Chapter 1

Fill My Heart By Your Love

 

Chapter 1

Holiday morning...
Hwekim dries the clothes at the porch and looks up at the sky. Perfect! The weather is very nice, so today maybe that person will come. When she thinks of meeting that person again, her beautiful face makes a smile.

"Hwekim!"
When she hears her dad's calling and she replies, "Coming" and walks to living room.
"A few days ago, your cousin bought me a bottle of wine from abroad, right? I remember I kept it in the frigde but now it's gone I don't know where. Did you take it?" Sungjae ages 42 years old is wondering, he truly kept his wine in the frigde but now how did it gone? He already asked his son who is sitting and watching Basketball NBA Completition on the sofa but he said he didn't take it and he also doesn't know when did it gone.

Choi Hwe Kim has got height 160cm, she's skinny so that's why she looks small and cute. She talks in a low voice and looks at her father and asks, "Dad, you will go to uncle's house in an hour later. Why do you want to take that bottle of wine?"
Uncle is her father's brother, right now his only son is living in USA after auntie passed away last 3 years. Uncle used to live in USA with his son but he wasn't habitted in living there so he came back to Seoul. Sometimes, he misses his grandchildren, he will visit USA. And her father always visit uncle on holidays.
 
When he hears his daughter said like that then he thinks his daughter is the only one who hides the wine. He can't hide his shy smile with not well figures. His daughter might won't truly give him the wine. Even his daughter has a cute face, really cute but a father like him isn't really proud. The cute face of his daughter doesn't really different from younger age. She looks like his wife who passed away years ago both personality and mind. Something that's not right, can't do is can't do and just don't have to talk about lobbying.
When she sees there's no response of her father, Hwekim rolls her eyes with tricks.
"Dad! I hope you don't think about taking it to drink with uncle, right?"
"It's..." Sungjae gives a fade smile with no negative figures.
"I already know you will do it. I kept that bottle of wine since long ago," Hwekim smiles accepting that she really did take the wine from the fridge to hide from her father's eyes.
"My daughter, where did you keep it?"
"Dad, you go to uncle's house, you can buy some fruits to. And for the wine, you don't have to take it to."
"But..."
"No but, buying fruits is enough."
 
Luhan who is watching Basketball NBA Competition near there, while it is advertising, help his father begging his sister, "Hwekim, give him back the wine. Sometimes, men want to drink a glass of wine too. That feeling, women like you won't understand."
Choi Lu Han ages 27, older than his sister 2 years. He left from being an army last 7 months, right now, he is a worker of marketting of one trading company. On holiday, he loves to date with his girlfriend, Yoona, but today he chooses to stay home, all these are just for watching Basketball NBA Competition of Hav Seavjir that is very popular.
"Yeah, yeah, just like Luhan said. I only want to drink a glass of wine with your uncle." Sungjae smiles to his son as a thanks for helping. Luhan winks back to his father means nothing, men help men is a normal story.
And sure, Hwekim sees all those smile and wink that her father and brother bluetoothed. She will talk with her brother in a little more. She gives a serious face, "Dad, you has blood pressure. The doctor said, from now you mustn't touch any wine. Not a glass even a drop."
So lucky that she hides it on time. If her father really took the wine to uncle's house, he wouldn't drink just a glass of wine, "Please don't drink wine and make me worry."
Sungjae looks at his daughter who worries about his disease. He doesn't say anything anymore, he doesn't want his lovely daughter to worry so he follows her, "I know, I will buy some fruits to your uncle's house."
"Thanks, dad,"

Hwekim smiles happily and turns to her brother, "2 months passed, you owed me 5000, last month you owed 6000 more and you promise that this month you will pay back to me. If you don't pay back, from now this house doesn't have food for you and you have to feed yourself, understand?"
Mom has passed away when she was 12 years old. After that, she had to take over all the housework. Even studying while working was very busy but she never felt tired even a little because her father and brother are the most important people in the family.
But this man eats food that she cooks and wears clothes that she washes, even this so, he is still a dry-wallet person (never left money every month), often borrows her money and she just couldn't think he dared to say 'Women won't understand men', so funny!

