Soyoon didn’t come to class the next day or the next… or even a week after. Soyoon never skipped class. Even if she were feeling like , she would still come. The first evaluation came up and sadly; the teachers only praised Sinb for the choreography. Sinb tried to tell her that it was mostly Soyoon’s ideas but they quickly brushed off any subject that concerned Soyoon. The others asked Jihae about Soyoon’s situation after passing the first evaluation and the girl just replied saying:

“She told me that she wanted to be a world known dancer before she just… left. So I can only assume that she left the school.”

Ever since Soyoon left, Sinb had been acting colder towards everyone, especially to Umji. Umji kept trying to cheer Sinb up and she tried to get closer to her so it’d be easier to help soothe her, but Sinb hated it and pushed her aside without saying a word. Sinb would rant to Yerin and say that Umji was probably acting like that because now she found an opportunity to get closer to her.

“Right now, I don’t need to make friends to help me, I want to see Soyoon. Why would she leave without saying goodbye to anyone?”

Yerin had to agree, even though she had only known Soyoon for a couple weeks, she didn’t think that Soyoon was the type to just leave. She didn’t even give Jihae a proper farewell. Sinb secluded herself; she didn’t want to see another person’s face. She would walk into her dorm when usually they would all wait for each other to get back before heading to bed. Even though Umji was her roommate, Sinb acted as if no one else was there.

Sowon seemed really concerned for Sinb. She would always try to reach out to her but it would result in a scoff from Sinb.

The day for their final evaluation came up and Soyoon still was absent. The group made backup formations just in case, but they were all hoping that they wouldn’t have to follow through with it. Sinb wouldn’t talk to anyone, and she would glare at anyone who approached her. Yerin probably guessed that it was because they had to go with the plan that Sinb wasn’t really up to doing. Yerin was concerned, though, hopefully, this little phase will pass and Sinb will be back to her own self. She really hated that Sinb was acting this way because of Soyoon.

“Group 5, please enter,” Their teacher called from the room. They all got up, Jihae took a deep breath and Umji looked at the floor and muttered something. She was probably talking to herself to calm her nerves. Since Soyoon was gone, Umji had to take her solo dance part. They all had solos to show off their skill, they considered taking out Soyoon’s solo, but because of the lack of time, they decided to keep it in. It was most convenient to make Umji do it, as she was the closest to where Soyoon was supposed to be.

“Let’s go, guys!” Yerin said to pump everyone up. “Let’s do our best!”

They all nodded except Sinb who was already walking ahead. Yerin let out a loud audible sigh, as she knew that Sinb was still going to give everyone attitude. They all walked in after Sinb and they introduced themselves. The teacher wrote some quick notes down and walked over to the stereo to put on their song. The song started quickly and they started without hesitating. Umji watched the others in the mirror, especially Sinb. She noticed that Sinb’s motions were more aggressive than usual as if she were trying to rid her negative feelings through dance. Umji didn’t realize at the time but then the part where Soyoon’s solo started playing. She stumbled but quickly got back into rhythm. Yerin looked over at Sinb through the mirror in front of her and saw that she was extremely pissed. Yerin glared at her through the mirror and Sinb just quietly clicked her tongue in response. The dance finally ended and the teacher gave them small criticism but overall said that they were really good.

The four of them walked out, Jihae and Yerin high-fiving each other as they thought that they did really good. As the two of them talked and celebrated, Sinb sneaked away, not wanting to be in the middle of their annoying behavior. Umji watched Sinb walk away; it was best if she didn’t go. Sinb was clearly pissed about everything that happened today.

