ShinB, you've been busy? 

ShinB sees the notification on her lockscreen from an hour ago since the girls were practising. While the group is taking a break, she decides she could deal with the text now. Opening a chat she's been refusing to open since the year began, she releases a sigh and scrolls through the messages she's been missing. 

Let's catch up when we're free! is the first message that ShinB has ignored. It was a reply to her simple Happy New Year unnie :) after the older woman sent her well wishes in a longer, more sincere message: ShinB~ you're an adult now! Don't go around creating trouble though, hehe Happy New Year ShinB yah~

ShinB releases another sigh, this one sounding more excruciating than the one before, as she closes the messaging application and locks her phone screen. 

"Eunbi, what's up?" she hears Umji quietly ask from beside her. 

ShinB, almost going to answer "Nothing" but knows she can't hide anything from her members- much less her same-age member that has been her best friend since debut- shakes her head and says, "Don't worry, I'm fine."

Umji flashes a worried smile as she lightly rubs ShinB's back. "I trust you. But you know we've always got your back right?"

ShinB smiles in gratitude and nods. Maybe the members are enough, ShinB thinks, although she's barely convinced. 

"Yeonhee! You're early," BoA smiles at her best friend as she spots her among the nighttime crowd. 

"Unnie! You're early too," Yeonhee reciprocates the smile. They laugh and exchange a casual hug. 

"I didn't want to stay home alone any longer. Too many crazy feelings," BoA explains herself and released a sigh. 

Yeonhee looks down at the older woman with a slightly troubled expression, and gives BoA a light rub on her arm. 

"Well don't worry Yeonhee yah, I'll tell you about it later," BoA smiles with her reply, to which Yeonhee responds with a nod. "What about you? Why are you early?"

"I was shopping a little for the winter, but it was quicker than I expected," Yeonhee answers with a small chuckle, "so I guess it's the two of us until Ara comes," she adds. 

BoA checks her mobile phone for the time, and with a slightly surprised expression, she says, "We've got about an hour," she chuckles.

"Well that's okay, we haven't met and talked in ages," Yeonhee laughs in her answer.

BoA nods and chuckles. The two make their way to BoA's favourite cozy place- she isn't feeling the alcohol today and wants to stay sober, while the two actresses have schedules the next day and decided against alcohol too. 

As they reach her most frequented cafe, BoA spots a figure she hasn't met for a long time, someone she's been wishing to meet for a while, someone she's been missing and it has been troubling her recently. 

"Ah, ShinB!" BoA delightedly calls out as they approach the cafe where the girl is, in a voice that may have sounded overjoyed with a tinge of relief. 

"ShinB yah, unnie will just get to that store down the road to get a pair of gloves okay?" ShinB snaps out of her daze with Yerin's question.

She could not help it. This was the very street a miracle happened to her, yet a painful memory had followed it. 

"Unnie, you go ahead, there's a cafe around here maybe I'll get a drink," ShinB pushes the sides of her lips into an smile, "you want any?"

The awkward expression irks Yerin, but she decides to ignore it and dismisses it as a cause of the freezing temperatures they are in. It might just be her eyes, Yerin thinks, since she can't see the lower half of ShinB's face through the black mask she's wearing. 

"Nope, I'm fine," Yerin smiles before leaving the younger girl on her own. 

Once alone, ShinB releases a huff that causes her mask to turn slightly damp for an instant. She rubs her palms together. Jittery, she makes her way to the very cafe part of her once swore never to go again, at least for the meanwhile, while the other part yearns for the company she's had there. 

ShinB knows she's just trying her chances of meeting her by going to the cafe. She knows the odds are little, and she knows as well that it won't be a pleasant meeting with the one who's been causing her sorrow and the one she's been turning a cold shoulder to, but her heart yearns to see the very source of warmth that gave ShinB hope and strength when she felt her world was falling apart. 

ShinB feels each step towards the cafe even more painfully. She pulls her coat together and shakes the difficulty off as a result of being out in the cold. But when she spots the very person that has been the cause of her recent heartache, her feet stop. 

"Ah, ShinB!"

Aish, she thinks as her eyes drop,hearing the familiar voice that sends both spikes and warmth to her heart. 