Feed yourself? Luhan opens his mouth wide. He just works in the company 5 months ago, the salary isn't really high. If in a month, must spend for foods 3 times everyday, for him, it is like killing so he shows her that he awares his fault.
"Hwekim, wait, I just didn't finish what I would say. You hid the wine because you're worry about dad's disease, you're really awesome, haha!" Luhan laughs loudly to cover what his sister just said.
Hwekim holds her laugh, "Really? And just now, you said 'sometimes men want to drink, that feeling, women won't understand' what is exactly?"
"Those nonsense speech, just forget it."
"Even though you agree with me, but the money that you owed me..."
"Hwekim, it's 9.25AM, if you don't leave now, you will be late for work," Luhan tells his sister with a 'good' purpose, it's time to go.
Hwekim looks at the clock on the wall, she really forgets about it so she walks to take the jacket and her bag in her room. After says bye to her father and brother, she walks out from the house.

Luhan lets out a heavily breathe after he hears the sound of a door's closing. He should keep his not-much money well. His sister is really scary, her cuteness is just a fake one, him and his father just can follow her. He thinks that his sister's future husband must be train like a pet.

Hwekim walks out from apartment and looks up to the house on 6th floor. She didn't truly want her brother's money, she just want her brother to takes care of the father, don't let him drink wine, especially not to help him grants his wish to drink wine. But now, she has nothing to worry for awhile. She smiles sweetly and goes to train station.

+++++++++++++++++

Deep Blue cafeshop is located in the middle part of Seoul, open serving every 10AM.
Jessica Jung is standing, making coffee quickly and professionally at the counter. She's 28 years old. Last 2 years, she bought this shop and became the owner and the manager of the shop. The shop progresses perfectly. Firstly, with 3 workers, now there are 5 workers more plus 2 part-time workers too.

"Grandpa Sun, good morning!"
Hwekim is a part-time worker of the cafeshop. She smiles greeting to grandpa Sun, who comes to the cafe every morning. Grandpa Sun is about 80 years old, he was a teacher. He loves joking, and he likes putting nickname to workers, like her name, he always call her 'Miss Kimchi."
"Miss Kimchi, today looks really good, you can give me a cup of coffee," grandpa Sun smiles softly.
"Granda Sun, I will take you to your seat." Hwekim also likes his funniness too.

After serving a cup of coffee for grandpa Sun, Hwekim stops walking when walks through a seat in front of the counter, talking with costumer, because this costumer is her best friend since she studied in university.
"Anna, today you came so early, your boyfriend might not busy watching Basketball NBA Competition like Luhan oppa, right?" Her brother told her that even the sky is falling, he will watch till it ends first before run and just don't talk about dating.
"Today, he works OT at his company," Anna wears the ordered suit plus the style of her pretty hair and she looks really cool and it's the fact. Her work is also awesome, she worked in the company just about 2 years and became the general manager.
"Again? Tour work is that busy?" Recently, Hwekim is frequently hear about her bestfriend's boyfriend often works more. Not sure, maybe she and Anna have met more than Anna and her boyfriend meets. Seoul's economic is that best now?
"I trust him. However, I also have a date with a client too," Anna trusts her boyfriend from all her heart. They have been with each other for 5 years and last half year, her boyfriend changed his work in a tourist company. He told her that right now, he wants to focus on his work the most, about marrying will be talked to few years more. Anna also supports her boyfriend too.
 
