Do listen to this piano piece when you read, it helps to build the mood.

Yiruma - Till I find you (YirumaLOVE)

Yiruma - Destiny of love (zmriri) ~ (This is the music compostition Taemin supposing played, play this when you read his thoughts)

“Ring-ah…Ring-ah…Ring-ah……”

“Minho…………” I mumbled groggily as I flipped my body towards the left side of the bed, grazing my palm across the soft mattress and eyes shot open as I grasped nothing. His side of the bed was cold and an uneasy vibe spread through my body. I can’t help thinking where he could have been so early in the morning.

 Glancing at the alarm clock on the table, it was only 7 o’clock. He would usually still be cuddling in bed with me at this time. Feeling uncomfortable by his absence, I got up from the bed and quickly get dressed in loose robes as I strolled out of our bedroom looking for him.

“Minho hyung…………” I called out as I stepped out into the living room, our practice room then to the kitchen and lastly his study room. The whole house was empty, it was weird….Knitting my eyebrows, I scanned all the rooms again until my eyes caught hold of bright pink sticky note pasted on top of a music score resting on the piano stand.

Walking towards the grand piano situated in the centre of the living room, I peeled of the note and read the words written on it.

For you, Minnie

Destiny of love

I’m destined to love you this lifetime

Don’t ever doubt my love for you

From your Minho hyung

A faint smile formed on my lips as I grabbed the music score in my hands and took a minute to sight read the music composition. Settling myself on the piano bench, I curled my fingers above the row of keys of the grand piano and prepared myself for the performance. Exhaling a deep breath, I wobbled my stiff shoulders slightly before pressing my fingers down firmly, letting my fingers glided assertively across the piano keys.

A distant melody resonated in the air filling the empty room and I could feel an uninhibited poetic flow of music seeping through my fingers as I got lost in the rich nostalgic tune. An indescribable sense of passion and struggle floated in my mind as the rhythm of the melody quickens. The swiftness of every note hit the base of my heart carrying a familiar gush of anticipation that reminded me of the excitement coursing through my veins every time I met you. The fluttering sensation I had for you that you never seem to notice at first. But it was the same sensation that made me understand my deep intrinsic desire of wanting to be with you forever. You were the destined one for me; the love of my life.

As we got closer, we gradually got together, my feelings for you got stronger. I remember the incessant happiness pouring out of my soul as I walked down the designated isle into your embrace that I know was rightfully mine. But as time passed, I found that being with you wasn’t easy because we were so different; two distinct individuals. We have different goal in life, goals that contradicted each other and it made us drifted apart as we tried to pursue our own dreams.

I could feel the struggle that torn our hearts when we parted cruising in the harmonious music. It was the day when I’ve gained freedom away from you. I thought I was finally free but I gradually became lost in the boundless emptiness without you beside me. I was battling within if I’ve made the right choice to let you go.  Whether I could have really forget the thread of love that was holding me back to you. Whether I’ve could stop myself running down the endless stairs into your embrace because it was an impossible journey. I’ve tried to give up on you and I was slowly able to restraint myself. Gradually I was able to distanced myself from you.

But when I saw you again in the hospital on the day you’ve decided to end your life. I finally knew that I could never totally let you go because seeing you devastated made my heart bleed, causing an unstoppable bitterness jet up my throat as I glisten tears. I could feel the pain searing in your eyes that very night. It was a reflection that you have given up hope, thinking that ending your life was your only choice left. Having a twist thought that there was nothing more for you to live for.

You have simply forgotten the fact that I was still here, willing to be with you like I’ve promised.  You had forgotten the fact that I’ve wanted to be the river of life that brings you the courage to overcome every obstacle. And it was only then did I truly understand the meaning of love; the deep yearning I had to give up everything for you to make you live again, making you my most precious hyung live again. To simply just see you breathing in front of me even if I was to give up my life for you I was willing too so I merely gave you my hands. The hands to replace the ones you’ve lost to fulfill your dreams being a pianist.

