CHAPTER 5: Are You Listening? (그대 듣고 있나요?)  

            “Aish,” Chorong slammed her fist on the lunch table startling Eunji, Bomi, and Key, who were eating their lunch peacefully. “Where are those two? They should know by now that I can’t eat without all of us in this table.”

            “Calm down, Chorong. They’re coming, see,” Key said, pointing to the two best friends walking towards them.

         “Hi guys!” As Na Eun and Taemin greeted them, Taemin pulled a seat for Na Eun like a gentleman would.

            “Wow Taemin, you’re being a gentleman,” teased Eunji.

            “That’s new,” Key added. “I didn’t know you were a natural.”

           “Gentleman my ,” Chorong scoffed with her somewhat natural rough, baby voice, making it sound like she’s not pissed at all. “Come a little early next time, you idiot lovers.”

             “Why, what’s wrong?” Taemin asked the group as he sat between Eunji and Na Eun.

            “Chorong has chicken feet for lunch,” Bomi said. “You should know by now that it’s dangerous to keep her waiting when she has her favorite dish waiting for her.”

            “Oh… sorry Chorong,” Taemin sheepishly smiled at the glaring Chorong.

           “Anyway, so when are you guys gonna be all kissy-kissy all up on each other?” Bomi blurted out, making Chorong and Eunji laugh.

            “What?” Taemin blinked. “We’re not even boyfriend and girlfriend… are we?” Taemin turned to Na Eun.

           “A-Are we?” Na Eun stuttered as she met Taemin’s eyes. At that moment, they both became paralyzed, mesmerized by each others eyes. Eunji slowly pushed Taemin’s head closer to Na Eun to try to make them kiss, making Taemin snap out of his senses.

           “Yah, Eunji! What’s your problem?!” Taemin’s blushing face instantly went a foot away from Na Eun’s. The four bursts out into laughter.

             “Sorry, won’t happen again,” Eunji smirked and continued eating her lunch.

            While the six were happily conversing in their lunch time, Eunji caught an oppa pass by. Eunji excused herself from the group and approached the kind-faced boy, “Baekhyun Oppa!”

            “Oh, Eunji,” Baekhyun cheerfully smiled back. “What is it?”

            “You got jobs with Chanyeol Oppa in Xiah Dragon Noodles right?”

            “Yeah,” he nodded. “With Suho and Kyungsoo, too”

            “Ah really? Are you guys singing there?”

           “Yeah,” Baekhyun nodded again with a bright smile. “We’re actually working tomorrow. Why do you ask?”

            “Is it a nice job?” Eunji asked. “Like, for musicians?”

            “You bet!” He replied cheerfully. “It’s definitely a cool job.”

            “Can you give me the number of the restaurant? I might need to call them later.”

            “Yeah, sure.”

***

            While waiting for Eunji in the studio, TaeYeon took a deep breath and started to write his song once again. He still didn’t know how the song exactly goes, but he wrote the lyrics anyway.

Can’t you see my tears? I long for you all day. My heart beat when we kissed but now it’s all a memory. Every day, I long for you. That’s how my days go by. Where are you? I’m sorry that I can’t forget you. Come back to me. Don’t leave my side, please.

          All day he had been thinking of Tiffany. He didn’t want his brain to be crowded with the thought of her, but his dream last night—the dream where he confessed his feelings for Tiffany for the first time—made him think of her anyway. At one point, he would smile thinking of how adorable Tiffany was in his dreams, but his energy would suddenly turn upside down remembering how their relationship ended.

          With nothing but her flooding his mind, he picked up his old, blue journal and started to read where he last left off.

Wednesday, March 18, 1998

Today is the last day. It’s finally time to leave. I’ve waited for a day like this to come, but now that it’s here, it doesn’t feel right…

Last night I couldn’t sleep again. I’ve already said how so many different things take over my mind every night, but last night, it was all just about Tiffany. Just why was she given a chance to let my family stay? Why did she not let my family stay? I understand that she’s not selfish enough to do so just for her own sake, but this once, I wished she was. Just this once, be selfish for me.

I’m sure, once I fall asleep tonight, I will dream about her. or maybe I might not be able to fall asleep at all.

