That evening, I called Jae to pick me up after work, but found out he had arrived 15 minutes before my shift ended and waited patiently in the parking lot. He had invited me earlier that day to visit his home and have dinner together.

“Hi, did you wait long?” I got into his car after he had opened the door for me.

“No, I just came.” He lied.

I felt myself sitting on top of a hard object on the passenger seat and reached for it. I grabbed it and held it up. It was a gray velvet jewelry box slightly bigger than a ring box.

“Oh? What’s this?” I asked, glancing at him while holding up the box. His cheekbones slightly protruded from beneath his flawless skin as he internally fought against the corners of his lips, preventing them from curving willingly. The way he tried to hide his smile was too adorable.

“Hhm I wonder who left it there. It’s not mine, but you found it so it’s yours. Open it.” He finally gave in to his muscles, letting them work their magic as one big brilliant smile radiated across his face.  I opened it and was astonished. Inside was a sparkling silver necklace with a diamond covered heart pendant hung loosely at the middle. It was beautiful.

“ This…” I gasped. “this is..”

“Nice right? Hehe I hope you like it.”

“But it’s too much, I can’t accept this..” I closed the lid and handed him the box.

“Don’t worry! It’s a small gift from me so take it.” He shoved it back into my hand.

“But…”

“Too bad. You found it so it’s yours. Take it.” He grabbed the box and opened it, unhooking the necklace from its place and held it up. “Turn around.”

Without realizing, I did as I was told and Jae’s arm was swung around me. He placed the necklace gently around my neck and hooked it in place. He grabbed my hands and looked me in the eyes with earnestness.

“Will you be my girlfriend?” He asked.

I was utterly speechless and swept away by the surprising question. I happily accepted his request with a slight nod and smiled. Jae leaned in closer and pressed his soft lips gently against mine.

We went to a nearby supermarket to purchase grocery for our dinner. Afterwards, he drove me to his wealthy home located on a hill near Beverly Hills. The house was a two story mansion, intricately built with a modern design. It was well-kept and stylishly decorated, something that a writer would have as a home.

“Wow. You live here all by yourself?” I plopped down on a leather sofa. “It’s huge.”

“It gets lonely you know.” He walked towards the kitchen and pulled out two empty cups from the cabinet. “Would you like juice or water?”

“Water’s fine.” I got up and walked around his house, examining the paintings on the wall. Jae appeared from behind me and nudged my hand, slipping the cup into my grasp. He grabbed my other hand and slightly pulled me deeper into his home.

“Come, I’ll show you around.”

He led me upstairs into his office, where he usually spent most of his time brainstorming and writing. Surrounding the room were bookshelves filled with thousands of books, it was like an entire library in one room. In the middle of the room stood a big oak desk, and on it were a computer and two picture frames.

“Wow…” I walked up to his desk and examined the pictures. I picked up the one with a couple and two boys.

“They’re my parents and younger brother. I was eight I think? It was like 2 years before their car accident. Most of the pictures were burnt in the fire back then so these are the only pictures I have of them.”

I quickly set down the picture after realizing that I had unintentionally poked at his deepest scar. “I’m..so sorry.”

“It’s a long time ago, no worries.” He shrugged. He picked up another picture of two boys on the swing and smiled to himself. “This is my little brother.”

“Wow you guys looked like twins when you were young. He’s a year younger than you right? I remembered from the book you wrote about him.”

“Yea when we were younger they thought we were twins. As we got older our face started changing, I looked more like my dad and he looked like my mom. Here let me show you.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a wallet. He flipped it open to the photo section and there were two pictures, one was of his mom and dad, the other one caught my eyes instantly. I gasped in disbelief.

“It’s..it’s him…” I pointed to a picture of Hyun Joong, who looked exactly like how I’d seen him.

“You know him?” Jae asked, baffled and surprised at my reaction.

“Oh no I don’t, just maybe I’ve seen him somewhere?” I chuckled nervously, hoping Jae wouldn’t detect my lies. He nodded in comprehension without any suspicion.

“There were some things I didn’t write in my book about him. Things pertaining to his death, I sort of wrote a bunch of lies.” His eyes became somber and heavy with grief.

“You know we were really poor back then,when I was a nobody.” Jae continued on with his story. “Hyun Joong and I lived together in a small apartment we rented after we were old enough to leave the orphanage. It was my dream to become a writer and so at the time I was working on a book, hoping to get it published one day. Hyun Joong really cared for me, he wanted me to pursue my dream and so he’d given up school to work two jobs to pay for our living expenses and my medical expenses.  My health was extremely bad and so I was useless. Looking back now, I felt really ashamed for not being able to take care of him like an older brother should. Even though I’m his Hyung, it was like as if he was mine instead. He was a great person. He was possibly the most unselfish and kindest person I’ve ever met…”

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“Yosh! Hyun Joong I’m done with my book!” I yelled out in triumphant as I stared at the accomplishment I’d been working on since the beginning of time. “Now I just need to have it edited and hopefully have a publisher publish it. If I succeed, you won’t have to work anymore bro!”