Jessica gives a cup of coffee that Anna ordered, after Anna says thanks, Hwekim asks, "Unnie, can I ask? What I am wondering is right or wrong? Where are couples in this universe that in a month almost never date while live in the same country. Isn't this weird?"
Jessica tells her opinion, "A couple must trust each other is the most important, but what Hwekim is wondering also not wrong. Anna, sometimes you have to focus on your boyfriend."
Anna looks at the 2 people who are in front of her, "If you two are really interest on my love story, just take these times find your own love story, it's better."
"I didn't say I don't wanna find, but the person that I love is too far that I can't reach. I'm crazy, hmm!" Hwekim takes a deep breathe.
"And I don't have boyfriend," says Jessica.
"Look at you all, it has to be me to take a deep breathe."
Anna put the cup of coffee after sipped it, "Hwekim, talk about you first, meanwhile you know you can't reach it, you should give up your desire to get the love flower of an enormous tree since long ago. And unnie, do you know, there are many male costumers come just for a beautiful cafe manager like you. If you just shout, I want a boyfriend, I believe there will be many boys want to."
"I agree to what Anna said. If unnie screams, I need a boyfriend, there will be a long line of boys who will apply to be, hahahaha!" Hwekim laughs while talking.
"Hwekim, are you a 2-heads-bird?" Jessica is both mad and wants to laugh.
Hwekim smiles shyly, "Unnie, I just kidding. However, the people are talking, right? The story is passed and flowed, you should focus on present and stop think about the past. I really hope one day you'll really shout, 'I need a boyfriend.'"

Jessica was an older student in her university, she knew Jessica by Anna's introduction and three of them became close. While Jessica unnie studied in university, she had long black hair and she was really popular because she is beautiful, pretty face, soft and whiten skin, perfect personality and quality.
Before, Jessica unnie was really friendly and smiley and it wasn't like now, her smile was changed suddenly. If the accident last 5 months didn't happen, unnie would became the happiness wife ever.
Jessica unnie and Yeonho oppa were boyfriend and girlfriend, the most cutest couple that everyone was really envy. They really loved each other. But last 3 months, Yeonho oppa had an accident and lost his life. It looked like he also taken Jessica unnie's heart with, even though Jessica unnie wasn't be like a walking dead but she cried so much, wilted, and no bright smile like in the past anymore. Unnie's face was extremely sad and hurtful.
"Alright, I will scream loudly instead of you that 'I need a boyfriend', did you like it?" says Jessica coldly.
"Unnie, I'm serious."
"I'm serious too." Jessica smiles and walks, "Alright, I stop talking, going to make coffee."
Anna looks at Jessica who is walking to counter and feels like nothing to say anymore, "We're lose again, Hwekim. You're talking too much. I guess she can see what we're trying to do."
"Too much? You see that I have a good heart."
Anna and her want unnie to join a party to make some new friends. And Anna wants Jessica unnie to know her manager. But the result is zero.
 
"Anna! What kind of person is your manager?" She never asks officially.
Anna thinks awhile, "I will description the following of female workers at the company to you. He has charming eyes and they're like a soul catcher, like an electricity which is really powerful. All girls can't look at him, if they do, a second after, they will lose their soul. And girls beside him are never bore with him."
"What? Your manager sounds like a girl-hunter that spread his charm everywhere. And why did you still want to introduce unnie to your manager knows?!" Hwekim just can't understand what her best friend is thinking.
"Don't be so stress. This is call get ready to fight while another doesn't know yet. We can say, a broken branch will grow a new."
"What does it mean?"
"These 3 years, unnie is never take her eyes to look at opposite-gender people around her. It isn't only her mind, but she tries to cover herself or in order to say, she is building an enormous ice wall. I think normal men cannot tremble her mind so I changed to a powerful electricity. Everyone says my manager is never flirt a girl plus his loves-to-compete gifted. Sometimes, it won't give a bad result at all, we couldn't see."
After listened to her best friend talking, Hwekim feels like this won't give any result but must give a try. Anna and her also want their unnie to get out from sadness soon too.
 