Because when were about to leave, my parents gave me a chance to meet her again. And there on her doorstep, I saw her for the last time. There wasn’t even a hi or hello. not even a goodbye. We stood in silence, but her swollen face said millions of heartbreaking things.

TaeYeon flipped the next page.

I pleaded with her to let me stay.
She said she couldn’t do that.
I held her hand and said “I love you.”
But in her reply, I lost everything:
“I loved you, too. I loved, but you’re not the same to me anymore.”
She closed the door and closed our story.

I lost my will to live. I lost her.

            “I lost my will to live. I lost her.”

Tears flooded his eyes, deeply grieved by the simple words he has written. He remembered how hard his life was when he woke up from his coma and just how much Tiffany had cared for him. She was his only source of happiness. Losing her felt like life did not matter anymore. Although life eventually got better without her, trying to cope without her after that day was truly a painful and depressing time of his life.

          When heard the door knob twisting, he sniffed up his tears and tried to compose himself as fast as he could. In a panic, he threw his old diary on top of the baby grand without closing it and scattered the Chopin piece’s pages above it to cover it. He opened up the piano and played a simple major chords to mask his minor-tuned emotions.

           “Annyeonghaseyo, Mr. Kim!” Eunji greeted as she entered with a guitar case hanging on her back.

           “Oh, Eunji, you’re here,” TaeYeon casually replied, though it still sounded unusually higher and shaky than his normal pitch.

           “Key couldn’t come but he lent his guitar to you anyway,” Eunji said, laying the guitar on the corner.

            “Oh, that’s good,” TaeYeon said. “Now, teach me.”

            “Are you ready to learn the Chopin song?” Eunji asked, sitting beside him in front of the baby grand piano.

            “You bet I am.”

            After TaeYeon mastered the basics in learning piano notes, Eunji finally started teaching him the first part of the Chopin song. For a beginner pianist, it was supposed to be hard to learn such a song but TaeYeon didn’t have a hard time. Sure he would make mistakes here and there, but after a few tries, he started getting the hang of it.

            During a small break, while TaeYeon unpacked Key’s guitar from its case, Eunji’s eyes caught the open notebook hidden under the piano sheets laid on the mini grand piano. Without knowing what was written in it, she read,

I pleaded with her to let me stay.
She said she couldn’t do that.
I held her hand and said “I love you.”
But in her reply, I lost everything
“I loved you, too. I loved, but you’re not the same to me anymore.”
She closed the door and closed our story.

I lost my will to live. I lost her.

             “What’s this, Mr. Kim?” Eunji asked.

           TaeYeon jolted up and panicked for a little bit. His past was written on that notebook. He didn’t want anyone reading that. “Oh this,” He casually snatched it away as Eunji was about to look at the previous pages. “Just a journal”

             “Wait, shouldn’t have said that,” TaeYeon grimaced.

            “Journal?” Eunji’s eyebrows went up. “Was that a break-up story?”

            “Something like that,” TaeYeon sighed.

            “Something like that? What happened?” Eunji asked.

            “It’s with a girl whom I loved yeeaars ago.” TaeYeon replied.

            “Really?”

            “Yeah,” TaeYeon smiled as if it’s not a big deal to him. “A girl whom I loved in this town when I was young….”

             “Ohhh…” Eunji asked, “Is she the reason why you came back to this place?”

             TaeYeon shrugged, “Maybe.”

             “Are you trying to find her?”

           “There’s no hope for that,” he sneered. “For all I know, she might have moved to another place already. She might even be with someone else and have her own family. We were just teenagers then, anyway, and the last time I saw her was probably before you were even born. It’s really been so long.”

           “But it seems like you still love her, don’t you?” Eunji said. TaeYeon’s eyes jolted to her startled that she was figuring out more than she needed to know. He laughed and turned his head away, but Eunji seemed utterly concerned that he immediately gave in.

            “I guess…,” he nodded somberly and sighed.

            “Life is full of surprises, Mr. Kim. Who knows, maybe she’s still single like you are!” Eunji said, trying to cheer him up.

          “Even if she was, she is still better off with someone else,” he said dejectedly. “She probably doesn’t even love me anymore.”

