Immature love says, "I love you because I need you." Mature love says, "I need you because I love you."
 Erich Fromm -

5 March 2015

Jessica stirred in her sleep after hearing a rhythm of knocks coming from her door. She groaned and pulled her blankets over her face in the hope that the noise would just go away on its own. As the knocks became more consistent she growled to herself then rose her body up from her bed and headed towards the door. In the back of her mind she was going to kill whoever had the nerve to wake her up at 9 in the morning on a Saturday.

Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but she had made a habit out of getting up at 12 because Saturday was declared official lazy or hang loose day in her eyes, which earn her the nickname "Lazy Pants" by her sister and friends. Jessica unlocked her door and saw a familiar face.

James was wearing a sleeves Nike sport shirt and sport pants, and was holding a Adidas sport bag on his right hand, probably getting back from a intense workout at the gym. He was still sweating and his sport shirt was drenched with water, which made his abs transparent to Jessica.

She was using all of her willpower in her body and eyes to not look down at those beautiful abs and delicious biceps. Her hands muffled around with her hair which looked like a mess as he smiled at her.

"Hey sleeping beauty."

"Go away James…today was supposed to be the day I sleep in. What's wrong with you? First yesterday, and now today?"

Jessica was never a morning person and at times she could become quite cranky. James knew this well which is why she was surprised he had the nerve to show up out of the blue. She wasn't surprise if someone calls her during her beauty sleep, but to show up at her doorstep, that was a different case.

"I thought you'd like to come have breakfast with me."

"Go out to eat?"

"No, of course not. I already made up some stuff."

"But I thought you went to the gym?"

"An hour ago, I spend the rest cooking the food."

Jessica sighed.

"Go figure, you never want to go out to eat but usually you don't cook. Did something good happen to you?”

"Nothing in particular really. I just wanted to see,"

Jessica cocked an eyebrow.

"See what?"

"See if you were okay. I kind of left you in a hurry to talk to the giant, Kris."

Jessica recalled yesterday when James and her came close to kissing. She didn't want to think about it at all for she was already distraught about the moment through the night. It took her to use one hour of Baekhyun time to get him out of her mind last night, but now it seems that karma had a funny way of bringing it back to full circle. Always a , Karma is.

"I'm fine. It sounded serious anyway so no biggie."

"Will you come over?"

"Yeah just give me five minutes and I'll be right over."

"I'm sorry I woke you up."

Jessica smiled at him brightly.

"Like I said yesterday, it's okay. As long as the breakfast you made is good we will call it even.

"You are threatening me?"

"Just a little."

Jessica shut the door and headed to the bathroom to brush her hair and do her morning routine.

James walked back to his apartment to get himself cleaned up before he got the kitchen table ready for the two of them. He hadn't had breakfast with Jessica since he took care of her when she was sick back when he first debuted in 2010. It brought up some good feelings despite the fear that lingered in the back of his mind.

He doesn't know if he should confess to her later or never. Kris was right, he still has feelings for the beautiful ice princess, and as much as he kept on throwing all of those feelings out of his heart, it would just enter right back. He doesn't know how much more can he take before he just slam her to the wall and begin to kiss her on the lips, down to her chin, then to her neck, th-

"Hey Oppa I'm here!"

He snapped out of his dirty thoughts and hit his forehead lightly.

"Stop being a ert Dongchul."

He then returned his focus to Jessica who was wearing a white t-shirt and light blue jeans. She also wasn't using any make up, and to James, she was still looking like a beautiful goddess that fell from heaven.

"Food is already on the table, c'mon inside!"

Jessica came more into the room and the aroma of breakfast hit her nostrils faster than a bullet flying through a gun. She was practically speechless as she found her body almost levitating towards the table with all the food, especially the bacon.

"I didn't think you could cook!"

James shook his head at her.

"I'll take that as a compliment. Go ahead and have a seat. You want anything to drink?"

"Orange juice if you have any."

James tensed a bit and remembered he drank the whole bottle to get through an alcohol crave. He quickly searched through the fridge for something else she might like.

"We're out of orange juice. I have milk and tea though. Will those work for you?"

Jessica nodded at him and James got them both a glass of milk. He smiled at her as he handed her one of the glasses. He then took a seat across from her and they began to eat. It was quiet for some time until Jessica cleared after drinking up all the contents in her glass.

"You really outdid yourself Dongchul Oppa."

James looked up from his plate and smirked.

"I better have. It took me almost the entire hour to get everything ready for the both of us."

"Why go through the trouble?"

"We haven't eaten breakfast together in a while. Besides, Krystal isn't around to help you go buy food and hell no I'm gonna let you eat takeout food again, you been eating those craps for weeks. And well.......It's nice to have someone in the morning to t- Hey! That's the last of the bacon!"

