Last week was a hell of a week. 

Eun Sang's name had been ringing in my head all day, all week:

Eun Sang's not eating.

Eun Sang's not sleeping.

Eun Sang's alone.

Eun Sang's talking to no one. 

Eun Sang, Eun Sang, Eun Sang.

Even Chan Young, he had ceased in following and asking Eun Sang how she was and what happened. He had stopped assisting her, helping her, trying to start a conversation with her. Not that he grew tired, but because she told him to. 

I thought she would put me to exemption, after what had happened between us before. I thought she'd trust me. I thought I've done enough to make her lean onto me when Tan's away. 

I guess I thought wrong. 

It has been a week since Eun Sang told me that Tan will only be here once. Tan was never like that to the ones he love. He was never the kind of guy who says "business first before love." He would always put Eun Sang first. Well, that is what I knew. 

He has changed.

A lot. 

Eun sang was more like a ghost that wanders around.

I worry about her too much. I can't help it.

I am afraid that Eun Sang would faint anytime due to lack of sleep, of food, of energy, of everything. It is too obvious. Everyone could see it. The shadows under her eyes grew darker each day, her cheeks, hollow. I have been following her eveyday, even now, as she walked slowly and silently. The door exits to the same wash area. The place was eerily quiet and deserted. 

"Young Do." She says as her walking halted. 

It was the first thing she's said. 

"Please," she composes herself. "I want to be --"

"Alone?" I finish her sentence. "Five days of being alone isn't enough?!" I yank her arm so she could face me. "You're punishing yourself too much even though none of this is your fault! Your friends, they are all worried. Chan Young has done everything, but even his presence cannot satisfy you, and you know what? He's not very happy about it. Even Bo-na, she won't stop thinking on how to get you back. You yourself know that for the past days I've been following you, but you didn't do anything about it." I say breathlessly. "How could you not think about us when all that we care about is you! Are you that selfish?" I didn't realize that my voice has risen. I step back and let her arm go. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so hard on you."

She shakes her head. "You're right. I am selfish. I didn't think about Chan Young. He was with me almost half of my life but I can't be a friend to him. And Bo-na. And you." Her voice cracks as she speaks. "Sorry." 

Now I feel guilty. It was not really that I concerned with neither Chan Young and Bo-na, but I was rather talking about myself. 

Now who is the selfish one again? A voice in my head speaks.

"You have no idea," I start, "how hard this is for me."

She looks up at me, "Young Do, what are you saying?"

"I... " 

No, this is not the right time to say it. I can't score on her while Tan is gone. That's not playing fair, Young Do. 

Man up!

"When you cry, I feel like it's my fault. It has been a mark on me, that every student that cries in this school is because of my doing. I punish myself for that. And then, you, don't make me do something I shouldn't do." This is me, playing safe, but let me tell you that is partially true.

"I didn't think that I could affect you that much." She says. She had dropped her voice. 

"Well, I.. It's not that, but, well, I-uh," I scratch my head. At a distance not too far, I think I saw someone. 

Kim Tan.

Or maybe I've imagined it, because he is gone as soon as I fixed my eye on that area. I see Eun Sang following my gaze. 

"What are you looking at?"

I'm too focused to reply. 

"Choi Young Do!" I looked at her. "Everything alright?" She asks.

"Yeah, I'll meet you in the convenience store after school. I- I think I forgot something." I didn't wait for her answer, instead, I ran as fast as I could to catch up with Tan.

I know it's him.

--

I stopped in a curb where I last hear the footsteps. 

I was right.

"Are you flirting with her or is she flirting with you?" He greets.

He is too much.

--

And All I could remember was the blur of the events...