At first, Hwekim wants to say something, but her eyes are seeing someone who is walking into cafe and it's making her heart beats fast.
"Anna, I'm going to greet a costumer, okay?"
Anna is thinking why does she looks so hurry? But when she looks to the entrance, she sees Hwekim's 'enormous tree' is coming.

"Welcome to the cafe!"
Hwekim shows a sweet bright smile to the male costumer who just enters, "Alone?"
The man is tall, his face is really handsome, his thick eyebrow is lifting a little bit, his face contains confidence and indifference. He looks at the female worker who is in pony hair and nods.
"I will take you to your seat."

Hwekim leads him and in her hand has menu. Her heart trembles more than before. Today her boss is even more handsome than last week.
She still has another daily work at main office of all kind of goods 'Tatong' which is popular. She works there almost 2 years, but she is just a staff and the man who is walking behind her is the boss. He is Kim Jong In or Kai, the boss or manager of Tatong shop. His mother is Kim So Ee who lives in Japan.
It's been 2 months since she saw her boss appeared in the cafe for the first time. She surprised and her heart was almost exploded. But when he saw her, his perfect face is just always indifference, it's like before or even not that so, he just doesn't show any reactions. All these attitudes, he might doesn't know she is one of Tatong's workers. In fact, there are a lot of workers, however, his office is at the top floor of the company and her office is at the groundfloor, the smallest part of the company. It's just a normal story when he doesn't know she is his workers.

After Kai is sitting, Hwekim put down the menu on the table for him to order.
In this area, there are many houses for rent. On holidays, people who lazy to cook will come to the cafe and have both for breakfast and lunch and they can sip the greatest taste of coffee too.

She looks at the fingers of Kai which are opening each page, large hands but fingers are slim. She used to think her boss works in the office everyday, his skin should be whiten but when see clearly, it's light brown, maybe he often goes exercise under the sunshine.
In fact, when she saw her boss for the first time, she didn't feel anything. He used to divorce. Nowadays, he is single like what her friends at work said. His personality that has confidence for himself, quiet, and proper method of mental. He looks like fills with fearfulness and doesn't want to get close. And she heard those gossips who envy him that he born with riches without doing anything and with wealth for his full life.
But no matter what kind of person of her boss, for lowest staff like her doesn't have much problem. She started to interest his stories since Christmas last year.

That time, Hwekim was still a new staff, before went home, there were many documents that required for help appeared. After she could finish them all,  it was about 9PM. When she left the office, the guard asked her:
"You must be very tired."
"I'm sorry to leave so late. I think there's nobody left in the company?" After everyone left the company, the guard checked everywhere in the company for 1 hour. And she thought she was the last one who left because it was a Christmas night.
"You weren't the last one. Boss didn't leave yet."
"Boss is still inside?" She felt really weird.
"Nothing is strange. He works till late night everyday."
She almost couldn't believe that, did the guard just joke? It was Christmas day, how can boss worked so late in a special day?
But the phone on the counter rang, she couldn't think that it was boss called from top floor. He wanted the guard to buy him a dinner because he would stay longer.
The biggest manager was truly work late, and it was 9PM and he still didn't have dinner yet. But for her, even though her friends kept their works for her to do, they still gave her some foods, they didn't let her hungry and right now she was about to take all those foods to celebrate Christmas but would be late for 2 hours at Deep Blue cafeshop.
Maybe it was because after her mom dead, she never let her family to wait and hungry. When she heard her boss was hungry, she was really worry.

These years, in Seoul, there are a lot of shops just opened but Tatong didn't get any problems but the result of work is getting better and bigger every year. If just keep the supporting, it might not getting that good. She thinks the lowest staff are the most tired, no matter what kind of work, they will do. But it seems like not only them, the boss is also has a lot of press, the gurantee is getting large and the works are getting more and more...
Totally, she interests his stories since that time.