Jessica began to chew on the delicious piece of fried meat as she stuck out her tongue to tease James.

"Well I am your guest and the host typically lets the guest get the final piece of bacon."

James groaned a bit and laughed.

"That isn't true. You just pulled that out of your as a guilt trip to justify you taking the piece."

"If you really are that mad at me I could just leave."

"No!"

Jessica was baffled and shocked that James sounded so angry right then.

'What's up with him?'

Jessica thought.

James caught himself however and sighed while getting his emotions in check.

'Watch your temper Dongchul......Don't want her to know about your feelings, do you?'

"I was hoping we could spend the day together. I.....I don't want you to leave Jessica."

She could feel the sadness in his voice. It was almost as if James was afraid to lose or to be alone. She deduced it was probably because of his alcoholism and that he needed a friend to get over it.

‘I’m schedule free today, and Tyler is in Hong Kong doing his business.......What the hell, Oppa need’s a friend today.”

Jessica looked up at James with a concerned look and smiled slightly trying to even things up.

"Well what did you have in mind?"

"Well......We could go f-for walk in the park for a while to get out of our apartments and talk. And maybe....go watch a movie or something, I guess?"

"That sounds great actually."

Jessica was overjoyed inside to hear James speak of this. Usually when they'd end up talking it would be deep and personal. She hoped that he would bring up some of his problems and that she could try to help him through it. Jessica was not one for drama but when James kept secrets from her especially ones about himself, all she wanted to do was help him heal.

After they finished up eating they tossed their dishes into the sink and grabbed their coats and headed outside. They weren't wearing any disguises to cover their face as James said he didn't want to ruin his pride as the "Scandal King", and force Jessica to not use anything even though she was begging him like a kid who begs his mother to buy him a toy, and James found it cute. So after half and hour of begging, Jessica finally gave up and warn him if anything happens to her, Hellsica will be released.

It took them both about 15 minutes before they reached the park and it was quite beautiful this day. It had been raining for the last week with sunshine on and off so it was nice to finally feel the sun fully out and about. Jessica kept close to James though as she wasn't familiar with the area they were going to. True, she had lived in the area for quite some time but with her depression all she wanted to do was hide from the world. Jessica couldn't help but stare at James from time to time as they entered the park area. His bomber jacket complimented his body in almost every way. In her eyes he looked y and calm.

'Stop thinking about him like that, you pabo!'

They were surprisingly many people at the park on a Saturday morning, and most of them noticed and began to take pictures of them. Cameras were flashing, screams were heard and questions were being thrown at them in the same time. Jessica went closer to James when she saw some fans looking at her with hatred in their eyes. She still wasn’t use to have her privacy getting ruined by the fans and media.

James seemed to notice it and wrapped her hand around her waist. He could feel his heart racing and threatening to explode while Jessica was looking down to the ground to cover her red cheeks which were blushing.

“So.....How’s you fashion business? I heard from the news that you are going to open shop in Malaysia and Singapore.”

James said as he tried to break the silence between them. Jessica, who was still looking down trying to avoid the eyes of the rest of the fans, was taken back as she cleared .

“Yeah, I am going to Singapore next week to promote the fashion line at Marina Bay with a new assistant that Tyler assigned to me. But seriously, I think you could have done a better job at picking a therapist out of me. The guy is super annoying.”

“Heh, he sounds like a charmer Jess.”

Jessica stopped walking for a bit and when James realized she wasn’t by his side he turned and face her.

“What’s wrong Jessica?”James asked as he ignored the questioned that were being thrown at him by the reporters.

“You just called me Jess.”

“So?”

“You haven’t called me by that name for awhile.”

“I stopped calling you that because I didn’t want you to think about-“

“The girls, yeah, because they called me that.”

“Yeah...”

Jessica looked down at the grass between her boots and tried to pull herself together. The betrayal was still fresh in her memories no matter how much help she tried to get over it. However she loved hearing her nickname being called out by James. It was sure better than Sica, or Mrs. Onslaught by far. She was so wrapped up in her mind that she didn't notice James's hand intertwined with hers.  Cameras were flashing everywhere and more fans started to shout. After her brain registered the contact between them, her head went up and they looked at each other deeply. His hand felt warm and inviting.

"You still got me Jessica."

"Yeah, I do."

With that they continued to walk hand in hand.

"I don't mind if you call me Jess, Oppa."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. Besides, I miss someone calling me that anyway."

"If it makes you happy and allows you to heal I'll do this for you."

Jessica blushed a bit hearing the gentleness in his voice. With that, all thoughts of Tyler, the betrayal and cameras were flushed out of her mind. They both stopped near a bench and sat down next to one another as they gazed at the trees surrounding them. Despite the sun being out it was cold but it made things look more clean and inviting.

