Date: 18 April XXXX

Dear Diary:

Could life get any worse? I was being harrased by Joshua and no someone else is after me too.I know this guy as well.He was once the manager of Pledis.I don't know.It's just weird.I haven't seen him in a year,but he still looks the same as he used to.Cocky,arrogant, and smart.

His name is Seungcheol.

I never really liked him.I mean,at first,he was pretty cool,but then he kept looking at me strangely and following me everywhere.I don't even know why.I don't think I want to know why.I don't even want to think what could have happened it Joshua hadn't stumbled across us when he did.Right now,I suppose he's the lesser of two evils.

Perhaps I should start at the beginning.It was after the concert.I was on my way back to my dressing room after I had gone to the bathroom.There weren't any paper towels in the bathroom so I was furiously drying my hands on my shirt.I hadn't made it even halfway back to my dressing room when I was grabbed and slammed against the wall.

I remember thinking that it was Joshua.He had already done this in the park,so y'know - it was the logical choice.After my vision cleared,however,I recognized Seungcheol.He was always bigger then me and stronger than me.He also had that annoying smirk of his on his face.Before I was able to give a yell or even say his name in surprise,he was kissing the living daylights out of me.I couldn't make a sound, and I couldn't get away.He grabbed my wrists and pinned them t the wall with one hand.I couldn't make a move.

I felt only fear.Some kind of paralysis that I don't think I've ever felt before.I don't know.I couldn't speak,I couldn't think.I felt his other hand slip into my pants,fondling what was there.I felt like vomiting,but even that reflex wasn't working.

I don't know how long we stood there.I had tears streaming down my face as he molested me.I couldn't do anything and,thanks to Seungcheol,I was half-hard.

I'm not sure what would have happened if Joshua hadn't been searching for me - if he hadn't found me.I couldn't help but kind of wish that he would come during the entire time.I don't think I've ever been more happy to see him.

The details are kind of hazy at this moment.I can clearly remember a yell from Joshua as he turned the corner of the hallway and then a few seconds later,falling to the floor.I don't know anymore.I was a wreck at this moment.There weren't any coherent thoughts going through my head.I couldn't help but watch Joshua.I wasn't going to stop him.I doubt I could even if I had wanted to.But I didn't.

In retrospect,Joshua looked a lot like a jealous schoolboy.I don't think I should ever tell him that.I'm not sure if he would laugh or get angry.

He slammed Seungcheol at the wall,hissing curses at him.The former manager of our band just laughed.He didn't seem the least bit affected by the fact that he was being held six inches off the ground.

Joshua seemed to get even angrier by Seungcheol's snickering.I don't blame him.Who wouldn't get angry?

Finally,after what seemed an eternity,Joshua dropped Seungcheol and came over to me,not giving Seungcheol a second glance.

Seungcheol stood up,a smirk spreading across his face."He's not yours anymore,Joshua," the man sneered."He's fresh meat for anyone here.Our deal no longer exists."

I froze when he called me "fresh meat." I didn't like that term.It's as if he's trying to tell me that I'm nothing but a toy to the multitudes of the world.

Then his last sentence set in.Joshua flushed with shame or embarrassment or something that I can't even begin to describe.I was confused by Seungcheol's words but I didn't want to ask Joshua about them right then.I was too traumatized,too paralyzed,too scared to do anything but sit there and tremble violently.

I couldn't help,on the other hand,to secretly enjoy the feeling of Joshua's arms around me.He rocked me gently,back and forth, my hair.

It was exactly how it used to be,back when it was Pledis.After a few minutes of sitting there,it seemed that my reflexes had all come back,including the one that was forcing bile into my throat because of what had just happened.I shoved Joshua away and doubled over,vomiting on the ground where he had been mere seconds before.

Joshua just looked at me."I suppose I should thank you for pushing me away."

I looked at him,wiping my chin." you," I growled softly.He just grinned at me.I couldn't help but smile.I don't even know why.It's just a reflex.I suppose I can't help it.I don't think I can help doing anything at the moment.

I suppose I'm just being insane,but I want to go back to him.But there was still the matter of the deal between Joshua and Seungcheol.I'll confront Joshua about it tomorrow.After all,I have a free week 'cept for the practice.Yeah.I'll talk to him tomorrow.If he really wants to make this work again,he'll tell me.If he doesn't tell me... then... I don't know.I'll fall off that bridge when I come for it.

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Sorry for the short chapter im just too tired to write long chapter today.

also im soo sorry to Seungcheol fans i had to make him the bad guy in this story its not that i hate him i mean there need to be a bad person in every love story sooo <3