Chapter 1 – Escaping Reality

*Trigger warning: Suicide attempt

           A man sat in the shadows of his bedroom.  His cheeks were stained with tears.  His eyes bloodshot and puffy.  His body seemed to be skin and bones.  It was as if he hadn’t been sleeping or eating for months.  In truth, it had only been a week and he degraded so much.  All of his housemates were worried and they had tried everything they could do to cheer the poor man up.  Sadly, nothing they could do seemed to put even a tiny smile on his face.  He was heartbroken and hopeless and nobody could do anything about it.

            Well, one person could.  Though those hopes are long gone.

            He took another deep breath as he reached for the only thing he would let touch his lips.  A warm glass of water.  He drank it down in one go before standing up to walk across his room.  Then he stopped again in front of the bed across his.  The bed that used to house his beautiful lover who was now long gone.  He hadn’t dared to touch it for months, but he knew that now was the right time.  He sat down on the bed and stared the bottle in his hands.

            “It’ll go away if I do this,” he whispered hoarsely, a smirk forming on his face.  “Right, Sungmin?”

            The man uncapped the bottle and poured out who knows how many pills on his other hand.  He stared at the pills, his expression blank.  He had attempted to do this many times before, but he never had the courage to actually slip the pills through his lips.  But, now that he’s come into terms that all his hopes and dreams were gone, he was more willing.  Add in the fact that he feels even more empty and weak and there really was no hope for the guy.  He continued to stare at the beautiful blue pills, tempting and teasing him.

            He proceeded to lift the pills closer and closer to his mouth.

            Outside his room, the rest of his house mates were hustling about the dorms, minding their own business.  Though the tension and sorrow in the air could cut even the toughest of diamonds.  “Who wants to check on him this time,” a brunette suddenly asked, his voice echoing throughout the dorm, authoritative.

            Everyone kept quiet.  They all desperately wanted to help the guy, but every time they went to check on him, their hearts slowly broke even more.  They too felt hopeless for they loved their sweet and caring maknae.  A hand raised up and all eyes shot down to the owner, who was sitting on the couch, staring off into the window.  “Thanks Yesung,” the other man said.  Yesung stood up from the couch and gently patted the leader on the shoulder, giving him an encouraging nod. 

            He walked towards the maknae’s room and stood in front of the door, taking a deep breath.  He’s always been there for me, now I have to be there for him.  He placed his hand on the door knob and slowly twisted it open, glad that he didn’t have to knock.  He looked at his side of the bed and found it empty.  He frowned and opened the door wider and looked at the other side of the room.

            There he found the maknae, lying in a pool of pills.

            “Please be okay,” Yesung chanted as he held the maknae’s head in his hands. 

            After finding the young man in the room, Yesung had quickly guessed what had happened and screamed bloody murder, causing everyone to rush into the room.  The leader had quickly called for an ambulance and everybody rushed around the man, doing all they could to wake him.  Yesung, having no problem with shoving his fingers down someone’s throat, did so in attempt to make the man throw up some of the pills.

            The rest of the group watched morosely, some crying quietly at the back at the scene in front of them.  Now, they were in an ambulance.  Yesung had stuck beside the man, gently caressing his hair as the ambulance flew down the streets.  The rest of the men followed behind in their own cars, many not allowed to drive due to their current state. Yesung had managed to make him throw up some of the pills, but he wasn’t quite sure what the pills consisted of and they could possibly kill the man, even in small dosages.  “You’re an idiot,” he whispered, continuing to caress him.  “You should have just told me.”

            Once arriving at the hospital, the medics quickly rushed the man out.  The doctors appeared and quickly hooked him onto god knows what before giving him a full exam.  Yesung quickly followed, but was stuck outside the room as the doctors ran about.  The other men had arrived, seemingly stumbling through the hallway.  “Is he going to be okay,” the leader had asked, his face stricken with tears.

            “I don’t know yet Leeteuk,” Yesung responded sadly, gently patting his shoulders.

            A shorter man walked towards him, the pill bottle in hand.  “I thought this might be useful,” he said, handing the bottle to Yesung.  He was in shock, but tears had not come yet.  It didn’t seem real to him and he didn’t want to believe it.

            “Thanks Ryeowook,” he whispered, patting the smaller guy on the head.