Sinb walked out of the building, there was really no use for her to stay there. The only reason why the others were staying was that the teacher was going to tell everyone their grade. Sinb could care less; Yerin would probably tell her later in the day. Sinb walked towards the dorm, she didn’t feel like going to singing class with Yerin. She wanted to cool down first before seeing anyone. She sat down on a bench, the same bench where she and Soyoon last talked. She took a deep breath; she wanted to see Soyoon again. Why would she just leave without telling anyone? She didn’t even tell Jihae, her own roommate. She wanted to work together with Soyoon again; she wanted to dance with her. Sinb slammed her fist down on the bench. Her hand vibrated with the bench. Her hand hurt, maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to let out her anger in a violent manner. Sinb didn’t want to head back to the dorm, after all, she wanted to let out her anger in a way that wouldn’t hurt her. She decided to head back into the dance studio after everyone had left. She decided to make a quick stop in the dorm to get some other material like water, and a small towel for sweat. Sinb headed for the door of her dorm, but as she was opening the door, she collapsed. Her body felt extremely heavy and Sinb was suddenly tired.

“Damn it,” Sinb said, “I didn’t even do anything hard today.”

Her body was exhausted, maybe because of her anger or maybe because of the dancing. It wasn’t even hard so Sinb concluded that she was just fatigued from being angry for the last week. The adrenaline from her anger was probably the reason why she wasn’t tired beforehand. Now since she was cooling down she felt all the previous fatigue that she should’ve felt before. Never the less, Sinb got up and headed out the dorm, she was quite shaky, as her legs have given up on her.

Maybe exercising will help me. Sinb thought.

Dancing would make her forget about her worries and tiredness. She put on a hoodie as the sun was starting to go down, Sinb guessed that she probably wouldn’t be back anytime soon. She had no classes the next day so she could stay as long as she wanted as long as no one kicked her out. She tucked her other items into a bag and then walked out of the dorm.

“Hey have you guys seen Sinb?” Yerin said as everyone was gathered in the lobby of the dorm.

“Not recently…” Sowon said with a hint of concern.

“Umji, was she in her dorm room at all?” Yerin said as she turned to the youngest.

“No, I just got back with Sowon, I haven’t been in the dorm room,” Umji admitted as she looked down.

“She might be in the dorm room,” Eunha said to calm her girlfriend down. “Don’t worry, I’m sure Sinb is independent enough to no get into any trouble.”

“Why else would she skip class?” Yerin asked as she threw up her arms.

“She’s upset…” Yuju said. “If I was upset I’d ditch class. She might just need time alone.”

Yerin sighed, “What is there to be mad at? She’s been acting like such a !”

“Yerin,” Umji said to make her stop, she didn’t want to hear Sinb’s best friend say that about Sinb. “She’s upset about something personal, you can’t call a person a just because you don’t agree with how they cope with their problems... even if it isn't the best way to cope.”

“Umji, I don’t understand you sometimes,” Yerin said as she sighed. “She treats you the worst. Why do you defend her so much?”

“Because I know that she has a reason why," Umji said as she looked down. “I know that Sinb isn’t the kind of person to just be a because why not.”

Yerin sighed for the third time; Eunha patted her back to calm her nerves. Yerin had quite a short temper and Eunha didn’t want Yerin to lose her composure.

“Come on guys, I’m sure that she is probably either in the dorm sleeping or something or walking around trying to calm herself. Let’s not get too worked up on it. Like Umji said; she’s independent enough to be safe.” Eunha said.

Yerin looked at Eunha and then ran her fingers through the smaller girl’s hair.

“Ok,” Yerin said calmly. “It’s getting late, let’s head up and hit the hay.”

They all said their goodbyes and then left each other one by one. Sowon turned to Yuju and told her to go up ahead. Yuju nodded and then headed up with Eunha and Yerin. Sowon stayed behind with Umji.

“So what are you going to do?” Sowon said in a low voice.

“I don’t know…” Umji said as she bit her thumb. “What if… I fail to do it? What would happen? What if this is all for nothing and I just make it worse for her?”

“Then you’ll be getting an earful from the chairwoman.” Sowon said as she made a hateful expression.

“Yeah, I know…” Umji said. “But this was never this hard… usually it was easy, but now its even more complicated. I did something that I wasn’t supposed to do.”

“Did you…”

“Yeah… and I hate myself for it, I already know what’s going to happen but I can’t stop…”  

Sowon was quiet.

“Go, find her.” Sowon said. “Even if it’s going to be painful later on, I want you to be happy. Not just her.”

Umji looked at her and smiled, it was a weird smile that was mixed with happiness and sadness.

