CHAP 4 ...’s back

“Why are you avoiding her?”

The girl who I never expected to greet me or more like talked to me , was standing right in front of me now. And she’s waiting for my answer. I furrowed my eyebrows, confused with what her meant. She rolled her eyes before glared at me. “It make sense, she’s too freaking dense,” she mumbled to herself but not to my surprise I still could her said that.

“You are really stupid and dense,” she rolled her eyes. “I dont’ understand why she could atract to this kind of girl,” she mumbled to herself again, but this time it pissed me off. Why she didn’t just say it right to my face. “Excuse me, Nana-san, I don’t know what your problem but if you don’t have any problem anymore with me, it’s better if you just leave,” I tired to say it as polite as I could. But, to my surprise, she grabbed my collar suddenly and brought me, who was sitting a few seconds ago to stand in eye-to-eye level with her. She stared at me, menacing.

“I didn’t even know why I gave her up to you, but I hope I won’t make any mistake and I hope you are not too dense and too late to realize her feeling,” she warned me and let go of my collar, pushed me lightly before walked away to left me

I let out the heavy breath that I didn’t realize I was holding and adjust my messed collar. Her figure slowly disappeared from my view. As I was about to turn my attention back to the phone in front of me, I saw some eyes glared at me and some was staring at me, slightly confused, slightly amused or slightly surprised with what just happened a minute ago. I ignored them and thought back to what Nana just said a while ago. Those words really bothering me. And at the time I realize what it meant, I became scared. I was scared with what just happen and with what will happen.

Carelessly I grabbed my bag, putted it over my shoulder and ran out the cafetaria.

“Ah, it’s so damn confusing,” I kicked the chair

A knocked in my bedroom brought my sense back. I walked to the door to unlock it while panting for all the wasting energy things that I did.

“What happen to you?” I met a pair of my cousin’s worry eyes that poking from the crack in the door

“It’s okay, Mayu. It’s just, I had a bad day,” I replied powerlessly and walked to my bed, sat on it. I felt the space beside me shifted but I didn’t bother to take a look at it and kept my eyes on the hands on my lap.

“Mind to share it?” she offered, concernly

I kept mum for a while. Tried to collect the words.

The warmth beside me started to disappear as the owner walked to the door quietly.

“It’s about Miyuki,” I started. She just stayed still. “And why it became something bad?” I heard her reply. I scoffed, more to myself.

“Because it’s Nana who told me”. She jerked up and stared right into my eyes. I clenched my hands, restrained myself from punch onto something. “She said I’m too dense to realize it,” I mocked on myself. A warmth that felt in my shoulder made me tilted my head. She smiled sadly before caressed my right cheek lovingly. “It’s not I didn’t feel it. It’s not I didn’t realize it. It’s the otherwise. I tried to blind myself. I....I’m scared,” I whispered the last words only to be pulled into a warmth hug. She my back with tenderness while I contained myself not to cry. I didn’t want to feel weak no matter what, especially in front of her. The one who I had to protect.

“Don’t act so tough, you dummy. Just cry. Let it all out. It will makes you feel better,” I chuckled in her hug. It was like she could read my mind. And there, I did what she told me. Slowly I let the treathening tears to trickle down my cheeks. I could feel her smile in the crook of my neck when she buried her face there while kept my back.

I told her everything after I managed to calm down and collect the remains of my dignity. Giggling could be heard when she realized how hard I tried to maintained my remained dignity. She playfully pushed my head before ran away from my room, kept giggling. While chuckling at her childish behavior, I thanked God for giving someone like her to me, someone who at the last girl could make me smile again, for now.

You think I’m done with you?

You are very wrong.

I’m going to get you soon.

Real soon.

Just wait for me hahaha

I threw my phone after I read those words. Cracking voices could be heard. I was banging my head against the wall a few times before I finally calmed myself.

I wasn’t going to lie. Those words kept on haunting for almost a week now. Yes, it’s been a week since I met that bastard who ruined my life and took someone who really important for me from me. And here I am, kept sighing for nth times.