"So did you called Baekhyun last night, I’m scared he’s going to start annoy me again."

Jessica thought back to last night. James was freaking right. Baekhyun was head over heels over her little sister, and she kid of regret calling him. The boy was begging her to let him date Krystal, and after that, ask for advice about how to confess to her, and after that again, ask her for permission again. If Jessica didn’t miss his annoying voice, she would already shout at him to shut up, but after several months of not talking to anyone from SM, she was kind of happy to know that some of her former labelmate still miss her.

"Baekhyun was being a as always. He kept on annoy me with all this question about Krystal. You were right; he is head over heels over Krystal."

James lightly laughed at Jessica's comment

"I seriously hope that he got the guts to confess to her quickly. If you ask me, I’m sure that your former CEO is already making plans to break him and Taeyeon fake relationship apart.”

"Jess, other than Tyler........ have you ever dated anyone before?"

Jessica's eyes went wide and her face flushed with crimson red. She turned her head away just as soon as James realized how he let that slip from his tongue.

‘Well ....’

"That came out of nowhere don't you think?"

"No, it's a simple question. Have you ever been with anybody in your life or not?"

James rubbed his head not knowing why he did that. He gave a slight laugh though and tried to come up with a way to justify his question.

"I thought that since we've talked about a lot of personal stuff this was the one thing we haven't mentioned. Being good friends for several years I thought it would be a good discussion."

"You're just trying to mess with me! It's rude to ask that!"

Jessica and James laughed together in unison.

"Why can't you just answer the question?"

"This is absurd! I don't ask you about your personal life that often!"

"*Quid pro quo. I'll tell you if you tell me."

Jessica shook her head still feeling the flush of heat sweep her face. She could talk to James about anything but this was something she never anticipated or even imagined coming up down the road. Even she and Tyler didn’t have this kind of conversation. She stopped giggling and pulled herself together, now thinking back to her past.

"I have a few times, counting Tyler, Maybe about 5 or 6 people, I think? They never did last that long anyway."

James could picture Jessica chewing them out one by one. He shook his head hoping that the guys she dated weren't too beaten up emotionally by her.
 

"How far did you go with them?"

Jessica smirked mischievously.

"Quid pro quo. How many girls have you honestly been with?"

"About 10 and that doesn't count the endless babes I've encountered across the globe."

Jessica socked James in his side.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"For lying, that's what! I don’t believe about your “Babes across the globe” part, I know that’s bull.”

“Hey, I dated Maria Sharapova remember? She’s a Russian so it counts!”

“Only her you !”

"Alright, alright you caught me. Honestly, it was four. Now back to my question earlier, how far did you go?"

Jessica started to play with her fingers a bit as she looked down at her lap feeling embarrassed. She never talked with anyone, not even Tyler about things so personal. It felt even more uncomfortable to since James was her former crush. She swallowed up the courage though.

"Not far…Donghae, you know, from Super Junior, I dated him for about seven months back in 2009. He was my best friend at the time and he helped me gain my confidence to perform on stage. Always gave me good recommendations and always took me out to eat. He was a real gentleman."

"That's a long time. Why did it end?"

Jessica sighed deeply feeling her body turn cold.

"I didn't want to have with him yet."

The answer shocked James.

"How come? You guys seemed awfully close from what I could tell."

"I just didn't want to. Plus he wanted to get married badly and basically have me settle for a house wife and give birth to three children. To tell you the truth, I have a natural fear of childbirth. That and both me and Donghae were already at the peak of our career with ‘Gee’ and ‘Sorry sorry’. I didn't want to give that all up for him nor my ity for that matter to someone who didn't want me to succeed. I'd be a fool to give up everything for a guy. “

"Well if it makes you feel better you aren't missing much when it comes to . It's overrated personally."

Jessica  could tell he said that to make her feel better.

"So then how many women managed to steal a piece of you, huh?"

James stared up at the sky for a bit before answering.

"All four of them. It didn't end well though for at least two."

Jessica smirked a bit.

"You don't perform well?"

"No, no nothing like that. There wasn't any chemistry."

"It's what they all say. Excuses, excuses."

They both laughed together and continued to talk for some time in the park

. Later on they went out for lunch and went around window shopping together for a couple of hours with the reporter following their every move, including to the bathroom, which both of them ignore.

James bought Jessica a couple of things she wanted like books and other food supplies she might have needed, Though she was still continuing to get paid despite not doing anything. James didn't mind helping her cover for stuff and he even made a deposit on her apartment during the month to help out. He didn't want her to be forced to move into a broken place without having a friend nearby. It also helped him out having her as his neighbour. He didn't crave alcohol as much for the first time in almost 2 years. He didn't want to sound rude, but her getting kicked out of Girls Generation was probably the best thing that happened to him. Helena gave him something to look forward to, something to heal while he couldn't help himself.