After she started to interest his stories, she realizes that what she heard and what she saw are completely different.
Like, there was a time she helped others to prepare document for the meeting, they hadn't make tea, everyone thought the boss would blame. But he just said 'Continue your work' and he read the documents in his hand confidentally. It wasn't like everyone said he is furious.
The area where she often see her boss is at the main hall because it will cross the office on the groundfloor. Even when he is walking, he won't waste the time, if he doens't talk on the phone, he will talk about the business with his secretary. No matter what, every time she meets him, this tall man is always handsome and attractive. It is really hard to not look at him. She examines him even his method how he decorates himself. And when she compares him with fade milk color suit and black suit are fit him really well, show people his conscientiousness that stick with him since his birth and it made her know that men have their ability for people to respect with charms too.
Honestly, her professional examine skill for her boss almost can be write in a small book. Before, she just can look at him ffrom afar but now close in the cafe, it's really strange and really happy.

What she thinks is floating, when she gets back to reality, she sees a black pair of eyes of her boss are looking at her, his figure is showing he wants to order food makes her stupefy.
"Sorry, can you repeat what you order?"
Kai says, "before you were imagining?"
"I'm really sorry, I will be careful next time," when she sees he is getting conscientious, she says sorry again and again because she doesn't want him to hate her even though the one in her heart which made her daydreams is him.
 
Meanwhile, grandpa Sun who is sitting next to there laughs and says, "Miss Kimchi, you like this man because he is handsome."
Hwekim's face is turning red because she is shy.
"Grandpa Sun, what are you talking about? I'm not." She surprises and hurry to ignore and afraid if the boss will feel bad.
"Why? Dry your mouth, my grandchild, you're drooling."
Does she really drooling? When she hears people say like that, she surprises and dries the edge of her lips at once but there's nothing. And she sees grandpa Sun laughs happily, even other costumers giggle too. She's been cheating so that's why everyone says grandpa Sun is like a child.
While Hwekim is shy, Kai says:
"I want to order some food."
"Okay."
While she is writing what Kai ordered, she peeks him and his face is really conscientious and doesn't show that he doesn't like what just happened. She lets out a heavily breathe and smile and hold a paper she just wrote and turns to the kitchen.

After awhile, Hwekim takes the ordered food to Kai and grandpa Sun is about to leave so she walks to him, "Grandpa Sun, walk slowly."
Grandpa Sun walks away but not forget to leave a joke, "Grandchild Miss Kimchi, you're drooling again."
The old man giggles happily and Hwekim forces herself to smile. And she cleans the table, after that, she sees a lady about 35 years old walks into the cafe and ignores staff's greeting. The lady walks and glaces at Kai, and she stops at his seat, it looks like she is very mad.
What? She knows the boss?

"Manager Kim, did you kick me out?"
Maybe it's because of angriness makes her voice is really loud, attracts other people in the cafe to look at what is happening. The hands of Hwekim that are moving stop immediately. This lady called him 'Manager Kim' so she is one of Tatong's workers too.

When facing with the one who comes to make an affair, Kai turns to the lady and look at her with his black eyes and says with a dry voice, "The story that you recieved money from middle tradesman is true, isn't it?"
"I already explained but the factory still wanted to give me. However, it could not count as middle tradesman, it's just a small customer that the factory provided as a gift. Manager Kim, I hope you think about what I worked for the company for over 10 years. Please show some mercy, you can revoke or subtract my position but not kicking out."
 
Hwekim notices, she heard something of administer Park been checked that she used to recieve cash from middle tradesman and maybe been kicked out or maybe she is that administer Park?

"Manager Kim, it's just a little mistake, and it can be forgived. If you still want to expel me, I will report to working ministry that you expel your merchant unfairly," Park Hae Mi claims one's rights for her work. She worked at Tatong shop for almost 15 years, she just got a position as an administer. She doesn't want to have no work in this age, before she always asked to meet manager Kim for so many times but never could. Then she heard people say the boss likes to come here in Deep Blue cafe so she comes to have some mercy but the result is still stingy, maybe she has to report.
 
