Free Falling

Author : Natocuty

Genre : Angst

Status : Completed

Title ( 9/10 )

Your title isn't really eye catching but it fits your story perfectly, I can somehow just imagine(after reading your story) Soohyun slowly drifting down with those angel wings of hers, I know this isn't related to angels at all, but it gives me that kind of imagination y'know xD

Description & Foreword ( 9/10 )

I like how that one(just one) sentence describes the whole story perfectly, if you were to add more words to it I don't think it will give off the same type of feel so 7 points for that, but apparently I can't really give you full points for this section because you left your foreword blank ): but good job on the one sentence description though!

Grammar & Language ( 20/20 )

Your grammar and language is absolutely perfect, the words, the vocabulary, I had to read your story again and again to find mistakes, I only found 1 or 2, but those mistakes wer probably just careless mistakes. "To return to the innocent young girl, who had no concerns/worries in the world." I think that sounds more right xD I replaced 'cares' with the bold words if you can't really notice. Your story is long so I lost count on which line this is xD and one more... "But she grew tired of putting up a fight," I think 'up' fits more than 'on'. There aren't any other mistakes, well not that I know off sooooo full points for this section! :D

Character ( 20/20 )

When I read the story halfway, I wanted to call Soohyun stupid for commiting suicide just cause her social life is ruined, not until I read that her parents detests her too, that, I wouldn't call stupid. I know that basically this whole story revolves around Soohyun and only Soohyun so you did a great job and explaining what she is like, how strong or weak she is. She is apparently really strong but of course, everyone will get tired of being strong one day. I know Myungsoo is supposed to be some kind of cameo, but more Myungsoo moments please, haha.

Originality & Storyline ( 20/20 )

The thing I like about this story is that it isn't only for entertainment, but it tells people that the words they say, even the smallest hurtful things can make someone else collapse and that smiling is just like a mask to protect yourself. I really like the moral of the story and the message it tells. I don't know, but most writers would find it hard to write a story AND convey a message at the same time so I think that you did a really good job! Everytime I read your story, I would have a tiny urge to cry because it's just so sad, oh and I like how you described her death too. Death seems dark and scary, but somehow you described death beautifully for a depressed person that is finally having peace, I totally salute to you! I wish I can write as good as you though, haha.

Overall ( 78/80 )

I really liked your one shots overall, even though it's just a one shot, you managed to explain everything; how she became that depressed; how Myungsoo got 'brainwashed' by popularity, really well without having to rush. Most writers would rush subconsciously whilst they try to explain everything so that the readers would understand. You're such a talented writer! I'm even reading your other stories since all the Infinite fics I subbed to aren't updating ): so yeah thanks for requesting at KMS & HMH Review Shop! Please remember to credit the shop in your foreword so that I can cancel your name off the request list, have a nice day (:

-Moon Hae