à volonté​ - meaning "at will," indicates a song's tempo (and sometimes articulation or dynamics) will be determined by the performer

---

 

-Hyuk’s POV-

 

Waking up felt like such a chore the next morning, more than likely because I could hardly sleep at all to begin with. After all that had happened over the weekend, or rather all that hadn’t happened, it’s like everything didn’t feel worth it anymore. My sole reason for being here wasn’t talking to me and Hakyeon… Well, Hakyeon was another story entirely.

 

I barely even know the guy and the thought of someone else having his undivided attention, someone else touching him like Kai was--. Why? Why did all of this make my blood boil like I actually had any say in how Hakyeon interacted with others? I shouldn’t care. So he’s genuinely a nice guy. So what?

 

So.. he approached me and selflessly offered his help to keep me from getting in trouble. So what?

 

So we’re some kind of match made in dancing heaven. So what?

 

So… I missed Hakyeon’s contagious smile and shining eyes that seemed to radiate warmth and happiness.I dragged a hand over my face with a soft frustrated moan. So ing what?!

 

I can’t possibly allow myself to fall for him. For anyone. There’s no way I can afford such a luxury right now, or at all, as long as I attend this Academy solely on a scholarship that focused on grades and conduct. I haven’t allowed myself to fall for anyone for eighteen years and I’ll be damned if the literal definition of walking perfection was the one to break such a long lasting streak.

 

A soft knock on the door broke me away from the jumbled mess that was my thoughts and I glanced at the clock sitting on my desk. It was still nearly fifteen minutes until my first alarm was set to go off, making me wonder as to who could need Hongbin or myself at such an early time.

 

Stifling a yawn, I moved slowly from my bed with my eyes fixed on the outline of Bin fast asleep across the room. Lucky bastard wouldn’t have to wake up for almost another two hours. The two of us wouldn’t be free at the same time until near dinner time later tonight and that meant going through our shared afternoon classes with the stupid tension hanging over us. I can only hope that it won’t affect the way we perform at rehearsals.

 

Upon opening the door I was met with Wonshik’s tired -but welcoming- smile, paired with a small wave of his hand.

 

“Morning sleepy head.” He greeted in that soft, comforting tone of his.

 

“Um, morning? Wonshik-hyung, it’s like 6AM…” I answered back in an equally soft voice, ever so cautious of disturbing my sleeping roommate. I really shouldn’t care if I woke Hongbin up or not, not with the way he acted last night when I had only been worried about his well being.

 

“I would have just texted you, but I don’t have your number and I wasn’t sure if you were going to be awake or not.” He explained, glancing past me and looking around my room while hugging his arms to himself. He was already dressed for classes which made me wonder just how early he wakes up every morning to get ready. “Anyway, I wanted to invite you out for breakfast and coffee. We seem to just barely miss each other with our schedules during the day, and I go to the cafe down the road around this time every Monday. So.. I figured, why not? And it gives Hongbin a chance to sleep undisturbed for a longer amount of time, not that you disturb him on purpose, or at all, I just thought it’d be nice to get to know y-”

 

“Let me change real quick,” I started with a grin, moving back into the room and motioning for him to follow me quietly. I switched on my desk lamp to its dimmest setting and grabbed my phone off the charger, unlocked it, and handed it to Wonshik before whispering “Put your number in.”

 

Wonshik nodded and sat down at the foot of my bed while I grabbed a change of clothes and went to the bathroom to wash up faster than I ever thought I could go through my daily routine.

 

I couldn’t quite pinpoint how I was feeling about the sudden invitation, but it was definitely pleasant. My last pleasant interaction with anyone having been dinner with Taekwoon a few nights ago. Not that my brief encounter with Sungjae was a negative one, it just happened to end too quickly to leave any sort of lasting impression whether it be good or bad. But it definitely didn’t help that I wasn’t able to take but two bites of my noodles before taking off after Hakyeon and then losing my appetite altogether after going through such a pathetic breakdown in the corridor.

 

I shut myself up in the dorm after that ordeal and ignored every attempt of social interaction initiated by Sungjae -though I was the one who had requested that he text me about our group dance project. There were a couple of occasions where someone knocked on my door, but if it wasn’t Hakyeon or Hongbin I saw when looking through the peephole then they were ignored.

 

I worked on auto-pilot throughout Sunday morning, completely forgetting that I was planning on ignoring the world again for that day. After nearly running into Taekwoon and Jaehwan head first on the way to find breakfast I decided that going off campus for a while couldn’t hurt. I only let my mind linger on the ironic fact that Hongbin and I had planned to explore the new town together in our free time for just a moment before shoving away the thoughts and forcing myself to actually enjoy the time I had to myself.

