The next couple of days were a bit stressful. Not only that all my relatives were coming over to visit, but my parents' friends also visited and my grandparent's friends as well. Although I usually enjoyed company I had just felt like wanting to be alone lately. On top of that my grandfather seemed to want to talk to me every single day since the funeral and he would literally never leave me alone. I put up with everyone trying to cheer me up for about a week after the funeral until I felt like I was fed up with it.
One day my uncle Kibum and his husband Jinki came to visit. Kibum had always been my favorite out of all my relatives. Once he entered our apartment I stuck to him and Jinki and refused to talk to the other guests. Instead I sat in my room with Jinki and decided to talk to him about something that had been bothering me for a while now – and that something was Kim.

“Are you sure you're okay, Taemin-ah?” Jinki asked and smiled a little at me. His hand was resting on my knee and I liked the feeling of that since it made me feel more secure. “You look bothered.” I pouted and looked down at my feet. Just like always when I was thinking I noticed how my fingers were fiddling with the hem of my shirt. I found it difficult to explain what had happened to me on the graveyard where I had met Kim. And for some reason, I just couldn't find the right words. I was getting more nervous quickly and felt my heart beating all weirdly. “Maybe you'd rather talk to Kibum about this?” Jinki suggested when I hadn't spoken for a few minutes. I looked up at him and smiled a tiny bit, nodding. “Please don't be mad, Hyung …”

“I'm not.” he said quickly and shook his head. “Why would I be. Let me go get him, okay?” with that he patted my knee and got up. Before he left the room he smiled at me and closed the door. I heard lots of people talking in the kitchen next to my room and could also hear Kibum's voice when he excused himself. Just a moment later he was sitting next to me on my bed and had his arm put around me.
“What's up, buddy?” he asked with his usual caring voice that always helped me to relax. He was smiling and I could feel that he was trying to look into my eyes. “Jinki said you wanted to talk … Are you alright?”

“Yeah … I mean, no, not really.” I mumbled and rubbed the back of my neck. It was still difficult to say because I had come to the conclusion that I might have just imagined Kim after all. And since there had been no time for me to go back to the graveyard to try and see him again my mind was playing games with me. “I … met someone.” I eventually managed to say. “Someone at the graveyard … a boy.”

“So?” Kibum smiled a bit more. “Is he nice?”

“Yes … very nice.” for some reason my cheeks were burning and I had to laugh a bit when I remembered how Kim hadn't wanted to tell me his name at first. “Those coffin bearers took the coffin and everyone was following …” I paused and pouted again, thinking how I should explain why I had run off.
“Your Mom told me that you ran off, don't worry.” he cut in. “I can understand. Funerals can be upsetting.”

“Yes.” I agreed. “I just wanted some time alone. I walked around for a bit and found a grave from a boy who died in the Korean war.” Kibum stayed silent and just listened, even when I paused and thought for a while he didn't pressure me. When I told him about Kim and how we had talked for a while he seemed a bit worried but didn't say anything about it at first. He only got a bit weirded out when I mentioned that Kim had disappeared so quickly and that there had been no signs of him having been there. Once I finished my story he just raised his brows and thought for a couple of minutes until he seemed to have come to a conclusion.
“To be honest …” he said slowly. “I think you might have imagined that boy, Taemin-ah. You said you didn't even hear him when he walked over to you?”

“He didn't make a single sound …”
Kibum smiled a little and ran a hand through my hair, just like he always did when he wanted to comfort me. “See … maybe you were just really upset about your grandmother … When my father died I started talking to one of my soft toys. We all need someone neutral to talk to in situations like that. And maybe Kim was an imagination you needed in order to think.”

“… maybe.” I agreed quietly and shrugged. Although this was what I had come to think as well I didn't really feel fine with it at all. “But it felt really real …”

“Those things always feel very real.” Kibum said with a sad smile. When I lifted my head in order to look at him he took the opportunity and looked right into my eyes. “Try to forget about that boy, okay? Even if he was real, he told you he didn't want to see you again, right?”

