Jaejoong woken up early the next day and to his surprise, he actually had a good night sleep. He can’t tell if it’s his body finally giving out or if running into Yunho again made him more relax. Upon this thought jaejoong quickly shook his head as he stood up. The usual morning routines were hard to manage with only one arm. Taking a shower is probably the most difficult since he could not get his cast wet. After taking a shower, with his hair still dripping wet, Jaejoong wondered into the kitchen. He opened his fridge and sigh when there is nothing inside. He can’t even remember when the last time he filled his fridge with food. Jaejoong took out some instant roman noodle from the cabinet and filled it with water before placing it into the microwave.

Suddenly he heard knocking on the door.  Jaejoong ignored it and only continue to observe his noodles like it’s about to burst.

“Jaejoong…? You in there?” came Yunho’s voice

Jaejoong turn his attention to the closed door as he hears Yunho continue to bang on it without caring about the disturbance it is causing for the other residences.

“if you don’t mind, I was thinking we could have breakfast together. Many people had complemented my skills at making delicious omelet”

Jaejoong didn’t budge from where he stood. He only turns his blank expression back to the little light of his microwave. Yunho’s voice begins to fade until jaejoong is only able to hear the roaming noise from the microwave.

“jaejoong? are you in there?” Yunho continue to call out to him with no ends. Ever since he and his family moved to the country side, he had not forgotten about his friends. The reason he moved back to Seoul was to rekindle with them. Even though this was his plan, he never thought that the first friend he found would be jaejoong not to mention his odd behavior. He knew jaejoong was a stubborn boy but this is just ridicules. For one thing, Yunho can tell jaejoong is already awake due to the sound of the microwave.

After a few more attempts to get jaejoong to open his door and failed, Yunho decided to give up. He retreated back into his apartment and sigh. He wasn’t sure what happen to make Jaejoong change so much but he figures he should tried to find the others first before figuring out Jaejoong. After eating breakfast, Yunho changed his clothes as he exited his apartment and headed to his part time job he found before moving to Seoul. He locked his apartment door and glanced at Jaejoong’s door for a few seconds before turning and walking down the hallway and toward the stairs.

Jaejoong is standing on his snow cover balcony smoking his cigarette when he spotted Yunho walking away from the apartment building. His noodles were still in the microwave as it had stopped spinning and the liquid had overflowed dripping onto the tile floor below. Jaejoong couldn’t help but continue to watch as Yunho walked further and further away. He wasn’t sure how he should feel toward Yunho, it wasn’t like he hated Yunho but it wasn’t like he liked Yunho either. But then again, he isn’t even sure what emotions are anymore or if there is a need for them. To him, the more emotion you feel the more you realize how up the world really is.

After arriving at his new work place as a cashier at a local grocery store, Yunho went to greet his boss. One of the workers was assigned to help train Yunho and show him around the store.

“Lastly, this is the break room. Your schedule will be posted here every Monday. If there is a day you needed off, you should write it on this calendar so the manager knows when they are putting the schedules together” Spoke the worker name Kangin “any question?”

“How would I know what position I’ll be at when I come into work?” Yunho asked

“The manager will write it down next to your schedule date…you are to report to your assigned location at the start of your shift…”

“okay I got it” Yunho smiled

Kangin looked at Yunho for a bit before asking “I heard you just moved back to Seoul, why?”

“Let’s just say there was some unfinished business that was left here which needs to be settled”

“I see…well, if you need help with anything, please let me know”

Yunho nodded his head and thanked Kangin for showing him the ropes. After the tour, he was trained as a cashier with kangin next to him in case there were mistakes.

As the light outside begin to fade, Jaejoong had not turn on any lights except for the little TV. He sat in the dirty living room staring out the window in a world of his own. His roman noodles were still in the microwave untouched as the noodle had begun to dry up and become very soft. Just then the house phone begins to ring but he didn’t answer it. The caller was sent to voicemail after a few seconds. A beep was heard before a male’s voice appears.