           “I may not know the full story, and you don’t have to tell me, but Mr. Kim,” Eunji said, “Don’t bring yourself down like that. If you love her, look for her—know what her life is now. If she already has a man and she’s happy, then let her go. If she already has a family and she’s happy, then let her go. But if it’s the opposite, then you can talk to her and tell her how you feel. If she doesn’t share the same feeling, then let her go. If she does, then that’s great. All I’m saying is, it’s important to have a closure. Don’t just give up without doing anything about it.”

             After thinking over her words carefully, he chuckled, “You’re a pretty direct kid, aren’t you?”

             “I try to be,” Eunji shrugged and smiled.

            “Then…,” TaeYeon took a deep breath. “Do you think I can find her?”

             “Of course!” Eunji cheerfully. “For example, you can start with a job.”

             “A job?” TaeYeon looked at her in disbelief. “What does that have to do with me finding a woman?”

             “There’s this restaurant called ‘Xiah Dragon Noodles.’ This is one of the most visited places in town. A lot of people come here for the food but also for the music. They hire musicians who have enough talent to perform for their restaurant. For all you know, you could be heard by that woman.”

             “Oh,” TaeYeon nodded.

             “Shall we call them now? I have their number.”

             “Now? You’re booking me a job now?”

            “Why, don’t you want it?” Eunji said. “I mean you’re not doing anything with your life. Don’t think I didn’t know.”

             “Okay fine… go ahead and call them.”

             Eunji dialed the restaurant’s number on her phone and put it on loud speaker.

             “Annyeonghaseyo, this is Xiah Dragon Noodles Restaurant, how may I help you?”

             “Ah, yes, can I talk with the manager of the place?” TaeYeon said.

             “Why sir?”

             “I’m a musician and I’d like to apply for a job there.”

             “Ah, okay, wait a minute,” the lady said.

             Soon, a man with a somewhat high pitched voice answered. “Hello, this is Junsu, the owner of the restaurant. Are you calling because you want to perform here?”

             “Ah, yes sir.”

             “What’s your name?”

             “Kim TaeYeon.”

             “Oh, nice name. I’m also a Kim,” the man chuckled.

            “That’s cool, I guess…” TaeYeon said. There are thousands of Kims across Korea. That’s not a surprise for him.

           “Okay Mr. Kim TaeYeon, bring yourself here tomorrow at 10 am in the morning with a sad song.”

             “Sad song?”

           “Every hour has a theme for what music we play which I’ll explain to you when you get here. The sad theme determines how well you do so bring a WRITTEN sad song.”

            “Written?” TaeYeon asked.

            “Yes, written.”

            “Is that all I have to do?”

        “Yes, goodbye now, Mr. Kim TaeYeon. I’ll be looking forward to hear and see you here tomorrow.”

             Before TaeYeon could say goodbye back, the call ended.

             “Wow, that was simple,” TaeYeon chuckled.

             “Yeah, I didn’t know it was that simple,” Eunji chuckled.

          “Well, now I gotta write a sad song,” TaeYeon said, picking up the notebook where he was writing his song just a while ago.

             “Have you written a sad song before?” Eunji asked.

           “I usually write happy or sweet songs, and I guess other topics to, but this one’s kind of my first sad song so it’s still a bit rough,” TaeYeon said, showing Eunji what he has written.

Did it pass by, our love
Is it just a heart-breaking memory?
It’s turning around, your heart. Can’t I catch it with my tears?

Can you see my tears. I long for you all day.
My heart beat when we kissed but now it’s all a memory.

Every day I long for you. That’s how my day goes by. Where are you?
I’m sorry that I can’t forget you.
Come back to me. Don’t leave my side, please.

           “Woah, are these lyrics about that girlfriend of yours? It’s pretty good.” Eunji asked as she read the lyrics.

            “Well you’re one to catch on to things,” TaeYeon laughed. “There’s no chorus yet to it though. No tone or sound to it either.”

            “Then how about I help you write it?” Eunji smiled. “I know how to channel my inner angst.”

            “Tch, your inner what?” TaeYeon laughed at her. “If that’s the case then go ahead and help me write this song.”