I don’t deny that there was times where I would be infuriated with you for all the horrible things you’ve done to me.  I did loathed the fact that you’ve never seems to be grateful for what I’ve done for you. It not like I’m trying to ask for your gratitude because I know I’m the one that had willingly sacrificed all these things for you in my own accord but why don’t you understand that all I wanted was your acknowledgement and you insensitively ignored my needs. Instead you had tried all these years to shove me away with your cruel words and cold gestures that I know were all means to hide your regrets towards me. I know you still love me but you were struggling to come with terms with yourself. I know you’re hurting that why I’ve endured all the pain to be with you because I didn’t want you to suffer all these alone. You still have me, the boy that had promised to love you even how difficult life would be.

Tears streaked down my cheeks as the melodious music gradually comes to an end. Its surreal melody made me reminiscence my whole life journey with you, all the hardships and troubles of love we went through.  It wasn’t a route that was blessed with sunshine all the time but the rain and storm had made us closer to a point that love is not the only energy kept us together anymore. It was all this unforgettable experience we had preserved through that had made me appreciate every moment I ever spent with you. Although, I still don’t know if there would be happiness waiting for us in the end but I clearly know I want to accompany you along this journey till we both part away to heaven.

I love you, Minho hyung.

I’m sorry that I have never told you in words how much I’ve loved you.

“Sniff…..Sniff…………”

“Minho hyung…...where‘re you, come out …………….”

“Aish……..sniff………….….how could you make me cry and just hide away??” I screeched as I paced around the house, searching for him.

“Hyung, I’m going to be angry with you if you don’t appear right now………” I threatened irately as I continued shouting out his name but the only replies I got was the echoes of my voices vibrating from the walls of the large empty house. He was not in sight at all.

When I was on the verge of giving up, I sank my weight down onto the piano seat trying to catch my hitching breathes as I stared blanking at the music score sitting on the piano stand and a slotted slip of paper behind of the music scores grabbed hold of my attention. What’s this…..A written letter?? I thought as I gritted my teeth and read its contents.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taemin-ah,

                       Mianhae. There are a lot of things I wanted to say to you personally but I don’t think I have the chance anymore, I’m leaving Minnie and you don’t have to come searching for me. I won’t do anything foolish like before, I know how precious life is now since I have you by my side all these years. You made me felt blessed to be breathing because I love waking up in bed with you in my arms. Glancing at you…my angelic sleeping beauty, I’ve always longed to press a sweet kiss on your lips, waiting patiently for your eyelids to flicker open and your cheeks to blush bashfully pink.

                    Honestly, I want to be with you forever but I know I can’t be so selfish. I know being with me makes you feel miserable and I have been really apologetic for everything I have put you through. It is about time I should set you free. I’m thankful for everything you done for me. Taemin-ah, I really want you to be happy so from today onwards please live your life for yourself. Don’t force yourself to do anything you don’t like anymore. You don’t have to be a pianist for my sake, I’ve learnt to move on and don’t worry about me, I will use the rest of my life to find another dream to live for and you should too.  

                 Lastly, before I go I want to give you this music composition. It’s a melody I’ve written for you many years ago. I’ve named it….Destiny of love. I have always believed we were destined to love each other in this lifetime but……….I guessed it’s too hard after all……I’m sorry…………..

To the Minnie I’ll always love

From your most beloved Minho hyung

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eish, when will you grow up, Minho hyung?? You’re still as willful and selfish as usual. Do you think I’ll be happier without you by my side?? How could you be so blind to not notice that I’ve never regretted anything I’ve done for you? We are fated to be together, you pabo………..I muttered gloomily as I wiped away my falling tears……….

Dammit, now I need to go searching for you. Do you really hate me that much, hyung?? Why the heck do you always make me suffer?? Luckily, I think I know where you will be at, your thoughts are too easy to predict…………I thought inwardly as I found my iphone and called my manager.

Taemin: Hyung, can you help me to cancel the interview I have today. There is something important I have to do now….Mhm……… can you help me to book a ferry ticket to Jeju Island too.

Manager: Yah!!!! Lee Taemin-ah, what the hell are you doing…going to Jeju Island??? I can’t cancel the interview this minute. I heard the author interviewing you is really on his way to your house and don’t you remember you have sea sickness. How can you to take the ferry??? You’ll fall sick.