“Jaejoong…this is your uncle…I was wondering if you will like to come over for dinner tonight? Your aunt is making your favorite dish…” there was a long silence before he continues “…the hospital called me today…why didn’t you tell them that you still have me and your aunt…we would have come right away if they would have called us that you fell from the rooftop…do you know how scare I was when the doctor told me you had fallen from a 5 story building? I thought my heart was going to stop. You do know how much we loved you right?....if possible I would really want to be there to help you…can’t you let us help you Jaejoong…you are the only child my sister left behind…I want to be able to give you the same kind of love your parent shower you with but I won’t be able to help you if you won’t let us inside….” Another long pause “…even though the doctor didn’t tell me the truth, I know that you didn’t accidently fall from the building…” Jaejoong could hear his uncle choking up with tears “…please….please don’t do this to yourself….i want you to live your life like everyone else your age…I’m begging you jaejoong…don’t waste the life your parent have given you…if you need help, please let me know…I’ll find you the best therapist there is out there so please…don’t do this again…” Jaejoong heard some noises in the background as his uncle bid goodbye and hang up the phone.

Jaejoong on the other hand didn’t show any response or reaction to the voicemail his uncle left behind. He only continues to stare off into space as if waiting for something to take place, waiting for death to come knocking on his door.

“Don’t do this to yourself…” a voice ringed in jaejoong’s head as he groaned in pain “…please live jaejoong…don’t dwell in the past…”

The headache was so painful that Jaejoong reached for a bottle of pain killers and pour a few into the palm of his hand. Rather than just taking one, he tossed a hand full into his mouth in hope to stop the pain.

“Don’t Jaejoong!!!...” the voice shouted loudly as Jaejoong felt an overwhelming pain as he rushed toward the bathroom and end up puking out all the pain killers.

“Live jaejoong…you must live…” the voice faded as well as the pain.

Jaejoong sat down with his back against the toilet breathing rapidly before calming down. He couldn’t figure out where the pain came from or where the voice came from. Ever since he jumped from the roof top he has been hearing this mysterious voice telling him to live.

Jaejoong stumbled out of the bathroom and toward the living room when suddenly a knock is heard at his door.

“Jaejoong? Are you in there…its Yunho…I know it’s late but I made some dinner and was wondering if you will like to join me”

Jaejoong wiped the spit from his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt as he stare at the door without any reaction. Instead he walked to the balcony and opened the door as the warm air of the apartment disappear welcoming the coldness of winter. Without wearing any shoes, he stepped into the balcony and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes and allows the wind to surround him causing his hair to sway back and forth.

Yunho tried a few more times to get jaejoong to open the door but failed. He sighs in disappointment wondering if jaejoong even remembers him at all. Maybe Yunho went through some changes and doesn’t look like how he used to. But the look in jaejoong eye’s yesterday clearly shows that he does recognize Yunho. The only thing Yunho can’t understand is why jaejoong would ignore him. Did he do something that had upset jaejoong a while back? Could he be holding a grudge against Yunho? If so, what reason would that be?

“Could it be when we were 7 and I broke his favorite toy car?” Yunho wondered to himself “jaejoong is known to hold grudges…”

After giving up, Yunho retreated to his apartment once again. He went and sat down at his dining table before eating his dinner. He tried the best he could to remember what he did to upset jaejoong but no matter what, he couldn’t recall anything that could make him so upset that he will ignore Yunho.

“I wonder if mom knows?” thought Yunho as he sticks a piece of meat into his mouth.

That night as Yunho slept in his bed he had a strange dream. He was playing in the open field with his friends. They were running around and playing while laughing. Yunho were to catch his other friends and had Eun Chae in his sight. He grinned as he chased her further and further away from the others when she suddenly stopped. Yunho nearly ran into her but luckily he was able to stop in time.

“why did you stop?” Yunho asked

Eun Chae kept her back to Yunho

“Nuna?...”

“Yunho…” she finally spoke “…I beg of you…save jaejoong?”

Her voice sounded shaky as if she is trying to hold back tears.

“Jaejoong?...” he turn around and saw jaejoong playing with the others smiling and laughing with them “jaejoong is right there and he is fine…”

Eun Chae shook her head “how could you forget?…you have to remember and make things right once again…”

He was still confuse “Nuna?...are you okay…”

Yunho walked around her until he stood in front and to his horror, Eun chae was as pale as a ghost, dripping wet and her flesh were starting to fall apart.

