“Sleep well, strawberry.”

I’m definitely going insane. Was the kiss supposed to mean something or I’m just overlooking at things? I’m pretty sure it’s just a goodnight kiss or a consolation prize for making him happy tonight. I know Soohyun is such a busy man, he has tons of commitments, so even a day of relaxation would mean a lot to him. He only sees me as a younger sister after all, nothing more.

Last night, I spent hours of rolling on my bed, biting at my pillow and staring at the open air, thinking of what just happened. I don’t want to further expect but one message from Soohyun would clarify everything – including my feelings.

                                                                                                           ***

Today’s a Saturday. I’m usually a morning person but for some reasons, I decided to get up and wash around ten. I went downstairs for a late breakfast, making a side trip to the kitchen, and much to my surprise, I saw Myungsoo busy moving from one place to another with a pink floral apron on. I tried not to laugh at the sight, but I’ll admit, he looks cute with that one on. Another different side of Kim Myungsoo have been unleashed in front of me.

“Oh, good morning, Sue.” He greeted in a light voice, a much... friendlier tone. What’s up with the sudden mood change? I’m really starting to believe now that he has a split personality disorder.

I headed to the refrigerator for some glass of water, still dazed with his weird self. “Uhm, morning.”

“You want to join me for breakfast? I’m almost done with the toast.” I nearly spit out the water inside my mouth as I heard his invitation. This is starting to make me nervous. Someone bring the old Myungsoo back, I think he’s been cursed- or possessed.

I watched him head to the dining table carrying the plate of French toast (oh my, he knows how to make French toast), his face glowing a shade of satisfaction. I blinked twice as he waved a hand at me, “Sue, come on.”

My mouth fell as I sat. A typical American type of breakfast served right in front of me, complete with pancake stacks with whipped cream and strawberries and sausages. I only stopped putting food in my plate when Myungsoo threw a meaningful glance at my direction and lightly smiled. I still had bacon stuffed in my mouth.

“Do you like it?” He asked, taking a sip from his own glass of orange juice. He tried to keep his cool even when his lips are trying to fight off a laugh.

I narrowed my eyes at him and swallowed, “You know how to cook?!”

Myungsoo started laughing with that and nodded, patting his chest like a proud male alpha beast in the forest, “Kim Myungsoo’s a perfect man, I can do anything.”

I can’t help but smile and just continue with my breakfast.

                                                                                                              ***

I was in the middle of drawing a portrait requested by Jiyeon when I heard a knock on my door, I looked up to see Myungsoo already coming in, again, even without my permission. I let that pass since he made a sumptuous breakfast and shared it with me anyway.

“Busy?” He asked, sitting on the edge of my bed.

I turned back my attention to the sketch pad and continued shading the lower parts of the portrait, “Not really. You need something?”

I felt him peer over my shoulder which I found really disturbing since he’s too close and I was never comfortable with that proximity among guys. Myungsoo only watched as my hand moved slowly across the paper, finishing the final touches.

“Will you go out with me?”

It felt like a cold bucket of ice water had been poured over me and I did my best to back away from him. I gripped the pencil tight and pointed it at his direction as I turned to look back at him, sitting at the farthest part of the bed. “Are you a doppelganger? Where did you hide the real Myungsoo?”

He stared at me, obviously shocked, before exploding in bucketfuls of laughter. Myungsoo might have found it really funny because he ended up lying on his back with his hand clutching his stomach.

“What’s so funny?” I can’t help but ask.

He snorted twice, “You. Y-You’re funny.” I scoffed back at him.

His chuckles slowly faded but he didn’t get up and just turned to me. Myungsoo’s huge dark almond eyes turned into small crescents as he gave me a warm and genuine smile. All of a sudden, I froze in my position, not able to comment on his foreign and too-impossible-to-believe kind acts.

“You know you’re kind of cute.”

I flushed red at his comment. Did he just call me ‘cute’?

