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Story Link

Granted By: ShineBFIsland501

Title: My Son is An Idol

Author: NamWoohyun-Sarang

Title

Honestly speaking, I don’t find these kinds of titles intriguing at all. A lot of stories have similar titles, so I don’t think it’s very creative. The title obviously fits with the story because the point of this story is that Infinite’s life after the disbandment was unknown and their children emerge after a few years.

Foreword/Description

The description is very short and the foreword is non-exsistent. The description is very straight forward and makes readers a bit interested to see what impact Kyle and Woosoon will have towards the industry and their family after being idols. But, to make the description and foreword longer and more interesting, I suggest adding statements, asking the readers a few questions and maybe even quoting a part of the or something like that.

Appearance

The poster wasn’t done well, no offense, and I think that it is too simple. Also, there are too many characters in my opinion and you don’t have to include the whole Nam family; just adding the members of ICEE from the Nam family would have been okay. And, their faces aren’t clear and starring is spelled wrong. Also, some of the fonts are too small and the format is a little unappealing and confusing, so I suggest pressing the enter button twice when starting a new paragraph or dialogue.

Plot

The first chapter was quite rambly and by reading it, I couldn't figure out the main point or conflict of the story. The chapter, in my opinion, didn't have anything special. Every chapter from then on were mostly boring and most of the events were pointless in my opinion. ICEE playing games and fighting were useless and I would liked to have seen more important events; an intriguing scene in each chapter. But, I greatly enjoyed the flashback that showed how Infinite disbanded and how Sunggyu and Woohyun adopted Kyle and Woosoon. Those, in my opinion, were the best scenes in the story. Also, I liked how there was a balance between Infinite and ICEE's groups and I didn't get tired of reading about them.

Grammar

Your English is very good. The punctuations were in the right places ,the tenses were correct and the sentences for the most part were well constructed. I didn't see any repetitive or major mistakes. You are also very good at writing dialogues which you use to your advantage, but I would've liked to have seen more paragraphs instead of having an overflow of dialogues. Another thing that I would like to see change is the capitalization. I understand that you want to emphasize some words, but by capitalizing them, you seem like an amateur. Throughout the whole story, I've only seen around five mistakes which makes me very impressed. Here are just a few mistakes:

Incorrect:They were so exotic to finally get to see their family.

Correct:They were so excited to finally get to see their family.

Incorrect:Did you guys here of the new boy group, ICEE?”

Correct:Did you guys hear of the new boy group, ICEE?”

Incorrect:“So,” Woosoon said, shrugging his shoulders.

Correct:“So?” Woosoon said, shrugging his shoulders.

Flow

The flow for the most part was slow, in my opinion or I guess it didn't have a very smooth transition for the chapters.

Characterization

By reading the characters’ profiles, it is clear to me that the story will be confusing because adding too many characters is hard, especially if half of them are OCs. But, I must commend you for making the characters all different and it is obvious that you worked hard to think of them. It was just a little confusing as to who was who and who was Infinite's family members. Otherwise, I loved how the feelings and emotions of the characters were conveyed and it was easy to see what they were like.

Comments/Enjoyment

I very much enjoyed the story even though it might seem as though I said a lot of negative things.

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