“Seriously cous, what happen to you? You look so gloomy and it not the usual you,” Mayu, asked me as she sat beside me. She just came back from school. She was the only who I only had that’s why she was the priority in my life but now, I’m not sure if she was the only my priority. Because lately, my mind always filled with a certain annoyingly gorgeous woman who I just save few months ago. She was the definition of stubborn. She was also the same person who I’ve been avoiding these few months. Not because I hate her. It’s just I so confused with my feeling and if I kept being around her, it got worse.

Me, myself even didn’t understand why I lied to her. Why didn’t I tell her when my arm was healed. Is it because her smile. Or because of her kindness or what? To tell you the truth, I already knew the answer but I’m scared to admit it. Also with that bastard who came into my life again, I didn’t want for her to get hurt. But I already did. I saw her cry in these past weeks and it hurted when I knew I was the one who the cause of the pain.

“He came back,” only with those three words, my cousing already knew what it meant. Her body tensed up and I had to hug her to calm her. She was still traumatized. “It’s okay. I won’t let her to touch you,” I was reassuring her. “But what about her? What if he find out about her?” it striked to the point. “That’s why I avoided her,” I mumbled sadly. “And that won’t solve the problem. From my point of view, there’s no use because I believe he already stalked you for a long time and he must knew Miyuki involved in your life. So, what you have to do is protecting her as well. Not to push her away. Listen to your 17 years old cousin,” I giggled at her smart- remark. Although she was being such a smart- brat, but she sure gave me a lot of advice to me. “Trust me, I knew she already had a special place in you heart,”I remined silent. “And I believe you’ll do the right thing,” she said the last words as she pecked my left cheek. She stopped in her track, “You need someone to share your thought with sometime, aside from me because I won’t be 24/7 beside you. You need to open up to her,” and she went to her room. Left me with thousand thought in my mind. “But, I don’t want her to get her hurt,” I replied to no one but I guessed Mayu still could hear it because I heard a reply from her. “But, you are the only one who can protect her,”

I always love the porch in the morning. The warm breeze that my face, soothed me. It’s also been a long time since I had my quality time with Mayu. Ever since she had a girlfriend, she kept busying with her girlfriend. Well, I couldn’t blame. It must be good to have one but for now, I didn’t think I need one even though my heart screamed the otherwise.

“You know, I never saw you smile so genuinely ever since Aina left and I’m really worried because of that. You don’t know how I relieved when finally after all these years it appeared again, that smile. That’s why I immediately know that she is the one. Can’t you see her sincerity? She really sincerely want to help you. Just let her,” I thought of her words, let it sink in my mind. She was right, undoubtedly right, it’s just I was too stubborn to admit anything.

“So, what’s the plan now?” her question broke off my thought. I stared at her for a while before determined a decision. “I’ll fix and provide certainty for our relationship ,” she smiled satisfied with my answer

I twirled the cigerette in my right hand before brought it to my mouth. The smoke from the cigarette covered some of my view when I inhaled and exhaled it. In the corner of my eyes I saw a hand waved the smoke that coming toward her. “You really should stop smoking. It’s not good for your health... and mine,” the smaller girl beside me scolded. I pushed the cigarette against the surface of the ashtray, extinguish the burning stick. “Trust me, I tried. It’s just when I stress, bad habit came again,” I reasoned, but it was true. I couldn’t hold the desire to smoke when I was stressed.

She chuckled and leaned her body against the railing as she twisted her body to face me. “I don’t want to force you to do anything that against yourwill, but I just think that it might be the time for you to look for your own happiness. Or in this case, you have to smartly choose your decision. As you know, regret always comes too late,” she grinned widely, showing her neat teeths

“You are too smart for a high school girl,” I flicked her forehead before ruffled her hair lovingly. “I don’t know what will I be if I didn’t have you,” I continued to her hair, or more like ruffled it even worse

She slapped my hand away and glared at me. “You are ruining my hair, you jerk. Now, take me to my school,” she ordered as she rolled up her sleeve to see the watch in her hand. “! It’s 7.45 already. I’m going to be late...again,” she spoke to herself before dragged me harshly from my state. I only could let myself being dragged by a 17 years old high schooler. Sighed.

TBC

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