Myungsoo rose from the bed and straightened out his shirt. I stayed still and didn’t move, watching him move towards the door before he stopped in front of me and pinched my nose.

“Hey!” I grunted and defensively covered my face.

He chuckled to himself, “I need to buy new clothes. Dress up, I’ll wait for you downstairs. Don’t make me wait too long.”

With that, he left me, dumb-stricken and confused. What’s that jerk up to? And who said I want to go with him to buy new clothes? I’m not his maid nor are we friends, duh.

I let out a huge sigh. It was relieving to hear that that was what he meant by going out. Literally. I mean, I’m not saying that I’d wish he’ll ask me out, I’ll never want that to happen for heaven’s sake anyway.

Since there’s really nothing to do today, I think it will be fine to accompany him. Besides, I’m still a bit worried about Myungsoo. Maybe he’s sick or cursed, I’m not sure which, probably her ex-girls cursed him for being a player. He’s been acting extremely strange this morning and as a person who knew him since we were seven, I’ve never seen him act this way towards me. Never.

*** 

“Do you think this one’s better? Or this one?” Myungsoo held up two collared shirts in front of me, the one’s black, the other’s a maroon.

I don’t actually know how to answer him since I haven’t accompanied any guy to buy clothes in my entire lifetime, not even my own father. So imagine my face when he asked me such a hard question.

Soohyun wears a lot of different clothes that I secretly check when I have the time in the internet. Perhaps what I think suits him will suit Myungsoo too, they’re brothers after all with almost the same height and built.

I pointed at the maroon one, “That one would do.” I saw Soohyun once wear a maroon long-sleeved sweater and it looked really nice on him.

Myungsoo’s eyes shifted from one shirt to another. “You think so? Black suits me really well, by the way.”

“Who told you that?”

He snickered at me, “A lot of people.”

I rolled my eyes at him and looked around for a bench to seat in. I found one in front of the dressing room.

“Fine, I’ll try this one on too,” he gestured to the saleslady and she led him inside the dressing room together with the other clothes he picked earlier.

The other employees inside the boutique started whispering and exchanging meaningful glances with each other. I started to feel anxious.

Apparently, their whispers were also meant for me to hear.

“Do you think they’re a couple?” The short-haired one asked.

The one with dyed red hair shook her head, “I don’t think so. Maybe they’re cousins or something like that. He’s too hot for her.”

She nodded in agreement, “Looks like it. Hot guys like him won’t date someone who looks boring as her. She can even pass as a nun.”

I ignored them, like what I always do. They’re right, anyway. Besides, I didn’t want us to appear like a couple in the first place.

They only stopped staring when Myungsoo came out and handed all the clothes to the woman who assisted her, and when I said all, I mean ten tops. This is the first boutique we walked in, shouldn’t he be checking out the others to see if they have better pieces?

“I’ll take all of them,” he mouthed before looking at me. He raised a hand and motioned for me to come forward. I got confused but I had no choice but to follow.

When I was close enough, Myungsoo placed an arm around my shoulder and held me close. I wanted to shove his arm away but he whispered a “stay still” behind my ear and that made me totally blank.

He let go of me when he reached out to his wallet and pulled some thick amount of bill that I couldn’t count, then held me close again.

I can clearly see the frowns and raising eyebrows of the two employees earlier. The intensity of their glares was too much I can feel it right through my skin.

Myungsoo turned to me. “Babe, where do you want to eat?”

Babe? I stared at him in disbelief. I can’t even find the words to answer him back.

He chuckled and lightly pinched my cheek. “Why are you so cute? Okay, fine, you win. We’ll have your favorite after this.”

What the hell is Myungsoo doing and why am I not hitting his face yet? I actually don’t know but he owes me one big explanation after this little stunt he’s pulling up.

When the cashier was finished, he casually took all the paper bags in his one hand and grabbed my hand with his free one. I struggled to free myself and hit him in the arm when we were out of the shop.

“What were you doing back there?” I glared at him.

