Haein was waiting in Yewon’s room when Yewon returned. Haein helped Yewon sit down to rest her foot and curiously asked where she had been this morning.

"I was with Seungcheol," Yewon replied.

Haein raised an eyebrow with a knowing smile on her face. "Did you..."

"Yes," Yewon admitted timidly.

"Congratulations, your highness," Haein bowed to her, looking happy. “How do you feel?”

Yewon shrugged.

“If you need to talk to anyone about it; I’m always here,” Haein told her, and Yewon nodded. Haein didn’t say anything more about that, and instead began the usual routine to bathe her and dress her.

As Haein was working around her, Yewon remembered that she did have something to ask her maid. The question had been in the back of her mind ever since Seungyeon asked it, and she wanted to finally get an answer.

“Haein, I do have a question for you.”

“Anything, your highness,” Haein replied.

“Why did you demote yourself? You’re a scribe, right? Why would you voluntarily become a maid?”

“It’s because Wonwoo asked me to,” she replied as she pulled the dress over Yewon’s head. “Because he wanted someone he could trust to take care of you and not another hateful Solenese woman. I agreed because I also wanted to take care of you, because as you know, I didn’t believe in the war, and you were here representing the end of it. The end of the war something I passionately want, and that why I stepped forward to be your maid. And I don’t think of it as a demotion. On the contrary, I have been honored to serve you, your highness.”

Yewon blushed and nodded. Truly, she thought, there was nothing suspicious about Haein. While everyone else around her, from the kitchen boy to her own husband, closed themselves off and seemed to have something to hide, Haein was like an open book. Anything that Yewon had ever asked, Haein would answer without holding back. Even when Haein was asked about her night with Soonyoung, Haein readily revealed the embarrassing details.

But although Haein seemed to have so few secrets and nothing to hide, Yewon realized that she did not know much about Haein at all. She knew little about her family, her life and her background. Suddenly curious about that, she asked Haein to tell her more about herself.

Haein was born in a small town far from the capital. She had four older brothers, and her mother passed away giving birth to her. She was therefore raised in a family of men with very little feminine presence besides her two aunts.

Her father was an erudite man who owned the town’s small library. In accordance with the family business, all of her brothers learned to read, and so she naturally followed suit and learned to read as well when it was custom for women to learn housework instead of getting educated. She loved it, and by the time she was only 20 years old, she had read every single book in her town’s library and began to scribe them for book merchants.

One of the merchants who did come to this library was Wonwoo, Haein revealed. “It was Wonwoo who recruited me to work in the palace library. He thought I was wasting my intellect working in the small town, and so I was brought in as a royal scribe.”

Yewon had always known that Haein was intelligent: Haein had figured out who it was the delivered the sweet bread just from the mark on the seals; she had also figured out what the King had planned between Yewon and Soonyoung through her own intuition. However, Yewon had realized that she had vastly overlooked that trait in Haein. If Haein was intelligent enough to be recruited from a small town to work in the palace, then she must be very special.

“Do you miss them? Your family?” Yewon asked.

Haein nodded. “Only two of my brothers are still alive,” she revealed. “I lost the other two because of the war.”

“I’m sorry,” Yewon answered.

“Don’t be, your highness. It wasn’t even your people who killed them.”

“What?”

“They died because of the war, not in the war. For one of them: there weren’t enough horses, and so the able-bodied soldiers had to walk. My brother was one of them, and he died of exhaustion on the way to the battlefield.” She looked distressed by that memory, but then gulped and carried on: “The other one, the youngest one and the closest one to me, was so scared of fighting that he ran away. He was killed for cowardice by a war general,” her voice trailed off.

“I’m so sorry. Both incidents were such a waste of life,” Yewon said as she placed a comforting hand on Haein’s arm.

“War is a waste of life, your highness. The deaths of my brothers made me so passionately against this war, and so when I heard that you’ll be married to our prince, I was so relieved because I thought it was the end of all this wasteful death. But sadly, it wasn’t...”

“It is now,” Yewon assured her, though even she wasn’t so sure about that, but she wanted to say something to comfort Haein.

“I really do hope so,” Haein replied.

-

When she was dressed and bathed and her bandages were changed, Yewon made her way to the dining room for the first breakfast since she came back. She was very late because of the time she spent with Seungcheol before morning, but her hunger made her eager to go despite the fact everyone would mostly be done eating anyways.