BoA unnie, part of her wants to call out but her lips refuses to move. 

"Ah this is ShinB," she looks up again to find that BoA has got company, "from the girl group GFriend, we got acquainted recently," BoA continues smiling such that it angers ShinB. ShinB doesn't even know why she's furious, but BoA's smile seems to irk her so much that night even though she has missed it because it is exactly BoA that has resulted in ShinB being out of sorts recently. 

"ShinB, this is Yeonhee, the actress Lee Yeonhee," BoA continues to introduce them. 

"Annyeonghaseyo," ShinB greets with a bow. 

Yeonhee reciprocates the courtesy, before prompting, "Would you like to join us for a bit?" 

BoA tenses up, and so does ShinB. Both see the flash of pain in each others eyes.

"No, it's okay," ShinB is first to make the rejection. "I'm just passing by, and I'll get going now," she mumbles her explanation, before giving a quick bow and walking away, leaving a confused Yeonhee and a troubled BoA. 

"Unnie!" BoA's ears pick up the familiar call and she turns around to see ShinB with a taller girl. 

"ShinB yah! I found you," ShinB is beyond relief to find Yerin as soon as she makes her escape. "Let's go, unnie," she tugs on Yerin's arm and the two begin making their way home. 

BoA silently watches the scene and feels as if her heart is beginning to cry. As if hearts have tears, she thinks, but the excruciating pain in her heart leaves her both miserable and confused, clueless about its reasons. 

Yeonhee realises the situation and tugs onto BoA for them to enter the cafe and take a seat. 

"What is actually happening between you two?" Yeonhee asks, straight to the point. 

"What?" BoA is baffled by the question. Feeling attacked, she realises that it's a question she wants to ask ShinB too. 

"You didn't want her to join us, did you? Even though we have some time before Ara comes," Yeonhee continues as if they are in a hearing.

"You realised and yet you asked," BoA's weary voice could not form a question. 

"I realised after asking," Yeonhee reasoned. "So, is that girl the reason for your crazy feelings?"

"I don't know what's going on either. Perhaps I'm just hurt that she hasn't replied my texts since the year started. It's like I'm the only one trying in this friendship," BoA laments, running her fingers through her hair. 

"Maybe she's just busy," Yeonhee says before realising that it's a lame excuse. "You know, the newly-debuted kids are quite controlled," she adds.

"You saw the look in her eyes too, she didn't want to join us too!" BoA exclaims, but keeping her voice unheard by the other guests in the cafe. 

"ShinB yah, you didn't get a drink?" Yerin asks realising that ShinB had come empty-handed. 

"Nope, let's hurry home," ShinB shakes her head, "it's cold," she slurs her words and rubs her arms. 

Yerin chuckles and pats the younger on her head. "You okay, ShinB yah?"

ShinB doesn't feel like lying, so again, she says, "Don't worry unnie," and tries to smile. 

"Okay, I shall not," Yerin decides to trust ShinB.

But with Yerin's response, ShinB feels her heart shatter. ShinB knows she loves her members, that they mean everything to her, but there is a void in her heart that cannot be filled by just her members and ShinB feels terrible for pushing BoA away. 

Willing herself not to cry, she looks down and makes hastier and bigger steps, pulling Yerin on to hurry back to their dorm. 

was travelling for a little and the ideas just flowed in so i got them out! dang i'm travelling a ton these days tho (still irregular updates im sorry yall ㅠㅠ) i seriously can't clearly rmb anymore GFriend/BoA/Lee Yeonhee/Go Ara's schedules were like but im picturing this to be jan 2017. if facts don't match then oh well, it's a fanfic anywayyyy also for buddies who are here who don't know yeonhee or ara well, they're rly close friends of BoA's. they're all under SM (ok update: ara left SM when her contract ended 2 years ago) and they call themselves the cheomdangdong sisters because they all live in that area. i'll also put in my two cents that they're soOOOOPRETTYYYYYYYY bless my eyes ok i'll stop HAHAHA hope you liked the chapter!!! tho it seems a little messy after not writing for ages (yo resident crack shipper got over national exams and graduated yo!!!!!) and cos i was writing this on the go ok wow that was a rly long author's note haha shall stop now~