“I’m sorry I got you into this.” Sowon said before she stood up, “Come on, you probably will find out where she went.”

Sowon entered the elevator and headed up, she was probably rushing because Yuju was waiting for her.

Umji walked up to her dorm room, she could sense that no one was inside. Of course, Sinb hated her so it was only natural that she wouldn’t want to be in the dorm where Umji has full access.

Yewon think, Umji thought as she bit down on her thumb. Where would she have gone?

Umji sat on her bed and tapped her foot as she was trying to think of places where she could find Sinb. She turned to stand up, then she stopped as she saw the their little beverage fridge was open. Umji thought nothing big of it as their room was usually messy because of Sinb. She closed it and walked into the bathroom. Maybe she’d think better once she was all clean. She walked into the bathroom and started to wash up. She finished washing her face and then tried to find the face towel that was put out earlier in the morning.

That’s strange; I thought I put one out in the morning. Umji thought as she walked over to the cabinet to get another one. She walked out of the bathroom feeling refreshed. She plopped down on her bed and she sighed.

Where could she be? Umji said as she looked up at the celling. Then it hit her.

The fridge was open and the face towel was gone…

Umji ran to her fridge and opened it to see that one of the water bottles was missing.

Sinb didn’t drop off her bag and a water bottle and towel are gone…

Umji realized that no one else could’ve come in and that the towel and water bottle didn’t just disappear.

She’s still at the dance studio?

Sinb blasted music through her phone; she didn’t want to hear anything else besides the songs and the sound of her feet hitting the floor. She put no limit on how furiously she was dancing. She suddenly stumbled over her own foot; she fell to the floor, as she didn’t have the strength to get back up.

“Damn it!” Sinb yelled as she slammed her fist against the ground. Why was she so clumsy? She was getting more and more fatigued with ever second… Sinb shook her head as she was starting to see stars. She got up and continued to dance, this time, less energetic than before.

“This is where you were,” Umji said.

Sinb jumped a little, she didn’t think that anyone would be trying to find her. She turned around begrudgingly as she didn’t want to see Umji. She was pissed and she didn’t really want to see a person that would piss her off even more.

“What do you want,” Sinb said, not addressing Umji by her name.

“What’s wrong with you?” Umji asked again. “Why are you still here? You haven’t been acting like yourself,”

“What do you mean? Is it bad that I want to stay here?” Sinb said, then she shook her head. “And how would you know how I usually act? You don't even know me. Stop trying to act like you’re a my friend, stop pretending to be perfect,”

Umji was thrown back by that comment, “Sinb, how did you come to that conclusion? I know that I’m not perfect…”

“Then why are you so eager to become someone in my life?” Sinb spat.

“Sinb-“

“Did you think kindness would make me like you?” Sinb said angrily. She opened to say another thing, as she needed to get it out of her system. “Why do you think it’s fine to just take Soyoon’s spot? Were you trying to impress me? Did you want to get my attention?”

Of course she was still caught up on that, Umji scrunched her eyebrows.

“I would never-“

“I saw you mess up while you were fawning all over me. You can’t even compare to Soyoon.” Sinb clenched her fist, her nails dug into her own palm.

“Sinb! I wasn’t checking you out or anything! I was concerned for you! Plus why are you changing the topic! I came to talk about you!” Umji raised her voice. She surprised herself as how mad she was getting.

“Why! Why do you care about me so much!” Sinb was practically shrieking.

“It’s because I love you!” Umji yelled back. She bit her lip to prevent her from saying anything else, but she couldn’t control it any longer. “You know how hard it is for me to love you! I want to make you happy! I want your life to be worthwhile with me next to you!” She felt her eyes stung from tears that were soon rolling down her face.

“Save it…” Sinb said with a cold tone. “I only cared for one person, and now she is gone.”

Umji knew that Sinb wouldn’t accept her feelings; she knew that Sinb had a thing for Soyoon. Even so, she still had to try. But she knew since now Soyoon was gone, Sinb’s heart went along with her.

