tao never give explanations. the only words that leave his lips are the once kyungsoo cant understand.

kyungsoo wonders why he grasps onto the little shreds of tao that he gets; theyre barely enough to keep him alive.

its all games and chances taken to no avail. its useless.

but kyungsoo cant help but wait.

there are days when he wakes that cold clings to his bones, forces him down so he cant move. these are the days when despair claws at his heart and doubt becomes his best friend.

doubt is easy to deal with when theres nothing else there to keep him company.

among other things, tao is genius at delivering doubt to him on a silver platter, serving it up all nice until kyungsoo is blinded by a fantasy.

fantasies are flimsy things that break when he touches them. they tear under the sof ttouch of his shivering fingers.  its when they break that the truth comes crashing in.

kyungsoo is dying, and tao, unreliable as he is, is the only thing keeping him from slipping off the edge of the world.

its a long way down.

its amazing that kyungsoo even cares, when every foreign word to leave taos lips makes his brain reel. chinese isnt his thing, but tao is and they conflict in his mind until his head hurts and all he feels is frustration.

but tao never sees because he leaves before kyungsoo breaks.

kyungsoo shouldnt expect a spirit to stay long, but his heart always wants it.

tao is supposed to have other things to do, and he always seems to. he comes fluttering by to complain in words kyungsoo doesnt know but loves anyway.

and then hes gone again, and kyungsoo clutches blindly at taos coattails, pulling him back.

but tao doesnt exist, at least not physically, and kyungsoos fingers meet the harsh cling of the air instead.

kyungsoo wastes away at home. he dies a little quicker with every minute spent on his couch.

he waits for days.

tao doesnt come.

A/N: I dont even know im sorry this is me trying to make some sort of artistic bull and its barely 1000 characters like what