Chapter 5

Me: the kid with lung cancer

~~~~~baekhyun's past~~~~~

baekhyun's P.O.V


Hi, my name is byun baekhyun, 13 years old, But I'm not like any other 13 year olds, I'm different than most of them.You ask why?..... It's because I have cancer, and this is my cancer story.......






It was a cold day, kids are playing outside with their parents. I sat on our window, watching them. Honestly, I was waiting for my dad because I know that he bought me something on his way home, I like sweets, by the way.

when I heard our front door opening, I immediately ran towards it. I was greeted by my dad's warm smile, so I ran to him and hugged him, and like every other day, he bought me a pack of chocolates.

"you can only eat that after dinner, okay baekhyun?".

My dad ruffled my hair as I hugged the pack of chocolates. I went to see my mom cooking and I opened the fridge nd stored my sweets.

"hi honey~, go change upstairs and we'll have dinner"

Mom said before kissing my dad lovingly. As I look at them, I wondered, will I have someone too? I hope so, It's my birthday wish actually, since it's coming in a week.



A week before my birthday, I felt like I was having difficulty in breathing, like I'm drowning. I didn't mind it though, 'I'm just tired". that is what I always say to my parents when they ask me.

Four days before my birthday, I started coughing really hard, It hurts, but like always, I didn't mind it. I even went to school that day.

"hey baek, you look pale, are you okay?".

kyungsoo asked me and I just shrugged it offand we went to the class. Hours have passed and my lunhs feels like their burning, and I couldn't stop coughing, so the teacher told me to go to the nurse's office.

That day ended with me, being bombarded with questions from my parents, to which I said "I'm fine, just tired" and gave them a smile.

It's my birthday! yay!.....not. You see, this is the day that I learned something, and it's the fact that there is a huge chance, that when you get something that will make you happy, It will come with a price, and boy did it broke me.

I realized too that I'm gay, this guy, kris, asked me out. At first I thought he was joking, but when he knealt in frint of me, It made all my doubt vanish..... But I didn't say yes. I told him that we'll give it a try, but not date. I know I am weird and complicated, but hey, I'm a teenager.

It's ten pm and everyone is sayung their last happy birthday before exiting our house, kris smiled at me and I returned it.
My chest hurts, my throat hurts, I was coughing, It hurts. Everyone was gone and my parents are cleaning in the kitchen. I coughed and covered my mouth, only to feel something wet. When I looked at it, I screamed.

"I'M COUGHING BLOOD!".

panic rushed through me, I began hyperventilating, and that's when my paremts barged in and I out.


When I woke up, the lights stung my eyes, they're so bright.

"baekhyun honey, are you awake? can you here me?".

Mom asked, voice cracking because of crying. I nodded and she stood up from her seat and went to the side of my bed and held my left hand. From my right, my dad emerged and also held my right hand. They were both crying.

"what happened? why am I here?". I asked, but they kept crying and my dad pulled my mom into a hug whispering comforting words.

"I can't do it".

mom said in between sobs.

"Mom, dad, what's going on?". alarm bells were ringing inside my head.

"b-baekhyun son, you have...."

My dad started sobbing and it breaks my heart seeing him like this.

"honey—"

I turned to my mom and saw such sadness in her eyes.

"you have lung cancer".

she said before she broke down and started crying again.

I couldn't believe what I just heard, tears started falling from my eyes, So I turned my head to the left to hide it. I saw the clock placed on top of the bed side table, it read 11:59 pm.
Yes, Cancer is one of my birthday gifts.


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


It's been months since my cancer gracefuly entered my life, I became so thin, so pale, all in all, I look like . My parents gave me encouraging words, but it didn't work. I can see that they are tired, mostly because they have to go to work and take care of me at the same time.

"Baek honey, we have to buy your meds, your uncle will be staying here with you for awhile okay?".

My mom said as she took her and my dad's coat.

"But you two look tired, can't you just go tomorrow?"

I told them, and they just shook their heads before kissing my forehead.

I stopped attending class not only because I'm too weak, but also because of the bullying I received. this girl, jessica whisked kris away from me, leaving me completely alone since kyungsoo moved away. I didn't blame them, and I didn't mind the insults at first, but eventually, I gave up.

10 minutes passed and my uncle finally arrived. He hugged me and smiled at me warmly. before seating on the couch.

It's late but my parents are not home yet, My uncle and I played cards and talked for the whole evening, but my parents are still not home.

"why are they still out, uncle?". I asked, trying to shuffle the cards.

"maybe they got stuck in a traffic? It's almost christmas, people are doing late shopping".

I nodded and went back to shuffling the cards then my uncle's phone started to ring.

"hello?". he said .

his face bacame pale as snow and dropped his phone. I was a bit startled and scared because of my uncle's expression. He stood up abruptly and took the remote and clicked the televesion on.

"the accident in yongsan is now being investigated, and the two victims are brought to the nearest hospital."

two pictures appeared, one male, one female.

"this just in, the two victims, Identified as Mr. and Mrs. byun from The byun group of companies, were DOA"

the reporter said, and uncle shut the t.v off and hugged me tight. I was in so much shock that all I could do was cry and cry.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My Mom and Dad were cremated, and on that day, I didn't shed any tears because I don't want my family see me cry.
My other family members doesn't like me because I'm gay, so no one comforted me except my uncle. Kyungsoo called me and told me comforting words, but my heart didn't hear it, my heart started to be enveloped with bitterness, pain, and eventually, I became a cold person.

I moved in with my uncle 5 days before christmas, he was getting alot of calls from our relatives, inviting him to have christmas with them, but everytime uncle mentions my name, they start to argue, and I've had enough of it.

"uncle, it's okay, just go, I can stay here, I have my meds, I won't die.....yet and I believe they don't want a lung cancer on their house".

I said it with a straight face and coldness seeping from it.

"don't say that, you won't dieand If they don't want you, then I am not going".

my uncle said that with finality and I just gave him a curt nod.

Christmas came and me and my uncle sat in the living room, we decided to stay since no one wants me, and have a small dinner just for the two of us. I know It looks sad but to me, I felt happy that day, because eventhough there's just the two of us, it felt as if I have a huge circle of family and friends.


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was 17 years old when I was declared N.E.C, it made me happy, really, it felt like a huge burden was lifted from my back.
My uncle and I celebrated that day, and it was a very memorable day for me.

I've read about cancer patients who had a recurrence, and it scared me, what if my cancer comes back and finish me thos time? and that is when fear crept up on me, I fell into depression because I can't outrun my disease, those good and encouraging words were bull, I'm going to die.

My uncle noticed this and he kept asking me to go to this sharing group. At first I didn't like the idea because why would I want to share my story with a bunch of suicidal and depressed people?.

But eventually, I gave in, and there is where I met him, parl chanyeol, the derp who made me feel hot and cold at the same time, the person who made me feel SPECIAL.I'm afraid of confessing to him, I don't want to hurt him when I die. But this is good, being friends with him. and maybe, I'll let my guard down. just maybe.

my wish? it's simple really, but a bit corny.


and to whoever is out there,playing with our fate, I beg you,








please don't take chanyeol away from me.




————————————————————————————

a/n: done ^^ hope.you liked it. subscribe, vote ans leave a comment my lovelies. :D byee~