“You need to let me go.”

“No, oppa. Don’t leave me.”

“I’m sorry…”

“Oppaaaa!”

Stella woke up from her sleep sweating profusely. She blinked a few times and looked around the room. Her tears started falling again.

After years of living abroad with her family, Stella had finally returned to her hometown. When she first proposed the idea to go back to Korea, it was strongly opposed by her parents; saying that she’s their only daughter, how much they would miss her, being 21 is too young to travel alone, and how could she survive being by herself in an unfamiliar place. She just laughed whenever those thoughts crossed her mind. Sipping her drink, she looked outside the window of the café.

“Oppa, the weather is very nice today.” She smiled and grabbed a pen to write in her note book.

Day 7 in Korea

Oppa, I’m here in your favorite café again. You liked Iced Americano and strawberry cheesecake right? I used to laugh at you when you ordered those, but now I know why you liked them. Oppa, it’s been a week. I still haven’t seen him. Isn’t this café his favorite too? Didn’t he like coming here every Thursday? I only have three weeks left.

She was walking home that evening when she stumbled upon a cute dog under a lamp post. She squatted down and petted the dog. A warm feeling rushed all over her body. Thinking it might be lost, she took a look at the collar for its name.

“Mun--”

“Gomdor-ah!” Stella turned and saw a man walking towards her. She quickly stood up. “Oh hello. This is my dog.” The man smiled and picked up the dog from the pavement.

“It’s cute.” She smiled back. “Uh I need to go home. Bye Gomdori!” She waved and ran away from there because the sun was already setting. The moment she arrived home, she sighed, relieved. “Huu~ Lucky I made it home before dark. Or else, I would be lost. And embarrassed!” 

Oppa, I met a cute dog named Gomdori. A dog named after a bear; isn’t it funny?

It was her first day working at a bookstore. She was so excited; she even came there two hours before the store opened. When her boss told her what she needed to do, she smiled. And there she was, stacking new books on the shelves. Just smelling the scent of new books could make her happy.

“You work here?” Stella heard a voice. She looked behind; a man was smiling at her.

“Ah yes…” That was when she realized. “You? Gomdori?” The man laughed at her response.

“Gomdori is my dog’s name, not mine.” She grinned, embarrassed. The man then looked at his watch. “I need to go. See you again soon.” When he walked out of the bookstore, Stella continued doing her job.

Day 10 in Korea

Oppa, I started working at your favorite bookstore today. My first task was stacking books. It was super easy and super fun! And I met the dog’s owner; inside the store, without the dog. Hahaha. I don’t even know why I laugh thinking about it.

Stella started making friends with two staffs named Andy and Justin. They always helped her with her work, showed her around town when they had free time, and took her to new places to eat every day. 

“Andy, let’s go to that café for lunch today?” Justin asked his friend who was helping Stella.

“Which café?” She asked, curious.

“It’s two blocks from here.” Andy smiled at the girl. “So, you’re on?”

“Heyyy oppa, are you thinking of leaving me alone?” She pouted at the two guys.

“I thought café food wouldn’t suit your appetite.” The two laughed.

“I eat anything edible okay? Huh!” She stomped her feet away from there. The two knew she was upset, they ran after her.

“I was just joking. How about I treat you for lunch today?” Andy tried to apologize.

“You two always treat me for lunch. And dinner. And breakfast.” Stella replied, making the two giggled.

“How about we go the amusement park when we get the same day off?” She abruptly stopped hearing Justin’s suggestion, and the two guys almost hit each other.

“Deal!” She turned and smiled.

Day 14 in Korea

Oppa, Andy oppa and Justin oppa are so good to me. Oh did I tell you they’re one year younger than you? They treat me like their sister. And I missed you today more than yesterday, oppa. Do you miss me too?

As soon as Stella saw the café, she flashed a smile.

“Hey this is my favorite café too!” She held their arms and pulled them inside. Seeing her usual table was vacant, she made her way there and quickly took a seat facing the counter.

“You always come here?” Justin asked after they placed their order. “I thought you said you’ve only been here for two weeks?”

“This is the only café I knew I need to go to if I ever make it to Korea.” 

They started eating the moment their food arrived. Because it was passed lunch time, only a few tables were occupied. While talking and laughing, a person suddenly walked to their table.

“You again!” Justin choked on his food hearing the excited voice, and Andy patted his back. Stella recognized the voice; she smiled as she looked up.

“You work here?” She asked seeing the man wearing a chef uniform. He smiled.

“Stella, who is he?” Andy asked when Justin had recovered.

“An acquaintance.” She replied.

“Now a friend.” The chef added. The two looked at each other, smiling. Andy and Justin just shrugged.

Oppa, I met the dog’s owner again. He works at the café. Maybe you knew him if I tell you his name. But I don’t know his name yet.

