Bad Dreams

One Friday evening in the girls’ dorm, Hyesang and Hyomi were chilling at the lobby. They were delightfully chatting when Soowook came to join them.

“Hyesang~ah, where is Sangra?” she asked as she sat down on the chair across her.

“Hmmm… wae? I think she’s still at the library.” She replied as she leaned both her arms on the table.

“I just went there but I didn’t see her.” She said propping her chin onto her hand. “I wanted to ask her about Yunho sunbae.”

“Speaking of sunbae~nim, how does Sangra knew him?” Hyomi asked to Hyesang. “Did you know that they’re close?”

“No, I don’t.” she responded. “Sangra said she met him last summer when they attended a charitable event where their Dad was invited. Then he encouraged her and Xiumin oppa to volunteer in a free dance workshop for children.”

“Dance workshop?” Hyomi asked, trying to clarify what she just said. Hyesang nodded. “But Sangra can’t dance, right? What did she do there?”

“She can’t dance? But how come she speaks as if she knows a lot about it?” Soowook asked a little bit surprised at the fact that Hyomi stated. She once showed her a dance piece she practiced and Sangra made some remarks on the movements and pointed out where she was lacking.

“Well… technically…” Hyesang was uncertain of what to answer. “How can I say it…?” How can I explain it to them? Ah! Sangra~ya will definitely kill me if I told them. It is something that she really doesn’t want others to know. What should I do? She said to herself as she think of other excuse to tell them indirectly of Sangra’s situation. “Actually, she DON’T dance…” CAN’T is certainly different from DON’T “she handled the registration and stuffs alike at that camp so I guess that’s why she knows something about it by watching since she was there the whole summer.”

“I see.” Soowook nodded believing Hyesang’s words. “But---” she was interrupted when Sangra came to pass by carrying on his back a fully stuffed bag-pack.

“Hey, where are you going?” Hyomi asked.

“We got a permission to go home.” She answered briefly.

“We? Why are you going home?” Hyesang uttered with no any clue.

“Did you forget? Tomorrow is Mom’s death anniversary.” She replied, somehow Sangra’s voice still sounds a little bit sad in Hyesang’s ears every time she mention anything about her mother. Every year they offer a ceremony and went to the cemetery in remembrance for her mother’s death.

“Want me to come along?” Hyesang asked her friend. Ah, I forgot! Will she be alright? She said to herself remembering the year when she hasn’t been with her when they visited her mother’s grave. They went out of the country at that time. She heard from Sangra’s father that after going at the cemetery she suddenly disappeared, they found her in front of Hyesang house crying all alone. So, every year Hyesang always makes sure that she went with her so she won’t cry alone all night after.

“It’s okay. Don’t worry.” Sangra said curving a smile on her lips reassuring her. “So, see you guys on Monday. I have to go now. Minseok oppa is waiting for me outside already.”

“Okay, bye!” the three girls bid her goodbye.

 It was a very fine day. The air has a fresh breeze feeling on the skin. A good day to be outside to appreciate the pleasantness of the beauty of spring time and Kai, along with his friends, was out in the open ground of the campus. They were hanging out under the shade of a big tree not far from their dormitory. He was leaning his back at the tree’s trunk and eyes close with furrowed brow. He was silence while the others where fooling around, making fun of each other.

AH, FUDGE! You’re so stupid Kai for quitting XDC! Kai irritatedly chastised himself. Since the day he quitted the club Krystal was ignoring him. He tried approaching her for a lot of times but the girl keeps on brushing him off. What else could I do to get Krystal’s attention again? Then Sangwook’s amazed face while Lay was dancing and how Lay pulled and step up to protect her from him flashback in his mind. He was more riled up with that recollection. “AH, DAMMIT!” He exploded as he punched his fist on the ground.

His friends looked all at the same time to him. They were startled with his sudden outburst.

“What’s the prob man?” Baekhyun asked but Kai didn’t say anything he just reclined his back again at the tree and closed his eyes. Baekhyun turned his gazed at the others with a look of asking what’s-the-matter kind of way.

“I think Krystal is snubbing him that’s why he’s like that.” Sehun hinted, which was partly true.

“That’s what he got for quitting XDC in exchange of joining a lame group for nothing.” Kris tauntingly enunciated. Kai just creased his brow more, holding back his self to react on what Kris said.

“Are they really that lame? I mean, have you even seen them dance?” Baekhyun asked out. “I saw Sangra and that transferee the other day when I passed by the studio. I could say that the transferee was good. She got the looks… she got the moves.”

“And she got to see you on your boxers.” Tao mischievously added up on what he said.