“Well … he just said he'd rather not come over to my place …” I mumbled and soon adverted my eyes from his. “It's not saying he doesn't want to see me again …”

“Just forget about him.” Kibum insisted. “It's over now … once you're back in school next week you'll be busy again and realize that it was just imagination. You'll see.”
For a while I didn't reply and didn't look at him. I didn't really know what to say. I really wasn't satisfied with his theory.

Was it really possible that I had imagined my entire encounter with Kim?

“Hyung?” I eventually spoke up again after a lot of time had passed. “Do you think I could stay at your place for a while?” I didn't really dare to look up at him this time. I had been living with him and Jinki back when my parents had had a bad crisis in their marriage, but that had been other conditions. Now I just wanted to live with them so I could have some peace and quiet. I was just about to take my questions back when he already agreed.
“You can always stay at our place, Min.” he rubbed my shoulder. “You've still got your room at our place, you know. We didn't take anything out.” I felt touched by his words and nodded. It was a good feeling to know that there was someone who would always welcome me, no matter what. “I'll go ask your parents, yes?” and with that he leaned in and gave my cheek a gentle kiss before leaving the room again and closing the door.

I got up right away and started packing my stuff. I didn't want to stay here any longer than necessary. My bag was soon packed and I had already put on my shoes when Kibum returned to my room. His smile told me that my parents had agreed and would let me live with him and Jinki for a while. He didn't even need to tell me to hurry, I just hurried all by myself and before I knew it I was saying bye to my parents for now, ignored all the other guests and left with Jinki and Kibum by my side. They were talking to each other, but I didn't really pay attention. For some reason my mind was busy with thinking about Kim.
By now I had abandoned the thought of having imagined him. I had been rather sure about it before I talked to my uncle, but now that he agreed that it had been imagination I felt like Kim must have been real.

But how … how could he have vanished that quickly and leave no traces at all …

“He's probably a ghost.” I mumbled to myself and had to snort at the thought of that. “Yeah, right …” Kibum and Jinki weren't listening to me, they were discussing over something that someone said on the radio which was convenient for me. I was just looking out the window and watched the city pass us by, a few people here and there. A lot of people were out, but I didn't bother much about them. Instead I tried to see others, people that not everyone could see … people like Kim. Someone that might be dressed like him, someone that would walk within in the crowd without anyone noticing, basically, just someone different than everyone else.
But there was no-one. Not a single one that was different. Everyone looked normal, looked usual, there was no-one that had a presence like Kim had had.

“Taemin-ah, are you even listening?” when I felt my uncle's hand on my knee I looked up and pulled myself out of my thoughts. Kibum was looking at me with a soft smile and his head tilted to the side. Since I hadn't even heard the first question I asked him to repeat it. Turned out he just wanted to know what I wanted to eat. I shrugged it off and said that I was fine with anything basically, but when both, he and Jinki insisted, that I chose I just said the first thing that came to my mind and hoped the conversation would be done with that. They offered to take me to the supermarket with them and at first I refused, but then I thought of something – if I wanted to find someone different then a crowd of people would be the best place to look.
And that's how I ended up going to the supermarket with my uncle and Jinki.

“Your taste .” Kibum said and raised his brows. He was waving the box of brown rice in front of Jinki's face. “We'll buy the other one.”

“Don't be like that.” Jinki rolled his eyes and gave him a weird look. He grabbed the box from him and put it into the cart only to have it be taken out again by Kibum. “I like the other one better. You know that.” just when Kibum was about to say something to that I sighed in annoyance and cut in: “I can't believe you're discussing about brown and white rice.” they looked at me in surprise since I hadn't spoken for easily half an hour but then both of them started laughing and just decided to buy both. I couldn't really care less which type of rice they would buy, but I really wanted to get out of this department store because there was literally no-one around.
We eventually continued walking and headed to the sea food department where there was a big crowd. I couldn't help but to smirk when I saw most people standing over at the containers that contained lobsters. “Uncle?” I looked up at Kibum and tugged on his sleeve. “I wanna go and see the lobsters …”

“Alright.” he nodded and glanced over at the containers. “Don't talk to strangers though. And wait by the containers. We'll come pick you up there.”

