I can’t believe it! I was finally in front of the arena where WINNER will be performing in approximately one and a half hours. I couldn’t contain my excitement and the huge grin I was wearing just wouldn’t leave my face.

It’s a shame I didn’t get to arrive earlier although it was what I had originally planned. I wanted to scour all the stands that were selling WINNER goodies all around the arena, now I only have time to look through a few because I was late because my human alarm clock has chosen to remain at Busan and let me go to WINNER’s concert all by my lonesome. She wanted to be with her family longer, she had said. Oh well, she has always been the better daughter between us two.

After buying a new lightstick, 7 posters (two of Seunghoon and one of the other members and one group poster), a hoodie and a beanie, I finally decided to get inside the arena. I took out my ticket which was front row tickets, by the way. I have been saving up for this concert like hell. I showed the ticket to one of the staff and he pointed the direction to my seat.

An hour has passed since I have been sitting here waiting, chanting with fellow Aces the names of the members, then their songs or just randomly screaming. There was thirty minutes left to wait. I decided to go for a quick bathroom break, I might get overexcited and pee in my pants, I don’t want to be embarrassed around these crowd. I laughed out loud and the other girl on my right gave me this what-a-weird-girl look. I stood up from my seat and tried to look for any staff around to help me find the bathroom. 

I have been meandering through these walls for the past fifteen minutes looking for the freaking bathroom yet I am as helplessly lost as a child who has lost her mother in a huge crowd of strangers. The staff said it was around here somewhere so where the hell is it. I sighed in frustration and whirled around to backtrack only to get hit by someone who was obviously in a hurry and obviously not looking at where he was going. We both landed on the ground. “Ow!” I tried to push myself up, supporting myself with my right arm but before I could manage that, a hand was offered to me. I raised my eyes upward and what I saw was someone I never expected I would ever see again, not this close anyway. Lee Seung Hoon, tall, lean and ever as gorgeous Lee Seung Hoon, held out his hand to me. I was frozen. I was only able to stare at those cute expressive eyes of his. I noticed that concern was swimming in them. By some miracle, I was able to snap back to reality and I timidly took his hand. He pulled me up and supported me when I went outbalanced and almost fell again.

Lee Seung Hoon was holding me! THE Lee freaking Seung Hoon!

The fangirl within me is throwing a party. I struggled to maintain a calm façade and it wasn’t easy. “Th-thank you,” I tried to say, raising my eyes to his. He smiled a beautiful reassuring smile that knocked the breath out of me.

Goddammit you perfect little you didn’t have to smile like that I was already struggling to keep freaking calm while you’re standing so dangerously close to me why must you smile and make things more difficult? Stop stop stop. Don’t smile. My heart is not strong enough to endure this. I think I might faint. That would be embarrassing. Oh God I need help!  

Oh what a struggle it was to pretend that I was calm when my thoughts were going erratic. His smile slowly faded, his eyebrows furrowed as if he was straining to remember something from the past. I looked down, trying to regain my composure while he’s momentarily distracted. I shouldn’t be staring or else I might actually drool and truly embarrass myself.

“Eli?” his question took me by surprise.

WHAT?! FREAKING LEE SEUNG HOON REMEMBERS WHO I AM!

It took all the strength I possessed not to do a back flip right then and there. I nodded.

“I knew you were familiar!” he said, beaming. “So you’ve come to watch us perform?”

Yes, but I mostly wanted to see you, I thought. “Yeah, I’m a WINNER fan,” I said instead. He nodded.

“So why are you here?” He looked around. “You look lost.”

“I am lost,” I admitted shyly. He chuckled and slowly released his grip on my hand. No don’t let go! My brain shouted. I tried to hush it.

“Well what were you looking for?”

“The bathroom.” He laughed.

“You are so out of the way. Come, I’ll go with you.”