When facing with blackmailing, Kai doesn't scare even a little, "I should send the particular data of this story to justice to supervise."
Haemi's face becomes pale, even though this time, she just got the gift but a few years ago, she truly used to recieve the cash of real money from middle tradesman. If there was checking of last few years data, her problems would be bigger.

Damn! Haemi angries till her face goes red, but what can she do? She doesn't want a report back. Her angriest rolls and becomes a fire, and she lifts the cup of coffee from the table, after that she flings the coffee to Kai badly.
"No!"
Hwekim covers Kai. Coffee that at the first time should been flinged on Kai's face has now been flinged on Hwekim's neck and chest, the chin too.
All people in cafe plus Anna and Jessica too, surprise and exclaim for flinging coffee event that happened so fast. And Haemi gives an unhappy face and looks at Hwekim who covered Kai to prevent him from flinging and walks away.

Kai surprises, he couldn't think Haemi would do something with no reason and the most extraordinary is he couldn't think this small girl would cover him, he quickly gets some tissue for her.
"Are you okay? Did it burn you?"
"Thank you," Hwekim takes the tissue and clean her chin, "I'm fine, the coffee wasn't hot, how bout you? You didn't get fling by coffee, so good," when she sees he's alright, she lets out a smile.
But Kai cannot smile, his handsome face is a little unhappy, if Haemi threw the cup with, she would injure.
"From now, don't do like this, okay?!"
Hwekim amazes and then she smiles and nods.
"Yes, I understand."

Jessica and Anna walks to her unhappily.
"Hwekim, are you alright?" Jessica worries.
"We should prevent her and let her to sorry Hwekim."
"Unnie, Anna, you don't have to worry. I'm alright, the coffee wasn't hot anymore, just a little frighten."
Hwekim smiles, she was truly frighten but it's good that the boss is okay.
 
Never see! Been flinged by coffee, still can smile brightly. Jessica and Anna admire. After that, Anna gets call from her costumer so she goes out and Hwekim goes to change clothes at workers' restroom.

In the restroom, Hwekim takes a new uniform from Jessica unnie and sees that unnie is looking at her, "Unnie, you want to say something with me?"
"Ran to cover the coffee without thinking of anything, didn't care if the coffee was hot or not, you would get burned or not, Hwekim, how much do you like your boss?" Jessica asks like this with meaning hides behind.
Hwekim shys till her face goes red, and not answer honestly and hold the tissue wipes her face.
"I didn't think much that time, it's like you said, the costumers are the most important because of that so, we can't let the costumers injure or coffee to be flinged at. Do you think I'm right?"
"Right, costumers are the most important," Jessica agrees, "But you prevented Kai like that, I think he will noticed you. Not sure, he would know what's in your mind and your heart. Even though you like your boss, but you don't want him to know what he means to you because you don't want to disturb him, right?"

After what just happened, she knew another fact of Kai, even though he wrinkles his eyebrows, it looks like he's angry but his voice and face show her he was worried, so soft.
What is good to do now? She likes her boss even more.

When see her smiling alone, Jessica doesn't want to see it anymore, "Hwekim! You still smile, covered your boss from coffee is so happy, huh?"
Hwekim is still smiles brightly.
"You can stop smile, right now you should think about yourself, will Kai remember you? From now, if you guys meet at the company and he knows that you have a part time work, will he expel you like that lady?"

Hwekim works here because Yaejoo, university student that works and studies, she works here almost 2 years but this semester, she had to train her work in university every Saturday for 3 months. But she didn't want to lose her work in the cafe. When Hwekim knew, she helped Yaejoo work here every Saturday and it's just left Saturday next week because starting from next month, Yaejoo will can work on Saturday like before.

