Prof, he's the only one can help me now. My favourite prof. He's not teaching me though. He did once and he's awesome! He's cool, he's handsome, he's smart, he's everything that any mortals wanted to be. Since I can't talk about Taemin with my friends, prof is the best candidate! He's sort of my big bro. I don't have one, I'm the only child in my family. It's kinda lonely not to have any sibling. I told him that once and guess what he said? He said he would love to be my bro. Can you believe that? How can he asked me that? Of course I would accept that offer. And so, we became really close. I told him about Taemin. Not Taemin angel, I told him that I was really into Taemin and he supported me. I would never say a thing about me in love with Taemin to Jinki or Kibum. They would laugh at me and tell the whole universe that I'm into my friend's boy. Anyway, I'll be telling him about what happened to me recently, the mysteries, the questions, everything. I hope he can get the hang of my story.

 

"Prof.. Um..."

 

"Nah, it's okay. You can call me Yunho. There's no one here."

 

"Yunho, can I tell you something?"

 

"Of course, what is it? Is it about the assignment?"

 

"No, it's not. It's going to sound a bit weird. Can you bear with my story?"

 

"Sure, no prob. Take a sit."

 

Yunho sat on the floor and I sat next to him. I took a deep breath before starting the next conversation.

 

"Long story short, an angel came to me."

 

Here comes the silence pause where he starts thinking how stupid and delusional I am. ! ! ! I knew it! I knew it, that there would be no one would trust me if I tell them about Taemin angel. A reaction please...

 

"Okay, go on."

 

"Huh? You.. can you trust me? Do you actually believe me?"

 

"What? Are you lying?"

 

"No! No! I'm not!"

 

"Then, continue with your story."

 

See! See! He's so cool right! It's my bro after all~ What? What? I can't hear you? Owh.. you are jealous with me. It's okay, I know that having Yunho as a brother is the coolest thing every mortals can dream of.

 

"Okay, here's the story..."

 

There, I told him all. I told him how depressed I was when Taemin died, I told him that Taemin cooked for me, Taemin showed his wings, Taemin said he likes me, Taemin came just a few minutes ago and of course, I told him about the faintings. Yeah, it right? Right.

 

Anyway, did he really believes what I just told him. Is he just acting just to, you know.. so, I won't be hurt. He's my bro after all. I really appreciate that Yunho wanted to take care of my feelings but at this time, I would apreciate honesty more that anything. Oh, man... I hope he doesn't think I'm crazy and delusional. He probably would offer me to help me regain my sanity. I'm not insane, I'm telling him the truth. It really happened. It's not some fairytale that I made up. IT'S REAL! I just can imagine that Yunho would contact some mental hospital that he knew. Dammit!

 

"Um, Yunho.. It's okay, you don't have to fake it. You don't have to pretend that you actually believe what I said when your heart doesn't."

 

Yunho suddenly reached his hand and patted me on the head. Then he my head, messing with my hair.

 

"Gosh, you kid. Of course I would believe you, but you know, I'm still having this little doubt that you might be pranking me. Can I see him?"

 

"I wish I can let you meet him, but there's no one can see him except for me. There's one time when he tried to reach Kibum but he just couldn't."

 

"Well, what about the others?"

 

"Same. When he came here just before, I had to pretend that I was talking on the phone just to have a conversation with Taemin."

 

"Well, who knows that I have the ability to see him? Wanna give a try?"

 

"Let me think for a sec"

 

Okay, let's see... If I to let Yunho follows me back to my home and see Taemin, he wouldn't think I'm crazy and I can prove to myself that I'm not delusional. Not, that I have any doubt that Taemin is just my illusion. I just need to confirm that I still have my sanity. But! But, if he couldn't see Taemin, he might really think that I'm crazy and needs help. I don't need any help right? Of course I don't! Why would I need any help anyway? Oh yeah! Remember when Taemin tried to reach Kibum? Kibum did gave a little reaction to Taemin. That proves that I'm not illusioning things. Anyway, that gave me enough reason to take Yunho to my house and see Taemin.

 

"Okay. You should come to my house and see Taemin. But, don't do anything stupid when you see him."

 

"Do what? Like faint when I see him?" he giggled

 

"Let's go then... Bully..." I might as well just leave him here. He can be such a bully.

