~*~

Chapter V

Being Free

5월 19일

Ring… ring…

Dongwoo groaned as his phone started ringing, jarring him out of his sleep.

“Hyung, it’s your phone.  Are you going to answer it?” Hoya asked.

He groaned again and threw his blankets over his head again, shutting out all the noise.  “I don’t want to,” Dongwoo muttered into his pillow. 

Hoya laughed and reached over Dongwoo to grab his phone.

“Yeobeseyo?” Hoya answered the phone for Dongwoo.

Dongwoo started to drift off ignoring Hoya on his phone as best as possible.  He and Myungsoo were always the heaviest sleepers in Infinite, their managers and the other memebers always spending the most time waking them up in the morning.  Sungjong, back in their first dorm, would call Dongwoo and Myungsoo’s shared room the Graveyard Room as they both slept as though they were dead.

“No, it’s Hoya,” Hoya was saying on the phone.  “He’s sleeping, of course… I’ll get him for you.”

Dongwoo heard some shuffling around and the bed sank as Hoya knelt on his bed.  Suddenly, Dongwoo was tumbling off the side of the bed as Hoya shoved him as hard as he could off the bed.  “Dongwoo-hyung.  Wake up.  The phone’s for you.  Myungsoo’s mom is asking for you.”

“Huh?” Dongwoo muttered, mostly still asleep.  Hoya tackled Dongwoo and pinned him against the floor, shoving the phone against his ear.

“Myungsoo’s mother,” he repeated, getting off of Dongwoo and sitting back.

Dongwoo sat up, rubbing his eyes.  “Yeobeseyo?”

“Hello, Dongwoo, I was wondering if you knew where Myungsoo is.”

He shook his head.  “What do you mean?  Is he not at the hospital?”

“He’s not here, he let a message saying that you would know where he is.”

Dongwoo waved off Hoya who was trying to get the phone back.  “I don’t know, I’m just at the dorm, I haven’t talked to Myungsoo since …” he trailed off as he realized where Myungsoo could be.  “Wait, I know where he is,” he exclaimed excitedly as he jumped out of the bed and shrugged on a jacket and a pair of jeans, his sleepiness out the window.

“Dongwoo, do you know if he’s okay or…”

“I’ll go get him, he’s okay, I’m sure of it.  Eomeoni, don’t worry, I’ll go find him.”

~*~

Dongwoo hurried through the streets, hugging his jacket closer to him as the winds blew around him.

Going down the streets, he remembered the roads that Myungsoo lead them on when Dongwoo had helped him escape the hospital a few months back.  Finally, after getting lost twice, Dongwoo arrived at Myungsoo’s hiding place.   

The stream flowed by calmly as the birds sang softly in the air.  Myungsoo was sitting on a large rock in the river bed, his back facing Dongwoo as he looked at the stream.  His camera lay on the rock beside him, but remained untouched.

Slowing down from a run, Dongwoo slowly apporached Myungsoo, trying not to slip on the way down to the bank.  “Myungsoo-yah,” he called softly.

Myungsoo didn’t turn around from his crouched position by the river bed, only continuing to stare at the river by his feet.  Flailing his arms around as he nearly fell again, Dongwoo carefully sat down beside Myungsoo, crossing his legs. 

“Myungsoo, why did you run away?” Dongwoo asked, putting his hand on Myungsoo’s shoulder.  “Your mother and family are worried.”

Slowly, Myungsoo let out a slow breath and looked up to the sky.  “You know, hyung… there are four walls in room 428 at Seoul University Hospital where I’m currently living.  I’ve stared at those four walls until I memorized all of them,” he said quietly.  “They’ve trapped me in that small world for such a long time.  I just wanted to get out of there.”

Dongwoo rubbed Myungsoo’s arms, realizing that he was probably cold in his thin jacket.  “There are better places to run than away from us.”

Myungsoo laughed softly and Dongwoo pretended not to see Myungsoo wipping away a tear.  “You gave me wings to fly,” Myungsoo whispered.  “I can’t fly in the hospital though, it traps me in the past and I can’t fly there.”