           And so they wrote the song together. Eunji was in charge of writing the chorus and TaeYeon was in charge of trying to find the perfect tone for the song on Key’s guitar.

         “You need to find out if she’s still out there right?” Eunji asked while pointing the pen to TaeYeon.

            “Yeah,” he simply replied.

            “Then I have the perfect lyrics for this.”

 

 

           It was 10 am; TaeYeon was waking up late again on a Saturday morning. After finishing the song written by him and Eunji, he has been practicing it till midnight until he drowsed off. With his hair messy, his polo half ed, music sheets spread all over his bed, and his hands clasped on the neck of Key’s guitar lying beside him like some kind of one-night-stand, his phone rang.

“’Oetoriya, oetoriya, Dara diri dara du~ Oetoriya, oetoriya, Dara diri dara du-u…”

            “Yeoboseyo?” TaeYeon answered drowsily with his eyes still closed.

            “Mr. Kim?” He barely recognized the fifteen-year old’s voice with half of his body still asleep.

            “Oh?” TaeYeon groaned hoarsely.

            “YAH MR. KIM!” Eunji shouted at the end of the line. “Are you seriously still sleeping right now?” Eunji angrily asked.

            “Oh, shoot!” TaeYeon’s eyes instantly opened. “What time is it?”

            “It’s 10 am, Mr. Kim! Have you seriously forgotten about your job today?”

           “Oh, thanks for waking me up Eunji.” TaeYeon jumped off of his bed and ran to the bathroom to get ready. “I’ll call you later!”

           As fast as he could, he took a shower, dressed himself up, and packed up Key’s guitar and all the paper that he could see lying on his bed. Successfully, he got ready to leave neatly. However, it took him as long as thirty minutes to get ready since half of the time he just scuttled around his house panicking.

***

           Taking a deep breath, TaeYeon combed his hair, fixed the hanging guitar on his shoulders, and took a step inside Xiah Dragon Noodles. He’s late; forty minutes late. That might not be a good thing for first expressions.

          Entering the place, the first thing he noticed: there were no customers. There were only two waitresses cleaning, wiping off tables, and arranging the place. It seemed like the restaurant just opened.

          As his eyes wandered around the red, Chinese-themed furniture, and the small stage on the middle of the restaurant, a hand suddenly fell on his right shoulder.

           “Mr. Kim TaeYeon, is that right?” greeted a man older than him that sounded like he gulped helium.

            “Um,” TaeYeon turned to see who it was. “Yeah.”

          “Annyeonghaseyo! I’m Xiah Junsu, the owner of this exquisite restaurant.” He shook TaeYeon’s hands cheerfully.

            “Oh, Annyeonghaseyo!” TaeYeon greeted back while bowing a few times.

            “I can see you brought your guitar.” He smiled, patting the guitar on TaeYeon’s back.

            “Am I late?” TaeYeon asked.

           “No, no, it’s alright,” Junsu replied. “The one who’s going to to evaluate your talents isn’t here yet so you can come with me in the small room backstage.”

            “Oh…,” TaeYeon scratched his head.

            As Junsu led him back stage, he asked what TaeYeon’s profession was.

            “Oh, I’m actually a composer back in Seoul, but the company ran into some problems. Lots of people lost their jobs, including me. Now I’m here,” he said.

            “Ah, you were a composer?” Junsu’s eyes sparkled. “Then you might not have a hard time getting this job!”

          Junsu then shouted, “Suho!” Soon, the seventeen-year old wearing a camouflage jacket emerged from the small room.

           “Show this man what you and your guys can do, will you?” Junsu said and walked away to do something else.

            “Oh!” Suho’s eye’s widened. “It’s Mr. Kim!”

           TaeYeon turned his head as Suho offered to shake his hands. “I’m one of Eunji’s friends that witnessed your accident last week.”

            “Oh, really?”

            “Yeah, are you okay now?” Suho asked.

            “Yeah,” TaeYeon nodded. “I’m fine. There were no serious injuries so I’m okay.”

            “That’s a relief,” Suho smiled. “Anyway, shall my boys play for you?”

            “Sure.”

