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Kjhris

Sujukat

Mybutterflyhigh

Arba_TOP

Roxijojo

TabiSan4eva

A warning sign
I missed the good part, then I realized
I started looking and the bubble burst
I started looking for excuses 
Come on in
I've gotta tell you what a state I'm in
I've gotta tell you in my loudest tones
That I started looking for a warning sign

When the truth is, I miss you
Yeah the truth is, that I miss you so

A warning sign
It came back to haunt me, and I realized
That you were an island and I passed you by
And you were an island to discover

Come on in
I've gotta tell you what a state I'm in
I've gotta tell you in my loudest tones
That I started looking for a warning sign

When the truth is, I miss you
Yeah the truth is, that I miss you so
And I'm tired, I should not have let you go

Warning Sign - Coldplay

The welcome party for Dara was a success and the night went smoothly well. All of them got home with a satisfied smile on their faces except for the four boys namely GD, Taeyang, Daesung and TOP. Still bothered with what they’ve seen when they try to snoop around on Dara. Their plan of swooping Dara’s feet (except for Top), backfired onto them ten times fold and they thought Karma is digital these days. Seungri, well of course, being himself he is the only one who got a weird smile on his face that they all don’t want to know what kind of out-of-this-world is he thinking again.

They all went back to their dorm that no one dares to speak. They just went inside their rooms that nobody bothered to say goodnight with each other like they are all occupied with something more important.

Top got into his room immediately and went straight to bed like all his energy has been drained. He keeps on replaying the scene where Dara was kissing Amber. Yeah it was hot, as much as he hates to admit what just Seungri told them, I think he agrees with him a little that girl to girl action is totally mind blowing. It’s his first time to see a live action in front of him but now he’s contemplating things on his head.

Why does he feel a little hurt? Or even, why the heck it bothers him that much that Dara and Amber has a relationship? Why does every time he looks into Dara’s eyes she’s reading every bit of him like his poker face will never work on her. His heartbeat was now in a double speed like it’s having a race inside his chest and it creeps him out totally.

“I’m not in love right?” Top asked himself like there’s another person inside the room.

“Is this the feeling when you’re in love? You’ll feel everything. Like you’re aware with everything that she does even you don’t want to. Your heart beats so fast when she looks at you, eye to eye. Hurting, if she’s with someone else, jealousy and many more that I don’t want know.” He feels very vulnerable and confused. He has never felt this way before in his entire life and that is why it frustrates him even more to be in this state. He doesn’t know the answer and he don’t know whom to ask, Top is so frustrated and disappointed with himself at the same time cause he still can’t come up with an answer.

He sat up from his bed and took his phone on the bedside table. He browsed his contact numbers trying to pick who’s the best person to ask to with his pathetic problem. A person that will never ask and judge him with his ridiculous thoughts right now. That is why he never thought of asking GD about what’s bothering him because he knows he’ll just load him with tons of question after and he’ll just ends up being teased by him probably worst case scenario is black mailing him afterwards. So he decided not to tell anyone in his group because he knows what capable of their big mouth can do.

He now stopped at a certain contact number before he decides to press the call button.

“Aisssssshhh!!! Just pressed the Godd*mn button,” Top told to himself as he frustratedly dialed the number wishing that he did the right thing. The phone starts to ring twice and he thought maybe the one his calling is busy or something. When he was about to end the call the other party answered it.

“Hello????...  Hyung?…. Is that you?” The other person asked him.

“Yeah dude…. How are you? Are you busy?” Top asked him hoping that he is not actually busy.

“No! Not all. I just got home from a photo shoot and a go-see, you know… modeling stuff. Why hyung did you miss me? Hehe..” The latter ask him.

“No, but I just want to ask you something, but promise me you won’t tell this to Jiyong that I ask you this knowing him he likes to black mail me whenever he gets any opportunity,” Top asked him with a hint of threat with his voice.

“Okay, don’t worry hyung I’ll swear in my grandparent’s grave that I won’t tell him even if he asks me to. So what is it? I’m really intrigued? What is the great T.O.P has to ask me and even bothered to call me overseas. I think I have an idea is this about a girl?” he asked Top straight to the point.

“A little… but here it goes. There is this guy his kind a confused with his own feelings about this woman he just met her two days ago and now it frustrates him why he can’t get her out of his head. Everything about her is being magnified, so I don’t think it’s normal to say he is in love to her with that short span of time right? It’s been only two days for Christ sake and there not even close with each other yet. But he finds her very interesting then tonight happened he found out that she’s a biual and she has a girlfriend.” He said without pausing to catch his breath and continue.