By the time they got through running in town night had come swiftly into the sky. The stars were out despite there being fog. Leon ordered take out for them to go as they headed back for their apartments. During the wait he got several texts from s and label mate to look at  the news which he ignore. He wasn't going to let anything ruin this day or make Jessica worry about him. Jessica couldn't help but keep hearing his phone buzz on the way back home.

"Who keeps on trying to get a hold of you? It sounds urgent."

"It's just my label mates, they are just asking me to read the news about me. I just do it later. Hurry, It’s starting to rain."

The sky was getting murkier and Helena could smell the acidic flavour the clouds carried. As swift as James mentioned the weather, it started pouring and they raced back home. By the time they ran up the stairs to James's apartment the food was all drenched. They both whined together feeling like it was a wasted trip.

"Worst thirty bucks I've ever spent on food."

James laughed followed by Jessica who was using her jacket to dry her hair.

“It could be worse. We may have to listen to our dance choreographer talking about us.”

James went into the bathroom and got a couple of towels. He went back into the living room and tossed one to Jessica and she began to wrap herself up in it. Her hair poofed up slightly from the static the towel had and Leon couldn't help but think she looked cute. He shortly began to dry his hair too and he took off his jacket and tossed it behind the couch.

"How can you stand not wearing a coat? If I was a guy, my balls would be freezing. No offense."

“None taken.”

James laughed then found himself pulling Jessica to him. His arms wrapped around her body and the side of her cheek was pressed into his chest. Jessica's nerves were going off like a wild fire as she could hear his heartbeat. She had only dreamed of being so close to him physically and couldn't believe he pulled her into a cuddle.

"Don't get the wrong idea I'm just trying to warm you up."

"I'm not the one with the dirty mind here."

"......Fair enough."

Jessica started to drift off to sleep feeling calm and relaxed. James took notice and grabbed a blanket not far from the head of the couch and placed it on the both of them. He held her tightly and watched her body take in and release breath. Leon thought about the news he needed to tell her, about the movie offer that Kris told him, but seeing her cutely sleeping like this, he just tell her later.

After tucking Jessica to sleep and washing himself up at the bathroom, he went to open his laptop and search the web for some news. Sure enough, the entire web page was full of his name.

‘Impaction’s James Park to go into hiatus?!’

‘End of K-Pop, James Park to take a one year break?!’

‘K-Pop superstar James Park refused offer to collaborate with American Pop Star Justin Bieber!’

‘Former member of Girls Generation, Jessica Jung seen going on a date with King of K-Pop, James Park!’

‘First going on a hiatus, and now going on a date with Jessica Jung?! What are you doing James!?”

One news manage to get James attention, he quickly moved his mouse and clicked on it.

Jessica Jung turn 27, ex Girls Generation member to marry Tyler Kwon before next birthday?!

• By Mangala Dilip
  | Updated: March 5, 2015

  ---

Former "Girls' Generation" singer Jessica Jung is celebrating her 26^th birthday (according to American Calender) on 18 April, Saturday. She is an obsession with many K-pop fans, and has always been very open about reciprocating their love for her.

In the weekend prior to her actual birthday, Jung invited a large group of her fans to attend an advanced birthday party with her in Seoul. Jung, who turned 27 according to Korean age calculation, spent a lot of time interacting with her fans and gifting them with a deluxe gift package, reports kpopstarz.

The special surprise gift amid sparkling water, mouth-watering snacks and a light stick shaped like Jung, was a customised polaroid selfie of the singing sensation. She herself spent a lot of time writing personalised messages on the 700 unique polaroids before gifting into the fans.

The fans who were touched by the love and effort she put into giving them gifts, now more than ever, want to see her happy. One way to ensure that, is to marry the one you love and in Jung's case, it is rumoured to be Coridel Group CEO Tyler Kwon.

When Jung left "Girls' Generation", managed by SM Entertainment  to focus on her her own fashion brand, Black and Eclare, many reports suggested that her "fiancé" Kwon may have played a role in it.

However Jung, who is ranked as the 6^th most successful business owner in South Korea as of 2015 by the tvN Ranking, denied the rumours saying: "It's not true...I don't have plans of marriage as of right now... However, like how all women dream of marriage, I think I will also marry someday," reports Hollywood Take.

Even Kwon vehemently denied a marriage proposal being the reason for Jung to move on. "Sigh, I guess we'll have to try this yet again: I have no plans of marriage anytime soon, whether it be this year...next year... If that wasn't clear enough, let me know. I'll just keep trying...[汗]," he wrote on Weibo.

Source: International bussiness times

James sighed sadly and look at the Jessica, who was now cuddling with one of his pillow.

“Loving you is just going to hurt me more huh? Karma is such a .”