He led me to the bathroom and when we were at the door, I bowed and thanked him for helping me and went inside. Once inside the confines of the ladies’ room, I instantly let myself savor the fact that Lee Seung Hoon bumped into me, held my hand, supported me so I won’t fall back again, led me to the bathroom and best of all, he remembers me! After three long years! I exhaled loudly. I couldn’t scream but I can jump, and jump, I did. If anyone would see me right now, they would probably think I’ve lost it. After about two minutes of jumping and hyperventilating and smiling like the lovestruck fangirl idiot that I was, I finally remembered what I came here for. When I was done, I got out of the bathroom and was about to turn right when someone grabbed my arm and gently pulled, I turn to that direction and I saw him…. Lee Seung Hoon. The oppa of my dreams. I looked at my wrist that was now encircled by his big hands and then at his face. He smiled. Dammit! Stop smiling you beautiful boy.

“Do you have plans for dinner?” He sounded tense, like he wasn’t sure if asking me that was a good idea.

“What?” Did I hear him right?

“Do you have plans-“

“No, I heard it the first time,” I said and he reluctantly smiled.

“Well, do you?”

Yes, you have dinner with your sister who you haven’t seen in a month, the good girl inside me pointed out. “I don’t,” was what came out of my mouth. Sorry unnie.

“Why don’t you come with us after the concert, we’re celebrating at this restaurant and it would really be awesome if you come with… If that’s okay with you, of course,” he added the last part almost as an afterthought.

Are you freaking kidding me? Dinner with WINNER? With Lee Seung Hoon aka the one and only love of my life? HELL YES I WILL! Is this a dream? Am I dead?

“Will you go?” he asked. I only nodded once. I did not trust my voice at the moment.

He smiled again. Ugh. “Good, I’ll look for you after the concert,” and then as if on cue, Nam Taehyun popped out from behind him and called out.

“Hyung, we’re going on stage in 10!”

“Yes, be right there!” Seung Hoon answered.

“See you soon,” he said and then whirled around and started jogging towards taehyun. 

I stood there, frozen in place. Did he just invite me to dinner? I pinched my cheeks to make sure I was dreaming. “Ow!” It hurt so this was obviously very real and happening to me. I leaned against the wall for support and started laughing hysterically. I only wish that no one would see me in this state. 

***

The concert just ended and I bit my bottom lip as I follow Lee Seung Hoon with my eyes leaving the stage and going back stage.

Maybe he forgot, I thought sadly.

But just then, a staff called my attention to him who was two feet away. I went to him and asked what was wrong and he told me, “Lee Seung Hoon says he wants to see you.”

Holy mother of god I really wasn’t dreaming. . Someone hand me a breather! I might cry. I cannot cry and embarrass myself! Not now. Jesuschrist how will I keep calm?!

I nod at the staff and followed him as he led me backstage towards WINNER’s dressing room. I can barely breathe now. My lungs seem to be having problems. How the hell am I supposed to talk to anyone if I can’t breathe properly? This is bad. This is very bad.

We were now at the door of the dressing room and the staff knocked and pushed it open, motioning for me to enter before he did. What greeted me inside were four beautiful boys who were lounged at one side of the room, laughing at a joke one of them has just said. Lee Seung Hoon wasn’t here. I panicked. I looked around for him but still, he was nowhere to be found.

“Who do we have here?” I heard someone say. I recognize that deep voice. That y male voice that could cause a girl to lose her wits could only belong to Song Minho.

Slowly, ever so slowly, I turned my head to the direction the sound was coming from and they were now all looking at me. A blush found its way to my cheeks and I hear someone chuckle, I think it might have been Taehyun. Ugh.

“Eli?” That was Seung Hoon! He was beside me in an instant and then he surprised me by pulling me closer to him and whispering, “Sorry, I needed to go the bathroom.” I swallowed and gave no response at all. I just stood there, frigid and wide-eyed. I must look funny to the other members.

Pull yourself together, woman! Please! My mind screamed at me.

Minho knowingly smiled at Seung Hoon. Huh. “So, are you gonna answer the question?” he asked, looking at seung hoon.

“Didn’t hear it. What was the question again?”

“Who is this pretty girl and why has she come to our dressing room? I hope she’s come for me. I’ll be very willing to give her a tour of the arena.” Seung Hoon scoffed. Nam Taehyun laughed aloud.

“Look at her face hyung! You’re scaring her!” Taehyun said and laughed again.

“She’s come for me. I invited her,” Seung Hoon said simply. Minho raised an eyebrow as if he didn’t believe him for a second but then he just nodded and smirked at us.