He turned his gaze away from Dongwoo to down the stream.  “I like to be free for a little while.  Am I free now though?  Everything is weighing me down… the cancer, the treatment… I don’t know what to do any more.  What should I do now?  Why can’t I be free…”

Dongwoo sighed as he didn’t have an answer for Myungsoo.  “I don’t know, Myungsoo-yah,” he said truthfully.  He gently rubbed Myungsoo’s arms as he started to shiver again, not with the cold, but also with tears.  “Let’s go back to the hospital, your mother’s really worried again.”

Myungsoo shook his head, resisting Dongwoo’s attempts to get him up. “No, hyung, please, not right now.  I don’t want to be caged again, I want to be free for a bit longer.”

Trying his best not to cry, Dongwoo pulled Myungsoo up to his feet.  “Let’s get back to the hospital, okay?” Dongwoo said, having to sniffle a little bit to keep his tears back.  “We can’t have you getting sick again.”

He tried his best to stop Dongwoo’s attempts, but his soft words and warm hand won out in the end and he followed Dongwoo.  As they walked together back to the train station, Myungsoo started to shiver in the wind as he was only wearing a thin bunnyhug and jeans.  Dongwoo took off the jacket he was wearing and drapped it on Myungsoo’s shoulders.

“You’ll be cold then, hyung,” Myungsoo mumbled, his voice just as tired as his steps.

“I’ll be fine,” Dongwoo said.  I don’t need a jacket to be warm.  This is what I could do for you when I’m taking away your freedom…

Just before they entered the subway station, Myungsoo stopped and looked up at the pale sky once more.

“What are you doing?” Dongwoo asked.

“Memorizing the sky,” Myungsoo whispered, his eyes flickering over the sky again.  “But that’s impossible, isn’t, hyung?  The sky will keep on changing, it’ll never stay the same.  How can I be trying to memorize the sky?  Am I trying to remember yesterday?  Am I trying to remember what it is like to be free?”

Dongwoo went back to Myungsoo’s side and turned him so that he was able to see his face.  Myungsoo’s eyes were bright with tears, his bottom lips was trembling with barely contained tears.  Even though tears ran down Dongwoo’s cheeks, Dongwoo hugged him tightly, trying to hug away his tears.  “You’re already free.  Please remember you’re free.”

Myungsoo only let out a little sob, clutching nearly desperately onto Dongwoo as he cried into his shoulder.  He patted the back of Myungsoo’s head, calming his tears.  “Look up at the sky now, Myungsoo,” he whispered.  “Soon, you’ll be able to fly if you want, or walk under the sky, but the important thing is that you’ll be free.”

“Promise?” Myungsoo asked, his voice smaller than he had ever heard it.  “Can you promise that I’ll be free?”

Dongwoo closed his eyes and nodded.  “I promise.” 

~*~

5월 20일

There was a pile of mush on the tray for lunch. 

“It’s supposed to be rice and chicken,” Woohyun supplied, looking at the menu that came with the meal. 

Myungsoo scowled at him, unhappily looking back at his lunch.  Picking up the disposable wooden chopsticks, he snapped them apart with so much force that he nearly broke them and looked at the tray with a look of distaste as if he didn’t want food again.

“What’s wrong, Myungsoo?” Woohyun asked, suddenly concerned about his mood. Myungsoo would never turn down a meal, he would always need a meal before he wants to do anything. 

But Myungsoo shook his head and postitioned his chopsticks over the rice, but he sighed again and lowered his hand.

“What is it, Myungsoo?”  Woohyun asked again.

“I don’t want to eat this,” Myungsoo admitted.  “It tastes…”  He sighed and shook his head, putting down the chopsticks by the plate.

Woohyun picked up the chopsticks and took a bite of the half cold rice. “Oh…”  He put the chopsticks down.  “The rest of the meal doesn't taste that bad?”

Myungsoo shrugged.  “It all tastes bad, hyung,” he said.  “Except for the pudding.”

Woohyun laughed and handed him the pudding.  “Then eat up well.”

Myungsoo smiled and twirled the container of pudding around in his hand. His eyes were sad even if his mouth was smiling.  “Maybe later,” he said, putting it down on the tray again.

Woohyun nodded slowly.  He wanted to tell Myungsoo to eat, to gain back the weight that the days in the hospital had taken away from him and to start fighting again, but he kept his mouth shut, he knew that Myungsoo just needed time.