 

"Hey, I'm just joking. Wait up for me!"

 

* * *  * *

 

On our way to my house, I asked Yunho about the assignment that I supposed to asked my real prof. Well, to be honest I'm quite relieved that Yunho was the one who came to meet me at the rooftop. That stupid Jonghyun... Damn I HATE HIM! Well, I must admit that IHATE HIM EVEN MORE NOW! Should I tell Kibum and Jinki about what happened? No.. I shouldn't.. Because if I do so, Kibum will chase me to the end of the Earth if he knows that maybe Taemin died because of me. Well, did Taemin really died because of me? Please... NO GOD! Poor my Taemin... Stupid me... Damnit I hate Jonghyun. I should just kill him! Shoot him on the head! Stab him at the heart! Oh no.. What am I thinking.. The  last thing I want to be in this maru maru chikyuu is being a criminal. I don't want my mom to hate me. My dad? I can't even think about him hating me. I'll die if he does.

 

"What's wrong, kid? You're hungry?" Yunho suddenly asked me.

 

"Yeah.. No, I mean I'm OK. But I do. I do feel hungry. But, there's nothing wrong with me. You know, hungry it is. But it's nothing serious, really."

 

"Whoa.. Relax kid. It's clear you know. I can see it."

 

"See what?"

 

"I can see it clearly on your face. It's written on your forehead, 'I'M IN TROUBLE' or 'SOMETHING IS BOTHERING IN MY MIND', don't lie to me Minho."

 

".. How do you do that?"

 

"Me.. Nothing is imposssible~"

 

"Yeah right.. Did you manage to confess to the pretty florist?"

 

"What are you talking about? Come on, let's hurry to your house!"

 

"Oh~ no no~ We are not going anywhere unless you tell me about the prettwee Jae~"

 

"Oh no no~ Then tell me what's bothering your mind?"

 

"WHAT?"

 

"What what?"

 

"OK.. OK.. Fine. Under one condition. I'll tell mine and you'll tell yours. So?"

 

"Fair enough. You tell me yours first."

 

"Fine. Jonghyun told me something. Something that, um.. you know... unpleasant.."

 

"Um..hm.. Continue."

 

"He said.. Um.. He said, it's my fault.. It's my fault that Taemin died..."

 

Yunho patted me again. Then he my head and messing with my hair again. DAMMIT I'M NOT A KID!

 

"And you seriously believe that?"

 

"Yeah.. No..I don't know. I don't have any reason to not to trust him."

 

"Then you should have plenty of reasons to not trust him"

 

Huh! Yeah... OH YEAH! HELL YEAH!  Yunho is completely right! He's right! I have plenty of reasons not to trust that Jonghyun. He stole my Taemin and did all kinds of things with Taemin, the one that supposed to be mine.He tainted my angel. S TO THE J. S for stupid and J for Jonghyun. Stupid Jonghyun~! My bro, YUNHO IS AMAZING! 

 

"Oh my god, Yunho. I love you.."

 

"Whoa.. keep it easy. I love you too okay bro. But not that love, you know what I mean."

 

"OKAY! So, tell me about prettwee Jae~"

 

"Stop with the prettwee Jae~"

 

"Fine.  Peautipul Jae~ prettwee Jae~ peautipul Jae~ prettwee Jae~ peautipul Jae~"

 

"Alright! Alright! Um.. No..Not yet. I haven't confess to him yet. I just can't, I don't know.."

 

"WHAT?!! You've been eyeing him for two years already! You would greet him every morning like an eww lover, like 'Good Morning sweetie, looking gorgeous today huh~' like a cowboy then prettwee Jae would answer you 'Yeah, Morning handsome~' it's just EWW! And! And you even had a few dinners with him already! You then would call me in the middle of the night just to tell me things like, 'You know what, there's nothing more delicious than Jae's cooking' and 'we talked about that and this and that',"

 

"You know what kid?"

 

"What?"

 

"You're annoying.."

 

"I know."

 

"I.. I don't know. I just couldn't. I'll get super nervous when I see his prettwe.. I mean pretty face."

 

"Yunho. I understand you. I understand exactly how you would feel when you meet someone that you like. But, you know, you better try before it's too late.. Like me... It's too late.."

 

"Cheer up kid. At least he comes back as an angel. Thanks anyway. I'll do my best."

