As always, please forgive me for any mistakes cause I really know my english not good T__T
Thank you so much to everyone who's left lovely comments, peeked, Viewed, subscribed. Sorry to make you wait a long time ^ ^ This chapter is long enough and I hope it doesn't make you bored :( Enjoy!
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Today is our 7th wedding anniversary and that means I've been married with Seunghyun for 7 years. And like last year, he would try to make me a special breakfast. Yes, only breakfast without any gift. Actually, I often wished he would give me a special surprise or just a small box of chocolate, or maybe a flower but he never did it at all. When he proposed me, there was no ring or any object as a symbol of it. At that time we were in the stadium to watching the friendly match South Korea vs German. In the midst of the crowd shouted of it, he whispered "Ji, will you marry me?". At first I was shocked and silent, then he smiled and I said "yes" and 4 months later we were married. Our wedding was very simple but so beautiful. Seunghyun is not a romantic guy and I completely understand his character, he said romantic things like that only exist in the movies or novels.
That's my husband ...
Seunghyun ...
And I love him very much ...
I stood against the wall staring at him who was preparing breakfast for the both of us. He was still wearing his plain pajama pants and white t-shirt. Gaho, my dog was lying on the floor right near our dining table.
"Happy wedding anniversary baby ..." I said smiling. He turned and looked at me with his deathly gaze. Somehow though I've known him a long time and even now we are married but my heart still always pounding every time he looked at me.
Every second I'll always be in love with you Seunghyun ...
"Good morning baby" he replied. I walked over and put my arms around his neck, he held me tightly. He kissed my lips gently. I bit his lower lip. He chuckled then kissed my cheeks and my left ear.
"I love you Ji" he whispered softly in my ear. His whisper words made my heart beat fast.
"I love you more Hyunie" I kissed his chin. His lips began to dancing into my neck and then he my collar bone.
"Hyunie ..., I have a meeting with Seungho this morning ..." I said. He took a breath and I looked the disappointment on his face.
"Seungho..., Seungho..., again ..., you don’t need a partner Ji ..., I'm sure you're quite capable to developing your own brand" He removed his hand from my waist and stepped to the refrigerator.
Seungho is my business partner. We met at a fashion show and we are going to make a new brand together and try to expand our business. Moreover, Seungho had many relations in the Korean entertainment and he really likes my design. And of course I think this is a great opportunity for me. Seunghyun didn’t disagree with my plan, he just felt that Seungho had other intentions towards me and I think he is jealous with Seungho.
" Baby..., we've been talking about this before ... please..., I need your support" I bite my lip.
He came over me, his hands carrying a box of eggs and put it next to the stove.
"I got your back and you know it" he kissed my forehead.
"Thank you. Ehm ... I'd better do this. " I took the pan out of his hand. He laughed.
"Finally! I saved " he said.
"This is your seventh years but you could never make a sunny side up. You never succeed and made ​​my kitchen mess" I shook my head. He laughed again.
"I'm just trying to be romantic for you ...., anyway your sunny side up is the best in the world!" he pinched my .
"Yaaa!! Idiot!" I yelled.
"I love you Kwon Jiyong. You are my sun..., my moon... and my star. You're like a red rose.." he seduced me and stepping towards the dining table.
"Shut up! " I protested. He laughed out loud.


 

I look out my office window. Seungho approached me.
"You like this place?" he asked. I nodded. We just moved to a larger building since we started to work together.
"It's not too far from your apartment, right? I guess that's the reason why you chose this place huh?" I glared at him. He laughed.
"At least, if you have overtime ..., it might be easier for you if you stay at my place" he looked at me. I laughed.
"I love my husband Seungho" I showed him my wedding ring. He shrugged his shoulders.
" Okay, okay ... I know ..., but somehow he never likes me. Your husband is so weird!" Seungho grinned.
Seunghyun always jealous with you ...
"Shut up!" I smacked his head.
Yes, Seunghyun doesn’t like Seungho. He always feels that I’m too close with Seungho and it made him jealous. Seungho is actually a good friend, he is smart and funny. I like to discuss many things with him and I can assure our relationship now is only for work and friendship. Not more than that, at least from my side.
"You want to have lunch with me?" He asked embracing me.
"All right, you treat me okay? “ I laughed.
"If you give me a kiss" he teased.
"Yaaa!" I poked his belly with my left elbow. He scowled. We walked toward the door, until my phone rang and Seunghyun was calling me.
Seungho glared at me. I smiled and picked up the phone.
"Hello baby .." I said. Seungho sighed and left me for while.
"Ji ..., Minzy had just given birth. Now I'm in the hospital with Daesung. I can’t pick you up, when you're done you can come here, okay?" Seunghyun said.
"Okay. And the baby? " I said.
"A boy.., and he’s so cute." Seunghyun giggled. He looked very happy.
"How about Minzy? " I asked again.
"She's fine. I’ve to go. I’ll call you again. Bye baby!" he hung up.
Minzy is Daesung's wife. And Daesung is Seunghyun’s best friend and his co-worker. They founded the architectural firm together.