Myungsoo rubbed the arm I hit and laughed. “Why are you so mad? I even helped you.”

I scoffed, “What help do I need?”

He stopped and stared intently at me. There it was again, his huge almond eyes with dark orbs. So scary. “Don’t let yourself be a laughing stock, Sue. If you need to use me just like what happened earlier, do so. I know you’re better than that.”

Myungsoo turned his back to me and my eyes fell on the floor. Using anyone for your own sake is not good but when he told me that, why did I feel like perhaps, it is?

***

We did not stay long in the shopping mall, though Myungsoo did treat me to a huge ice cream chocolate sorbet, which I had a hard time finishing until he eventually helped me. Then after, we visited a music shop and I learned that he plays the guitar, so I wasn’t having hallucinations when I hear a guitar strumming from his room past midnight a few times. He played the chorus of an old rock song (which is the only rock song I know) using a black electric guitar and I just noticed how calloused his hands were, but he’s really good at it which is nice because finally it seems like he has a talent, after all.

I wanted to play some basketball especially when he said he’s the best basketball player during high school and I wanted to beat the air out of his head because he’s so arrogant but unfortunately, the rain started to pour really hard and we didn’t bring any umbrella with us. By the time we reached his car, we were already soaking wet so he suggested that we just enjoy the rain. This is practically my first time playing in the rain. I decided to bring him to the playground I always visit, this time not to cry and sulk on my own.

I realized that maybe he’s just misunderstood by his parents, by people, including me. I mean, the look on his face when he started to move the swing was so priceless I can’t even imagine he’d been branded as a rebel.

“Sue!” he called out loud, the heavy rain’s beating our voices I barely hear anything.

I turned to him and saw his lips moved but I can’t make out the words he’s trying to say. “What did you say?”

He said it again but I really can’t hear him.

“I can’t hear you!” I yelled back but I only got a smile in return.

We both lost track of the time but when we decided to head back to his car, the sky was already dark. Myungsoo his heater and gave me a towel while he shook of the excess water in his hair.

“Do you think we’re going to get sick?” He asked.

I dried the tops of my hair and stifled a sneeze. “I’m not sure about you but my immune system is really weak so maybe a ninety-five percent on my side.”

Myungsoo clicked his tongue. “Aish, you should’ve told me earlier. Your mom will get mad at me.”

I grinned and waved a hand. “It’s fine. This always happens to me.”

***

I stood by the balcony, watching the darkness swallow the place outside, the rain tinkered against the part of the area exposed to the sky. The wind carried a chilly breeze but I didn’t budge. It played with my almost dried hair and lightly kissed my cheeks. I didn’t know the cold could be that relaxing.

I heard someone clear his throat and saw a grinning Myungsoo beside me when I turned around, “Oh, you’re still awake.”

He nodded and looked ahead, “Yeah. Can’t sleep, you too?” I think he had alcohol because I smelled it when the wind blew past us again.

“Mhm.” I rubbed my arms with my hands to generate heat.

“Are you and Soohyun hyung dating?” I got surprised with his sudden question and leaned beside the door sill. He look like he’s quite tipsy but he normally asks questions like that out of the blue.

I shook my head and laughed, “Soohyun oppa only sees me as a sister and nothing else.” A tinge of pain pierced through my chest. I’m here now, admitting the reality to the brother of the only person I like. Well, truth hurts basically all the time.

Myungsoo sighed, “I hope so.” I almost scoffed at his reply, just like what I expected, but his tone sounded like he’s really sad about it too. I wondered if it’s because he’s already sober or what.

I didn’t respond but when I turned to my right to look at him, he already had his drowsy eyes fixated on me. Why do I always have to stiffen when he stares at me like that?

“I hope that he does because……… I like you.” My breathing hitched to a stop but my heart started thumping really loud and fast. Whatever happens to Kim Myungsoo when he’s drunk doesn’t look good at all.

“I like you very much, Bae Suzy.”