Chapter Seven: Make Up for the Ruined Makeup

Almost a million words that I can say, but none of them will do.

Mi Ja jerks her head to the beat once the chorus hits. She doesn’t hum, though, like how she usually does. Or to be truthful—she can’t, because when she attempted to do so earlier, she receives a slap on the back from Soojung. By the time they finally wore their bikinis and topped it with oversized shirts, Soojung and Mi Ja’s moods have been in synchronization. Unlike their behaviors earlier in the bus, a very prickly Mi Ja and an annoyingly grumpy Soojung.

They’re both propped on the cloth veiling their skins from the grainy texture of the sand while facing the sea dotted with familiar figures. Mi Ja and Soojung both sit under the large beach umbrella they rented few minutes earlier, and somehow, Mi Ja finds it annoying that Soojung looked so excited when they arrived but she doesn’t even step outside the umbrella, as if she was a vampire who’s ‘allergic’ to sun. (Mi Ja prefers the term allergic because it seems more human, even if Soojung doesn’t really seem human to her.)

Mi Ja continuously gapes at Soojung, half admiring her ceaseless beauty and half stabbing her right eye mentally out of mere irritation. Soojung’s wearing her usual face again, and because Mi Ja feels her mood getting wrecked just by looking at her face, and in an instant, both of their moods turn sour again. Soojung then snaps at her, not failing to notice Mi Ja’s sharp glares, “I know I’m beautiful but stop staring at me as if you’re me.”

“Excuse you, I was in the middle of judging you,” says Mi Ja, which isn’t completely false. Then she continues, this time, with a bit of composition in her voice, “Hey, ice queen, why aren’t you swimming?”

“I could ask the same question to you, too, no?” Soojung counters. Before their conversation sparks up into something unpleasant again, they both get astounded by the husky yell resonating from behind them at the same time Mi Ja’s lips part to say something back. They both swivel their heads to the direction of the voice and the sound of a pair of feet grinding against the sand heavily; only to find Taehyung running and stumbling and making his way towards them. At first, they didn’t understand what he had shouted first, but now, it’s all clearer. He was actually shouting Mi Ja’s name.

“Mi Ja,” he mumbles her name, almost muffled between pants, as he finally reaches their spot. He places his hand on Mi Ja’s shoulders and lets the silence hang around in the atmosphere for a short while. She tries not turning her head sideways to meet his eyes, as she already knows who it is; but somehow, there’s a magnet pulling hers into his deep brown orbs. They meet eyes, and when they do, it seems like his eyes want to tell her something, tell her the words trying to break free from his throat.

And as if Soojung realizes that the two needed privacy, she stands up and says, “I’m going to take a dip. Good luck, ugly woman.” With that, she slowly marches towards the shore, removing her shirt to unveil her maroon-shaded bikini. Taehyung thinks that Soojung probably got the idea and sensed that he has been itching to ask her if she could spare him a few minute from Mi Ja’s time. He’s not completely wrong though, and not completely correct either. Soojung just doesn’t want to see Mi Ja looking completely like a girl in love with her sparkling eyes looking up to him. It’s disgusting, she thinks.

Mi Ja crosses her arms and leans on the pole of the beach umbrella, and she tries her best not to unbalance it with her weight. Taehyung doesn’t say anything, doesn’t do anything but to stare at her. Mi Ja, then, stretches her arms upward before folding her knees up to her chest. She rests her chin on her knees and looks over at Taehyung. He still doesn’t say anything. Silence. Now, she understands why people use to tell her that silence is torture whenever unwanted. The situation is exactly like that, now. Mi Ja sighs, giving up to Taehyung, “Listen, Taehyung, I am not—” Angry? I may be not. Mad? Madly in love, perhaps.

“You are,” Taehyung states blankly, “I can feel it.”

Mi Ja furrows her eyebrows at him. She feels as if Taehyung doesn’t want to listen because the way he immediately replies and cuts her off make it seems as if he’s trying to stop her from adding up another statement that could worsen their situation. Did Taehyung give up listening to her? Because if he already has given up, Mi Ja wouldn’t be surprised at all. Maybe she actually expected it, because Jinri’s already in his life.

“I swear,” Mi Ja heaves out another exasperated sigh, “I’m not mad.”