She entered and bowed to the King and Queen sitting at the table and when she lifted her head, she was met with the sight of Seokmin standing and serving the table. She smiled when she saw him and also bowed her head to him to greet him. He looked unsettled by that and quickly averted his eyes and continued serving. She decided to speak with him later; he clearly was uncomfortable being spotlighted in front of the royal family.

Seokmin, however, was not the only one who was unsettled when she came in. Soonyoung, too, seemed to be trying to avoid eye contact, freezing especially when she took the empty chair beside him and in front of where Seungcheol was seated. She was not there for five seconds when Soonyoung stood up and excused himself, saying that he was done eating and had work to do.

Yewon noted the curious expression on Seungcheol’s face when Soonyoung left. Indeed, it was curious. Soonyoung had always been one of the last ones out of the dining room. Even when he was finished eating, Soonyoung would rather remain in the company of his family or the kitchen staff than go off on his own. He was a person who loved company no matter what, and so it was understandable that Seungcheol would be confused by Soonyoung’s actions.

Yewon was not confused: she knew that Soonyoung wanted to avoid her, and she knew that he left because of her. She grunted internally; she wished that he wouldn’t make it so obvious. She couldn’t bear the thought of Seungcheol getting suspicious and asking her why Soonyoung was avoiding her. Yewon knew she wouldn’t be able to lie to him if he confronted her like that.

Seokmin came from behind her and poured soup into her bowl. Yewon noted that his hands were shaking as he poured it, and she could hear that his breath was growing louder.

“Are you okay, Seokmin?” Yewon asked him softly. She hadn’t wanted to spotlight him, but she couldn’t just ignore him when he was trembling like that.

 “I’m okay,” he answered. “Please don’t worry about me, your highness.” He sounded like he was out of breath, but trying his best to hide it. He was trying so hard to not make a spectacle of himself, but everyone was now gazing at him. He put the pot of soup down on the table, bowed to everyone, and said he would send someone else to serve them.

Yewon watched as he left. He was more uneasy than usual.

She wondered what had happened to him in the time she was gone. The last time she had seen him was when he begged her to run away and hide, but she refused and instead cooperated with the King of Solen. She wondered if he got in trouble or if he was punished for that. The thought made her feel a heavy weight of guilt in the pit of her stomach, and she lost her appetite despite how hungry she had been before.

“That is the same servant boy that couldn’t breathe a while back, right?” the Queen asked.

“Yeah, it’s Seokminnie,” Yulhee replied to her mother. “He told me he always does that when he’s around Princess Yewon, because she makes him nervous.”

“If he can’t get himself together in front of a royal family member, he should be dismissed,” the Queen announced to the serving butler who was standing at the side.

Just as the butler was about to respond, Yewon quickly interrupted and said, “please don’t.” She knew she sounded desperate, and she was. She understood that being dismissed would lead to more beatings and maybe even the killing of Seokmin.

“But Princess, he’s incompetent,” the Queen argued.

“Please, your majesty,” she said, bowing her head with an earnest look in her eyes.

“He’ll stay,” the King butted in before the Queen could respond. “We owe Princess Yewon,” the King said, “and the least we can do is keep her servant friend around.”

-

It was hard to enjoy finally having a proper meal after many weeks when she was occupied with worry for Seokmin all of the sudden. She realized that he had rarely crossed her mind in the time she was in Galacia. She didn’t think to talk to her father about how the other spies beat and hurt him. She didn’t think about what had probably happened to him in her absence.

She wanted to speak with him, and so she called for him to come to her room. The guard who was tasked with fetching Seokmin came back to tell Yewon that he was not in his room nor in the kitchens.

“I’ll bring him to you when I find him, your highness,” the guard promised.

Unable to sit with her own thoughts for too long or else she would be consumed with negative energy, she found herself craving company, one person’s company in particular.

She dragged herself through the halls toward where Wonwoo was. She recalled that she still had some unanswered questions to settle with him as well, and she also was concerned about how he was doing.

She found him reading, of course. Yewon always thought that the sight of him reading was a pleasant one, for it suggested that everything was normal, and that he was okay.

“Don’t you have any friends?” Yewon teased as she entered and peered at the pile of books beside him.

He looked up from his book and smiled when he saw her. “Besides you, not really.”