Yunho opened his eyes sweating like the summer heat. His heart was racing as his body shakes endlessly. He sat up and tried to catch his breath to calm his body and mind.

“What…what a nightmare?...” thought Yunho

Everything felt so real and he couldn’t understand why he would be having such a dream. He recalls Eun chae pleading with him to save jaejoong but he isn’t sure what he is saving him from? What kind of danger is jaejoong involved in?

“What am I thinking…it’s just a dream…jaejoong is perfectly fine…” thought Yunho as he went back to sleep. However the feeling of something possibly be wrong still lingers making Yunho unable to sleep.

The next morning after having his breakfast, Yunho gather his trash and exited his apartment. He headed down the stairs to dump his trash at the large green trash can outside. The morning wasn’t as cold as last night as the sun has begun to make its appearance. The grey clouds that have been hanging over the city for a few weeks begin to part showing the blue sky.

“Looks like it will be a little bit warmer this week” he thought happily to himself

He turns around and looked up before notice jaejoong standing on his balcony smoking. Yunho notice that jaejoong likes to stand on his balcony a lot, not only to smoke. To Yunho it seems as if he’s always in a world of his own, constantly staring out into the horizon waiting for something to happen. Suddenly he recalls his dream last night and seeing jaejoong on the balcony makes him uneasy.

“Morning Jaejoong!!” he shouted

Jaejoong looked down upon hearing his name and notice Yunho standing by the trash can smiling and waving at him. He can’t help but wonder what Yunho is planning. Ever since he came back to Seoul he has not left jaejoong alone. Always constantly knocking at his door, talking to him through his close door, asking him to eat dinner or go hang out. Jaejoong wondered if Yunho have really forgotten what took place when they were 8. At the thought of Yunho forgetting Eun chae and forgetting the scar he caused him made jaejoong irritated. He tosses his cigarette to the ground before retreating back into his apartment without a reply to Yunho below.

“This isn’t good…it must have been something worst then breaking his favorite toy to have him treat me so coldly” thought Yunho before sighing “this isn’t going to be easy at all…maybe I really do have to call mom…”

Jaejoong walked into his room as he laid on his bed staring into the ceiling. His little birds begin to chirps and flap their wings while flying around. He couldn’t help but recall that cheerful, stress free smile of Yunho and slowly jaejoong begin to develop this hatred, this loathsome toward Yunho. How is it that he is free to forget while Jaejoong is to be tormented constantly every day? How is this fair?

Upon that question jaejoong chuckled “I’m beginning to act like a spoil child…by now I should have known, life is a …”

Later that day, after finishing his shift at work, Yunho decided to buy some few things for dinner tonight. He is determine to make the best dish and have Jaejoong join him so he can apologize for whatever he did to make jaejoong so angry.

“you are Yunho right?” one of the customer came up to him and asked

Yunho only nodded his head in response

“My name is Lee sungmin…I also live in the same apartment as you in room 204…” he spoke happily “I saw you move in but I have been so busy that I didn’t get a chance to welcome you”

“Don’t worry about it…” Yunho return the smile

Sunmin looked at Yunho a bit making him uncomfortable before leaning closer with a grin on his face.

“so…how is it living next door to the ice princess?” he asked

Yunho only raise an eyebrow upon the word “ice princess”

“Why would a princess live in that cheap apartment?” Yunho asked

Sungmin only sigh “I’m talking about your neighbor Kim Jaejoong…we refer him as the ice princess”

Yunho couldn’t help but chuckled at the fact that even now Jaejoong is still being referred as a princess. back when they were still in grade school, Yunho use to call him that and it quickly catch on with the rest of the class.

“That kim Jaejoong is so beautiful…but like the old saying goes, everything that is beautiful is bound to have a few thorns…”

“What do you mean?”

“well…Jaejoong doesn’t come out of his apartment much and doesn’t socialize with anyone…When you try to talk to him, he just give you the cold shoulder or acted as if you were even there….and…” he leans toward Yunho “according to the guy who use to live in your apartment…Jaejoong is a masochist…”

Yunho end up choking on his own spit at that thought of Jaejoong being a masochist. From what he remembers, Jaejoong hate pains.