Hwekim surprises, "Expel me?"
"Even though the company didn't make sure that, no part time working but the boss might won't like it. If you guys meet at the company, what will you do?"
"It sounds impossible, I'm a person that doesn't really have body, I mean nobody easily notice me. Unnie, I work there almost 2 years, he still didn't know I'm his worker and I just work here for another Saturday, I think it's just fine," Hwekim is also not sure for herself, because it doesn't happen yet. She doesn't know if she truly meet him and what will she do.
"I hope so, just change your clothes, I'm out."
"Okay, after change, I will out too."
When Jessica already left, Hwekim starts to change her clothes and thinks about what unnie just said. Will Kai not like his workers work in another shop?
Even though she thinks the percent of Kai would notice her is less but she still doesn't want to be expeled, when she is at company, she should be careful.

But he didn't get fling by coffee, it's really good.

Hwekim changes her clothes happily. After that, she goes outside, Kai's seat is now empty, he already left?
Even though, she just met him but she wants to meet him again next Saturday. When she realizes, next Saturday is the last day she will be close to Kai, she just really frighten.

But she couldn't think, it wasn't the next Saturday yet, she could be close to Kai at the company. More than this, she would been called by him at the groundfloor biggest hall.

 

I'm really sorry for my bad English, but I hope you can understand it :) And my writing style is just simple ^^; Thanks for reading and please share me your opinion and don't forget to Subscribe  ^^

Latest Update: 14.02.09

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jeleexoxo
#1
Chapter 4: Btw... update soon chingu! xD I'm anxious for the next! And I'D LOVE TO READ ALL YOUR STORIES!! XD
jeleexoxo
#2
Chapter 4: It's stunning as per usual! xD Anyway... I suggest 'His life is like this' instead of 'His lives is like this' or maybe you meant 'He lives like this' xD Anywayy it's a fragmented sentence which I suggest revising xD other than that... AWESOME JOB!
jeleexoxo
#3
Chapter 3: Lovely chapter!! xD I am so sorry it took me this long to realize that you've updated :( (side effect of drowning in the countless stories I've subscribed to) Anywayy... awesome as usual!! xD But I suggest changing 'Sure, I order it' into 'Sure, I'll get that' :)
LynSanity
#4
Chapter 4: nope! haha i wrote my previous fics with present simple too :D ehehe but i write my fics in past tense now lol
and anyway, update soon pls! :D
amjtjahm33
#5
Chapter 4: I hope you update soon:) No pressure I know school and life is hectic.
amjtjahm33
#6
Chapter 2: Whaaa please upade soon:) I love the story btw^^
PipTheTerror #7
Chapter 2: I love that you put so much content into this story :)

I think with a bit of editing, the passion you've put into it will really come to the fore.
You put a lot of effort into creating three dimensional characters, which is always a great idea. No one likes reading a story that is totally black and white or too obvious. I think you've done a wonderful job trying to make sure that isn't the case :)

Perhaps, if you're really worried about your English (and I don't really think you should be), you could look into getting some kind of a beta reader. But, I think you're progressing incredibly well. The more you write, the easier tedious things like grammar will become :) and this story is definitely something to be proud of :) If I could make a tiny suggestion, maybe make the line spacing a little bit bigger? That might help thick readers like me follow a little bit smoother :) But that's not really a huge issue, just a tiny suggestion ;)

Just keep writing \o/ and do just as much reading :) One of the best ways to improve as a writer is to read as many words as you write \o/
Great job so far :D

- PiP.
-Moshiexo- #8
OMG ! I just read the foreword and I'm started to loving it . :D
*It's not easy to get this kind of story you know what I mean is like you , kai , luhan and also jessica . I hope Jessica won't be in this story .
jeleexoxo
#9
Chapter 2: AMAZING!!!! AHHH WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO UPDTE AGAIN?!! Just needs a little bit of editing and its good to go xDD I love how you can write something this long! I always get side-tracked when it comest to writing xDD
TamTamlovesChanYeol
#10
it sounds cool! :) hehe hwaiting ^-^ pls check out my stories too :3