-Jungkook’s POV-

I know what I saw. Jin. How is he dead and still talking to me though? Am I the only one that can see him? What does he mean by he killed himself? Why did he do it? Great, now I’m asking all the questions. All I can do to myself is ask questions though. It’s hard to follow these steps I’m trying to take. Something’s holding me back. It’s almost like it doesn’t want me to remember Jin, I feel like Jin is just becoming more of a disconnection. I mean, he is dead and all, but I would talk to him every night before I go to bed. I haven’t been doing that lately.

“We will now begin the burial session.” I look up and see everyone crying and didn’t notice I was too. ‘ Was I really that zoned out I cried from my own realizations, and not the funeral? ‘

“Come on, Kookie.” I hear someone whisper, I look to my left and see Yoongi. My eyes are hurting but widened the slightest as I see him crying, choking on his words, rubbing his eyes. Yoongi isn’t emotional, as you have probably noticed. I know that anyone would probably be this overwhelmed at their best friends funeral, but Yoongi would usually just shed a few tears and remember the good times. You know try to stay happy. That’s what it was like at Tae’s grandma’s funeral. He would always say how she was more like a mother to him than his own.

“Yeah. I’m coming.” I whisper back, only to notice he’s already gone way ahead of me. I start walking outside and see that they are just now starting the burial. Just in time. I hear his family say a couple of words before they ‘officially’ start, instead of family I should really just say brother.

“Jin, uh, Kim Seokjin. He was not just my brother but he was my best friend. Up until I had went to college we would do everything together. Um, that varied from stealing toys from each other when we were in diapers to bidding our goodbyes when I was set off for school purposes. I would say one of the most memorable moments in my life with him was when he was 13 and I was 15. Our dog, Jangu, had gotten very ill and Jin was very upset. He would check on the dog maybe nine times a minute,” he chuckled in between words, his eyes starting to water until a couple tears were finally shed, “I was with him one time when he said this, ‘Seok Jung! Seok Jung! Jangu he-he won’t wake up!’ I ran into the room and held Jangu in my hands and realized he had passed. I walked over to Jin and hugged him. We both cried, only because we had had Jangu since Jin was maybe three or four years old. I told him that we would go get ice cream and that I would get him any video game he wanted. Of course he chose Mario Kart. Goodness, he loved that game so much. I once played a game with him, thinking I could beat him since I had also played when I was his age. I guess I had thought wrong. He beat me about a hundred times before he purposely let me win a game or two. I guess I just-I should’ve spent more time with him.” By this time Seok Jung was crying up a tsunami. I felt terrible.

I walk up to him and hugged him the tightest I had ever. He hugged back a couple of seconds after, taken aback by my sudden action.

“It couldn’t have been said better.” I whispered to him. He smiled and wiped his tears off of his face.

Moments later the burial session began. And boy did I suffer.I wouldn’t stop crying. I couldn’t stop asking questions in my head. I just won’t.

My life is changing. And definitely not slow.