Taemin PoV

My hands were holding a framed picture tightly - our last picture together. It was still early in the morning, around 6'O clock. Tears were b my eyes and I was trying to hold them in.

"Happy birth–" Jonghyun dragged after seeing me stand by the window, gripping the picture tight. Tears flowed out from my eyes at his words and I threw the picture on the floor hard, breaking it into pieces. My legs gave in as I went down to my knees, covering my face and sobbing shakily. To me, it was the most depressing day of my whole 21 years of life. I couldn't smile truly after her death, my first, true love's death. And it was my first birthday without her in three years.

/Flashback - Previous birthday/

We were walking through the bustling streets of Gagnam, hands linked and a genuine smile plastered to our faces. Jaerim was pointing at each store and laughing heartily - I just looked at her, my heart swelling with happiness. Soon, the time came for her to go to her house. 

"Tae oppa, as your birthday gift, I promise you we will be togther, forever. No one can change that" She said as she held my hands.

"Eyy~ Only that? I thought you would've prepared something!"

"Isn't this enough?"

I leaned in to kiss her lips, but she pushed me and walked backwards at the zebra crossing, seeing me.

"Not today, next time okay?? Annye- AH!" She waved at me, but in a split second, she was not in the spot. A few feet away from the crossing, she was lying still in a pool of blood. Her hands twitched but suddenly stopped. A crowd gathered over the spot. I made my way inside the crowd, still unable to process what happened. My legs went weak as I saw her, falling down to my knees. I was frozen. I could care less about a scandal now. I slowly took her in my arms and held her closely to my chest, crying loudly.

"Jaerim! Jae see me!! Please.. p-lease!!! Open your eyes!!!" I cried over her. Some one took her away from my arms and placed her on a cot. Thy tried to revive her. I just stood frozen at my spot, seeing her jump up when they took off the defibrillators from her neckline. They tried it one more time and finally shook their heads, telling she cannot be revived. Someone pulled me to the back and I turned to see my manager dragging me away from the crowd and shoving me inside the car, deiving away from the place.

/End of Flashback/

I felt someone hug me and comfort me as I cried uncontrollably. My body was shaking and my lips let out shaky sobs each time I hiccuped. 

"Why did you leave me?!? Why did you break you promise to me?!" I screamed. The person hugged me tighter and patted my back, comforting me tenderly. I looked up and saw Jonghyun looking at me with caring eyes. I pulled myself away from as I stopped crying.

"Taemin ah.... don't be like this" Jonghyun said. I smiled weakly at him before going through my wardrobe when a t-shirt caught my eye - a black t-shirt, with a heart symbol. Her favourite shirt. I smiled at the thought as I pulled it out with a pair of blue jeans. Jonghyun went out and I locked my door, dressing up. I got out and went out of the dorm, to the car. Driving it towards the graveyard,  I stopped and bought white tulips for her. At reaching the place, I took the bouquet and went inside the grave, stopping before one tomb.

In the loving memory of

Han Jaerim

04.12.1992 - 07-18-2013

I knelt down and kept the bouquet on top of the slab.

"Jaerim ah... how are you??" I asked to the slab, chuckling to myself. It felt funny, talking to someone who's not alive.

"I'm wearing your favourite shirt today.." I trailed off. A tear drop fell out of my eyed and grew into a stream of tears. I hung my head, the tears falling on my knees.

"You promised we'll be togther, forever... Why did you break it??" I cried. Soon people crowded the perimeter of the graveyard, seeing me inside. I got up and ran outside to the car and started it, driving towards our dorm. On the way, my eyes recognised the places me and Jaerim went together. I cried all the way at the memories. I entered the dorm, seeing it all decorated and a large ' Happy Birthday' banner stuck to the wall. I squinted my eyes in confusion when a scream made me jump out of my skin.

"Happy birthday!!!!!" The four hyungs shouted, Onew holding a big yellow cake. I smiled short as they placed the cake on a small table. My mind flashed pictures of how she arranged a surprise party for my birthday. Tears flowed out from my eyes again, but I didnt care to wipe it. I stood there, frozen at my spot. Someone pulled me to a hug, but I pushed the person and ran into my room, locking it firmly. My cried became louder as I threw everything away - framed pictures, bed sheets, books, and many other things. I fell down to my knees and curled up into a ball, hugging a leftover picture of Jaerim. I slowly fell asleep on the floor, my hands gripping the picture tightly.