I hate going to lecture. It's not that I'm lazy or what, it's just, you know boring. No wait, it's not boring anymore, it's hell. In the past, I could meet up with Taemin whenever I went to lecture. Now, no Taemin here. But at least I can see Taemin whenever I return home. I think it's better anyway. It's always pain in the to see Jonghyun and Taemin being lovey dovey with each other in the past. 

 

"Hey, sup?" A voice greeted me. 

 

"Oh, Jonghyun. I'm doing fine."

 

"I see. Can I sit here?"

 

"Sure, why not."

 

Oh.. Why does he has to sit beside me?  Where's Jinki? Man, thats Jinki's sit. I don't want to sit beside you, Jonghyun. I hate you! You're Taemin's boyfriend. Where the hell is that guy? Huh? Oh I see. That's where you are Jinki..  There you are, standing in front of the lecture hall, making out with your boyfriend, the great almighty Kibum. No wonder, they've been missing since we arrived here earlier. 

 

"Hey, do you know where's Jinki?" Jonghyun suddenly asked me.

 

"Over there, happily making out with his beloved Kibum."

 

"Oh. Great, I wanted to borrow his notes for the upcoming exam."

 

"Don't you have any?"

 

"I do but it's not complete. I might ask him to teach me a few parts too."

 

"I see"

 

Sheesh, I got it. I always knew that every exams that we took Jonghyun would passed them with flying colours. The fact that Jonghyun is always smarter than me pisses me off. No matter how hard I try to beat him I always fail to do so. Did Taemin attracted to him rather than me because he's smarter than me? I'm hating him more and more now.

 

Oh here comes Jinki. Look how happy he is, smiling like a goofy. 

 

"Hi guys, sorry I'm late I had a matter to solve."

 

"Yeah right I saw you and Kibum making out there." I should just be ingenuous with him, he's bluffing. 

 

"It's okay, Jinki. I don't really care. You should appreciate people that you love while they're still around." Jonghyun added.

 

"Yeah, thanks for the advice Jonghyun and Minho, you're just jealous. You're okay man?" Jinki replied.

 

"I'm okay."Jonghyun replied Jinki while smilling.

 

"Oh, here he is. The prof is here." Jinki said.

 

THIS IS SO BORING. I HATE THIS LECTURE. How come these two can listen to the prof diligently. Don't they feel bored? Kibum and Taemin must be lucky. They took other major, I'm kinda feel a lil bit regret taking this major. I should think more before making any decisions after this. It's kinda too late to change my major now.

 

*****

 

THANK GOD IT'S OVER! I'm hungry, it's lunch time already? Time wait for no man, huh. I should go to the cafeteria.

 

As I was walking at the corridor, thinking what I should eat, I saw a figure. A figure that's very familiar. I couldn't see the person well from afar, I should had brought my glasses along. I had a hard time in the lecture hall back then, can't really see well due to my short-sighteness. I went closer to that person and I figured out it was him.

 

HUH! WHAT? WHAT IS HE DOING HERE?

 

"Psst! Minho! It's me Taemin! Come over here." MY ANGEL!

 

"Taemin! What are you doing here? You supposed to be at home! They're going to see you!"

 

"No they won't, they can't see me remember?"

 

Oh yeah, I forgot bout that.

 

"Anyway, Taemin what brings you here?"

 

"Nothing. Minho, I think you should pretend that you're talking on your phone. People are looking at you."

 

Oh, I didn't realize that. I should do as Taemin told me to. I should do it slowly and professionally so that it wouldn't look too weird, right? Right.

 

"Anyway, what do you mean 'nothing'?"

 

"Minho don't get mad at me. I can do whatever I want to." He got a point, I'm not even his boyfriend. What the hell am I thinking. How stupid..

 

"Oh, sorry.."

 

"No, Minho. It's okay. I just wanted to see this place. I just wanted to see omma, Jinki and you know, Jonghyun."

 

So, he wants to see this place, his omma, Jinki and most importantly Jonghyun. No me huh? No Minho. I got it, I'm no one to him.. I'm not someone special. Not to anybody anyway except for my mom, I think. It's okay, I'm not someone to be remembered. I'm a no-good-person after all. I always forget people's birthdays whereas they would never forget mine. I shouldn't be born into this world, it's a mistake. 

 

Huh? What? Why is he looking at me like that? Is there something on my face? He's looking at me attentively.

 

"Wha... What?"

 

"Minho.. You're making that face again."

 

"What face?"

 

"That face! The face that looks like you don't belong in this world." HE CAN READ ME!!

 

"No I'm not! What are you talking about? And what do you mean 'again'?"

 

"What do I mean 'again'? You always made that face whenever I were with Jonghyun. You hate him that much?" HE CAN READ ME!!