The next day, Stella went to the café after work because she had promised to meet up with the chef. His shift had ended, so the two new friends just casually chatted and laughed while sitting at Stella’s favorite table in the café. It was his favorite seat too. And she finally knew his name.

Day 15 in Korea

Oppa, I met him. I met Eric oppa! He is now the owner of the café.

Since that day, Stella became closer to Eric. They always met up for dinner at the café. She didn’t mind though, because that place held a special meaning to a person close to her.

“You always wear that necklace?” Eric suddenly asked, pointing at the silver chain on Stella’s neck. She held the pendant in her hand.

“Someone gave this to me.” She smiled while staring at the pendant. And when she looked up, Eric was staring at it too; his face seemed surprised.

“I used to have one like that. And I gave it to my— um… best friend.” Eric sipped his drink, nervous.

“Really? You must’ve really loved your best friend then.”

“I still do. Even though he left me without saying a word.” Stella knew Eric felt hurt reminiscing the memories. And she felt guilty.

Day 18 in Korea

Oppa, he still loves you. He remembers your necklace. Should I tell him the truth?

“Tell him to let me go.”

Again, she woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t go back to sleep, even though it was only 3 o'clock. She just lied on the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling.

Stella went to work with puffy eyes. Andy and Justin were worried, so they went to talk to her.

“Anything wrong?” Andy patted her shoulder.

“I had trouble sleeping. That’s all.” She smiled and started doing her work. The two didn’t buy her excuse though. After work, she didn’t want to see Eric because she was still contemplating. Her dreams the last few nights seemed too real to ignore. She knew it was a sign, but she just wasn’t ready. A week passed since her last meeting with the chef. She still hadn’t make up her mind so she thought she wouldn’t see him just yet.

Day 25 in Korea

Oppa, I’m not ready. What if he hates me after that? By now, you would have said to me, “Just do it Stella. It’s now or never.” Right oppa? Oh oppa, I missed hearing your voice.

“Hi Stella.” She heard Eric’s voice when she walked out of the bookstore. He came to see her.

“Hi.” She smiled and continued walking. Eric knew something was wrong, so he followed the girl.

“You didn’t come to the café.”

“I didn’t.”

“Is there anything troubling you?”

“Nope.”

“Is it because of me?” Stella stopped walking. She turned to look at Eric.

“Oppa, let’s sit somewhere. I have something to talk to you.” Seeing the serious expression on her face, Eric nodded and pulled her towards the nearest park. They settled on a bench, facing the playground.

“I used to come here often. With my best friend.” Eric started the conversation.

“I know.” Eric looked at Stella, his eyes widened.

“W-what do you mean you know?” She let out a sigh and took off her necklace. Holding the pendant in her hand, she showed him its back. Eric was surprised when he saw a word carved on it. It was a name. His name.

“Actually, this belonged to my brother. He had your name carved before he gave it to me.” She explained; her eyes glistened with tears. Eric wanted to ask but he couldn’t find the right words. “His name was Steve. Steve Jung.”

“W-was?” Eric asked; his lips were trembling.

“He was sick.” She took a deep breath before continued. “He’s in heaven now.”

A 17-year-old girl was lying on the grass with her 22-year-old brother outside their house. The two were staring at the bright summer sky.

“Oppa, when will you go back to Korea? I want to go with you.”

“I won’t. I’m staying here for good.”

“Why??”

“I would hurt my best friend if I return.”

“Did you two fight? Aishh boys always fight.”

“We don’t fight. But we would, once he knows I left him.”

“Why did you leave him?”

“I have my reason. If you ever go there, could you do me a favor?”

“Anything for my sweet oppa.”

“Promise me you’d find my best friend and tell him why I left.”

Oppa, I did it. I told him the truth. I gave him your letters. And I’m giving this book to him too. You wouldn’t mind, right oppa?

I’m coming home. I love you, Steve oppa. Forever and always. – Stella J.

Stella was crying when she left the park. She had accomplished her mission so it was time to go back home to her parents. Eric was left with a box full of Steve’s memories. Tears streaming down his face as he looked at the contents of the box. He then opened the note book given by Stella right at the page marked with a piece of an old movie ticket.

Day 162 in LA

I'm sorry I forgot you, forgive me for that. I wanted to keep all the promises I made.

Without you I was alone and I lived thinking of you. I'm sorry that I couldn't show you that.

It seemed like it would be for eternity. It seemed that I lived just for you.

The thing is that my feelings won't go and change. You won't even believe me, so I forgot about you.

I'm sorry I forgot you. I believed that I couldn't. I had planned to wait for you until the day I died.

You won't love me or anyone else. I'm sorry that I can preserve my feelings.

I have to forget all my memories of loving you, Eric.

"Hyesungie..." That night, Eric missed his best friend more than he ever did. 

A/N: The last note book entry is the lyrics of "미안해... 널 잊어서...(I'm Sorry I Forgot You)" from Shin Hyesung's Love of May Special Edition. Translations acquired from Google search.