"Sometimes I love the shining star

Sometimes I hate the shining star"

- AdultChild "Star"

AUTHORS POV

   After running all the way from the mall Soohyun is at the gate of the dorm. Dripping with sweat and panting for air he tries to punch in the password. He messes up a few times untill finally getting it right. His mind is a mess that he'd forgotten all about sasaeng fans and other people that could have been watching him. He stops inside his gate and falls to his knees from exhaustion. He stares for a while at the delicate bag that is now crumpled and becomes sad thinking that the gift that was going to change his life is now a crumpled mess like himself.

SOOHYUNS POV

    I gain some sense of reality back and realize I'm not alone. I look up and see the guilty face of Kevin. "Hyung." He says so quietly as he's hesitating to approach me. "Hyung...I-I was so curious...I...I wasn't thinking." He stumbles on his words. I can tell how bad he feels but with all my emotions that I'm feeling right now I can't quite forgive him. "It doesn't matter now. He probably hates me and even if I can clear up this misunderstanding it still doesn't take away the pain and tears he's already felt and cried.

   I hear Kevin sniffling and try not to look at him. I know if I do I will instantly forgive him. "I know, mianhe hyung." He sobs out. I give in and look at him. Getting up from my knees I walk over to him and pull him into a hug. "Why can't I stay mad at you...or any of you guys?" I say to him. "Because we are your family." He says without any hint of sarcasm. I smile at that and agree with him. "Kevin-ah wheres Dongho?" I ask remembering why we were here. "He's with kiseop." Damn! I know that it will be hell trying to convince Kiseop to leave me alone with him.

   "I wouldn't worry too much about Kiseop, it's Dongho that you should be worried about. I don't think I've ever seen him mad before." Kevin warns me. "Mad?" I ask. "Yeah you thought being slapped was bad? The pillow and blankets you two shared, he destroyed and threw them away saying he refused to even smell you. Now he's back in our room using his summer bedding." I gulp at the image of a very angry Dongho. "What do I do now?" I practically plead to kevin.

   He shakes his head at me and raises his hands up as if in defeat. "I don't know hyung. I don't have that kind of knowledge I never had a boyfriend." He sort of laughs at what he says. I look at him as if saying this isn't the time for joking and he gets the hint. I rub my free hand through my hair and stare back at the bag. I knew I wasn't going to get Dongho to listen to me but maybe if I catch him off guard...maybe this plan might just work. 

   This wasn't what I had planned but it was all I had now. It was either this or have Dongho possibly stop talking to me forever. "I'm going." I tell Kevin and he puts a reassuring hand on my shoulder. He just smiles at me not saying anything and I walk into the dorm. It's surprisingly quiet where is everyone? Just then I see Hoon, he notices me and shakes his head at me. "Way to go hyung, it's so awkward in the dorm that no one wants to come out of their rooms.Fix this!" He says to me. "Mianhe." I say and he responds, "I'm not Dongho go apologize to him." He starts shooing me in the direction of his room.

DONGHOS POV

   My fits of anger finally calm down and now that I'm sore and tired I just want to cry. I feel awkward putting Kiseop hyung in this positition but he insists on staying and comforting me. It does make me feel better to have him here but I can't help but secretly wish that Soohyun would come through the door, hold onto me and kiss me hard while telling me I was wrong. No matter the situation I always want him to come back to me. I want to hate him but all I can do is crave his love when he's not with me.

   I begin to miss his smell and mentally yell at myself for doing what I did. "Dongho-yah I'm going to go down stairs for a while I'll be back ok?" I nod at him and roll over. I close my eyes but the only thing I can see is Soohyun and that noona. I wondered if he managed to give her that gift. My stomach knots at the thought of that and I open my eyes quickly. If I close them again I will only be hurting myself more. I hate you hyung...I love you hyung...I repeat to myself over and over.

   The door creaks open and I raise up to greet Kiseop hyung. Only it isn't Kiseop hyung. It's my Soohyun. I shake my head. No Dongho you have to stay strong don't give into him so easily. I look at him with the best angry face I can conjure and begin to tell him off but he stops me before I can even get started. He tosses the gift bag on my bed. I'm confused at first but then I realize....was this meant for me? I'm so stupid. "Dongho." He says getting my attention, "When you can figure out what those mean, when you can learn to trust in me, only then should you come to me." He says to me and walks out the door.

   I look at the bag as if it's something foreign of this world afraid to touch it. Mostly in fear of what's inside the bag. I sit up and pull my knees into my chest and stare at it for a long while. Both Kiseop and Kevin hyung come back. Kevin is the first to say something, "So the bag was meant for you after all." He says. I nod at him. "Have you looked to see what's inside?" I shake my head no. "Why not?" kiseop asks. "I'm scared that I've made a big mistake and ruined something special for Soohyun." Tears threaten my eyes again as I explain to my hyungs.

   Kevin hyung walks over to it and peaks into the bag. "Oh." He says looking at me and then to Kiseop. I don't know what he whispers but kiseop hyungs face becomes shocked his eyes are wide and his mouth forms into the shape of an O. "What is it?" I ask stupidly. "I think it's something you have to look at for yourself." He says to me and pulls Kiseop out of the room with him. I can hear Kiseop hyung protesting, "I want to know too!" He whines to Kevin hyung. "Not now Kiseop-ah." I no longer hear them anymore and I pick up the bag. I look inside and my heart flutters. It's a square box the sight of it makes my eyes sting with tears.

   I pull it out and and inside are two beautiful silver bands. One says my name and the other Soohyun. I wiped the tears away that had fallen. I pick up the ring that says my name on it and notice theres something inscribed on the inside of it. It's a date but not just any date, it's the date of the night that I kissed him at the club. The night that I realized that I had feelings for Soohyun. I put the ring back and pick up the ring with his name on it. The date on this one was dated a few years ago...coincidently the year U-KISS formed. I hold onto it and think for a long time. Why can't I recognize this date and what does it even mean?

   I repeat the date in my head trying to search through my memories. And it comes to me finally it was the date that we were introduced. I couldn't believe that he remembered such a thing. I try to understand what these meant. I shake my head at the realization. If the date on the "Dongho" ring is the date that I realized I had feelings for him then does this date mean that is when Soohyun began harbouring feelings for me?

  That couldn't be possible! I was just a kid to him then just a dongsaeng. I slide the ring on my finger and coincidently it fits perfectly, this one must have been meant for me. I lay back down overcome with emotions and exhaustion. I clutch onto the ring with my other hand as well hloding it close to my heart and close my eyes.

SOOHYUNS POV

   It's already late at night and I realize Dongho wasn't coming back to me tonight. I wondered if he had a hard time figuring out what the rings meant or if he just wasn't ready to trust me or continue this relationship. I wondered if those rings were a bad idea. If I hadn't got them I wouldn't have needed to go to the mall and I wouldn't have agreed to meet my mother and there wouldn't have been a misunderstanding. Dongho would be laying with me right now. We would be happy instead.

  I was thankful that nobody crowded me with questions instead they left me alone and gave me my much needed space. The minutes ticked by and finally there was a knock at the door. I jumped up quickly fixing myself. "Hey hyung dinner is in the fridge." It was just AJ. I had got my hopes up thinking it was Dongho. He went to shut the door but I stopped him, "Have you talked to Dongho?" I asked sounding desperate. "No he hasn't come out of his room." He says. "Has he at least ate?" I was worried about him. "I don't know Kiseop took his food to him. You'd have to ask him or Kevin." I shook my head in acknowledgement and he left.