 

I did enjoy it for the most part. There was a cute bakery in town that made the best, and probably the most fattening, chocolate muffins I’d ever tasted. I hadn’t planned on buying anything other than dorm necessities with my own money while I was out, knowing that it wouldn’t last forever, but I couldn’t help but splurge on the muffins. After eating the first one I eagerly made my way back to the counter to buy three more, spewing out countless praises along the way and earning two more extra muffins free of charge from the owner of the bakery at the promise of coming back to ‘grace them with such a beautiful face and attitude’ as soon as possible.

 

The day flew by after that. I completely immersed myself in shopping and managed to get quite a bit for the small amount of money I had allowed myself to spend after the whole muffin ordeal. And by late afternoon as I walked through the front gates of the Academy, I came to the conclusion that I loved discount stores and secondhand shops.

 

Rather than spending my evening like I wanted to -holed up in a practice studio to brainstorm ideas for a group dance project- I spent it reorganizing mine and Hongbin’s mini fridge and food cabinet before putting away the bit of groceries I bought. It was probably better that I stayed in anyway, considering the whole thing about not wanting to partake in any sort of social interaction until class the next day. Plus, staying in gave me time to do other things, like figure out how to setup my student account on the Academy’s website and go through the tutorials on how to submit assignments for online homework.

 

From looking through all of the syllabi that were given out over the first week it looked to be an insanely busy first term. From technique classes to prepping end-of-term showcase ensembles of all genres, with things like the pas de deux project and recital attendance essays in between, it made me wonder when I would have time to myself, much less time to socialize. It would definitely benefit me to get all these misunderstandings resolved now while I have the time to do so, rather than later when I’m swamped with endless practices and homework.

 

“Okay, I’m ready to go.” I whispered excitedly, crossing over to my side of the dorm room to hold the door open for Wonshik while he stood up from my bed.

 

“You might want to bring your dance bag, I’m not sure if you’ll have enough time to come back and get it by the time we return to the school.” He said, depositing my phone into the front pocket of my sleeveless hoodie as we switched places so that he was now holding the door open.

 

“Ah, right. Okay.” I ducked back into the room to retrieve the bag and made sure to grab a bottle of water from the mini-fridge to avoid having to buy one from a vending machine later on. The tiny light in the fridge felt blinding in the pitch darkness of the room without the soft glow of my desk lamp to balance it out and it took a moment for my eyes to adjust. Confusion clouded my thoughts upon seeing a stack of side dishes stored in various tupperware containers beside the water bottles I’d just stocked yesterday afternoon. I filed away the confusion to the back of my mind and grabbed two water bottles, I would have to ask Hongbin about the side dishes later.

 

“By the way,” Wonshik began as we walked down the front steps of the Academy’s entrance. “I noticed that you didn’t have any of our numbers so I gave you my number along with Jaehwan, Taekwoon, and Hakyeon’s. You know.. just in case you need anything or just someone to talk to.”

 

“Ah, thank you! If we’re speaking honestly, Hyung.. I was slightly wary of you at first.” Wonshik raised a silent questioning eyebrow at this but kept walking ahead. “Not like in a bad way or anything! You just didn’t talk much when I was around, almost felt like you kind of hated me. But I realized that definitely wasn’t the case when you invited me to lunch with you guys the other day.”

 

“I’m sorry I gave you that impression. Don’t worry, I do actually talk. It’s just that when I’m around loud people like Hakyeon and Jaehwan I let them do most of the talking.”

 

“Those two are a bit chatty, yeah.”

 

“They mean well, though. Trust me, Jaehwan always complains about never getting to spend time with you and Hakyeon never shuts up about you two. Something about dancing with you being fate?” I scoffed a little too harshly at the last bit and quickly tried to cover it up with one sorry excuse of a fake laugh, but not without being questioned for it. “What?”

 

“Oh, nothing. Fate is just a funny thing, ya know?” Hilarious, even.

 

°°°

 

“Well you sure took your sweet ti- AH HYUKIE!!!” Jaehwan shot up from his seat across from Taekwoon and all but sprinted toward me like a dog meeting its owner after being home alone all day. He scooped me into a tight hug that only lasted a few seconds before he let go enough to take one of my hands and excitedly pull me toward their table.

 

“Hakyeon sure is going to be sorry for missing out today, of all days.” Taekwoon chuckled lightly as he caressed my cheek and down to my chin before pulling his hand back and I honestly couldn’t tell if I was more flustered by the fleeting touch or the mention of Hakyeon. “Maybe he’ll miraculously feel better if I send him a text saying that Sanghyuk is here.” He remarked with a teasing grin.