 

"I... I don't hate him! It's because... because..." 

 

"Because what Minho?"

 

"Because... you wanted to see everybody except for me. You came all the way here from my house just to see this place and those people that you mentioned. Not for me.."

 

There I said it. I sounded like a lil girl.. No I mean lil boy. Sheesh... Why do I have to be so sensitive. I should stop being like this or people are going to bully me. 

 

Why is he smiling? Why? What's so funny about me being lonely?

 

"Oh, Minho. You're being such a lil boy." HE CAN READ ME!!

 

"No! I'm not!!"

 

"Come on, Minho. You're so cute. Anyway, what makes you think like that? How come you think that I don't want to see you? I came all the way from heaven just to meet you. Aren't you happy enough? And Minho, can I ask you a question?"

 

"Um. Yeah."

 

"Okay, who's the first person I see when I arrived here earlier?"

 

"Um.. me?"

 

"Yup, that's right!"

 

So, Taemin came all the way from heaven to meet me. He also came all the way from my house to this hellish place so he can see me. Basically, it's for me. OMG!! I'M HAPPY! I'M HAPPY TO DEATH! TAEMIN CAME TO SEE YOU MINHO. SILLY MINHO! SILLY ME! What am I being so miserable about? This is real! He likes me! He... he likes me?! OHH.. WAIT! Don't be stupid Minho. I can't just jump into conclusion like that. Should I ask him? Should I ask him if he likes me? Or I should just wait? If I do ask him, will he hates me? Do I sound like a weirdo? Should I? Should I not?

 

"Minho? What's wrong?"

 

"Um.. Nothing!"

 

"Look, if you have any doubts, you should ask okay. You can ask me anything. I'm not going to eat you. I'm an angel!" HE CAN READ ME!!

 

Oh... Should I? Maybe I should. It's just a question, right? I just need to know whether he likes me or not. I hope this goes well. Oh wait! Can he hears people's thoughts? Taemin is an angel after all. Is he just pretending that he can't read people's mind? I hope he can't. Anyway, I should be frank with him. I should ask him whether he likes me or not for once and for all.

 

"Um.. Taemin.. Do you... um.. Do you lik.. like me?"

 

Taemin laughs. Is it funny? Does he thinks that it's a joke? Don't I look serious enough? Man.. I'm a clown. Whatever I do, I will look lame ain't I? Now I'm pissed! 

 

"You're such a loser aren't you?"

 

"What?! That... That hurts! You called me a loser! Even my mom never calls me loser and I'm pretty sure those three won't call me loser too." 

 

"Yeah, You're a complete loser!"

 

"Taemin.. I think I'm going to cry.. You better stop."

 

"Cry then loser. Run to your mom if you want too."

 

"How could you..."

 

"Oh, Minho darling. You are a loser. Of course I like you! You didn't realize that yet? How come I descended from the Heaven just to see you? How come I kissed you this morning if I didn't like you?"

 

"Yeah..I'm a loser.. You descended from the heaven and you kissed me this morning because you like me.. HUH?!"

 

Huh? Huh?! WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! I GOT IT! I GOT IT ALL NOW! THANK YOU GOD. TAEMIN LIKES ME. HE LIKES ME! I'M SUCH A LOSER! I DIDN'T REALIZE THIS? HOW STUPID! I AM STUPID! 

 

Taemin laughs again. He's so pretty. After all, he's an angel. He's graceful eventhough he's laughing hard. Beautiful angel Taemin. Why can't I stop smiling now. I can't control my face muscles. I can't control my mouth. I just can't stop smiling. This really making me happy. I am touched that I think I'm going to cry now. I really have nothing to ask anymore. This is all enough for me to live until I'm 236-year-old.

 

"Minho, you're smilling lika a goofy now. It's so funny."

 

"I am a goofy, like Jinki, your future appa." I completely understand how Jinki felt. I won't make fun of him anymore. Promise!

 

"So should I call you a goofy or a loser?"

 

"Taemin! You're not calling me any of that! And, I'm hungry. Let's go to eat. I'm starving."

 

"But I can't eat with you. Besides, I don't have to eat."

 

"What do you mean? Won't you feel hungry?"

 

"You're funny Minho. Of course, I won't. I'm an angel, silly."

 

"Yeah, then you should accompany me to the cafeteria then. You're going to watch me eating the delicious pasta."

 

"Bully!"

 

I can't stop laughing. He's so cute. He thinks I'm a bully whereas he didn't realize that he's a much bigger bully. He bullied me quite a lot, whether I realized it or not. 

