three

"Ro! Slow down!" Kai yelled, as I pounded away at the pedals of my bike up the trail, trying to keep up with me. He was doing his best but was rapidly falling behind as I pedalled harder and faster. My body was on automatic, too much going on in my head to focus. I had to get all these feelings out of my head and exercise was the only way I knew how to do it. 

I wasn't taking the time to enjoy the view as I whizzed past the trees, sunlight grazing my skin as it twinkled through the leaves. Everything had merged into a great green blur, the wind forcing me to shut my eyes.

"Ro! Watch out!" Kai screamed. I forced my eyes open to see my bike rapidly converging on a freshly fallen tree, blocking the trail. I clutched the brakes as hard as I could muster but I was going too fast to properly stop. Next thing I knew, the front wheel of my bike collided and I was flying, my bodying arching over the handles. I barely had time to cry out before by back slammed into the ground, my head smacking down against the trail a moment later. My vision swum as a ringing set into my ears. I could hear the blood rushing into my head, louder than a thousand drums. I knew better than to try and stand.

I could hear Kai slowing down on his bike, saw him jump over the log expertedly like a jaguar and land right beside me.

"Don't move, Ro. You might have broken something" Nestling down next to my hand, Kai began to slowly run this hands over my arms, lightly applying pressure to different spots. 

"Tell me if this hurts" As he searched my body for any signs of injury, I mentally scolded myself. I had truly been unprepared for today. I had worn my helmet so at least I could rule out a concussion.

"I'm dying" I moaned, throwning my arm over my face and sticking out my tongue. I could almost hear him rolling his eyes.

"Get up" 

"Never" I flopped my arms down, pretending to lose all power in my limbs. I felt his arms wiggle under my body and lock together.

"Come on"

"MMmm" I declared and flopped down even heavier than before. As Kai lifted my weight, I felt a deep burning sensation from against my back. I jumped up as quickly as possible, unlocking his hands from under me and lifting up my shirt to look. The skin across my back was raw and red, some patches even cut open and bleeding freely. I touched the skin cautiously and immediately regretted it. My back was burning.

"Wait" Kai stepped away, leaning over the offending tree trunk. He stood up holding a water bottle and motioned towards me as he opened it. Wincing, I pulled up the back and grimaced as he poured it down my back and gently brushed any dirt away.

"Come and sit down. Tell me what's up with you"

We settled down to sit, digging our legs into the fresh grass and leaves beneath us.

"Everything is just so ed up right now" I murmured, leaning into Kai's chest and looking up into the blanket of leaves that covered the forest roof. My bike was wrecked, the front tire twisted out of recognition, making the whole thing impossible to ride. We had decided to make the best of a bad day and were resting against a tree near the end of the trail that lead to a waterfall. My back hurt, the skin all grazed and raw but Kai's hand slung across my back cooled my skin down. 

"Is that why you were riding like Evil Knievel" he joked, poking me playfully in the rubs. I swatted his hand away and winced as my skin protested against the movement. Kai placed his hand on my leg reassuringly,

"Chill. Tell me what's up"

"I'm just so angry. I can't...I can't even find the words for it. I.." I had to sit up now. A little ball of anger was ricocheting around my rib cage, gathering more speed every second. I thought I could pedal all this anger out and let it burn away from but it was still building.

"She just deserves so much better than this. She...she's such a good person. And it makes me so...so ing furious" I was balling my hands into fists now, the muscles running up and down my arms tensing. Even just to think about it, it made me blind with rage. She really did deserve better than this. My sister was a good person, a genuinely good person. She had spent her life working hard, achieving every goal she set for herself, allowing every setback to teach her a valuable lesson. She was my role model. She gave more than she ever received. I had never known her to want anything as badly as she wanted this. And every chance she got was being taken from her. 

"It just isn't fair!" I grunted, punctuating every word by punching my fists together, knocking my knuckles against each other. When that wasn't enough, I searched frantically around me to find something harder. Finding a rock poking out from the ground near us, I launched my fist into it, hearing the satisfying crack of bone against rock. I threw another fist, then another, the pain shooting up my arms. 

"Ro, Ro, RO. Stop it!" Kai demanded, grabbing my fists in his hands and pulling me against him. I struggled against him slightly, wriggling against his chest. I just needed to punch one more thing to make the hurt go away.

"Breathe" he whispered into my hair. His arms around me were firm but gentle. Warm and reassuring. As I allowed myself to get comfortable, my face in the crook of his neck, I pressed my cheek against his exposed shoulder and breathed him in. I was lying on top of him now, his back against a tree, me half straddling his legs. I wrapped one arm around his neck and the hair at the nape of his neck, the other clutching a handful of his singlet.

"You smell nice" I murmered into his clothes. Kai was my rock. He always knew what to do and what to say whenever I needed him. If I didn't know any better, I'd say he was my soulmate. I pulled away from him slowly, realising he hadn't said anything and slid slowly off his lap. Kai still had his arms around me, he had just loosened his grip. I took this opportunity to look at him, to really look at him. So much had happened in the past week that I hadn't really had the chance to appreciate him.