 

“Is Hakyeon-hyung sick?!” I asked, worried. Though I doubt Hakyeon would have such a reaction in knowing that he’d missed seeing me. If anything he would probably be glad he didn’t come along.

 

“The only sick that guy is is lovesi-!” Jaehwan began to blurt out before jolting in his seat and sending a glare toward Taekwoon.

 

“The hell was that for!? You know it’s true! Ever since he came back from getting lunch on Saturday all he’s done is sulk and sigh at his phone like he’s waiting for someone’s call!” The ever so chatty Jaehwan went on about how down in the dumps Hakyeon was being and I couldn’t help but to feel that I was the one causing it all. But that wouldn’t really explain the part about him sighing at his phone. Hakyeon doesn’t have my number as far as I know.

 

“So Taekwoon-hyung!” I blurted out, successfully cutting off Jaehwan mid-sentence. All eyes were glued to me as I came up with anything to start up some sort of small talk. Literally anything to get off the topic of Hakyeon. “Are you interning again this week? It seemed like you really enjoyed where they assigned you last week.”

 

The conversations flowed seamlessly after that. Taekwoon went on about his internship as the four of us took our place in line to order. He would get his assignment for the week later today, but he hoped for another beginner-type class.

 

I stepped up to the counter when it was my turn to order and scanned the menu for a moment before deciding on a simple fruit smoothie. “That’s all you’re getting?” Wonshik’s voice came from the left of me. He blocked my hand when I went to reach for my wallet and stepped forward to add his order with mine.

 

“No, Hyung, you don’t have to pay for mine, it’s okay.”

 

“I know I don’t have to, but I want to. Besides, if I don’t do it, Taekwoonie-hyung definitely will.” Wonshik left no room for me to argue as he finished paying and steered us back to the table.

 

I learned a lot about Jaehwan and Wonshik in the time we spent in the cafe. Wonshik transferred into Jaehwan’s high school in the middle of their junior year and began attending the same dance school soon after. They became close through the shared interest of dance and apparently the rest is history after that. I wasn’t too sure what kind of ‘history’ had been had, but I didn’t question it either.

 

The conversations varied from having y experiences with high school teachers to old dance competition stories. Wonshik talked of his interest in remixing songs and even writing some of his own over the summer break in his spare time and Jaehwan took a summer art classes at the university near their hometown. He promised to bring back a few of his pieces to show me the next time he decided to visit home.

 

Taekwoon sipped at his coffee, quietly observing us while we chit-chatted. I could tell he was giving the other two time to get to know me better since he and I had already had chance before, but he seemed content by just watching. He smiled along with the funny stories that he had probably heard a thousand times already and teased the other two here and there.

 

The mood was nice. The three of them made me feel warm and welcome, which was a rare feeling these days. Though not once was anything family-related brought up or mentioned in any of the conversations. It seemed odd, the way they effortlessly avoided any topic that would involve the mentioning of parents or siblings in any way. Maybe I just assumed that they would bring up the topic of my parents and the whole scholarship thing since that’s what I’d gotten used to when talking to anyone else from the school, but they didn’t. And if they were respectful enough not to pry into my home life, then I was definitely not about to pry into theirs.

 

-

 

“It was nice to have you here, Sanghyukkie!” Jaehwan started gathering his trash and the others two followed in suit. “You should start coming every week, and maybe even drag Hongbin’s lazy out of bed and bring him along with you.”

 

“I mean, if you want me to, sure.”

 

“Of course we want you to! Promise you’ll come again next week!” Jaehwan held out his pinky finger toward me from across the table. I looked at it for a moment before deciding that I definitely wanted to come back and maybe even make this a regular thing with them.

 

“Okay, I promise.” I said as I hooked my own pinky around his.

 

Taekwoon had mentioned wanting to buy breakfast for Hakyeon since he wasn’t able to come and I volunteered to stay with him while the other two began the walk back. I knew of a few things on the menu that Hongbin liked to eat and decided that I could afford to buy him breakfast as well, seeing as my meal and drink had been paid for by Wonshik. What had really made up my mind was seeing that the cafe made green tea frappes and knowing that there was no way Hongbin could stay mad at me if I brought him back one of those.

 

The food and drinks were ready a lot faster than our own since we ordered them to-go, Jaehwan and Wonshik’s forms still visible a ways down the street once we left the cafe. I went over my schedule for the day in my head and asked Taekwoon what his would be like. If our Monday schedules were both similar to our Friday ones, then there was the possibility of us being able to have dinner together again.

 

Taekwoon confirmed that he would be free at the same time and we made plans from there to meet in the dormitory lobby this evening.