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

“Well, the spasms of pain are less severe today,” he answered. “How did your confrontation with Seungcheol go?” he asked as he marked his page and put the book to his side.

Last time she had left him mid-conversation to go after her husband who had been giving her the cold shoulder. “We resolved some issues,” Yewon answered. “And speaking of Seungcheol, he told me something that I want to ask you about. Seungcheol knows about the time we secretly met. He said that you told him.”

The bright expression on Wonwoo’s face faded. He bit his lower lip and averted his eyes to avoid hers. “I did,” he confessed. “I was so angry with him before he launched the battle, and I wanted to provoke him, so I spilled it. I was wrong, I’m sorry. But Yewon, I was so angry with him for what he was putting our men through. His pride and his selfishness and his thirst for revenge for Jeonghan were all getting in the way of his rationality and he still wanted to launch the attack. And I was so angry with him, I blurted it out. I told him I met you behind his back, and that we kissed. Please know that telling him this was an outburst on my part; I wasn’t trying to sabotage your relationship with him. I wasn’t thinking, and I’m sorry.”

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier about this?” Yewon asked him.

“Because I was afraid of what you would think…”

“The fact you didn’t tell me puts you in a much worse position, you know,” Yewon replied.

“I know,” Wonwoo said with a nod. “I apologize. I don’t know what else to say.”

“The more I learn about you, the more mysterious you become to me,” Yewon thought out loud. “You hide so much from me, don’t you?”

It was true that Wonwoo was a mystery. She remembered when she first met him, he was a charming, perfect, pure prince. He had all the qualities she had ever dreamed of in a man: well-read, intelligent, sweet and considerate. But the more she knew him, the more layers of him she was able to uncover. He wasn’t as flawless­ as he first appeared– far from it. He was a very secretive person. She recalled all of thing important things that he hid from her: the fact he was engaged, how he had only pretended to care about her in the beginning, and now, how he had blurted out a secret just to provoke Seungcheol. There was so much that he hid from her, and Yewon felt that there was so much more he was hiding.

She couldn’t believe that he was faking his personality. He was indeed a kind person with sweet words, but his fatal flaw was this dishonest secrecy, and it made her uneasy.

“To be honest, this secrecy of yours makes it harder for me to trust you,” Yewon said calmly. She was not angry with him or anything, just disappointed. She really wanted to trust him; he meant a lot to her after all.

But Wonwoo’s face fell when he heard those words, and he looked hurt and heartbroken. “It feels like I’m losing you already,” he said with a regretful look on his face. “I’m sorry for hiding it from you,” he apologized again. “I want to share everything with you, Yewon. I love you, and I want you to know all of me. I don’t want to keep secrets from you, but it takes time for someone to open up like that. Even though I love you, I can’t seem to be honest with you because I’m afraid of losing you.”

Then there was a knock on the door, interrupting the conversation. The door opened to reveal the King, who looked surprised but pleased to see Yewon there, “my dear, you’re here! Checking up on our Wonwoo, I see.”

“Yes, your majesty,” she bowed her head to him.

“How are you, son?” the King asked Wonwoo, walking towards him.

“Your majesty, it’s good to see you again,” Wonwoo told his father, who was eying the wound on Wonwoo’s chest.

“I was very worried about you when I figured out you were prisoner. Thankfully, Princess Yewon got you out, and thankfully they never figured out you were my son. God knows they would have bargained with you if they found out.”

“Speaking of that, your majesty, I have something important to discuss with you,” Wonwoo told his father. “About the hostages, you need to get them out. They’re suffering too much at the enemy’s hands.”

“Galacia’s not going to just give them to us, son,” the King said. “The hostages are as good as gone now. We can’t afford to ransom them or make any deal to get them back.”

“What do you mean you can’t afford to ransom them? You have tons of money…”

“They’re not worth it.”

“They’re your people!” Wonwoo raised his voice and looked angry all of the sudden, which in turn, provoked the King.

“Don’t raise your voice over mine,” the King said with a frown on his face. “And yes they’re my people, and so is everyone else in my country. Giving Galacia money would only mean worse things for Solen. More soldiers will be mobilized against us with that money, don’t you understand?”

“Then don’t give them money. Give them land or something,” Wonwoo suggested.

“You’re an idealist, son. You’ve always been an idealist,” the King said.

