a/n: I am so sorry I couldn't update this, but my computer is literally living off of one wire. The screen isn't even attached to the keyboard anymore and now it's starting to shut down randomly and won't come back on until a few days. All my files are saved on it and I am currently using my school laptop to go on this site, and that's not even a good idea. So on the lucky days when I can actually stay on my personal laptop for a few minutes, I'll try my best to restore the files and update. I hope you guys understand and thank you for being so patient with me!

Kyungsoo was breathless by the time the two were a good distance away from the ill-mannered, drunk man. The fear that crept into him had slowly faded into a faraway emotion, hidden by the protection of Jongin.

Their steps slowly came into a halt, Kyungsoo’s face distorting in panic from the sudden action. Did I do something wrong? He began to question but the look Jongin sent him didn’t seem to appear worried. So instead of panicking, Kyungsoo let the comfort of warmth and safety engulf him into harmless territory.

Jongin turned, now facing Kyungsoo who widened his eyes in an embarrassed manner. He hadn’t realized how close the two were, especially with fingers still interlaced on top of each other. 

“T-thank you,” Kyungsoo began, “for back there.” He gestured clumsily to the scene in which an attempted assault almost took place. Jongin shrugged, throwing their hands away at the air so that they weren’t touching one another. Kyungsoo was pushed away just as quickly.

Not entirely surprised with the personality change, Kyungsoo looked at Jongin with a deep stare, etching to talk about what just happened a few minutes ago. But just as he opened his mouth, the door of the club creaked open and out came Suho, along with other members trailing behind them.

Suho’s eyes were frantic, possibly searching for them. When his eyes landed on the two figures just a few feet away, he sighed in relief.

“What happened?” He questioned, analyzing their rough aura.

Kyungsoo and Jongin’s eyes came together, the smaller seeking answers as to what he should say. Jongin gave him an apathetic look. The heartless man inside of him scoffed nonchalantly at the rest. 

“Nothing. Are we leaving or-”

“I don’t think so, Jongin.” Suho pushed the younger backwards when he tried to slip by. He was stronger than he looked. The leader shook his head in disbelief at the scene.

“Tell me exactly what happened.”

“Don’t lie to us.” Kris suggested. 

Jongin bit his lip out of concern. Kyungsoo hadn’t want Jongin dragged into the situation, but it seemed it was his fault again.

“We saw you two leave. With another person, if I may add.” said Suho. The others nod their head in agreement. Jongin looked pathetic. It was him against the rest, and even Kyungsoo couldn’t defend himself.

It seemed it really was his fault.

“Someone must’ve mistaken me for someone else.” said Kyungsoo, mostly out of guilt from dragging Jongin into this messy situation. Jongin looked behind his shoulders, questioning Kyungsoo’s improvised theory. This was gone unnoticed though. Luck was on their side tonight.

Suho, and even Luhan, didn’t look too convinced. They furrowed their eyebrows, much like Kris.

“Jongin just w-worried…” Kyungsoo winced at his stuttering, knowing it could actually be a weakness in detecting lies. On top of this, he looked at Jongin’s blank face, expecting a scowl to appear. But when none did, he saw it as an approval and continued. “So he ran after me, but it turned out to be no one.”

“But we saw him drag you aw-”

“It was a dark club, Hyung.” Kyungsoo intercepted. “You must have saw wrong.”

Kyungsoo attempted to avoid eye contact, the thought of lying with a straight face being impossible.

Suho wasn’t too sure he believed Kyungsoo entirely, but it seemed the argument was pointless unless he was to consent defeat. So with no other choice, he led the group back home, with some only half as caring as to what had happened. 

Kyungsoo stayed silent through the trip, avoiding Jongin at all cost. Casually, he would sometimes sneak glances at the younger, in which he would catch him also staring back. He would blush before turning away.

Arriving at their dorm, most seemed satisfied with their first day off. Most, excluding Kyungsoo. 

Sitting on his bed, twiddling with his fingers, Kyungsoo’s attention rose as the door creaked open. Jongin strode in, a dark cloud seeming to hover over him. Kyungsoo curiously wonders why the younger was gloomy. Was it because of the incident earlier? It was highly likely, but he didn’t want to press the issue further. 

Without a word, Jongin hastily grabbed for a towel, only glancing for a second at the other before making his way out the room. Kyungsoo was half-expectant on believing the younger would approach him, concerning him about the incident. But the other half knew he was more likely to get ignored.

Leaning on the fluff of his pillow, he lets his mind wander into deep thoughts, past memories, and hurtful remembrances. He hadn’t meant it, but the thought of uselessness invaded his mind until his heart was twisting. 

Memoirs of his past before becoming a trainee haunted him. The sensation from back then were now being felt, possibly caused by a certain roommate.