 

“Speaking of evening schedules... I meant to tell you at the cafe but the topic never really came up.” Taekwoon started once we were just a few paces behind the other two. “The four of us, Wonshik, Jaehwan, Hakyeon, and myself, we want to start a... well like some sort of group dance team. We came up with the idea after going to a collegiate level dance competition last spring, and it’s something all four of us would like to try. We’d initially planned on holding auditions for two more members, but then both you and Hongbin enrolled and I think it goes without saying that you two are exactly what we’re looking for.”

 

“Hyung, I don’t-- It’s not that I wouldn’t want to be a part of the group, I just have a lot going on right now and--.”

 

“I figured, but it’s nothing official yet so don’t stress yourself out over making any sort of decision right now. Just come to our rehearsal Wednesday night and we’ll talk about it more there. Jaehwan is going to tell Hongbin about it later today since they usually have lunch together.”

 

We had come to a stop at the bottom of the grand staircase in the lobby of the dormitory where I would part ways from the rest of them. “I would really like it if you came, and I know the others feel the same way.”

 

“I uh, I..” I bit my lip and looked up at each of them while trying to make a final decision. Hongbin would for sure be there. Hakyeon would for sure be there. Did each of them even know that the other was going? Were they even informed that I was being invited as well? Hell, for all I know all of this mess could already be solved in a few days time. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

 

Taekwoon seemed satisfied enough with my answer as he smiled and ruffled my hair. The three of them said their goodbyes and as I turned to leave I couldn’t help but think that I was forgetting something...

 

God dammit, the excuse!

 

“Wait!” The three of them froze in place. Taekwoon looked back first with a semi-worried expression. “I-I uh, did you remember to tell Hakyeon-hyung about the excuse? I only have until today to turn it in.”

 

“Hakyeon didn’t tell you? He already turned it in for you.”

 

-Hakyeon’s POV-

 

I was already half awake when Taekwoon came back into our shared dorm room, and I almost sat upright when he let the door slam a little too hard. I was tempted to fake sleep long enough for him to gather his things and leave for class but that idea was ruined as soon as something solid came in contact with the back of my head.

 

“ing hell, Taekwoon!?” I cursed as I sat up to find whatever he’d just thrown at me. I leaned down to pick up a bag from where it had fallen to the ground when I sat up and spied the logo of the cafe on it. The bag was still warm and the smell coming from the opening was heavenly.

 

“I have half a mind to pour your drink down the bathroom sink right now. Please give me a reason not to.” He stood next to the bathroom door with his arm stretched out so that the drink in his hand was actually inside. He wouldn’t dare throw away my drink like that...

 

“What’s going on?” I asked cautiously, not wanting to provoke him any further.

 

“That’s what I’d like to know, Hakyeon. All week long you talked nonstop about Sanghyuk and how excited you were to have found someone like him. Then Friday it all just stops? You’ve been sulking all weekend - please don’t try that ‘I don’t feel well’ on me again- and Sanghyuk doesn’t look any better.”

 

“S-Sanghyuk? What do you mean, is he okay?”

 

“Why don’t you ask him yourself? Maybe actually talk to the kid? How come he had no idea you turned in the excuse slip for him? Why did his face fall every single time your name was brought up at the cafe this morning? You would have thought the two of you had actually gotten together and then broken up by how he was acting.” There was a long pause, and I thought maybe Taekwoon would just let it go because the more it was talked about the worse it made me feel. “There, like that. Sanghyuk sported that same pitiful pout every single time we talked about you.”

 

“It’s.. it’s nothing. Don’t worry about it, Taekwoon.” I fiddled with the bag in my hands, not willing to look Taekwoon in the eyes. Instead I took the muffin out of the bag and broke off a small piece to nibble at. “I’ll talk with him when I’m ready.” I mumbled around the piece. Taekwoon sat my drink down on my bedside table before sitting himself down at the foot-end of my bed.

 

“I’m not worried. I trust you know an opportunity when it presents itself and I doubt you’re going to let someone like Sanghyuk get away so easily.” I rolled my eyes at Taekwoon and playfully shoved at his side with my feet.

 

“Go away. Stop being so right. Shoo, go to class.”

 

He stilled my feet by grabbing both ankles and holding them down to the bed.

 

“Are you planning on going to his class this morning?”

 

“Not today. I still need some time to think about… things.”

 

“Well don’t think for too long, it’s annoying seeing both of you like this.” Taekwoon stood from my bed and gathered his things before heading to the door. “And just so you know, I’m not above locking the two of you in a practice room until you’ve sorted this mess out.”