 

"No prob!"

 

We've been talking and pushing each other for quite sometime. Whithout realizing, we're already there. Arrived at my casa dolce casa. I told him not to be nervous but deep down I knew he wasn't. It's me actually the one that's nervous. I searched for my key and I just couldn't find it in my bag. I kept on looking for it, it's just not there. Yunho then suddenly patted my shoulder and smile while asking me to relax. It did relaxed me, you know the patting stuff. I took a deep breath and look carefully inside of my bag and you know what? Ta-da! I found it. I slowly open the locked door using the key in my hand. 

 

I pulled the knob slowly and pushed the door. My heart.. it's beating ing fast.What if Taemin is not there? What if this is all my illusions? What if Yunho think I'm crazy? I don't know I'm scared! I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared. Huh? What's that sound? Something fell?

 

I turned around and saw Yunho looking shocked. His bag fell on the wood floor. His jaw dropped. Yunho then suddenly pointed his finger towards my bedroom door. He shivered a little. I turned and looked at the direction that Yunho was pointing and I saw Taemin. Taemin looked at me confusely and then started to point his finger towards Yunho.

 

"Minho? Why is the prof here?"

 

Before I could say anything, I heard Yunho's voice.

 

"What the hell...."

 

Taemin looked at me confusely again. His cute face.. Gosh HIS CUTE FACE! HE'S SO CUTE!

 

I turned and looked at Yunho for a while just in case he if he runs away after seeing Taemin OR FAINTS. After all, Taemin is.. as everybody knew, dead. Then I turned and faced the cutely confused Taemin.

 

I should explain to him.

 

"Um.. Taemin... Long story short, prof is here to see you."

 

"Huh?"

 

And so, we talk.

 

* * * * *

 

Look at Taemin. Beautiful, angel Taemin. The way he holds the cup and slowly sipping the tea into his red cherry lips. One word, gorgeous. No, two words, crazy gorgeous! No three...

 

"Minho. what's wrong? Why are your eyes bulging out? Funny, you look like a frog." Taemin laughs.

 

Do you hear that? Do you? Sweet voice of an angel. My Taemin... Ouch!

 

"Bro.. stop it. It's disgusting, you're drooling." Bully.. bully Yunho.

 

"Owh.. Sorry.." I wiped my mouth.

 

"I see. That's exactly how Minho told me. Anyway, Taemin, there's something that I must tell you." Yunho said to Taemin.

 

"What?! What?! I wanna know too!"

 

"Shh.. Minho! Noisy kid."

 

"What is it, prof?"

 

"This kid can be stupid, silly, weird and useless sometimes. So, go easy on him. He's a good kid."

 

"Meanie..."

 

"I got it prof. He can be stupid, silly, weird and useless sometimes. He is. But he's cute." See... Taemin is not only beautiful on the outside but also from the inside.

 

"Alright then, kids. I gotta go. It's late already. See you tomorrow Minho. And remember, stop being so ert. Take care Taemin."

 

"NO I'M NOT A ERT!"

 

"Bye, prof."

 

Yunho took his bag and went to the main door. 

 

"Oh yeah, Minho. One more thing."

 

"What?"

 

"Change your sofa. It's ugly." He laughed and left us.

 

* * * * *

 

So, now the two of us are sitting on the sofa again. Taemin starts to pick up the cups and puts it on the tray.

 

I decided to just be frank and ask Taemin about what Jonghyun said to me at the rooftop. I still can't get the ing words out from my head.

 

"Um.. Taemin. Can I ask you something?"

 

"Yes you can Minho." Still picking up the cups.

 

"Jonghyun."

 

"Huh? Jonghyun? Wha.. What is it?" Taemin looked nervous.

 

"Jonghyun said, it's my fault. It's my fault that you got into an accident. It's my fault that you died. Is it true?"

 

Taemin's expression changed. The cup that Taemin was holding fell hard on the wood floor, broke into pieces. 

 

"Taemin!"

 

"It's okay! I can handle this."

 

"Taemin, are you okay?! Are you hurt?"

 

"I'm fine. I'm sorry. I gotta go."

 

Taemin placed the broken glasses on the tray and headed towards the kitchen, leaving me alone wondering. 

 

 

Taemin... He's hiding something from me. I think I get it now.

 

It's my fault.