People from the past had hurt him very much. Important people in fact, people he thought he could trust in. And with every word that escaped their mouths, he took them in like a baby learning to speak for the first time. The people he once relied on had now ruined his self-esteem.

Now, the feelings were reemerging.

With the incident that happened earlier, he felt like he was truly hopeless. Even with caring members like Luhan and Suho, they couldn’t console him enough with pity. 

His life was meaningless.

Too deep in emotions, he hadn’t heard the door open and the skidded footsteps that stopped at his bed. Eyes wavering, he lifted his heard and met eyes with Luhan.

“Hi Kyungsoo.”

Kyungsoo cocked a wondering eyebrow. “Hi?”

Luhan beamed a smile before plopping on his bed. He grabbed Kyungsoo’s hand, not noticing the flinch from Kyungsoo, and his thin fingers.

“I’m sorry I ditched you earlier. I didn’t mean to but I was scared and Sehun was just there so I let him take me away from you.” Luhan apologized. He shifted his legs so that his was sitting on his calves. 

Kyungsoo shook his head, shuddering when Luhan had gotten closer to him. “It’s ok, Hyung.” 

“No it’s not.” Luhan pouted. “I shouldn’t have left you no matter what. You could have been abducted! Or !”

.

Kyungsoo winced when Luhan shouted that. I could’ve been .

“I just feel so bad about it. I swear Kyungsoo, I’m the worst person ever-”

“No you’re not!” Kyungsoo jerked away, stunning Luhan who looked skeptical from Kyungsoo’s sudden shouting.

“What?” He asked.

Kyungsoo sighed. “You’re a great person, Luhan. You always take care of everyone, whether they know it or not. You make people happy and your presence is always wanted.” Kyungsoo turned the other way in shame. “You’re everything people always wanted.”

Luhan was astonished at Kyungsoo’s statement. He shook his head out of grief and smiled at the younger. “Thank you, Kyungsoo, but I’m not here to talk about me. I want to talk about you and how-”

Before he could finish, Jongin walked in and stared at the two figures with no readable expression. Luhan looked at him with confusion, then stood up. “I’ll talk to you later, Kyungie.” He said and left, leaving Kyungsoo in a wet Jongin’s presence.

Kyungsoo was not grateful for Luhan’s leaving.

Jongin had sweatpants hanging low on his waist, no shirt on. Kyungsoo blushed and directed his gaze elsewhere.

“Did you tell him what happened?”

Kyungsoo bit his lips and eyed Jongin’s moving frame in the corner of his blurry vision. He shook his head reluctantly, feeling as if he was forced to. 

“Good,” said Jongin. “I don’t think it’s a good idea to be telling everyone.” 

Fingers curling, mouth twitching, Kyungsoo felt his heart burn from the ache of Jongin’s suggestion. Did Jongin truly not care? 

“Even if anyone does believe you, nothing can change what happened. What’s done is done.”

Having nothing else to say, Jongin left the room soon after, a loneliness feeling left behind. 

With the heart to not proceed his day, Kyungsoo laid flat against the bed, pitying himself for being a useless human being whom no one cared about. 

His life was truly pitiful.

“I’ve prepared food!” Lay ringed in, the aroma of seasoned steak filling in most of the member’s nostrils, catching their attention. 

Half-heartedly, Kyungsoo dragged himself out of the room, stomach quivering from the lack of appropriate nutrients in his body. He hadn’t sense the hungriness that took place in his belly until now.

Surrounded at a small table, plates of food was being handed over to each members. Kyungsoo found himself sitting on a wooden chair with a plate of delicious dinner in his hand. He looked down, the seasoning perfecting the piece of meat with it’s flavor. 

Unwillingly, he gulped down his food and watched everyone chat with one another, including Jongin. The boy seemed in his own world, every now and then chatting with someone but that never lasted long. 

Eventually, Kyungsoo felt a heaviness in his lower belly, knowing all this fatty food would have to be rid in some way. He felt disgusted. The caloric meal was a lump in his stomach.

Heaving with difficulty, he scooted his chair away and stood gaining some of the boy’s attention. 

“Where are you going?” Suho asked. Kyungsoo gestured to the bathroom and walked off, but the leader was quick to hold onto his wrist. “But you barely ate?”

“I’m not that hungry, Hyung,” the lie, unexpectedly, came out smoothly.

“Yay, more food for me,” Chen exclaimed already reaching for the barely eaten plate. 

Kyungsoo took this as an acceptance from Suho and attempted to leave again, but was still held onto tightly. 

“Are you feeling ok?”

Kyungsoo hated the attention that was suddenly on him. He felt eyes bore themselves on his petite frame, most curious as to why he was suddenly acting up. 