“Now the guy is much more frustrated with the turn of events, like his disappointed that she’s in another relationship and a hint of jealousy I guess his jealous because he never got to meet her personally. Now he found out that maybe she’s not interested in men cause she saw her kissing a woman although it’s not a big deal to him and it’s definitely hot but still it’s not him who is she kissing. He knows he doesn’t have any right with her so what he should do? And why is he feeling this way?” Top asked him sounding frustrated with his own story.

“You see hyung my first advice that I can give you is to drop the act about this third person thing we both know you’re just fooling with yourself. It’s so obvious that we are talking about your feelings with that woman, so cut the bull crap” Soo-hyuk told him.

“Am I that obvious?” Top asked him like he never thought that he was so obvious with all this talking.

“Aaaaaahhhhh!!!! Yes hyung! You are very obvious with the way you deliver your questions.” Soo-hyuk wants to roll his eyes onto Top though it would have been like a girly thing to do. “Just admit it to yourself that you have feelings towards this girl. Yes, you heard me right you have feelings for her. Is she really that hot and she melted you façade attitude with women especially the famous I don’t care look?” He asked Top teasingly.

“Well…… maybe…… a little….. I guess” Top answered him like he doesn’t know the answer.

“I bet she is so hot because I never heard you being uncertain with things before and you also told me you saw her kissing another girl? That would be interesting she must be very beautiful to capture all hearts in different gender” Soo-hyuk tries to tease Top a little bit. “Although you said you only met her two days ago still you can’t deny and try lie to yourself that you’re not attached with her in every way. Have you ever heard the thing called love at first sight hyung?” he asked Top.

“I did but I don’t believe in it” Top answered like he’s so sure of it.

“Well believe now hyung cause that’s what hit you, it’s the most traitor feeling you can have because you’ll never know when it hit you. It will never tell you that there is a warning sign that you’ll be in this mess for good, you’ll be vulnerable in many things that you still want to know everything about her but afraid to know the answer in the end. You will feel jealous with everyone who tries to capture her attention especially now you know she’s in a relationship with someone else all you can do is wait for them to break up so you can have your moves onto her.” Soo-hyuk continues.

“You see hyung. I’ve been with this kind of love at first sight before, we end up dating and I’m happy about that. But as the relationship progresses we got lost in it. We thought it would be forever and the last thing I know we separate ways because we have different goals in life. I hate things how it all turns out. I regret it every day of my life that I just let her go like that easily without a fight. We have different dreams in life then. I was about to propose to her before we enter college. When she said that she is not coming with me in Paris and she doesn’t want to hold me back just because of our relationship so we decided to let go of each other and just separate our ways.” Soo-hyuk said.

“(His voice is obviously sad in the story he’s telling.)” Top noticed.

“But now when I think of it I was a fool of letting her go she was my love at first sight. My first ever true love, my first heartbreak, and the only woman that I can love whole-heartedly with my own life. I say these things to you, hyung, because I don’t want you to end up being hurt with this sudden turn of events in your life and regret it later on. Just take it slow no one is going to judge you just because you can’t decide immediately. Sort all things especially your feelings first before you make any decision. Ask yourself is that what you really want in your life?” Soo-hyuk tries to enlighten Top’s mind by putting his self as an example.

“Mmmm….. You have a point there. I’ll take your advice, Soo-hyuk. Thank you dude! I know I can count on you when it comes with these cheesy things” Top a little “By the way, I never knew that you had this history with a certain girl who is she anyways? I want to meet her; First woman who broke the playboy heart of yours” Top tries to pry some answers from Soo-hyuk.

“I don’t think you know her hyung we’re just high school when we had a relationship. My family still lives in New York then before they all decided to just return to Korea and live there permanently. Me on the other hand went to Paris to pursue my modeling career so because of my selfish dream we did separate our ways before we entered in college, from what I’ve heard all I know is she’s now a successful fashion designer” Soo-hyuk tries to reminisce his past with her.

“So what is her name?” Top still can’t let go with the topic and also intrigued by this fact.

“Sandara….. Her name is Sandara she’s also a Korean but her name is very unique for a Korean name right?” Soo-hyuk said while chuckling a little bit.

“Yeah weird name for a Korean indeed, when I find her I’ll tell her to get back at you so you’ll stop breaking all the girls heart and finally be in a long term relationship” Top said to lighten up the mood cause he notice Soo-hyuk’s voice that he still has feelings for this certain girl.

“Don’t you worry hyung I’m a good boy now and if you indeed find her bring her back to me A.S.A.P.” Soo-hyuk said and they both laugh at this.

“When are you coming back here in Korea?” Top suddenly ask.

“In two days. I’ll be coming back I wanted all to surprise you but since you asked, actually I just did booked a flight yesterday so I’ll see you soon just don’t mention it to GD yet. You know him he won’t stop bugging me to a have a night out with you guys if he knows I’ll be coming home. I just need to visit my parents first then I’ll just pop into your YG dorm without a notice.” Soo-hyuk said to Top.