 

Sometimes Taekwoon’s outbursts were a little over the top, but he always meant well. He’s the one person in my life that doesn’t take any of my and calls me out when I’m acting stupid rather than keeping quiet about it.

 

I layed in bed and contemplated whether or not I wanted to show up for Sanghyuk’s class but decided that I wasn’t ready in the end. Taekwoon was right in that I was very excited to have found someone like Sanghyuk, but my reluctance to talk with him and go to the class wasn’t solely because of the things that were said the other day. That was only one part of the reason now… the other being Kai’s proposal and the complications it was causing. Thinking about it now, I really wish I’d just gone to Sanghyuk in the dining hall when I saw him. I should never have followed the wretched boy that called to me from the dining hall’s entrance..

 

“May I help you?”

 

The boy’s answering smile reminded me of that of a villainous smirk you would only see in the movies or over dramatized tv shows, and I was instantly put off by it. I remained polite, knowing I had somewhat of a reputation for being as such in this school and I had no intentions of damaging it.

 

“My name is Kai, but you probably already knew that from when you attended the advanced freshman ballet class all this past week.”

 

“I’m afraid I don’t- Ah, Kai-ssi! Yes, you were the one who kept eyeing me and my dance partner when we did the exercise demonstrations. I’ve kept an eye on you as well,” I deadpanned before continuing with a generous smile. “Are you aware of how often you sickle your feet? You should really look into fixing that lest the muscles in your feet will not develop properly.”

 

“Talented, gorgeous, and wise. My, however did the Academy score someone as perfect as you?” I couldn’t stop the bubble of laughter that made its way through me at that cheese line. The poor boy could try and flatter me all he liked, but it would get him absolutely nowhere.

 

I coughed a couple of times in attempt to suppress any more laughter before addressing Kai as politely as possible, more than ready to end the fruitless conversation. “Can I help you with anything, Kai? I was sort of on my way to practice and-”

 

“I’m majoring in choreography and I just so happen to need someone who fits the criteria for a certain project I’m working on.” He explained quickly. His expression remained cool but I could tell he was nervous by the way he kept fidgeting on his feet.

 

“Which is?” I decided to humor him, knowing exactly where this conversation was going.

 

“Talented.” Kai took half a step closer and it took absolutely no effort to maintain my uninterested gaze.

 

“Gorgeous.” He gestured at me with his hand for added emphasis.

 

“And wise.” He looked away as if momentarily distracted by something and I took that time to give him my answer.

 

“I’m flattered, really-” I began, fully intent on keeping up my polite appearance as I declined his offer. It was that same haughty grin I’d become familiar with over the last week from attending his ballet class that cut me off.

 

“I know all about the little favor you pulled for the freshman Scholarship and how you used your advantages as a fellow recipient to get him out of trouble for skipping class yesterday morning.”

 

“Sanghyuk didn’t feel well.” I bit out, emphasizing Sanghyuk’s name. I had only been teasing Sanghyuk when I called him by the stupid nickname, but it sounded incredibly sickening coming out of Kai’s mouth.

 

“Bull.” Kai’s smile dropped as he slid an arm around my shoulders and steered us down the corridor. “Oh, what a pity it would be if someone were to tell the dean what his prized Scholarship had actually been doing Friday morning when he was supposed to be in class.”

 

I forcefully shrugged his arm off of me and moved so that we were facing each other once more. There was no point in being friendly anymore if this was how he intended to play.

 

“What do you want, Kai?”

 

“Like I said, I need a subject to use for my choreography project. But since you’re asking, I also want you to switch to being my pas de deux partner.”

 

“I don’t think-”

 

“My Wednesday evenings are completely free, so I’ll give you until then to think it over. And I hope that you really think it over, Hyung.”

 

“Sunbae.” I corrected through clenched teeth, willing my whole body not to cringe at the use of the other honorific.

 

“Here, at least have my number so that you can give me an answer if we don’t see each other before Wednesday evening. But it would really, really be an honor to dance with someone as skilled as you.”

 

Kai slipped a piece of paper between my thumb and the box salad and turned as if he was going to leave, only to stop short.

 

“By the way, Hyung, I think you might like to know that I have so many people who can’t wait to get their hands on poor Scholarship. All it would take is my ‘go’ and he’d be a dead man walking.” He cocked his head to the side with another wide grin as his eyes roamed up and down my body. “What would all these people think once they knew the third year Scholarship was just as well off?”

 

“Just… some food for thought.”

 

-

 

No, I had no idea how I was going to get around this obstacle.

 

-Hyuk’s POV-

 

The classes I shared with Hongbin were awkward to say the least. He ignored me for the most part, but I caught him stealing glances at me on more than one occasion, and I was going to take that as a good sign, if any at all.