“I’m fine, Hyung,” Kyungsoo harshly yanked his wrist away, though he grimaced from the pain that was left behind.

Suho was obviously shocked from the act. “Why are you acting like this, Soo?”

He didn’t bother to reply and instead scurried away, wanting to leave before anything else could be said. 

Scampering like a rabbit, he locked himself in the bathroom, hoping no one becomes suspicious of him. Kyungsoo had such a weak heart. His eyes were already brewing with tears, tears that had suddenly formed. He didn’t know why he was caught in emotions, becoming a sensitive girl.

His back hit the wall and he slid downward, knees meeting his forehead. He wrapped his fragile arms around his knees and cried into them. There was a knock at the door but he didn’t respond and eventually, the person left.

Kyungsoo whimpered for minutes before a sudden thought came into his mind. There was still food in his system. A toilet a few feet away from him.

Looking around guiltily, he crawled to the toilet bowl and lowered his head.

***

The atmosphere became silent after Kyungsoo left. There were a few gulps from drinks and clinks from spoons, but that was about it. Suho was still shocked from the younger’s rudeness of leaving.

He was about the get up but Luhan was quick to push him down. 

“I’ll go talk to him.”

Suho was going to protest but Luhan had already left. 

No one else spoke about it to Suho after that. They all continued to eat calmly and Luhan never returned. Gradually, members left the kitchen as they finished their food. Eventually, it was only Sehun and Chanyeol left.

Chanyeol was a big eater so he still had lots on his plate. Sehun, on the other hand, had another objective in mind. One he couldn’t do on his own.

So with a blush, Sehun scooted closer to Chanyeol, who was oblivious to the maknae’s intentions. 

“Hyung, I need some advice.”

Obviously Chanyeol hadn’t expected that, judging from the globs of food that had been coughed back up. Sehun gave him the stink eye and he already regretted asking the fool, but he was the only other one in the band that could actually give experienced advice.

Chanyeol was sporting a grin after cleaning himself up. He was already excited as to why the maknae would come to him for advice and not the other Hyungs.

“Ah, what does little Sehunnie want?” The taller grinned ear to ear, face enthusiastically happy. Sehun was blushing and this caused the older to pinch his cheeks with his fingers. They were immediately swatted away from the fiery maknae. 

“Shut up. I’m only asking you because you have experience…”

“Experience? Like what?”

“You mean like love?” Tao’s appearance made the two jump in surprise, not knowing that the Chinese male was eavesdropping the whole time. 

“What the hell Tao?!” Sehun exclaimed. 

Tao rolled his eyes and hopped on a stool nearby. “Oh you’re such an amateur. Coming to Chanyeol, of all people, for advice about love.”

Sehun blushed a deep red.

Chanyeol, being a little slow, piped up once he knew where this conversation was leading to. “Oh! That’s what you mean Sehun?”

“Of course that’s what he means!” Tao waved his arms dramatically. “It’s so obvious. The way you stare at him. The way you always laugh and smile when he’s around.”

Chanyeol, again a little slow, frowned, “wait… who’s ‘him’?”

“Luhan of course,” Tao screamed, maybe out of frustration. “Sehun is in love with Luhan!”

Shrieking, Sehun dove towards the Chinese boy and held his mouth shut, hitting him in the head also. “Shut up will ‘ya!”

Tao continued to muffle within Sehun’s grasp while Chanyeol scratched his head out of confusion. As if finding a solution, he held up a hand and said, “Oh! Is that why you’re always so cheesy around Luhan Hyung?”

Sehun, tongue-tied with embarrassment, stepped back before shoving a hand down Chanyeol’s throat. “I am not cheesy around him!”

Tao, like the sassy women he is, jumped off the stool and pulled the fighting maknae away from Chanyeol. “Ok, first of all, what’s the big deal about wanting to keep this a secret. Practically everyone knows. Second, you are cheesy around him.”

“I am not! And not everyone knows! Luhan Hyung doesn’t know,” Sehun pouted, fingers twiddling together like a child.

Tao found amusement at the maknae’s melting demeanor this night. The boy was head-over-heals for Luhan, too bad the elder was oblivious to this fact.

Sighing upsettingly, Sehun frowned. “He doesn’t even suspect anything.”

“Well that’s what you get for liking someone so dumbheaded.” Chanyeol stated, earning a kick from Sehun.

“He is not!” Sehun defended. “Is that even a word?”

“I’d say that’s more like you,” Tao pointed to Chanyeol, “but onto more important stuff, Sehun! You need to confess to him!”

“I don’t think he likes me though.”

Tao groaned at the negative response. “You never know until you try.”

Sehun contemplated this for awhile. Tao was already rooting for him but if he did confess to Luhan, would he accept? What if he got rejected. Sehun doesn’t think he could handle that.