“Okay.” I smiled at him and hurried off quickly. While I walked I already took a close look at everyone around me, but didn't see anyone with a similar presence like Kim. There were lots of kids around, but neither of them seemed even remotely similar to him. Everyone had black hair, but that was normal, and was wearing normal clothes, not like Kim who had worn a simple white shirt, ripped pants and had been bare footed.
I squeezed into the crowd to get to the containers with the lobsters since I would have a good view over everyone from there. But still, even when I was in the front and took a thorough look at everyone, there was still no-one that stuck out to me. It was really disappointing.

Was Kim really that extraordinary?

I stood in front of the container and watched the lobsters in the water. They looked cute with their whiskers and their pincers and everytime one of them was taken out of the water I felt sad, knowing that it was going to be sold and cooked soon. I enjoyed watching them anyway though. It took my mind off of things, at least for the moment.

How was I going to figure this out … where could I possibly find proof that Kim hadn't been just part of my imagination?

When Kibum and Jinki picked me up at the lobster containers I was in deep thought again. Jinki had to shake me to regain my senses and it was only then that I realized that they were actually present. They were worried about me, but I just continued to insist that I was alright. Even though they didn't seem to believe at all they let it be and we continued shopping for groceries. All together it was very boring and I soon gave up on finding someone like Kim. It was hopeless … the way he had looked, the way he had spoken … no-one I saw today had an aura like he had had.
Once I was back in the car I went back to thinking. By now the sun was starting to set and I saw lots of people on their way home, most of them carrying grocery bags as well. Being a part of everyone heading home with grocery made me smile a little. I often tended to think of Kibum as my father instead of my actual one … Kibum just cared more.

After what felt like ages we eventually parked in front of the house my uncle lived in. It was quite a normal building where all the apartments looked the same from the outside as well as the inside. Every apartment had a small balcony and pretty much everyone used the balcony to dry laundry outside. My uncle's apartment could easily be spotted though. Since Jinki's parents had used to run a butcher shop he was very fond of barbeque and meat, so there was always a small grill on their balcony, it didn't matter which season it was. And because Kibum enjoyed gardening a lot there were a few pots with flowers on the ground and on the table they had. He mostly grew white roses and sunflowers, which I found very impressive.
I had always liked their apartment, to be honest. It was nice and clean, there weren't a lot of decorations piled up, but it was still a special place. They had a bedroom and a guest room, which had eventually become my room, as well as living room, a kitchen and a large kitchen that included a dining room. Neither of them was rich, but because they lived together they managed to afford this kind of place.

“I missed being here.” I chirped once we entered the hallway. I kicked my shoes off and carried the bag with the sea food into the kitchen, Jinki being right behind me. He laughed a bit at my comment and joked around when he replied: “This place missed you, too.” I gave him an amused look and took out the clams and the shrimps from the bag, reaching down to the freezer so I could put them in there. Jinki and I were chatting as we put away everything we had bought and I couldn't help but to chuckle when I saw the two boxes of different rice. Even when Kibum joined with the bag full of cleanser it was still fun to fool around with both of them and I laughed more than I had ever since my grandmother died.

“Hungry yet?” Kibum asked once we had stored everything away. “I could start cooking right now if you want.”

“Yes, please!” I said quickly. My stomach really was rumbling and the thought of Kimchi stew didn't make it much better. I gave him and Jinki a tight hug before grabbing my bag and heading to my room. It really was just the same as when I had left. My bed was still pushed against the wall next to the window, my desk was still a mess and the carpet was still covered in books and the sneakers I always put on when I went to dance practice. I put my bag down and smiled when I saw that my EXO poster was still hung up over my bed. EXO was pretty much the only Idol group out there that I liked, together with Infinite, because I loved their choreography and their dancing skills.

Someday I wanted to be able to dance just like they could.

After I had just organized my books for a while I stood by the window with my arms crossed. My mind was still wandering and my eyes were scanning the area around this housing estate. I was pondering on what to do next.

Was there any way I could finally find peace and stop thinking about Kim?

I had only met him a week ago and saw him for about half an hour and yet … he's become an obsession.



*



2nd chapter. I hope it is still enjoyable, thanks for your comments. They made my day!

Thanks for reading!!~