Seungri started to shake thoughts ran through his mind too fast for him to grab a hold of. He was gripping his phone dialing the familiar number before he could properly register what he was doing. Why? Why was all he could ask himself. Why when they were at their best, at the top, finally growing into their own did this happen? More important why did it have to happen to the one person who deserved it least? His hands trembled as he heard the distinctive ringing sound.

Ring

Ring

Ring…

Seungri let out an angry sigh. Why wasn’t he answering?! Didn’t he know everyone was worried about him? Then he heard the familiar voice of his hyung. 

“Ah… Seungri-ah.” Before Seungri could answer the hoarse voice that reached his ears; he began sobbing. Tears soon covered his face and he tried desperately to hold them in to show a comforting front. “Seungri… your fine…your fine.” A small smile played across his lips. Leave it to him to be the one being comforted when he should really be comforting Daesung. After all Daesung was the one suffering. That thought made the tears flow harder down his face.

“Daesung-ah!” His voice cracked. Out of all the things he could do, out of all the talents he possessed, he could not help Daesung. Daesung who was his band mate, his friend, his brother, he who should be able to at least comfort Daesung in his time of need couldn’t. He let out a sob. He tried to stifle it with his fist but he knew Daesung was hearing him break a part.
“Shh, shh. Don’t cry Seungri.” Daesung’s voice was soft and soothing, the voice a mother used to calm a child. Daesung always the strong one.

“Daesung. Everything’s things going to be alright, right?” He heard the plea in his voice. They’d get through this…right? Daesung would be okay…right? The line was silent. “Right? Everything’s going to be fine…right Daesung-ah?” Seungri heard the sudden panic in his voice. Daesung was strong. He’d be okay… he’d have to be okay. 

“Seunghyun… your fine. Your okay so stop crying please.” Seungri felt his heart stop momentarily. Daesung wasn’t answering his questions. He wasn’t telling him everything was going to be fine. Seungri felt a chill run through him. What if everything wasn’t going to be fine? What was he supposed to do then?

Seungri finally controlled his tears and began comforting Daesung, “Daesung. Just know we love you. We all love you everything will be okay. Everything will be alright.” There was another long pause on the other end. There were so many words Seungri wanted to say, words of comfort, words that would make him to stop torturing himself with guilt, but those words escaped him. 

“Seunghyun…” Daesung used his real name again for once he wished to hear anything but his real name from Daesung’s lips. “I don’t think it will be…” Then Seungri heard a quiet sob escape his hyung’s lips. Daesung was never one to cry in front of others. It broke his heart. “I killed someone Seunghyun… someone died… because of me… I don’t know what to do.” Daesung’s voice cracked and he heard loud heart wrenching sobs. “What do I do?” The desperation in his voice was hard to handle. What did he do? What did they all do? They would never be the same not after tonight. Daesung especially. Seungri wondered if he’d ever be able to be that Smiling Angel that everyone knew and loved, had he forever lost his smile? Had he forever lost a part of himself? 

A/N: I really do not like this. I don't like any part of what I've written. I didn't capture any of  the emotions that I wanted to. And its short and just blah. I might rewrite it later, it's 5 am here and I really need sleep so this is it for now.