“Good! I’ve been waiting you to say that!” Hyun Joong teasingly yelled back from the kitchen. The smell of fried eggs filled the entire apartment, making my stomach churned with hunger. “Hyung! Come and eat!”

I walked to the kitchen and helped him set the plates on our small fold up table that we used to dine on. Our dinner consisted of fried eggs and rice with steamed cabbage. “Wow bro, eggs for 10 consecutive days, I think we broke the record.”

“Fine fine, I’ll go get some nice take outs for us alright? If you don’t want this, just save it for tomorrow.”

“No it’s fine! Go get me some drinks. We’ll celebrate tonight.”
“Hyung, you know the doctor said you shouldn’t drink.”
“I know I know. You can drink for me. I’ll sip on root beer if that makes you feel better.”

He shook his head and smiled to himself. He set the apron down and headed out. “I’ll be back.”

It was Hyun Joong’s 20^th birthday and he didn’t seem to remember a thing. It was the only way to get him out of the house so I could surprise him with some dishes I intended on making. I shrink wrapped the eggs and cabbage and set them aside, then proceeded to the kitchen and prepared the meals. Miso soup will have to be on the list tonight since it was his favorite. Thanks to our mother, I was able to learn a few things from her when I was younger. I the oven and boiled some water while cutting up the tofu. Unfortunately, I felt a sharp pain jabbing at my stomach, which instantly traveled towards my rear end.

“Oh crap! Not now.” I quickly darted to the bathroom to relieve my stomach.

After what seemed like a century, my stomachache finally subsided. As I was wrapping up my business, a strong smell of smoke filled my nostril. Smoke was rising through the air as they traveled through the crack beneath the bathroom door. Panicked, I grabbed the handle and immediately let go after realizing it was burning hot. I used a towel nearby to wrap my hand and grabbed the door knob, but it won’t budge.  Suddenly, I remembered I had left the stove on and it must’ve caught something nearby to set our place on fire. I tugged on the knob as hard as I could but couldn’t get it open. I threw my body against the door, hoping to knock it down somehow but it was to no avail. At that moment, the smoke filled my lungs and I began to choke. My inhaler was nowhere nearby and my asthma started kicking in. , I think I’m going to die here tonight. I collapsed onto the floor and my vision blurred into darkness.

“Hyung! Hyung!” I woke up to the sound of Hyun Joong screaming outside the door, trying to knock it down. I looked through the crack and realized there were flames inside our apartment. I pushed with all my might, trying to fight against my strength to stand back up and knock down the door, but my body refused to cooperate.

“Hyun Joong..be careful.” My voice was hoarse and my throat felt dry. My asthma attack worsened once again and I started gasping for air. My eyes stung from the thick lingering smoke, causing my vision to blur. After several minutes, a gush of hot air slapped my face as Hyun Joong busted the door down and ran to my side. He helped me up and carried me on his back as we headed towards the door. By now the fire was engulfing the entire apartment and it was getting extremely hot. The ceiling was starting to collapse as pieces of burning woods fell in front of us. In the distance we could hear the sound of siren approaching which kept our hopes up. I really thought everything was going to be okay.

“We’ll be okay Hyung. C’mon, stay with me. I’ll get us out.” I heard Hyun Joong comforted me while I continued gasping for air. The fire spread towards the doorway and pieces of the ceiling fell in front of us, blockading our exit. Hyun Joong carried me to the nearest window, which was nearly engulfed in flame and set me down. He used a chair and swung it with all his force to break open the glass window, then lifted me up and shoved me through it. I screamed in pain as my leg scraped against a piece of broken glass. Before I knew it, I was out in the open air with a wounded leg. My strength finally left me all together as I lied on the pavement, gasping for oxygen.

However, I started to panic after realizing I was alone. I glanced at the window, hoping to see Hyun Joong escaping as well. Instead, I saw angry flames spilling out from every opening of our apartment. At that moment, I tried to scream but no sound came out. I tried to crawl towards the window where I had came out of, hoping to heave myself up and through it so I could help him out, but several firefighters came and dragged me back. It all happened too quickly. I remembered seeing paramedics putting me on a stretcher and giving me the nebulizer to stabilize my breathing while treating my wound and asking me questions. I remembered telling them Hyun Joong was still inside and hoping that they could save him, hoping that they would come up to me and tell me that he was still alive and breathing.

The siren screamed a pitiful tune as I was rushed to the hospital, leaving behind me my hopes, my home, and the memories of my little brother, whose face I will never see again.

And it was all my fault…

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