 

During our hip-hop class we were divided into groups of six. My group consisted of Hongbin, Sungjae, Kai, and two other freshmen I’d yet to really get to know. From the outside looking in our group would seem ideal, and that’s more than likely how our teacher intended it to be, but all of us - well, at least four of us - knew how much of a ticking time bomb our group really was.

 

Half of the class period was spent learning the choreography with the whole class but included random sections left open for each group to make their own, and then for the second half of the class we split up to work in our assigned groups. Kai took charge, unsurprisingly, and decided on things like placements and formations. I went along without a fuss as he directed me to the back of the group and didn’t say a word when I was one of the only two who would not have a featured part, the other person being one of the boys I didn’t know. He looked saddened by his placement, keeping his eyes on the floor as Kai fiddled with the stereo.

 

“Hey,” I placed a hand on his shoulder and gave him an easy smile when his surprised eyes met mine. “Do not think that just because you don’t have a featured part that you’re any less important than the other dancers in this group.” I could sense Hongbin watching me from where he had been placed toward the front of the group, but he turned away the moment I looked up to answer a question the other unfamiliar boy had asked him.

 

My attention was brought back to the one in front of me when he lifted his head a little higher and straightened his back before answering with a small smile, “Thank you… I’m actually not all that great--” I cut him off with a shake of my head.

 

“You would not have gotten accepted into this school if you were anything less than great. And this is totally an Ace grouping, we were put together like this for a reason. So what if we’re in the back? We’ll be the best damn back of the group ever!” I took his small laugh as a good sign and continued, “Okay, so I’m not making much sense… bottom line is: Kai is an idiot for overlooking us and I am more than sure that we will look better than the rest of them.”

 

“Okay, let’s do it!” He half whispered half shouted as he held his hand up for a high-five.

 

“Places! We’re going to start at the eight-count combination after the first unchoreographed section and work our way backward!” I rolled my eyes at Kai’s instructions and quickly met the other boy’s hand with my own with a knowing smirk.

 

“Wait,” I gripped his hand as he began to pull away to hold him back for few more seconds. “I didn’t catch your name before…”

 

“It’s Ilhoon. Jung Ilhoon!” He whispered, mirroring the same smirk I had sported before as he pulled away to get into formation.

 

Kai was in full dictator mode as he ordered the rest of us around. Surprisingly enough, he listened to the others when they had suggestions for the unchoreographed parts, but I wasn’t about to try my luck with him.

 

Not today.

 

Not when the memory of him wrapping his arm around Hakyeon was still fresh in my mind. I know that my not saying anything to Kai or speaking my mind when I do have the occasional suggestion for choreography means that he’s won, but it’s only until I find the time to talk things out with Hakyeon and hear his side of the story. If there even is a story. I just hope that it doesn’t take too long to find such time.

 

Five minutes of class time remained and I stared at the clock as if willing the hands to turn faster. In the past hour I’d planned about five different ways I could murder Kai. One for each time he called me out when I would trip up in the dance and somehow connected my messing up to my parents’ financial status.

 

I glared hard at the clock and then at Kai as he called for two more run-throughs of the dance. Going through with that would definitely put us over the allotted class time and I could not risk being late to my next class. I got through half of the first run-through before I began to really worry about the time, and then that was all I could think about. There was one particular part in the fast-paced choreography that tripped me up and I would have landed face-first into the floor had it not been for Hongbin reaching out to steady me. I went to thank him with a smile but he’d already pulled away by then and kept dancing. The music was stopped and I already had a glare set into my face in preparation for whatever insult Kai was about to throw at me this time.

 

“You’re not focusing, Scholarship!”

 

“Yeah well, maybe I’m the only one who cares, but there’s less than two minutes left of class time and I can’t afford to be late to my technique lesson.”

 

“Why not? Surely you could just make up your tardiness with another one-on-one session with your boyfriend.” He paused to leave room for me to argue back, but I grit my teeth hard and remained silent. “Or did you two break up already? So short-lived… such a pity.” I glared harder as a satisfied grin spread across his face. He’d already crossed so many lines, but I would not give him the satisfaction of letting him know I was bothered by it. “Well,” he continued, “I’m sure if all else fails your parents can just buy your way back in-”

 

“Yah!” Hongbin and Sungjae’s voices rang out on either side of me simultaneously. I looked back and forth to each of them with wide eyes, not having expected either of them to speak up. No one ever dared to say anything when Kai went on his insult sprees in fear of being his next target. Hongbin was practically shaking in place with anger and Sungjae didn’t seem far from it, but they both shared the same glare directed at Kai.

 

Kai also glanced back and forth between the two with raised questioning eyebrows before addressing Sungjae.