“at night jaejoong will bring in a random guy and let’s just say it ain’t no gently ….the guy can hear everything that goes on in Jaejoong’s apartment because the wall isn’t that thin…and when his partner leaves, you can see bruise and marks all over his body…that is no way to have a steady relationship if you ask me…”

Yunho did not say a word, he continue to wonder if this is some sick joke or if Jaejoong have really turn to the pleasure of pain.

Jaejoong was in his room staring off into space as usual when a knock came upon the door. He got up and walked toward the door and opens it without even verifying who the guest might be. Standing at his door step is a tall muscular man with board shoulder.  He looked at Jaejoong with total lust in his eyes as he his lips.

“Hello there darling…” he spoke

“Not tonight…” Jaejoong was going to close the door when the taller man stopped him forcing the door open.

“Sorry but it is not your call…don’t forget, I get to decide when I can you without any complaints…”

Jaejoong wasn’t in the mood for nor could he do much with only one hand. He was going to refuse when the image of Yunho flashed before his eyes.

“Alright…but don’t expect much since I only have one hand to use…”

“That’s fine by me…” the tall man spoke as he enters the apartment.

The smell and the look of Jaejoong’s apartment did not affect him at all. He has gotten used to it after spending many nights in this filthy place. Jaejoong lead his partner into the bedroom and without even waiting for him to undress, his partner had already grasped him and pull him close. He kissed Jaejoong as hard as he could as if he’s trying to swallow him whole.  After stripping him, his partner kissed him all over and gripped his broken arm tightly. Jaejoong groan in pain as his partner forced his arm over his head causing the cast to move making it painful. His partner didn’t care about his wellbeing; he only cares about satisfying his desire. He does what he wants to and Jaejoong didn’t protest or complain the more he corporates the sooner this ordeal will be over. As his partner forcefully into him, he moans both in pain and pleasure. He was feeling pain all over his body but he didn’t care, the more pain there is the more alive he will feel. This violent and aggressive continues for who knows how many rounds. By the time his partner left, Jaejoong was already exhausted to the point of fainting. There were kiss marks all over, red marks from being held so tight and bite marks that nearly tore his skin. He sat there up against his small bed breathing heavily while trying to calm his aching body. Jaejoong finally lifted his head and to his surprise someone was standing in front of him. It was a young girl dressed in her beautiful blue summer dress. She looked at him with such pity and sympathy that it actually hurt. There were so many mix emotions from her expression including anger, disappointment and sadness.

“Eun Chae?...” Jaejoong whispered her name

A single tear dropped from her eyes before she vanished leaving jaejoong along once again. He couldn’t help but chuckled like a mad man.

“I must be going insane…” he thought to himself

Yunho stood in his apartment still in total shock. He had come home in hope to make a special dinner and invite Jaejoong over but instead here he stand in total disbelief. When Sungmin say the wall was thin, he didn’t belief him until now. Yunho could feel his body heating up, not from embarrassment that he heard them making out but rather from the thought that Jaejoong will subject himself to abuse. He clinched his fist tightly enough to draw blood. He wanted nothing more than to rush over there, kick down the door and smack some sense into Jaejoong.  He recalls when they were still in grade school, playing in the playground during a warm summer day. Yunho wasn’t allowed to join the other kids because he had broken his leg a few days ago. It was Jaejoong who chose to sit with him under the tree rather than having fun like the others. He was glowing with light and warmth with a smile that brings happiness to a person. He was so cute, so beautiful, gentle and pure. The thought that the Jaejoong he remembers is no longer the same irritates him. It makes him wonder what could have changed him. What could have impacted him so much that he will make a turn for the worst? All kind of questions filled his mind but there were no answers. Yunho looked out the window and now the snow has begun to fall. Jaejoong also notice the snow as he got up and walked toward the window. He placed his hand upon the glass and felt the piercing coldness upon his skin. He doesn’t understand it but the coldness of winter calm his body, his mind and his heart. It acts like a freezing device putting everything within him on hold. Numbing all his thoughts so he could no longer think, no longer remember the pain, the suffering and the desire to escape. The only thing he could concentrate on is the coldness that he entering his body.

to be continue..................