“Why does it need to be her?” Umji said, this was a line she had rehearsed many times before. But for some reason, this time it felt real. “I care for you so much! My heart hurts at the thought of you hating me. I’m not doing anything to impress you; I’m not trying to do anything to make myself seem perfect. I’m doing this for you! I’m doing everything for you!”

Sinb scoffed, “Doesn’t that just contradict what you just said? You’re doing everything for me but not at the same time?”

“You don’t understand, you won’t ever understand.” Umji said as more tears fell from her eyes. “Not until the very end.”

Sinb walked up to Umji, she was utterly disgusted. She grabbed the girl by the collar of her shirt.

“Then why don’t make me understand.” Sinb yelled. She was so frustrated; Umji’s words didn’t make any sense.

Umji shoved Sinb off of her, her anger reaching at its peak. Sinb fell to the floor, her body weak from yelling and practicing earlier. Umji looked down at her in horror.

“I’m sorry…” Umji said as she bit her thumb. “I didn’t mean to-“

“Just shut up!” Sinb said as her fingernails dug deeper into her palm. She felt something wet trickle down her hand. She looked down at her hand to see that it was blood. She cursed at herself and kept her gaze on the ground. “I’m getting sick of hearing your goofy-two-shoes voice!”

“Sinb, I’m sorry for pushing you but what’s wrong with you? You need to stop! Where is the bright and happy Sinb that we all know and love!” Umji said as she walked towards Sinb

“Tell me, have you ever experienced losing someone you love?” Sinb said in a low voice. “Have you?”

The question caught Umji off guard. She stayed quiet. Her mood shifted from anger to somber.

“Soyoon just left me…” Sinb said as she trembled. She was holding back tears. “She told me she loved me. I loved her back. We were supposed to be together… We were going to become professionals together. Tell me, what’s wrong with me. Is it wrong to feel this way because I lost someone I loved? She just disappeared, she could be anywhere, but the only thing I know is that she isn’t here with me.”

“Sinb… I don’t disagree with you but I don’t completely agree with you.” Umji said as she crouched down and wiped the tears off of Sinb’s face. “It’s not wrong to feel sad about them leaving without telling you but it’s not right to take your anger out on others.”

“That’s easy for you to say… You never had someone you loved the way I cared for Soyoon,” Sinb said as she slapped Umji’s hand off of her face. “Don’t act like you completely understand how I feel…”

"We're more similar than you know..." Umji said as she looked down. "But please, you don't want to go down this path full of spite. It won't make anyone happy and it'll make your life a living hell."

Sinb looked at Umji in confusion and rage, why would she say these things?

“I'm a scum, and I don't have a right to be talking to you. But now I can change that, I want to change that.” Umji said, as she looked deep into Sinb’s eyes. “I don’t want to regret and I don’t want you to regret either.”

“I’d be regretting nothing.” Sinb said as she looked away from Umji’s eyes. They looked pure and sincere; it hurt Sinb to look at Umji.

Sinb stood up and pushed past Umji without looking back. She wiped her face; she completely didn’t know why she was crying. She tried to convince herself that it was because of Soyoon. Or maybe it was because of her anger. But in the end she cried because of Umji. She couldn’t explain why, she wanted to go back and say sorry; she wanted to somehow find a way to get this feeling off her chest. But at the same time she didn’t want to look back, all because of that feeling that was gripping her heart so tight it hurt.

Sinb barely took another step before collapsing. She heard footsteps from behind her.

Dammit, I don’t want help from you Umji… please I don’t want you to see me like this…

“I’m so sorry…”

SOOOOOOOO FINALLY BACK WITH A NEW CHAPTERRRR

sorry, it's been a long time since I last updated...

I'm a lazy child... (sorry that this chapter ain't as long as the others....)

but I hope you enjoy this chapter! 

If you felt some sort of emotion while reading this then tell me! I would love to hear what you guys have to say. 

I know there might be parts where you go like "wait... what?" and I want you to think that. (Not all the time tho...)

Anyways subscribe and/or upvote if you enjoyed this chapter and I hope to see you guys soon!

(if you guys didn't know, umji means thumb and Sinb means mystery. Hence the title)