 

“What? Are you on his side now?”

 

“I’m not on anyone’s side.” Sungjae answered calmly. “But even an idiot could tell that you’re way out of line here, Kai.”

 

“Class is over, Kai.” I spoke up before he could get another word out. I didn’t want Sungjae to have to deal with his for defending me in any sort of way. “We’re done for the day.”

 

I briefly hooked my pinky through Hongbin’s and gave it a slight squeeze and nodded a silent ‘thanks’ to Sungjae before quickly gathering my things and all but ran out of the studio. I could still make it to the technique lesson if I hurried.

 

°°°

 

By the time Wednesday morning rolled around I was basically staring at the entrance to my first class from where I was sitting on the floor to stretch. It was like my brain thought that Hakyeon would magically appear through the door if I stared at it long enough.

 

But he didn’t.

 

I went through the motions of the class once more without Hakyeon around, and though I would never admit it out loud, the class was boring as hell without him. It was also a hell of a lot less judge-y with him there… Hakyeon seemed to have this way about himself that made everyone around him comfortable. He didn’t care when I messed up or faltered in place, he would just smile or laugh it off and tell me to try it again while giving me a few pointers on how I could improve. He blocked out the judgemental stares and eyerolls that I now received in full force in his absence. Sungjae sometimes offered sympathetic glances purposefully bring attention to himself just to give me a break. I was thankful for him, at least.

 

We didn’t practice in pairs today, thankfully. I didn’t think I could handle having to go through another class of partner work with the teacher. Sure, she was in great shape for how old she must be, but it was still somewhat embarrassing for my fill-in partner to be missing-in-action without any sort of notice or excuse for three days now. The teacher must have been sharing the same thoughts as she pulled me to the side after class was dismissed.

 

“Sanghyuk, I wanted to know if you’ve heard anything from Hakyeon? I’m afraid we weren’t able to find a new fill-in to take his place and I’ve been meaning to talk to him about joining the class full-time, or at least when we do partner projects. As long as you’re comfortable with it, of course. Kai had mentioned something about you saying you weren’t really comfortable dancing with another guy, and that’s totally understandable, but-”

 

“Ah.. that..” That conniving dickwad, I finished in my head. I couldn’t even begin to fathom Kai’s sudden interest in Hakyeon and his relation to me. Knowing Kai, it probably wasn’t good, whatever it was.

 

“It’s just that you two seem to have a bit of chemistry when dancing together and compliment each other nicely. I’m really at a dead end here, and I would hate to ask any of the girls to take on two Pas de Deux projects… ” She trailed off, leaving room for me to make the ultimate decision, though it was pretty clear that I didn’t have much of a choice in the matter. This actually gave me the perfect excuse to find Hakyeon and force him to listen to me whether he was ready or not. I was not about to fail such an important project due to lack of partner when I knew very well that Hakyeon was an available and well suited candidate for the job.

 

“Mmm, I understand. And about Hakyeon, I think he hasn’t been feeling well over the past few days, but I’ll try to talk to him this afternoon and let him know the situation.” I gave the teacher a polite bow and said my goodbyes. I needed to move fast if I was going to find Hakyeon before tonight. We had a similar break time right after our first class, but he could be literally anywhere on campus.

 

I set out for the dormitory first. It was likely that if he hadn’t been showing up for the first morning class the past few days, then he was probably sleeping in like any normal human being would be.

 

But I should have known better than to label Hakyeon, of all people, as something such as ‘normal’ as Taekwoon answered their door. He must have just gotten back from his first class, his sweat slicked hair and lack of shirt giving that much away.

 

“I take it by the way your face just fell that you were hoping to see a certain other someone? About yay high,” he gestured exaggeratedly around his mid-chest area, “tan complexion, tries to be cute in order to get his way, never stops talking?”

 

“That… that would be him.” I sighed. There was absolutely no use in hiding it from Taekwoon when he seemed to miraculously always know what was going on anyway.

 

“I’m glad one of you has finally come to your senses.” He mumbled, leaning casually against the doorframe. “I would check the dining hall first, if he’s not there then maybe every dance studio on the third floor of the annex. Just.. talk things out slowly, give each other space to answer or ask questions. You both seem pretty stressed over whatever is going on between the two of you, so I really hope it can be resolved. Especially before tonight.”

 

“Tonight? Oh! Right, the group thing. Yeah, that would be… interesting if we weren’t… You know, I’m going to just quit talking now and go find Hakyeon-hyung.”

 

“Good luck.” Taekwoon waved and stood back to let the door swing shut.

