Chapter 1: Insomnia

 

Sooyoung laid in her bed wide awake. She stared at the shining stars in the ceiling. It was 04:00AM and all she could hear was Taeyeon who was sleeptalking again. Their leader had a habit of talking in her sleep and lately Sooyoung had paid more attention to it. It wasn't because she wanted to stay awake listening to her unnie talking this and that while sleeping, but because she didn't have enything else to do. For several weeks Sooyoung had had trouble with sleeping. With her busy schedule she didn't have enough time to sleep anyway and now, struggling to sleep every night, she was exhausted. It all began, when she had drama filming for two days in a row without any sleep. After that she dragged herself to bed, dead tired, but she couldn't sleep at all. She was so tired that she didn't feel tired anymore.

After that everything had gone worse. She couldn't fall asleep and she rarely got more than 3 hours of sleep a day. Every day she felt exhausted but when she got to bed she was wide awake, again. Sighing at the realization of another sleepless night Sooyoung got up and tiptoed out of the room, careful not to wake Taeyeon, who was mumbling something about gingerbread cookies, and Yoona, who was sleeping peacefully in her bed covered with soft fluffy blanket Sunny had given her last Christmas. Sooyoung silently close the door of their room and went to kitchen. She made herself hot chocolate with a lot of sugar and went to living room.

During nights when she couldn't sleep, she used to sit on windowsill and stare down to the lively city. It was dark night but the movements of the lights made the city look alive. The sight of Christmas lights and snowflakes silently falling from the sky was breathtakingly beautiful. For 10 years they hadn't had so much snow in Seoul. After two weeks it was Christmas time and they were busy preparing for New Year shows. Sooyoung loved Christmas time, it was such an emotional and happy season. It was such a shame she didn't have much time to enjoy it.

She sipped from her hot drink and stared at the city. After three hours the other members would wake up. They had dance practise with Super Junior for their dance performance, Moves Like Jagger. Sooyoung herself was paired with Siwon. Thinking about the tallest Super Junior member made Sooyoung's cheeks turn red. Siwon was handsome and polite, yet knew how to have fun and make people laugh. He had covered many magazines and he was always everywhere. Dancing with him made her really happy. He was a good dancer and his movements were soft and flowing. She was happy to spend time with Super Junior members. Sighing she once again lost in her dreams, while sitting on the windowsill, watching the fall of infinite snowflakes covering the streets of Seoul...

 

 

"Sooyoung, wake up" Taeyeon's voice seemed to be thousand miles away. "Sooyoung, Sooyoung!" Groaning she opened her eyes, Taeyeon's worried face coming into sight. 

"You couldn't sleep again, could you?" their leader asked her. For a moment Sooyoung was really confused, before she realised she must have fallen asleep on the windowsill. Her body was sore and her head was hurting like hell, after all windowsill wasn't the best place to sleep in. 

"Morning unnie", she replied to the still worried leader. But Taeyeon wasn't distracted that easily: "Why didn't you wake me up if you couldn't sleep? What time did you come here? Oh Sooyoung this is already the second week in a row I find you have hardly slept at all!" 

"Unnie I did get some sleep, you just woke me up remember?" 

"Don't try to fool me I know you too well, I would say maximum two hours am I right? You wouldn't be here if you had slept more"

"Okay okay, I couldn't. And you're right, I dind't get more sleep than that. But it's better than none, right? Don't worry unnie, I'm fine" 

"You don't look like it, is there something bothering you because you can't sleep?"

Sooyoung sighed getting up from the windowsill. "No unnie, there's nothing bothering me. I don't know why can't I sleep, but I'm fine, really!" Taeyeon pouted but let the issue drop. 

"We have one hour before manager oppa comes to pick us for the studio. We'll practise all day with Super Junior members and after that some of us have invidual schedules." 

Sooyoung went to bathroom to get some medicine for her throbbing head. She took a quick shower, which always made her even a little more awake. She decided to put on some makeup as well, because she had to admit Taeyeon was right. She didn't look like she was okay. There were huge black circles under her eyes and her skin seemed a little greyish. The happy glint in her eyes was replaced with dull shimmer. Wearing blue jeans and a white t-shirt she was ready to go.