“Yah! How did you know that?” Baekhyun asked, surprised. He never told any one about it.

“I heard it from Chanyeol.” Tao said laughing on Baekhyun’s reaction. The others were laughing with him. “But seriously, are you really sure that she’s really good or you just saying that because you’re interested at her?”

“Geez, I don’t like her, okay?!” Baekhyun defensively responded. “I’m just saying what I saw.”

“Well, honestly the other girls were not as good as Kai or that Lay was but they can bust a move. They have rhythm… not so good but they can follow.” Tao tried to criticize as to agree with Baekhyun. Among them, he and Kai were the ones who saw how their supposedly members danced. “Right Kai?” he inquired to Kai who has no interest in answering back. Tao rolled his eyes on him when he really didn’t say anything.

 “So what are you guys implying then?” Sehun asked. “Are you trying to say that we should reconsider grouping with them?”

“Well, there’s nothing bad about it if we try, right?” Tao challenged. “Besides, aren’t you insulted by what that school president said to us?”

Everyone was looking at each other as if they were contemplating something in their minds. Even Kai was caught on what Tao said. His attention was now focused on them, thinking like what others were thinking too.

Monday came…

“Where is Sangra?” Chanyeol asked to Hyesang who kept on looking at her watch. Their class is about to start any moment. Hyesang just shook her head not knowing what happen to her to be absent. She hasn’t return back after going home. She doesn’t receive any text from her or even a call. She was getting worried more and more knowing her friend’s condition.

“Hyesang~ah, that’s Sangra’s brother, right?” Soowook said pointing at the door’s direction as she recognized a guy with their teacher just outside the room. 

They saw him talking to their teacher. Hyesang wanted to go out to ask him but she can sense some seriousness on their conversation because both of them were not even smiling. Sympathy was registered on the teacher’s face. She becomes more worried because she has this hunch of what they were discussing about. Hyesang caught his eyes when he momentary looked at their direction but he just smile at her and returned his gaze at the teacher. After a moment he bowed to him and went on his way to his own class.

“Seonsaeng~nim, what does Minseok oppa just said?” Hyesang couldn’t help her self to ask. 

“It’s nothing, he just informed me that Sangra is going to be absent for today.” the teacher stated. “Anyways, good morning class!” he greeted diverting his attention to everyone as he open his record book to start calling them one by one for attendance checking.

Hyesang took out her phone under her desk, checking if her friend contacted her… but nothing. She immediately composed a short message asking what happen to her and send it after. She waited for a reply but still nothing. I should have come with her. But she was already coping better these previous years. What could have happen to her? She couldn’t do anything but sigh and wait for their class to be over so she can ask Xiumin herself.

A little girl in her pretty white ballet dress was gracefully twirling around in sync with the music playing while she was on a stage. As she elegantly dances, the spotlights were focused on her. Everyone was clapping their hands, amazed in her performance. Then suddenly, the lights turned off one by one. The little girl was left alone in the dark.

“Eomma! Eomma!” the little girl cried out.

Then as she turned around, she saw her mom running towards her…

“Sangra~ya!” her mother called out. Out of nowhere a speeding car knocked her mother hard, made her swirl above the car and fall on the ground with twisted arm and leg. Blood was oozing out under her head.

“EOOMMMMA!”

It was middle of the night when Sangra’s father, Heechul, was rushing to her room and knocking at her door. He heard her screaming as she wailed. The door was locked. He sprinted out to where he puts the spare keys. When he saw the key that he needed, he immediately grabbed it and pinned it in the keyhole of Sangra’s door. He hurried to her side and held her tight in his arms.

“Ssshhh… It’s just a dream, sweetie… just a dream.” Her father tried to console her as he gently patted her back.  

“Appa… I’m… I’m so sorry, appa… it’s my entire fault…” she cried out in between her howling. “I’m so sorry… because of me… m-mom… mom is….”

“Stop it, sweetie… it’s an accident… stop blaming yourself!” It was really hard on him every time seeing her in this kind of state.

He was so worried because her nightmares were back again. After visiting Soohee’s grave yesterday something inside her snapped and she was all silent and spacing out. She was like that every year as they memorialized their mother’s death. Just these passed years, she was blankly looking at nothing but you can still talk sensibly at her. But it was different this time. It seems like when she grieved so much few fresh years back when their mom died. She locked herself in her room after returning home. She was supposed to return to school this morning with her brother but she didn’t go out her room all day.

Heechul doesn’t know what to do anymore. Two days had passed and Sangra was still in her state of depression. The next morning he called his friend, Dr. Jung - the psychiatrist that looked after Sangra before an