When you carry on living a life…that seems to be the opposite of what you really want, any chance, thrown at you, regardless of its nature, is very much welcome.

We both know that what happened between us is something that we can’t be proud of…but as I lay here in the tub with Naeun…with her back now turned…with me lathering soap bubbles on her and shoulders… the uncalled-for passion…of desire…of requited love seems fitting at the moment.

“Naeun-ah…”

“Hmmm…”

“Does he know about me?”

“Yes…and…no…”

“What do you mean?”

I pulled her close and now her back is resting on my chest…and as she drew near…my eyes shifted from her shoulders to her bare chest…I then slid my hands…feeling her waist. She somehow noticed it and,

“Do you want me to tell you everything or you will remove your eyes at what you’re staring at right now?”

I then kissed her temple instead, “Sorry, it’s just that you’re so y, haha!”

“Stop bluffing.”

“So, how is he?”

“That boy…he is so much like you, you saw him right?  The resemblance between you and your son is undeniable, haha!”

“But his eyes…he got that from you”

“You also noticed? I know right? That’s why he’s handsome, haha!”

“Of course! He looks like me, haha!” She then looked at me…then afterwards meekly smiled…

“Uhm…the first time that he asked was when he saw his playmate’s dad…he asked me, about you. I said, you’re in some far place…working…so he knows that he has a father…but no, because, you never get to meet him yet.”

“That’s my loss…so why did you name him Jaemin?”

 Naeun looked at me…she seemed like wondering about the question.

“Jaemin?”

“Yeah, it’s his name right…I heard Eunji talking about him once…he was hospitalized …what happened? Is he alright? I mean, are you sure, that he has no illness or anything, is he really alright? If you like, let’s bring him to the hospital for a check-up just to be sure and-“

“Taemin, he’s fine….and he’s not the one who was hospitalized. And Jaemin... Jaemin belongs to Eunji’s cousin…I took the job of taking care of him while his parents were working overseas…he lived with us, we were also just as  close to the child because they grew up together with Tae-Eun.”

I saw his face and I knew that by hearing his son’s name, he’ll be shocked…yes, I named our son Tae-Eun…

“You mean…”

“I named him Tae-Eun….”

As she relates all these, I feel Naeun’s pride and happiness. And even if I’m sad because I was not a part of the child’s growth…at least I have now…to make up for lost time…to finally see my son.

“I don’t like the name.” I smirked. And after saying it, Naeun looked at me again, her eyes questioning…

“I’m sorry, you cannot to change the name of the child.”

“I know.”

“So what you are complaining about then?”

“We should just make another one and then let me be the one to name him/her, haha!”

“Crazy! What are you thinking?!”

And as she tried to stand up, to head to the shower and rinse…I grabbed her by the waist and my lips has found hers…while under the soap suds, my hands began  to  wander…and there goes another  round  of passion…of love making.

******

In my mind, I have to talk to Minah. It’s now or never. I should fix my life and while it will be rough and never easy, I will try…th