Taemin: Hyung, stop grumbling….what choice do I have??? I’ve checked all the air tickets to Jeju this morning were fully booked but I really need reach there as soon as possible and catch him before he runs away. Please help me to apologize to the author I don’t think I can meet him today. I’m leaving my house soon.

Manager: Dammit, Taemin….you can’t do this to me………..Yah!!!! what am I going to say to him…………..

Taemin: I’m sorry, hyung………bye……….

I snapped my Iphone shut as I got changed at the speed of light before dashing out of the door. Unknowingly, I knocked head on into a figure standing right at the doorway causing him to let out a loud whimper.

“Mianhae……” I bowed and apologized to the boy in front of me as I tried to make a run to my car but he blocked me. He stood at the doorway with his hands stretched out blocking my path. Chewing on my lips to prevent the frustration boiling in me, I said in the most politely voice I could muster. “Can you excuse me, Sir. I have a ferry to catch” as I shoved him to the side with a hard push.

“Taemin-issi. I’m Kim Kibum, the author from SM entertainment that will be writing your biography. We have an interview scheduled this morning, you can’t leave………” he said, tagging behind me as I ignored him and got into my car, turning the ignition to get ready to drive off. Sensing that I was going to drive away, he opened the metal door and jumped into my car. Damn, I’m now stuck with him.

Gosh, I didn’t know how it all happened but all I know now is that the both of us, me and him…what’s his name again??? Yah, I can’t remember, anyway.............we were staring at each other on the top deck of the ferry on our way to Jeju Island. Aish, I can’t stand the swaying of the ferry that was making my head churned and waves of nauseating sensation to gag up my throat. Rubbing onto my chest, I tried to suppress the urge to vomit as I leaned my weight onto the metal bar.

“Taemin-issi, gwenchana??? You looked really pale. You have sea sickness too?? I bought some medication just now, there is still some left….come take it too…it’ll make you feel better. ” he commented, sliding a bottle of water and packet of pills into my hands. Without protesting, I swallowed down the medication and gradually felt better as time went by.

“Hey….what’s your name??” I questioned the quiet pallor-looking boy, trying to break the awkwardness that was lingering between us.

“Kim….Kibum …but you can call me key…………..” he answered, gawping at me with astonishment as though he had never expected me to willingly speak to him.

“key-issi…….Why are you so interested in writing my biography??To be enduring the uneasiness of sea-sickness and still come scurrying after me up the ferry………....Actually, I’m really sorry if I’ve caused you any inconvenience. You know you could actually just arrange another time with my manager for the interview….you don’t have to go this extra mile….”I commented earnestly, glancing apologetically at him.

“Aish, it’s ok…really. Frankly speaking, I don’t know too. I’ve always love your piano pieces and your concert performances. It always strikes me what could make a young boy like you play such touching melodies?? Was it the love for music or is there more to it. Since my mother always told me behind everything beautiful there hides some kind of pain so I just want to find out if it’s true….I want to jot down all the hardships in your life that we, outsiders don’t know about because I think it would make more readers appreciate the silence beauty of your piano masterpieces that had made me smile with happiness and cry in sadness through the years I’ve listen to your music.” he explained nervously as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“humph, I see….I have never thought of myself as such an inspirational pianist but I guess if one knows more about me, one might learn to slowly appreciate music as much as I do considering that I’ve used 23 years to understand myself and my bounded affinity with music. How I changed from a defiant, stubborn kid that swear to hate music his whole life to a young boy who had played the piano solely for sake of someone else to a young man that had fall love with the magnificence of music that was made to touch one’s life….touch my………..no touch all our lifes. ”

“…uhm…………………………..”

“Do you know that every melody conceals a hidden story that sparks a multitude of emotions depending how one perceive it. No melody is static, it’s poignant……if only you would feel its melodious tune caress your gentle soul…….” I continued as my thoughts drifted to the melody I had played this morning. Destiny of love…………

Till I find you, Minho hyung

You’ll believe in our destiny…..

 Vagel:

             Super fast update back to Taemin POV, hope you enjoy reading it.. Anyway, the next chapter should be the final one if nothing goes wrong. Please do comment and subscribe. Thanks alot.