            As he stood in front of the door, the rest of the men collapsed onto the floor, their faces buried in their hands.  “Someone needs to call Sungmin,” a voice broke through the silence. 

            They all turned to the owner of the voice, the man who everyone worshipped for his looks, but now looked as if he had aged a couple of years.  “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Ryewook whispered through the air, as if getting any louder would break something.

            “He deserves to know and we have no right to hide it,” the man continued.

            Yesung nodded in agreement.  “Someone call him,” he said, before turning around to face an opened door.  A doctor stepped out, staring at the clipboard in his hands. 

            “Are you the family of Mr. Cho Kyuhyun,” the doctor asked, staring at Yesung.

            “We all are,” he responded, gesturing towards the group of men.

            The doctor looked around and nodded.  “Good news is that, whatever you did, young man, saved him,” he said, gently patting Yesung on the shoulder.  Everyone sighed in relief.  “But he needs to stay in the hospital so we can monitor him.  He looks like one of my anorexic patients and that is not a good sign.”

            Yesung nodded in agreement and Leeteuk stood beside him, holding onto his elbow for support.  “Can we see him,” Leeteuk asked, barely above a whisper.

            The doctor nodded.  “Yes, but he’s asleep right now,” he said.  “Please stay quiet since he needs to rest.”

            With that, the doctor and nurses walked away, leaving the men to walk into the room.  They looked down at Kyuhyun, who seemed to be peacefully resting on the bed.  His already pale white skin seemed to have gotten even paler if that was possible.  His eyes were closed, but you could see the clear dark circles around it.  His hair was amess.  It would have seemed like a typical sleeping Kyuhyun if he wasn’t hooked up on multiple machines.  His mouth was covered by an oxygen mask, blocking his usual red lips, which were now a shade of pink.  His arms were attached onto an IV drip and his chest was covered with little pieces of tape to monitor his heart.  “He’s going to be okay,” Leeteuk whispered, staring at the two figures crying in the back.

            Yesung watched as a brunette man walked over to the blubbering figures.  “It’s going to be okay Donghae,” he whispered, gently rubbing his shoulders.

            “I just wish he had told somebody Hyukjae,” he said, leaning over to wrap his arms around the taller man.

            The other man, who was a little on the heavy side, continued to cry by himself.  His expression hadn’t changed, but tears wouldn’t stop strolling down his cheeks.  Another man walked over and gently patted him on the shoulder.  “It’s going to be okay Shindong,” the man whispered.

            Shindong didn’t respond and only nodded his head, knowing that if he had opened his mouth, he would be wailing as he cried.  Yesung walked closer to Kyuhyun and gripped his hand.  “I’m going to punch you in the face when you wake up,” Yesung whispered, trying to lighten the air.  “But then I’m going to take you out into the world and show you how to enjoy life again because this isn’t living Kyuhyun.”  He felt a tight grip on his other hand and looked over at Ryeowook, who was forcing a smile on his face.

            Suddenly, a short man barged into the room.  Sweat dripped down his forehead and his hair was all over the place.  It was as if he had just come from a marathon.  All eyes focused on him as his wandered over to the man on the bed.  “Oh my god,” he whispered, rushing to Kyuhyun’s side.  “Kyuhyun!”  He gripped the man’s hand as tears started to stroll down his cheeks.

            “Sungmin,” Leeteuk said, gripping his shoulder tightly.

            The man on the bed opened his eyes and widened in fear as his eyes fell on the man who had just arrived.  “No,” he whispered hoarsely, struggling against the hold on his hands.  “Leave me alone!  Anyone but you!  Please!  I don’t want this anymore!”

            Kyuhyun started to struggle more and more, his eyes never leaving the man’s figure.  “Leave,” Yesung suddenly yelled out as a nurse rushed into the room.

            The figure was led out by Leeteuk as the nurse injected a sedative into Kyuhyun’s arm.  “Rest dear,” she cooed as she gently patted his arm.

            Kyuhyun’s eyes started to flutter before his cries slowly died down.  “Please don’t let me see him again,” he whispered before closing his eyes, escaping reality once more.

^^^^^^^^^^

A/N: Wow that was hard to write.  Sorry I haven’t fixed up the prologue yet, but I do intend to.  It’s just that I had a random burst of an idea to write this.

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