“Aish,” Myungsoo sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.  “I really want to go eat bulgogi.”

Woohyun smiled, sadly and happily at the same time.  For the first time in a long time, Myungsoo had made a comment about food.  Food would probably be the last thing on Myungsoo’s mind when he was throwing up again. 

“Tell you what,” Woohyun whispered gently.  “When you get out of here, hyung will buy for you.”

“You will?” Myungsoo looked at him, slightly disbelievingly, but as hopeful as he could ask for.

Woohyun nodded.  “Hyung will buy for you,” he promised.  “We’ll go out and eat meat until you can’t eat any more.”

Myungsoo smiled.  “Can we take the others with us?”

“Of course,” Woohyun said gently.  “Whatever you want.”

~*~

5월 21일

Woohyun came into Myungsoo’s hospital room, tucking away his earphones with his phone into his pocket when he realized something was wrong.  It wasn’t obvious that something was wrong, especially to anyone else, but Woohyun wasn’t anyone else.  Since Myungsoo was diagnosed, the other six members of Infinite had developed a sixth sense, they could sense when Myungsoo was unwell by just coming into the room. 

“Myungsoo?” he called out, hurrying towards his bed.  “What happened?”

Myungsoo’s eyes were closed, but when he heard Woohyun’s voice, they slowly fluttered open.  With a weak smile and an even weaker voice, Myungsoo asked, “How did you know?”

Woohyun frowned, reaching out to place a hand on Myungsoo’s forehead.  Most of the time, Myungsoo would swat his hand away, but this time, Myungsoo allowed him to place a hand on his forehead, relaxing into his cold hand.  Woohyun nearly jerked his hand away at the heat rising off of Myungsoo’s skin.  Still, he kept his hand on Mungsoo’s cheek as Myungsoo leaned into his touch. 

“I just know, okay?” Woohyun said softly. 

Myungsoo nodded, obviously too tired to care too much about why.  Woohyun sat down in a chair and took a wet cloth from the bucket on the side table.  After wringing it out, he gently patted Myungsoo’s forehead with it.  “When did you get this fever?” he asked, continuing to wipe the sweat off Myungsoo’s forehead. 

Myungso shrugged again.  “Some time… in the night, I think,” he said closing his eyes again.  “Dr. Song… said I would be okay… just need to stop running away from… the hospital.”

“That’s a good reason not to,” Woohun said, brushing Myungsoo’s hair off his forehead where it had collected in little chunks from the sweat.  “Get some sleep, okay, Myungsoo?”

Myungsoo shook his head.  “I don’t want to…”

“Why not?  You can get better if you do,” Woohyun said. 

He shook his head again, though he closed his eyes.  “Woohyun-hyung… Woohyunie… Shin Woohyun… I like Nam Woohyunie-hyung better…”

Woohyun smiled and nodded, putting down the towel he was using to wet it again.  “I like Kim Myungsoo better than Shiwoo, Secretary Gil, Lee Hyunsoo and Jiu,” he said quietly. 

Myungsoo laughed and opened his eyes again, lost in thought, but glazed with fever.  “Shin Woohyunie… and Hwang Sungyeollie, do you think there was a Song Myungsoo there too?”

Woohyun laughed.  “I’m sure there must have been.  There would have also been a Joo Sunggyu, Park Dongwoo, Kang Howon and Ahn Sungjong as well.”

Myungsoo laughed quietly, but his laugh ended in coughs.  Woohyun immediately jumped up and grabbed the cup of water off of the side table.  He carefully put his arm underneath his shoulders and supported Myungsoo as he took a drink. 

Myungsoo didn’t complain about how Woohyun was treating him like a baby.  He smiled as Myungsoo raised his hands a little as if to support the cup, but didn’t have enough energy to raise them all the way and Woohyun was holding the cup for him.  After drinking about half a cup, Myungsoo turned his head away from the cup, but a small dribble of water ran down his chin. 

Woohyun gently patted off the water and placed the cup back onto the dresser.  “You feeling okay?  Need more water?”   

Myungsoo shook his head.  “Thanks, hyung.”

“No problem,” he answered as he gently lowered Myungsoo down to the bed.  “Feeling better now?”

He nodded slowly, closing his eyes.  “Much better.”  Myungsoo’s mouth opened in a large yawn and blinked sleepily. 