 

We walked together to the cafeteria. We had various kinds of conversations that we never had when he was still around. I kept on pretending that I'm talking on the phone. I figured out that Taemin doesn't need to eat but if he wants to he can just eat. It doesn't really matter. I asked him how did he got here and he said that he flew with his wings from the bedroom window. Which I found that I'm secretly wishing I could see him doing that. Who doesn't want to anyway. 

 

"Oh yeah Minho. I have to tell you something."

 

"What? You look serious."

 

"I just asked our leader, boss about how to let omma see me."

 

"Huh? Boss?"

 

"Yup boss."

 

"Wait, wait. This is sort of funny. Is your boss an angel too?"

 

"Yeah, he's an angel too. He's our leader. We call him 'boss'. What's wrong?"

 

I can't stop laughing again. This is interesting. Funny indeed. Very funny. He's so adorable. I mean angels are so adorable aren't they?

 

"Why are you laughing Minho? Stop it! It's not funny!"

 

"Okay.. okay. So, what did your boss told you?"

 

"He told me that if I want my omma to be able to see me, I have to give him something that is truly mine."

 

"Then should I go to Jonghyun's house to pick up something?"

 

"No you can't."

 

"Huh? Why?"

 

"Because everything that is in the house, Jonghyun bought it. Even my things Jonghyun bought for me."

 

"Yeah, right.. He's a rich kid after all. Then, should I go to your parents' house?"

 

"My parents bought me everything."

 

"What? Then what did you use your money for?"

 

"Food..."

 

"Owh.. food. Okay. You're a big eater, huh?"

 

"Minho!"

 

"Alright.. alright. Why don't we discuss this at home. I've been talking on this phone for hours now. Why don't you go home first since I need to see my prof and ask him about an assignment that he told us to do. While I'm doing so, why don't you think what is truly yours? So we can give it to your omma so he can see you"

 

"Alright then. I'll be going then. Bye! See you at home!"

 

There goes Taemin running towards the field. Probably finding a more suitable space for him to unleash his wings and fly away or went searching for his omma. Man, I wish I have wings. It'll be much easier for me to go around the town. I can brag about them too. Wings.. I should be going now. So I can return home as soon as possible and see my Taemin.

 

I should call my prof and ask him where he is.

 

"Hello? Prof it's me Minho. Can I meet up with you for a while. There something that I need to ask you regarding the assignment that you gave us earlier. Rooftop is it? Alright then, meet you up there in 15 minutes. Alright, thanks."

 

I should wait for him at the rooftop now. It'll be easier. I can't let my prof wait for me. I'm the student after all. I should be punctual.

 

It's been a while since the last time I went to the rooftop. I like it there. There's no one there and the sky seems prettier there, much more bluer and more vast. I love laying down there and sleep. I always did that when I was a freshman since I were not that busy unlike now. I could see Taemin from up there too in the past. The opposite buiding is the sewing room. The room is located on the highest floor. Since Taemin and Kibum took fashion designing, they always have to handle fabrics. You know cutting them, sewing them and do whatever the things that they do with them.I could see Taemin from up there through the room windows. He's always been beautiful when he had fun doing his thing with the fabrics.

 

Here I am! My rooftop. As usual, the door is still as heavy as ever.Thank god I'm quite strong.

 

Hm? Who's that. There's a person. Wait, thats.. Thats Jonghyun. What is he doing here all alone? Huh? Wait.. Wait.. Jonghyun... He's crying. There's tears flowing through his red eyes. Is he.. sad? Of course he is. Taemin is his boyfriend after all. Now I feel bad. I feel like I'm the bad person. If he's crying then why did he said that he's okay back then. Is he hiding his feelings?

 

Huh? My phone. Prof? It's a text. 

 

[ MINHO, I'M SO SORRY I CAN'T COME. THERE'S AN URGENT MEETING AND I ALREADY TOLD PROFESSOR YUNHO TO MEET YOU. YOU CAN ASK HIM ANYTHING.]

 

"Owh.." Opps.. Did he heard me? Did I interrupt his private moment?

 

Jonghyun turned around and saw me. His gaze changed. He looked like he's mad at something. Is he angry? Is he angry that I saw him crying?

 

"Choi Minho..."

 

"Jonghyun.. Are you okay?"

 

He walked fast towards me and grabbed me by my collar. He looked at me with angry eyes. His breathing were heavy as his chest moves up and down swiftly.

 

"Jonghyun what's wrong?"

 

"Choi Minho! It's your fault! It's your fault that Taemin died!"

 

"Wha..."

 

He pushed me hard that I fell on the floor. He walked towards the door leaving me all alone on the rooftop, confused. 

 

'Is it.. my fault? Am I guilty?'

 

"Minho? Are you okay?"

 

I turned around and I saw Yunho.

 

"Prof... Help..."