“Why not give them land?”

“Because people died for the land, Wonwoo! We’re not going to give up what our people died fighting for!”

“Those people are dead now, but the hostages are alive–”

“Wonwoo, please! I came here to see how my son was doing, not to have a political debate.”

Wonwoo fell silent at that, but he still looked aggravated by the King’s unwillingness to rescue the hostages. Yewon also felt upset. Having been in the dungeons and having seen the condition of those prisoners, it hurt to think that their king had no thoughts of protecting them. She wanted to speak up and back Wonwoo up, but felt it wasn’t her place.

-

Her time to speak up did come a few hours later. She was asked to the courts in which she sat in a private meeting among the King, Queen, Seungcheol and other select high-ranking noblemen, in which they would decide their course of action against the threat of Galacia.

“Appeal for peace,” was the King’s suggestion. No one in the room disagreed. Solen could do nothing else but that, because to continue to fight would certainly mean Solen would lose, especially giving the potential military alliance with China.

“They’re not going to agree to peace so easily if they’re on the verge of winning the war,” one the noblemen noted. He had a long beard and round eyes that made him look like a hawk.

“Yes, we need to give them incentive to surrender and stop fighting us,” another stated, the one named Arti with whom she was familiar.

“Threaten them with her life,” the bearded man said as he pointed towards her, making her freeze and feel afraid. “She’s the only thing we have that they hold dear,” he added.

“Of course not!” the King shut the suggestion down quickly. “I will not put our Princess Yewon in that position. Besides, threatening the enemy will only encourage them to attack and destroy us. We are in no position to threaten them.”

“But with all due respect your majesty, by not threatening them, nothing will preempt them from destroying us. We have to play our cards right here,” the bearded man argued. Yewon averted her eyes to the floor, feeling insecure all of the sudden. The bearded man wanted to place her in the crossfire, in which her life was used as a bargain. She gulped and found herself folding into her own body as she listened to these men decide her fate.

Seungcheol, who had been sitting quietly beside his lifted his head and stated: “Princess Yewon will not be harmed in all of this,” he said almost gravely, “and anyone who even offers such an outrageous suggestion should be punished.” He glared at the bearded man threateningly, who flinched and fell silent.

That made Yewon feel just slightly better about her prospects, she was happy that he came to her defense like that, but still, it was hard not to feel uneasy.

“I say we offer them land in exchange for their promise to cease the fighting. That could be the incentive,” another one of the men in the room said.

“I think that’s a terrible idea,” the bearded man said. “What if they take the land and still attack?”

The men thus got into an argument. Yewon liked that idea, and was disappointed to see that Seungcheol was against it. Like his father, he used the argument that people died to attain that land for Solen. To give it away would be to dishonor them and render their deaths vain.

Eventually, the King was convinced that offering land was the best way to move forward, and so a they began drafting the decree to send to her father.

“I still think we need to give some kind of threat,” the bearded men suggested again. “Offer them land, but don’t give them the satisfaction of thinking we’ve completely surrendered to them. They will take advantage of us, your highness. Please consider what I’m saying…”

Yewon hated to admit it, but the bearded man did have a legitimate concern in this. There was something missing from this political decree, a semblance of a threat that would assert some authority. Otherwise the decree sounded like a surrender, like Solen was begging Galacia to stop fighting them. It would not give Galacia enough incentive to simply accept the offer and move on.

Yewon imagined Jihoon reading such a decree. He would only laugh at it, she imagined. He would not accept it, and instead send it back to ask for more land and threaten Solen. The draft decree was simply too weak as it was.

“What do you suggest then?” Seungcheol asked the bearded man. “We don’t have anything against them but their princess, and hurting her is out of the question.”

“Well, we have to think of something else,” the bearded man said. “And it has to be serious enough for them to feel our resolution, but not serious enough to provoke them into waging revenge war against us.”

It was then that an idea came to Yewon as she pondered on the words of the bearded man. At first she hesitated to suggest it, because she realized that she would be sacrificing something to help Solen against her own country. The hesitation did not last long however; she was willing to make the sacrifice if it made the prospect of ending the war even a little more likely.

And so, Yewon spoke up for the first time in that meeting: “may suggest something...”

“Please, my dear,” the King answered and beckoned for her to speak.

“Cut my hair and send it to my father.”