“Why don’t you get some rest?” Woohyun suggested.

Myungsoo shook his head, a soft smile appearing on his face.  “I’m good for now… I want to stay awake for a little longer.”

“The doctor says that you need rest,” Woohyun said softly, running his fingers through Myungsoo’s hair, hoping to coax him to sleep.

“I’ve been resting all day,” Myungsoo said, his voice still quiet.  “I want to be awake for a little longer.”

Woohyun nodded.  “Okay.”  He gently patted away the new sweat forming across Myungsoo’s brow.  Myungsoo sighed peacefully, leaning a bit more into Woohyun’s gentle touch. 

“Hyung,” Myungsoo murmured after a slight pause.  “Could you tell me a story?”

“A story?”  Woohyun blinked, surprised.

He smiled softly, his eyes closed.  “Yes, a story.  Please?”

“What kind of story?” Woohyun asked, patting the sweat on Myungsoo’s neck and collarbones.

“I don’t really care,” Myungsoo mumbled. 

Woohyun frowned, trying to think of a story.  “How about…my birthday?”

Closing his eyes, Myungsoo smiled.  “Yes please.”

Woohyun nodded, putting down the towel to let it soak with cold water again.  “Well… I think I’ll start on New Year’s Eve,” he said.  “Dongwoo and I were going to go to watch the fireworks on the hill down the road when you asked if you could come with us…”

Woohyun continued to tell the story, going from New Year’s Eve, when they had to rush Myungsoo to the hospital, up to his birthday, when Sunggyu took Woohyun to the fair to meet up with Myungsoo.  Myungsoo kept on nodding and smiling during the story, sometimes interupting him to add something in that he forgot.  Woohyun kept a close eye on Myungsoo, watching him smile again. 

“When you said ‘happy birthday’ to me…” Woohyun said, the story coming to close.  “I really… I didn’t believe that you were there with me.  I was so happy.  It gave me so much hope to see you standing there.”

Myungsoo laughed softly, happily remembering the day that seemed like such a long time ago.  Woohyun smiled sadly, playing with the towel in his hands.  His birthday seemed like such a long time ago, all of them were happy as Myungsoo was getting released from the hospital soon.  Their little paradise faded so quickly that Woohyun hadn’t noticed that it was fading away until it was gone.

“Thanks for the story, hyung,” Myungsoo whispered, his smile never fading off of his face. 

“Why don’t you go to sleep now?” Woohyun suggested quietly, pulling the blanket higher up onto Myungsoo.

Myungsoo nodded, his eyes closing slowly.  “You’ll get some sleep too, hyung, right?” he mumbled as sleep started to take over.

Woohyun smiled. “Of course.  Now get some sleep.  Sweet dreams.”

Myungsoo’s breath started to even out, finally giving into sleep.  Woohyun gently put his hand on Myungsoo’s forehead, checking his fever.  Even though it was still there, his skin wasn’t burning like it was before.  Woohyun smiled and placed the cloth on Myungsoo’s forehead, just in case.  A thought occurred to him as he watched Myungsoo slip closer to sleep. 

“On New Year’s Eve, when we went out to the fireworks, what did you write on the sky candle?” he asked quietly. 

Myungsoo lips turned up into a smile and his hand found Woohyun’s, holding him close.  He reached up and brought Woohyun closer to whisper in his ear. 

“It’s a secret…” 

Hi~  I meant to update a bit earlier, but I couldn't connect to AFF, so I went to do homework and that took a bit longer than expected.  

Any how, I hope you liked this chapter!  DongSoo angst/fluff/thing... DongSoo is like Squishy and his Fluffy Hyung.  Too cute to handle sometimes.  ^o^  And Woohyun and Myungsoo's story comes to a pretty much fill circle now! 

I'll update Sea of Gold soon, I haven't updated it for a little while now, sorry.  I've been trying to work on the next chapters, but I've had school and my muse is MIA right now.   It's gone and it's getting lonely here~ I need it back! *dorawajwo, I want you back, back, back, back back~* 

So, I changed my username from WhereTheAngelsFly to tokkeiko.  Do you like it?  

Annyeong!  Give me lots of comments please!  And upvotes too please! And cookies~  ❤❤