 

I scanned the seats in the dining hall from the entrance and briefly found myself wishing that Hakyeon still had his bright red hair. It would definitely make finding him a hell of a lot easier with something that stood out like a beacon in the night. Though it probably wouldn’t be too hard to spot him in the dining hall either way at such an odd time. I was a little late for breakfast, but not quite late enough to be considered lunch time, thus the dining hall was nearly empty save for the few people who just liked to linger for the atmosphere and good WiFi connection.

 

I didn’t linger by the the dining hall for much longer, figuring that if I didn’t spot him or at least hear him by now, then he probably wasn’t there.

 

I took the steps in the dance annex two at a time, a habit that Hongbin has always found annoying since his legs are considerably shorter than my own. The thought of him yelling some sarcastic remark about showing off had me smiling. Hongbin had gradually started to acknowledge my existence after the group dance incident with Kai. He still seemed to be skirting around the talk that definitely needed to happen, but at least he wasn’t completely ignoring me anymore. I liked to think that the green tea frappe and breakfast I left him Monday morning had a lot to do with it, and I was already planning on doing it again next week.

 

My instinct was telling me to forget checking every single dance studio on the third floor and to just go for 3-B, but I looked through each window anyway.

 

He was there, in the very studio I just knew he’d be in, his body moving fluidly and effortlessly across the dance floor. I only allowed myself to watch and admire his dancing for a few moments before I got completely lost in it. We needed to talk, and this would be our only time to do so before tonight.

 

I felt an overwhelming sense of deja vu when our gazes met in the mirror, only this time Hakyeon didn’t turn and call out to me, nor did I turn and run. Instead I pushed open the door and took a few steps into the studio, not bothering to close the door shut behind me.

 

“H-Hi.” Great. I couldn’t even say a single word to him without stuttering.

 

Hakyeon said nothing, but gave a slight nod of his head in greeting before fetching his phone from where it was connected to the stereo.

 

“I, uh.. I thought I might find you up here.” Hakyeon raised an eyebrow and continued to walk around the studio to gather up his water bottle and what I assumed was his jacket and a sweat towel. He’s getting ready to leave, I realized and began to panic a little. “That was a lie, I came up here at Taekwoon-hyung’s suggestion after having practically ran from my class to your dorm room to find you.”

 

Hakyeon stood in the middle of the room and glared down at his phone, his knuckles nearly turning white from how tightly he was gripping it. The phone began to vibrate in his hand and a name that I couldn’t quite see flashed across the screen. Hakyeon swallowed thickly and cleared his throat, his voice void of any emotion when he finally did speak up.

 

“It was a wasted trip, then.” The phone had stopped ringing by now, but he still stared at it. “I’m meeting someone soon, so I should get going.”

 

Hakyeon had yet to move or even so much as look at me, and we were -once again- getting nowhere. I took the initiative and walked over to where he stood

 

“You’re avoiding me..” Hakyeon’s head snapped up at that and I knew I was right. Something -sadness?- flashed across his face for only a second before it hardened into a glare.

 

“Believe it or not, Sanghyuk, not everything is about y--.” Both of us looked down at his phone as it began to vibrate in his hand once again, and I had a full view of the name flashing across the screen now that I was closer.

 

“I was just about to go and find you.” The answer on the other end of the line was muffled. “Yes, I..” Hakyeon paused for a moment as he looked back up at me. The sadness in his eyes I thought I had only imagined seeing earlier was back as he continued speaking to Kai. “I’ve made a decision. Where can I meet you?”

 

He only stayed on the phone long enough to hear Kai’s whereabouts before aggressively tapping on the end-call button numerous times and quickly pocketing the device.

 

“I really can’t talk right now, Sanghyuk-ah.” It could have been my imagination again, but it definitely sounded like Hakyeon was trying to keep his voice from shaking as he backed toward the studio’s entrance.

 

“Kai is waiting on me right now, so I’ll be leaving first.” No, it definitely wasn’t my imagination. Neither was the fake smile he tried to pull off as he turned and left the studio.

 

---------

 

-Ilhoon

 

-Gongchan (the other freshman in the hip-hop group)

 

---

 

a/n: This chapter and the next will be the final ones that are happening day-by-day. There will be multiple time skips after that. Sorry this took ages, it was meant for Christmas but let's pretend it's for New Years now!~ Happy holidays, guys ^^
ps. don't hate kai too much.
pps. all important characters except for one have been introduced by this point, i've listed them in the description if you're curious for the last one ^^
ppps. i wrote a fluffy chasang oneshot for christmas, you can read it here if you're interested!
 

thanks for reading<3 question: did you guys like how i linked the dances i imagined for the boys as they danced or would you rather i go without? (there are quite a few dances in the next chapter)