His new silver blond hair was perfect against his bronze skin, which he occasionally got teased for but I loved. His face had slimmed down over the summer, revealing a killer jaw line that impressed even me. My eyes travelled downwards to his broad shoulders. It was as if he had morphed into a completely different person. 

"Enjoying the view are we?" I looked up, caught, to find those dark eyes gleaming at me and that cheeky perfect smile pointed right at me. One thing hadn't changed. He was still such a flirt.

"You're weird" I teased, sticking my tongue out at him and removing his arms from around me completely. He winked at me, flashing me that charming smile again and reached out to bring me back into the cuddle. I narrowly dodged his reach, leaning backwards and falling onto my back and onto my grazed skin. As I groaned, albeit overdramatically, Kai leaned over me, his body parallel above mine and smirked. He balanced his weight expertedly, hands placed beside my head. I couldn't look away. Kai was still smiling at me, biting his lip as he stared down at me. I felt as if he was daring me to do something, anything. As my sight caressed his face, I settled to look at his lips and paused, catching myself.

"You're an idiot" Kai laughed, leaning back to rest on his calfs, pulling me up by my arms. I moved away from him slightly, pulling my tank top down to cover my stomach. My cheeks were burning now and I felt slightly out of breath. Feeling embarassed, I turned away and fiddled with my hair, pushing stray whisps away from my face. I had to change the pace quickly. 

"Why did you break up with Hani?" Kai's mischevious smile disappeared, replaced with a look of thoughtfulness. He scooted back to his original position, back against the tree and sighed loudly. He looked over to me softly and patted the ground next to him, beckoning me to sit near him. I crawled over to him, sure that I would have grass stains all over my knees by the end of the day. I leant against the tree beside him, painfully aware of how sensitive my skin felt against his.

"I broke up with Hani because...well because I..." Kai paused and bit his lip. He was so tight-lipped sometimes. I knew that he found it hard to express his feelings at times but I could read him like a book.

"Did you..?" I prompted. He nodded.

"I liked someone else"

"Oh" my lips tentatively, I waited for him to talk more. I felt uneasy. Suddenly, the idea of him liking someone else than Hani didn't sit well with me. I tried to guess who it could be. I knew Kai wasn't short of admirers. He had a lot going for him. He was popular, athletic like several of his friends and an amazing dancer. He was also incredibly goodlooking, even I had to admit to this. I wondered who this girl was. Was she even good enough for him?

"And Hani could tell. We fought a lot about it" he was gazing out at the ridge in front of him, barely acknowledging my existence. He leaned his head head back against the bark of the tree, hair almost completely covering his eyes. Sunlight crept between the leaves, settling little kisses on his skin.

"Why didn't you just go out with the girl you liked?" I pursued, reluctantly, ignoring the pain in my stomach. I attributed it to my fluctuating emotions over the past few days. I hadn't eaten a proper breakfast either and no doubt I was still feeling the effects of my crash throughout my body.

"She was with someone else at the time" Kai fixed his gaze on me, "Plus, she doesn't look at me that way", he let out a hollow laugh and his lips again before letting out a noise of annoyance.

"Way to depress me Ro. Good job" He flicked me gently and with a of his quick reflexes, he had his arm around my neck, pulling me in again. We had been doing a lot of hugging today. We spent the next few minute trying to get each other into respective headlocks, him having more luck that me. 

"Shall we go for a swim?" I suggested, standing up and stretching, my tank top riding up slightly. We had spent enough time rolling about in the earth. My skin felt sticky and sweaty and I wanted to wash away any dirt that had rolled into my grazes. Grabbing his forearm, I did my best to pull him to his feet and started to drag him to a place I knew we could swim. 

"I'm too tired. You're gonna have to carry me" Kai demanded, putting on his most childlike voice and wrapping his arms around my shoulders and pressing his weight ever so slightly onto my back. I pretended to struggle, wobbling my legs all over place, making exaggerated huffing noises. I imagined myself looking like a penguin the way I was waddling all over the place. I tried to wrap my hands around his biceps as we trudged along but struggled. He had beefed up quite a bit over summer. 

Kai stayed stuck to me, making our journey to the waterfall twice as long as it needed to be. As we approached, his arms slid back down to his sides and I noticed that moment how warm he was. We started at the pool ahead of us. Not many people visited this part of the forest. Not because it was unknown, it was just rather difficult to get to. Kai and I had cycled for about 45 minutes at a breakneck speed and we still had to walk for another half hour before reaching it. 

"It's been ages since we last came here" Kai remarked, nudging me slightly. Had he not been travelling (or dating Hani) we would have spent most of our summer here. I guess we would have invited some of our friends along, but this was our place. The gentle sound of trickling water and the peaceful tune of nature encapsulated us. It was like being in our own little bubble. Shuffling off my trainer, I pulled my sock off and dipped my toes into the water. The summer sun had warmed it slightly, water so clear I could see the sand at the bottom. I kicked off the other shoe. 