            Suho called three boys from the small backstage room. As their leader, the three immediately followed him. The first one to come out of the room was Kyungsoo, a boy with red hair and similar camouflage rolled-up sleeve polo like Suho’s jacket. The second was Baekhyun with his blonde hair, and his cheerful exterior. Following behind them was the tall boy, Chanyeol, who was carrying an acoustic guitar with a big grin on his face. He seemed to be the most excited out of all of them.

            They went up the small stage and positioned themselves. Chanyeol sat on a foldable chair with his guitar, Kyungsoo stood beside him, Suho stood beside Kyungsoo, and Baekhyun sat in front of the upright piano.

             “Baekhyun, start,” Suho commanded and Baekhyun started playing the piano.

(Song: Baby Don’t Cry – EXO-k) {live version)

Baekhyun sang first.

Don’t hesitate anymore please Please take away my heart
Yes, the sharper the better Even the moon shut its eyes tonight  

Kyungsoo started singing and so did Chanyeol while he played his guitar.

  If only it was any other man If only it was a line from a comedy
I will burn all of the scars in exchange for your love  

The four of them harmonized—Chanyeol as a low voice, Kyungsoo and Baekhyun as main vocals, and Suho as the high background. They were harmonizing perfectly and TaeYeon could tell that they were very talented teenagers.

  Baby don’t cry tonight After the darkness passes
Baby don’t cry tonight It’ll pass as if it never happened
You’re not the one to disappear into foam It’s something you never should’ve known
So Baby don’t cry, cry My love will protect you

With Suho’s eyes closed, he sang.

We exchanged are fates that were headed toward each other
As inevitable as it seemed that we’d miss I know we loved just as much Oh when you smile, sun shines The brilliance can’t be expressed with words
The waves crash in my heart And it crumbles down, oh     Baby don’t cry tonight A night plagued by violent storms (Ooh As if the sky will fall)
Baby don’t cry tonight It slightly fits this night
To let you go at that moment That shines more brilliantly than tears like this
So Baby don’t cry, cry My love will be remembered

Chanyeol started rapping.

On top of the dark shadow of pain
On the threshold of farewell
Even if I take a brutal fall Even that will be for you so I will handle it, uh
Instead, I will give myself to you, who doesn’t even know me
Don’t cry – instead of hot tears show me cold laughter baby Say no more (baby) no more (don’t cry)
Please don’t hesitate at the moment you’ll become foam
Say no more (baby) no more (don’t cry)
So you can remain as a shining person Just burn me with that dagger instead  

Kyungsoo started singing, sounding as if he was actually going to cry.

  The moonlight fills your eyes
This night passes silently in pain   Baby don’t cry tonight After the darkness passes
Baby don’t cry tonight It’ll pass as if it never happened
You’re not the one to disappear into foam It’s something you never should’ve known
So Baby don’t cry, cry My love will protect you   The early sunlight melts down
The brightness that resembles you falls down
My eyes that were once lost finally Cry, cry, cry  

          “Kamsahabnida!” “Thank you, thank you!” The four bowed in front of TaeYeon—their only audience. Impressed by what he just saw, TaeYeon stood up and clapped his hands and stared in amazement, making the small dimple on his right chin appear.

            “Yaaah~ that deserves a record!” TaeYeon clapped. “Did you guys write that song?”

           “Yeah,” Suho smiled. “That’s usually how things kind of work around here but there are also some stock songs at the back.”

            “You write and compose your own songs,” Baekhyun added. “Even the stock songs are written by past musicians here.”

             “Yeah, Junsu made that rule himself,” Chanyeol added.

            “That’s cool,” TaeYeon stood there in amazement. “That’s very record deal material, you guys.”

           Just then, Junsu was heard shouting at someone near the entrance of the restaurant. It was somewhat unusual to see the man exploding since he had been a very sweet guy, or at least, he sounded like that.

            “Why are you so late, huh?” Junsu shouted.

            “Well, what do you expect?” a woman replied. “You’re making me work on a Saturday!”

           “Fine,” Junsu’s voice turned back to its natural baby-voice. “I understand. But please, just see if the new guy is good or not and hire him according to the rules.”

Please Subscribe to read the full chapter