now ? You have to see her at least one last time" He told me harshly.

I gave him a cold glare. "I won't."

Daehyun scoffed. "Remember I'm an guard ? I have authority on you. You have a good file for those seven years. I can make your life a complete hell YongGuk. Don't play with me because I will win."

We stared at each other for long seconds. It was the first time Daehyun talked to me this way. He was always so sweet and gentle, at least with me, always laughing around. So I couldn't believe he threathened me so I'd go visit HaSeul. How come he would do this ? I looked down and groaned.

He clapped in his hands, smiley. "Take time to refresh yourself."

I did as told, taking way more time than I usually do, this being my only way to show how unsatisfied I was. When I came to his side, he was smiling. "If I knew you would have obey that well, I would have done that way earlier."

I rolled my eyes and followed him to the parlor room.  Before opening the door, DaeHyun patted my shoulder. " Please, just talk to her okay ? If you really like her let her have some closure and move on. "

I groaned and followed him inside the room. My eyes found HaSeul sat down, quietly fidgeting the wood book I gave her. Did she always had that sad aura around her ? As she raised her eyes, she stood up, in shock. "You came."

I scoffed. "Daehyun threathened me." She nodded in a sad manner. "Sorry I'm being egoist. I'm aware of being selfish."

*

Choi HaSeul

YongGuk stayed silent after I told him I was selfish. He didn't look happy to be there. I didn't ask Daehyun to do this for me but I was so thanksful he did that. Or else how would I cope without seeing him ?  As I sat back, he looked at the chair that was the most distant from me to sit down. I felt a bit ashamed. He didn't want to be here, clearly.

I haven't been sleeping a lot since we last saw each other. But I've been drinking a lot especially at night. I looked horrible with my dark circles and people that saw me usually assumed I was sick because of how pale I was.

My eyes stared at his collarbone, at his well defined lips, his moles on his face. He looked uneasy, not daring to look at me in the eyes. I was unlike him determined. He didn't want to see me and I could feel that, it was awkward between us.Everything changed. 

"I'll stop bothering you soon. If … If you tell me about your murder, I can leave here and get rid of my feelings for you. I have to know. You always tell me my sixth sense is wicked. Bang YongGuk I have to know and the person who have to tell me is you. "

He thought for a long time about what I just said. He was sit away from me, unlike the other time. I gave him a strong look and he sighed, his attitude changing. He relaxed on his chair, with a wicked smile. " I'll tell you about it. But I have to get something in exchange. What about telling me more about your parents ? You don't like talking about them right ? "

I was hurt by his words and bite my lips. I hated to talk about them. He looked at me and I got it. He hated to talk about the reason why he is here, his ... murder and picked a taboo subject for me too. The association was right about that, you shouldn't disclose too much informations about you.  YongGuk gave me a smirck. " I suggest you go first, HaSeul. "

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