“Okay see you soon, thanks for the time dude now I can sleep soundly I guess…” Top said and with that they ended the call.

Top tries to relax his nerves this time he know he doesn’t have to rush this thing like what Soo-hyuk advice him to do. So he’ll just go with the flow for now, he tries to rest his head and stop himself from over thinking too much.

On the hand Dara and Amber were driving home to Amber’s apartment. Dara tries to speak first while bowing her head. “I’m sorry what happened out there at the party I’m just being repulsive to things especially when I’m angry you know. I just over heard in the men’s room what the Bigbang boys are betting on me that they are planning who will be the one of them will swept me off my feet. So I just want to give them a lesson that they’ll never forget. I’m sorry I dragged you into this mess but I promise it won’t happen again,” Dara raising her hand to make swearing pose.

“I’m not mad at you I’m just tired with all the work that I’ve been doing in the past few weeks,” Amber tries to assure Dara that she's not mad although she’s disappointed because Dara kissed her with the only intentions of having a payback time with the Bigbang boys.

“You’re not mad really? As in you’re not really mad with what I did do to you in the hallway? Maybe I should kiss you then often, your lips are so tender anyway” Dara back to her old playful self again.

“Well that would be rewarding,” Amber said and they both laugh at this. “Are you not interested with any of the Bigbang boys?” Amber asked Dara.

“Well there is this one, the guy with the platinum blonde hair but it turns out his a douche bag also like most of the men so why bother it’s just a waste of time” Dara told her.

“Have I told you why I like these blue roses?” Dara asked Amber while she’s looking at the beautiful flowers.

“Well all I know is you never liked flowers and this is the only color of roses that you like. I remember you always have this flower on your vase in your working table in Parson’s” Amber answered her.

“That’s true I never like flowers not even a bit but there is this certain person who likes to give me one” Dara now tries to reminisce her story.

When I was still in high school someone always puts a blue rose inside my locker every day. So one day my curiosity ate me and I decided to come early at school so I can see who is this sneaky person who always puts a blue rose inside my locker. That’s when I saw him, a very tall, slender body and chinky expressive eyes. He was so shock to see me that early and caught him putting the blue rose inside my locker that he can’t even utter a word. So I just casually asked him “So you’re the sneaky guy who always put a blue a rose inside my locker” he didn’t answer. “Why pick the color blue when there are tons of color of roses out there” she asked him but still he is not talking. “Hello earth calling, a very long distance outer space call is very expensive so can you just please drop by here on earth so I won’t look like a lunatic talking all by myself” Dara gesturing a fake call on her hand but still looking at him intently.

“I picked the royal blue color cause for me it symbolizes your royal beauty and I think it’s unique like you” he now found his tongue and courage to speak.

“Oooohhhhh!!!... now you’re talking... I never thought that my secret flower sender is very poetic” Dara tries to make fun of him a little because of his answer. “So where did you get this flowers? Do you have a flower farm or something” Dara ask him.

“We have our own flower shop it’s my mother’s habit and eventually it turns into a family business.” he tries to share his story without sounding awkward.

“Do you know I’m not that fond of flowers?” Dara ask him.

“I know…. that is why I’m sending you this kind of flower so even you’re not a fan of flowers still you can like one even just one, because I see this flower in you a very unique but well rounded type of person. Cold looking and very beautiful” He said to her eye to eye.

“Is that so?.... Thank you for the compliment with that I might like this flower from now on” Dara said to him. “By the way what is your name? I’m Sandara and you are?” She ask him while gesturing for a hand shake.

“Soo-hyuk, Lee Soo-hyuk”

“From that day on we became friends and eventually high school lovers for almost four years but eventually we did separate our ways because we have different dreams in life.” Dara told Amber.

“I don’t want him to hold back with his dreams so I told him he can go study and pursue his dreams in Paris without me. So I let him go and stayed in New York so I can pursue my studies in Parson’s. Until today I ask myself did I made the right decision of letting him go that easily? Maybe that is why I can’t be in a long term relationship after that cause maybe just maybe on the back of my mind I’m still hoping that we’ll still get back together and patch things up where we’ve left it before. I know it sounds ridiculous and I know it’s just a thought for me. But I don’t have any bad memories with that person so I never notice that I always keep comparing him with other men” Dara said and laying all her cards in front of Ambers.

“Wow this is the first time that I told someone about him even my family didn’t know what really happened to us I just told them that were over period and I’m thankful that they didn’t ask anymore after that” Dara said to Amber.

Amber just went quiet with Dara’s confession to her. She regrets a little why she even bought those stupid flowers. Her hold on the stirring wheel tighten she can’t help but feel pity to herself cause she knows between her and Dara she has this one sided feelings towards her. But she knows she have to admit to her sooner or later what she feels about her cause she wants to be honest with herself and be free with this secret for too long.