Chapter One

A Matter of the Heart
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(Jinyoung's POV)   Jinyoung unlocked the door, sighing deeply. He was exhausted, and all he wanted to do was fall into bed. His boyfriend was probably already there, sleeping soundly. Making his way up the stairs, he froze when he heard a shushing sound from inside the room. Opening the door, he saw his boyfriend in bed...with another guy beside him. All feelings of fatigue turned to anger as he stormed out of the apartment. There was nothing to say, and he noticed that his boyfriend...ex-boyfriend...didn't even go after him. That showed just how much he cared. He would rather some little than have a real relationship. He had just thrown it all out the window.    Fumbling with his keys, Jinyoung left quickly. He texted his friend, Dongwoo as he drove, hoping he would still be awake. He needed somewhere to stay.    When he got there he was welcomed in, but neither of them spoke. Dongwoo simply offered him a beer, taking his ever present glasses off and setting them beside the television.   Jinyoung shook his head, feeling tears stinging his eyes. What had gone wrong? His boyfriend of three years was cheating on him...Dongwoo had told him a few weeks ago that the bastard was cheating, but Jinyoung had been too blind to see it. Now he felt like a stupid fool for falling for the same lies during their fights time after time and not listening to his best friend. Instead he had gotten mad at his friend, in favor of his boyfriend.   Turning to Dongwoo, Jinyoung offered a weak, watery smile. "How is it that you're always right?" Leaning into Dongwoo's side, he began to feel the effect of the alcohol in his system as he drifted off to sleep. They hadn't said much, but it hadn't been needed. Dongwoo had just been the same as always; the friend that had his back, no matter what.     Dongwoo shook his head. "I don't want to talk about who's right or wrong here. He was the one that was wrong for cheating on you, and you deserve much better. Just relax and stay where you are, okay? This is a safe place for you."   Jinyoung nodded, smiling. He was tired and mentally exhausted. Squeezing Dongwoo's hand, he let himself fall completely into the darkness of sleep.   Dongwoo smiled sadly as he picked his friend up and carried him to the guest room. He needed to sleep this off, and Dongwoo would deal with the bastard that had broken Jinyoung's heart himself. Right now, he needed to take care of his friend. Pulling the blanket up, he turned off the light and went to his own bedroom.    However, it took a while for him to fall asleep. Jinyoung's broken heart was bothering him. It felt as if his own heart was being ripped out and he wasn't sure if he could take it.    

 

As time went by, Jinyoung began to see that leaving his cheating boyfriend was the best thing he could have done. He was happier, once he got over the initial heartache that came with the breakup. He found a place with a friend of his, Gongchan. He was younger than Jinyoung by two years, but they were very close. He always seemed to know what to say without prying, so was the perfect choice for a roommate...next to Dongwoo, who would have been his first choice. Dongwoo already had enough roommates. Jinyoung didn't want to be a pain and ask him, so he was moving in with Gongchan.    Two months after leaving, Jinyoung saw Gongchan in the living room. He had just hung up his phone and looked very excited. "What's up?" he asked tentatively.    Gongchan's dark eyes were very bright. "There's going to be a pool party at a friend's house and I was wondering if you wanted to go. Of course you can invite Dongwoo," Gongchan grinned at him, showing his scary aegyo. It had never been his strong point.   Jinyoung sighed. He really didn't want to go to a party, but he would for Gongchan's sake. "Okay," he answered quietly. "I'll invite Dongwoo."   Gongchan bounded off the couch, full of energy. "Cool! I can't wait! It'll be this weekend."   Jinyoun
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Amalya
#1
Chapter 8: I did enjoy this overall. The writing is definitely solid and I don't think I found many (if any) typos so kudos there. It's also a pretty well thought out plot, though the love triangle scenario is nothing new. However, the little twists with the secret admirer and whatnot gave it a slightly different spin, even if he was rather obvious. lol It was fun to see Sandeul open up bit by bit though. And it really set things up for the ending rather neatly.

I will say that things felt like they moved a bit quickly. It was always as if we were landing right in the middle of what was changing or happening without a great deal of development. While it keeps the story moving so that you don't run the risk of it feeling slow or that it's dragging, it also felt like we were skipping scenes that could have added more insight into the characters.

I have no problem with the switching POV's, especially since you made sure to let us know when there was a change up, but I would recommend keeping person specific reactions to the person in mind, especially when the other speaker is nowhere in sight. What I mean by that is when one person (like Dongwoo) is having a text conversation with a friend (I think it was Jinyoung), he wouldn't have been able to see the latter 'smiling' even if he was since they were separated at the time. Also, you may want to double check in the first chapter with Sandeul disappearing in the crowd but then a little further down you have him still at the bar.

I enjoyed the resolution though and it's a nice change from having someone left out as I might have expected initially. I don't know that the was needed but seeing them sort of work things out the way they did was enjoyable in the end. So good job on finishing it and getting everything smoothed out. I'm still kind of curious who hosted the party in the beginning to start with but for the most part, my questions were all answered in the story. Thank you for sharing!
amccurdy31 #2
Chapter 1: my poor sanduel it kills me to see him like this. even in a fic
MisheeFrancheska
#3
Chapter 8: ok ?. where am I ?! hehe~ ngl .. I love your fic. so much and hope u know tat! . I just kind of feel like .. the whole story is a bit In rush ?. . idk anymore ! hoho. and the kills me ! I didn't expect that at all ! .and *sobs* at my Deullie forever the bottom !! .. I'm not complaining thought ! ohoho
Ladyqueen #4
Chapter 8: Uh, it has ended:((
I really enjoyed reading your story, but I would like to hive some feedback and also to say some things, I didn't like that much.
To begin with something I didn't like that much, I'm not a fan of first POV, I like third POV more, but that's just my personal opinion, so it's fine :)
And the second point is relatad to the first, because in my opinion changing the POV much, makes the story uneasy to read, but like the first point, that's just my opinion.
The last point would be the timeskip that you added. It's not easy to write something like this, because people change and because of that their relation to each other changes to, so a timeskip can be confusing, but in this story... I don't like it, but I don't dislike it, either.
To come to the positiv things (don't think I just wanted to criticize you, there were many good things as well) the idea was reslly cute, kind of main but that's not something bad. You said that many readers were confused but I personally don't think it was hard to get. I'm really sad that the story has already ended and I hope that you'll write more B1A4 stories, so hope to se you again ^^

(And sorry for the long comment)
MisheeFrancheska
#5
Chapter 6: JinDeul FTW ! ^^. tysm for this update !
Ladyqueen #6
Chapter 6: Poor dongwoonie, but thanks to sandeul and jinyoung, he is ok, now...
I hope he'll fall for sandeul soon, but I'm a little afraid that when he falls for sandeul, sandeul has already fallen for his admirer...
But even though: THANK YOU, you really updated!
I can't wait for the next chapter ^^
Ladyqueen #7
Chapter 3: Hey there~
i really like this story and your idea. I hope you upload the new chapter fast, because I love reading this fic. Poor Sandeulie, I hope, in the end he'll be able to get my cute Dongwoo...
However, I'll look foreward for the new chapter :)
MisheeFrancheska
#8
Chapter 3: yay ! I love this update ! ^^v . so glad that Jinyoung might have some feelings towards Deullie !