“True?” Taehyung raises his eyebrow at her, speculating if she’s telling the truth. She is, honestly, because instead of feeling maddened by the fact that he was with Jinri when he’s supposed to be with Mi Ja on her birthday, she feels lonely. Like her heart just broke into two and she tried reassembling it, but she can’t find the other one anywhere and she breaks down into loud sobs out of forlorn. She feels incomplete.

But Taehyung knows more than she ever assumed. Judging by her tone, looking at her eyes, and watching all her gestures; Taehyung knows that she feels isolated, like there’s already a wall between them that surged upwards in a matter of hours of not remembering her birthday. He knows what he did, or maybe what he never did, is cruel. And he’s trying to face everything now, trying to apply bandage to something that may have been broken completely. He cups her cheek and says gently, eyes delving deeply into her abyss of emotions, “Now, listen to me, Mi Ja. There’s one thing you’re probably not aware of. Junmyeon knows this. My dad knows this. My whole family knows this. Your family knows this. And it may be time for you to know about it. I love you, Mi Ja, in case you’re being so dense.”

Now, Mi Ja gets dumbfounded. Her body stays stable, only her chest moves up and down for breathing abnormally. The walls of her eyes give in and she breaks down into tears, and at the same time, her heart crumbles out all her feelings of remorse about what has happened. She croaks, hugging her knees closer to her, “Why did you even forget?”

“I’m sorry.” Taehyung chooses not to say it out loud, only letting his mind hear all his honest responses. He only has to listen to her and not counter her words for this moment. His sin is a bit grand for him to justify himself when he knows Mi Ja didn’t really do anything; and that’s one of the problem, she didn’t do anything. At all. Not to remind him of her birthday, not to act like a hard-to-get girl, not to give him hints of her assumptions. Not any, and because of that, they’re now sitting on the Jungmun [1] beach, side by side, while she’s bawling her eyes out.

“Why did you look so happy while I cried my soul out?”

“I didn’t know, I didn’t know at all.” Taehyung pulls her in for a hug and rubs her back for comfort. He can no longer hold it in. How long has it been since he’s hugged Mi Ja this warmly? This tightly? This beautifully? How long did it take for their embrace to finally make Taehyung realize that he really, really, really loves Mi Ja? He hums to her hair, placing his chin on the top of her head and listens intently.

“Why did you present to her an extremely extravagant gift for just a normal date?”

“It’s not just a normal date, but… Mi Ja, I’m really sorry.” He doesn’t even know how to respond, so before he tries reasoning out, his conscience puts a halt on him. Her sobs keep on coming, tragically messing up Taehyung’s state of mind as he doesn’t know what to do anymore. And the next string of words that escaped her lips doesn’t do anything to ease his minds down.

“Will you ever leave me?”

“I will never,” Taehyung pulls her away before looking at her, fixating his eyes on every angle of her tear-drenched face, and then he shows a sincere smile. She returns his gaze and reflects his smile, partly showing that she’s feeling a tad better after unloading the heavy load of scurrying emotions inside her and partly just simply catching Taehyung’s happiness like a disease—a sweet one.

“I’m sorry for acting like a drama queen,” Mi Ja breathes in a sniffle as she looks down to her lap. She can feel hot liquid seeping out from her nose and she heaves her hand up to wipe for it. Her tears hurt her cheeks a bit, maybe because they’ve already dried up due to the cold sea breeze. Taehyung chuckles slightly then reaches for his face. He wipes her eyes and nose with his jacket sleeve.

Stunned and a bit embarrassed that she actually put snot on his clothes—well, it’s actually Taehyung who opted to do that—she tries catching his hand as she lifts her body a bit. She fails, as it is to be expected, making Taehyung laugh and seeing this as an opportunity, he pulls Mi Ja in for a hug. He slams his back on the ground, pulling Mi Ja down with him, while laughing with her. He says, in gaps of being able to speak despite the contagious laughter they share, “Hey, we should sneak out of this place.”

Before her mind could process this statement properly, Mi Ja stands up and squints her eyes, “I bet you want to try the Lava Flow, huh? I remember how you had to hide from your mother the receipt of purchases back then. You, sir, are a Lava Flow maniac.”

“You think you’re right?” he smirks.

“Oh sure, I am,” Mi Ja grimaces at him, “Don’t try to deny it, mister. If I’m correct, you better treat me out because you missed my birthday.” She faintly feels a twinge of pain inside her, but she brushes it off and laughs at him. He furrows his eyebrows and sneers at her, again.

“And if you’re wrong?”

“Name your price,” she puts up her hand in a provoking tone, although she’s slightly confident