“You invited her,” Seung Yoon mumbled loud enough for everyone to hear.

“Hmmmmm...” Said Jinwoo.

“Hmmmmm…” mimicked Taehyun.

And I just stood there with Seung Hoon, not knowing what to do or say to these odd boys.

***

“What do you want to eat?” Seung Hoon asked not looking up from the menu.

“Uuhhh. You can just order whatever for me.” I said because I was in no condition to think of anything else except having Lee Seung Hoon and all the other members sitting this close to me.

Can I cry?! How did I ever get so lucky? Did I save a country in my past life? THANK YOU GOD!

“Hey, are you sure you want me to order for you?” Seung Hoon asked again. I nodded.

The waiter was now at our table and Minho was eager to tell him the orders. He mentioned about seven dishes and so I thought it was already for everyone, I think the waiter thought so too because he was already closing his tiny notebook where he wrote the orders before jinwoo stopped him.

“Wait! We haven’t ordered yet, sir!”

“Eh? Wasn’t that already for everyone?” he inquired and Seung Hoon just chuckled beside me.

“Those are all just for himself,” Taehyun answered, shaking his head.

“Hyung, didn’t I tell you to stop eating so much? You might gain back all the weight you lost. I’m reminding you.” Seung Yoon asked Minho, half serious and half kidding. I know this must be a usual joke between them already because although minho rolled his eyes, he was still smiling.

“It doesn’t really matter if he gains it back, the fans love him not for his weight or any other physical aspect but for his talent and personality,” I said before I could stop myself.

Ten curious eyes turned their full attention to me.

Oh hell.

“I knew I liked you from the very beginning!” Minho said, clapping his hands in glee. I blushed.

“This one’s a keeper, Seung Hoon ah.” Jinwoo commented. I didn’t even dare look at either of them because I was too busy hiding the blush on my cheeks.

“I know right,” Seung Hoon said. Wait. He what?

Dinner with WINNER was something else. I was laughing the whole time and I swear that there was one time when I thought the food was going to spill out of my mouth because Minho keeps on telling jokes that are too hilarious. Seung Hoon, surprisingly was the most timid of them all tonight. I kept stealing glances at him and he looked nervous. From all the interviews I’ve watched of him, he was the mood maker, the life of the party, I knew he was hilarious so why was he being so silent all of a sudden?

The dinner ended way too soon. I didn’t want to leave WINNER. Maybe I could sneak at the back of their van and live there forever? I mentally slapped myself. Get a grip!

The other members were nowhere to be seen now after we said our goodbyes. It was only me and Seung Hoon now near the front entrance of the restaurant and he was in front of me and wasn’t saying anything which led me to have a conversation with myself inside my head.

Me: Should I say something?

Me: But I’m the girl!

Me: It’s Lee Seung Hoon!

Me: I still have my pride.

Me: Man up, you silly girl!

Me: Okay.

Just when I was about to say something, Mino unexpectedly pops out from behind him and grins at me and said, “Oh Eli! Hi! I forgot to ask. Can I have your phone num – ” Seung Hoon covered his mouth and dragged him away.

“I think I heard Jjangmae calling. Let’s go,” he said to Mino.

He looked back and to me he said, “I really had fun tonight! Thank you!” He smiled and they were both gone before I could even stop them.

So this is the end of my dream? I sighed. I should’ve asked for his phone number. Ugh. Of course, I shouldn’t. I’m the girl! Ugh. I contradict myself. I sighed again. I didn’t want to move because there’s this part of me that was still hoping that he would come back and look for me here. I stood there for five full minutes before the cold realization hit me.

He wasn’t coming back.

I went home with all these mixed emotions harassing my insides. I don’t know what to make out of tonight. Did it even really happen? I don’t even have evidence that it happened. It was sad to just let them go like that when they were already so close.

What am I saying?! Shouldn’t I just be thankful that for one night, I met WINNER, had dinner with WINNER and talked and laughed with WINNER like they were normal people instead of world-renowned superstars? Yes, yes, I should just be thankful. I forced a smile.

It was bittersweet but it was undoubtedly the best night of my life. I will never be able to forget it. Ever.

***

 A/N: She met WINNER. I am jealous. *cries* kkkk. How did you like the chapter?? Tell me! xD