"Are you coming?" Psyching myself up, I yanked my top up, pulling it over my head and dropping it by my feet. Thank goodness I'd worn a sports bra today. Kai and I were close, but not that close. Counting to three in my head, I took of my biking short and without taking a glance at Kai, waded into the water. Waiting until I was waist deep before turning around, I watched as he undressed.

Painfully slowly, Kai undid his jacket and dropped it near my clothes. Kicking off his trainers, he gripsed the bottom of his singlet and pulled it over his head, the muscles in his arms flexing oh so slightly. Under his shirt laid ab muscles I had never seen before. I mean, Kai had always been fit but never this fit. I almost didn't know where to look. Who was this boy? Kai removed his sweatpants and followed me into the water. As he reached me, he lifted his legs up and started to float.

"You always make that look so easy" I grumbled, trying to mimick his movements. I pulled my legs up, trying to float as effortlessly as he did but panicked as soon as the water passed my ears. I went under briefly, popping up again, spluttering up against a mouthful of water. Kai laughed whole heartedly at me.

"How could you!" I accused, trying to push all my water logged hair out of my face and my mouth as I struggled to tread water without my hands to help. Pushing my hair away from my face, Kai simply shook his head at me and laughed.

"You would actually be helpless without me" I snorted 'gracefully'

"Puh-lease. I survived a whole summer without you, dummy!" I pushed down on his shoulder and he ducked under the water to escape my wrath. Popping up the pther side of me, he placed his hand on the small of my back.

"Just lean back and relax. I'll teach you" Pressing on my collarbone slightly, Kai urged me to lay back in the water. I started tensing up as the water reached my ears, but his voice stopped me.

"I'm not gonna let you drown" he was now supporting my neck and torso. I tried to breathe calmly, following his instruction. Eventually, his hands slipped away and with all my might I forced my body to stay above the water.

"You're doing it"

"Really?" I looked up, breaking my concentration and fell under again. Kai grabbed me just as I bobbed under, pulling me up again. 

"You ruined it" I groaned, trying to splash him as best as possible. Kai released my arm and started to splash me back, his swipes stronger and more targeted than mine. Knowing I had met my match, I had to use dirty tactics. I drove at him, wrapping my arms and legs around him as tight as possible so he could no longer move. 

"Stop the violence!" I cried, laughing as he struggled to get free from my vice like grip. Kai yanked his arms away, wrapping one arm around my waist and pinning me to him, while running his fingers through his hair. He growled at me.

"You're a pain, you know that"

"Let's take a picture together" I declared, aware that he had been holding onto me for so long. I fumbled in my shorts for my phone that had somehow managed not to be destroyed during my accident. Sliding my wet finger across the screen, our faces appeared, then another photo, a nice one of us. We looked so happy. Kai had left the water and sat beside me on the rocks. He took the phone from my hand, the screen.

"I remember that day" he paused, rubbing a thumb across the image. He swiped my camera open and our wet, sun glazed faces appeared. I smiled. Kai took a few snaps, then reached for his own phone.

"My turn" He extended an arm to take a selfie and I pressed up next to him, squishing his cheeks with my fingers. 

"This is the best you've ever looked"

Having decided to head back before the sunset, Kai started to get ready as I pranced about, enjoying the last bit of sunlight. Any feelings of anger and disappointment had dissapated, or at least gone down to a simmer as I twirled about feeling the ground beneath my feet. As I slowed down, I stopped to find Kai looking at me.

"What?" I giggled, clutching my hands across my chest. I still needed to get dressed. He shook his head.

"Get ready"

We took our time walking home, not that we could have used our bikes as mine was well and truly totalled. What could have been a journey of chatter was comfortable silence. I enjoyed spending time with him like we usually did. When he wasn't around it always felt like something was missing. As we cornered into my driveway, tucking my bike near the gates to get fixed tomorrow, I braved to ask the question that had been at the back of my mind.

"This girl you liked-"

"Like, Ro. I still like her" I jumped slightly at the sentiment. Even after the whole summer away and dating someone new, Kai still had feelings for someone. She had to be special. It almost unsettled me to think that someone was almost as important to him as he was to me. I pushed my key into the lock,

"Are you planning on telling her? I mean, tell her that you like her?" I was suddenly afraid of being left out of another secret. First with my family, now Kai. I nudged him firmly, "Well?" 

Kai sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. He looked cute doing that.

"When she knows, you'll be the first to know ok? Just give it time" He leaned in and gave me a brief hug before jogging down the steps. He turned to say something but looked behind me and waved.

"Hi Sophie" Sophie appeared beside me, slinging her arm around  my neck and waved back.

"See you around, Jongin" As he retreaed from the building, swinging his leg over his bike and riding away, I felt eyes burning into my skin. I turned to see Sophie giving me a knowing look.

"That's Jongin"

"Yes"

"Little Jongin"

"What's your point, Soph?" She tutted loudly and shook her head at me. Her mood had improved slightly over the past few days and she was walking about the house now, finding ways to keep her mind occupied.

"I'd keep an eye on that one Rose. He's blossomed"