Later that day, I’m helping Ji-eun clean down the bar as we get ready for dinnertime service, whilst Nichkhun is busy in the kitchen. Usually, I would be in there with him, helping him prepare or watching him closely like a good apprentice normally does, but today he seems to want me out of his hair.

After our stressful and yet oddly relieving morning, Khun has avoided me most of the day. It's almost as if he is embarrassed about his past, though he really has no good reason to be. It's not like his ex-boyfriend leaving him was his fault or anything, right?

Those words resonate through my skull again, they seem to have been haunting me ever since last night, and this time it's hard to block them out. I’ve realised; when you hear half a story, it becomes really hard not to become invested in it, and equally as tricky to forget about it until your curious mind has heard the missing half.

“I’ll never forget what you did to me, Nichkhun!”

What exactly did Khun do? I put the soft cloth in my hands down and lean them on the top of the bar’s shiny surface, resting all my weight on them. I glance to the side at Ji-eun, who’s busy humming some tune she heard on the radio this morning that I’ve never heard before as she arranges the bottles on the shelf behind us.

“Hey… Can I ask you something?” I say, keeping my voice low as I wonder if Nichkhun can hear me from the kitchen although he’s got the radio on a loud volume, so probably not.

Ji-eun stops moving the beer bottles around, her hand laying rested upon one of them absentmindedly as she nods, “Sure, go ahead.”

I push myself up from the bar, and lean in closer to the younger woman next to me, “There was this strange guy who disturbed myself and Khun last night…” I start. I don’t want to say too much, because I’m not sure how much Ji-eun knows. I suppose she must know something, since he would have been around when they were dating, so I just ask hopefully, “Do you know anything about him?”

Ji-eun's eyes widen, and her brow raises on surprise. She nods her head, slowly, unsurely, as if she shouldn’t be telling me anything. “It’s better if this comes straight from Khun himself, but I know he’ll never tell you.”

She proceeds to fill me in on the gaps in my knowledge, reassuring me that she’s only doing this because I’m his closest friend and she thinks I deserve to know.

“Under no circumstances are you to tell Khunnie that you know this, because I’m the only who does and he’d personally kill me and you if he found out.”

I chuckle at Ji-eun’s bold statement, because knowing Khun, its probably true. I motion for her to continue. She walks around to the other side of the bar and sits down, “You might want to take a seat for this…” she says, patting the stool next to her, “I know exactly who you are talking about. That man is Nichkhun’s ex, Alex Chevalier - he’s a total . He and Khun once had an incredible relationship, and they were even going to get married when suddenly Khunnie broke it off. He has never told anyone why he did that, not even me. Every so often, Alex drops by unannounced. He’s normally drunk, and kicks up a bunch of fuss when he’s about, because he never seems to have moved on. He’s made it his life’s mission to make Khun’s life a complete misery.”

I stare at Ji-eun, my mouth moving but no sound escaping. I’m lost for words, so I just look blankly at the young girl. Eventually, I manage to say, “But Khun told me that this Alex guy broke his heart…”

I’m pondering to myself more than anything, but Ji-eun responds to my statement regardless, “Hm, that’s strange. You’ll have to get that answer straight from Khun, I’m afraid.” She shrugs, slipping out of her seat and rounding the bar to finish off stocking up. I pout, feeling like I’ve just opened up another can of worms rather than solve anything.

'What you did to me…’

The bit about almost getting married, was this what Khun’s ex was referring to?

I think about Khun working all alone in the kitchen, and suddenly I feel a pang of pain in my chest. I’m not entirely sure what’s going on in his world, but I feel like I need to be near him. I can’t help but still have the feeling that Khun is the victim here, considering how his ex-boyfriend seems to be treating him, even if it does turn out that he called the wedding off.

I quickly make my way to the kitchen, still in disbelief about what Ji-eun had told me, and enter whilst attempting to stay cool. It's hard however, to hide the fact that you know someone’s deepest secret, even when you’ve promised you would. I catch his attention with a smile, the same as I normally would, and lean against the door frame, taking in his messy appearance.

His apron and chef’s shirt are covered in flour, and he’s busy kneading some dough for a pastry dish. His hair is even ruffled like he’s run his fingers through it in frustration a few times, and he looks like he's deep in thought. I imagine he’s had just as much thinking as me to do…

“Need any help?” I enquire.. It’s still a bit awkward from this morning, but I persist regardless.

“Sure,” he says curtly. I ask myself how one word can possibly feel hurtful, but somehow it does, since my best friend is practically ignoring me. He instructs me to start chopping some vegetables on the other side of the kitchen, in as few words as possible. I feel like he gave me that task just because it was far away from his position by the stove.

I spend a few minutes doing as he says, a little mad that he’s being so unresponsive all of a sudden, absentmindedly peeling the vegetables on the counter top. My mind wanders, thinking about what he could possibly making since even I haven’t seen this combination before - Khun has pretty much shown me everything else on the menu by now.

It must be a new recipe, I think, pushing down with the knife into a mockingly brightly coloured carrot. Well, I thought it was the carrot anyway, but apparently not, as I let out a yelp as a searing pain went through my finger.

I drop the knife quickly, and it lands on the chopping board with a clatter as I jump backwards, clutching my hand protectively. From my peripheral vision, I see Khun’s head whip around in surprise.

“Youngie?” He asks, hurrying over to my side. He reaches for my hand, realising what I’ve just done, and I reach out to let him see.

So this is what it takes for him to actually acknowledge me, huh? I internally laugh, metaphorically rolling my eyes at my own dry sense of humor. He takes my hand and drags me over to the sink where there’s a basic first aid kit in the cupboard above.

I’m perfectly capable of cleaning my own would - it’s only a small cut, after all - but Nichkhun insists on doing it himself. As he cleans the wound under the tap and applies the plaster to my finger, I swear he makes a point of standing deliberately close to me. I must be imagining that.

“You should be more careful,” he sighs with a frown, shaking his head in pity. I’ve been avoiding his gaze the whole time, thinking about what Ji-eun has told me, and about how I'll probably give the game away if I look towards him. However, I finally look up at his face when he speaks. His mouth is turned down into a frown and the rest of his features look stricken with concern.

“I am, usually,” I point out, and finally, finally he smiles. It's a small one, but a smile nonetheless, and I’m happy to see it.

It’s now that I notice how close our faces are, and my gaze start to trail down his face, watching first his eyes which are still fixed on my hands, and then his pinkish lips which are slightly stretched into a closed-mouth smile. Given his situation, I know I shouldn’t, but I can’t stop myself from thinking about what it would be like to kiss him.

Would it be slow and sensual as he wrapped me in his embrace, and tilted my head back to have better leverage over my mouth? I imagine myself wrapping my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to my body to feel his body heat mingled with mine. Or is he the type of person who's quick and desperate to move along quickly, looking for something deeper and deeper? I decide that either would be fine with me.

I almost get caught up in this fantasy a bit too much, my face becoming a blushing, hot red. However, I manage to stop myself just in time, just before I would have leaned in and captured those perfect lips with my own. Thank goodness for self control, because things could have ended considerably different - and I don't think either of us are really ready for that yet.