-

Living in two very different countries made Yewon appreciate the nuances of cultural difference that most people would not recognize. The men in that courtroom could have never come up with the idea of cutting her hair, because they were unaware of what it meant to cut her hair in Galacia.

In Solen, women tie their hair up in a bun, and so the length of their hair is not outwardly visible to others in public. In Galacia, women let their hair down. It was part of the modesty which was an essential virtue for Galacian women; their long hair would cover their neck, arms and shoulders. To tie their hair up would be a sign of immodesty in Galacia, and a woman who does it is frowned upon. For a woman to cut her hair short in Galacia is nearly unthinkable, for the length of a woman’s hair in Galacia represents her identity as a woman and her virtue.

But, at the end of the day, her hair was just hair; her father would not wage war over hair. Cutting her hair would just make him understand that Solen will not be docile in face of their peril. At the same time, it would show him that Solen has no intention of harming his daughter, but would have no problem shaving her head completely if no agreement is settled. It would make her father feel threatened enough to take the decree seriously, but not threatened enough retaliate against it.

When Yewon explained it to the men in the courtroom, many seemed fond of the idea, including the bearded man. The King, too, said it was a brilliant and lauded Yewon for the sacrifice she was willing to make for Solen.

Seungcheol, however, protested. “No need to cut your hair. We’ll find another woman’s hair and pass it off as yours.”

“My father will know,” Yewon replied. “It’s better not to take that chance.”

“You shouldn’t have to lose your hair for this,” Seungcheol muttered. He looked so much more bothered than she did by this idea. She figured that perhaps it had to do with honor; even though hair was not as essential in Solenese culture, noble women still did not cut their hair short. It was simply part of being a woman to have long hair, and Yewon felt that Seungcheol was uncomfortable with the idea of his wife and the future queen let go of that.

Yewon insisted to have it cut. He protested a little more, but eventually, the King made the final decision, and her hair was to be cut immediately so that the decree would be sent right after.

A maid was called on to braid Yewon’s hair, and when that was done, she was sent to another room where the King’s hairdresser was waiting for her.

She was not reluctant to cut her hair; it was not something she ever cared that much about, and she also never internalized the idea of hair being a symbol of virtue. It did not trouble her much to cut it, especially when she considered the larger scheme of things.

However, the hairdresser was hesitant to run his razor through her hair.

“Are you sure, your highness?” the hairdresser asked as he pointed towards the length of her braid.

The more the barber stalled, the more anxious Yewon got about her lack of concern. Was she supposed to feel unsure? Was she supposed to feel attached to her hair? Was she supposed to care as much as the hairdresser seemed to expect her to care?

Finally, the hairdresser went ahead and cut the braid, and she felt a heavy weight fall from her head. What remained of her hair was too short to be tied, but just long enough to cover her ears and part of her neck.

It was only when she looked in the mirror after the haircut that a dreadful sense of loss overcame her; her hair was gone, something she had spent years growing. She looked so different now, and almost felt like a changed person.

The hairdresser was the first to examine her with the new hair, and he seemed to wince slightly, clearly not liking it.

And when she walked through the halls, she would catch people’s eyes. Their expressions showed surprise, disbelief and some even looked repulsed. The more she studied others’ expressions, the more insecure she felt, and the more she found herself regretting it.

She tried to shake away those negative thoughts. It wouldn’t help her to feel sad over her hair now. Right now, all she should be concerned about is the good of the country and the end of the war. Her hair was such a trivial concern in the face of it all. She held her chest high and prepared to enter the courtroom to present her cut hair to the King.

A/N: OKAY I KNOW I’M VERY LATE, BUT I HAVE EXCUSES I WILL LIST THEM FOR YOU:

1) my main excuse is that I’m fasting these days and it’s sooooooo hard for me to write when I’m hungry like I can’t concentrate at all ;;

2) remember when I told you that I had a plan for this story? Well as I kind of strayed from the original plan and so it came to the point where I had to sit down and rethink and replan everything, and that took many many hours of careful consideration and thought and note-taking but I finally came up with a revised plan

3) this chapter is long and it took a while to complete ;;

anyways im truly sorry if it was boring and too political. I’m also sorry for the lateness. I always feel bad that I’m not keeping my promises to you guys im sorryyyy ;;

I’ll do better next time!