After having lunch with Seungho at the chinese restaurant and took care of some things with him, I asked him for taking me to the hospital.
When I arrived at the hospital, it was already night. I went to the room where was Minzy was in care. I could hear some people talking inside. I opened the door. They all were looking at me.
"Hi!" they greeted me. In the room, there were Daesung, Minzy, my best friend Youngbae and his wife Chaerin and their son, Yong-jo who was playing with the twin, Eun Sun and Eun Jung, they are Daesung and Minzy daughters.
"Hi guys!" I said smiling. I was handed a parcel of fruit and balloons to Daesung. I approached to Minzy and gave her a congratulatory hug. I saw Seunghyun who was carrying the baby. Seunghyun looked very happy. I bit my lip. It should be a happiness, but not for me. Seeing my husband liked that actually made my heart hurt.
I know ...
Seunghyun ..., of course you’re hoping he is your own son, right?
Youngbae looked at me. But I just grinned.
Seunghyun came over me and showing the baby. He is very handsome. He has Daesung’s small eyes but he looks like Minzy.
"He's so cute isn’t he?" Seunghyun looked at me. I wondered what was on his mind.
"Yes." I said softly. Somehow my chest felt so tight.
Ji ..., calm down yourself ...
Don’t cry ..., you’re so strong Jiyong!!
I looked away and I looked at Yong-jo and the twins. But it was so wrong. Looking at them just made me blue.
Have I started to hate the children?
Oh my God ...
I also want to have a child ...
"Ji ..., how’s your new brand?" Youngbae asked. I thought he understood my feelings and trying to distract me.
"It’s perfect" I replied. Seunghyun gave the baby to his mother.
Seunghyun pulled my hand and walked toward the chair right next to Youngbae. Seunghyun holding my hips and I sat on his lap. He kissed my shoulder.
"Aah! Today is your wedding anniversary, right?" Daesung said sitting on the bed next to Minzy, while his wife was busy with their baby.
I looked at Seunghyun, he smiled and grabbed my hand.
"Congratulations!" They congratulated us.
" seven years, huh?." Chaerin said.
Yes, you are right ...
"Jiyong Oppa ..., it's time for you both should be busy with children." Minzy said.
Please ...
Don’t talk about it anymore ...
I took a breath and tried to smile. I tried to adjust my emotions. It's been 5 years, everyone asked me about having children, even Seunghyun and my parents. And I really hate this.
Of course I want to ...
Specially Seunghyun ...
"I know ..." My voice was heavy. Seunghyun hugged me. But he was silent.
"Maybe you can adopt ..." Daesung said smiling.
Enough !
I always hate this situation ...
"But we can’t just adopt ... at least, we should know..." Youngbae said. I think he was trying to defend me.
Seunghyun ...
Why didn’t you say anything ??
I don’t like this!!
"Sorry .., I’ve to go to the rest room.." I got up from Seunghyun's lap. I can’t stand anymore, my chest was getting crowded. And my eyes felt sore. I was afraid I was not quite able to hold it.
They all looked at me.
"We have to go. It’s time for a candle light dinner" Seunghyun laughed. I frowned. They all laughed.
What is he trying to do?
"Seunghyun ..." I said. He smiled.
"Let's go out of here" he whispered and kissed my cheek.


 

" Do you mind if we pass our dinner? I want to go home ... "I looked at Seunghyun who was driving
"Are you sick baby? "He touched my forehead with his right hand.
"Just a little dizzy.."I said softly. I leaned my head on the seat and looked out the window. He my head.
Seunghyun had always wanted to adopt a child but I always refused it, not because I hate the children, it was just that I wanted us to have our own biological children.
Stupid?
Doesn’t make sense?
Yes, I knew it and I realized that ...
 

Maybe I am stubborn or maybe I am stupid, but it does what I want. I just wish we had a child who is a child of our own. Of course it would be more amazing is not it? But the fate would not let me, I'm not a woman and I don’t have a uterus.
Indeed Seunghyun may understand this, although he didn’t say much. For that he has always suggested that we adopt a child. But I'm not ready for it, I think it would be weird if I care for and raise a child that is not mine or his.
If only I were a woman!
God!
 

I still doubt myself, if I'm able to be a parent? Can we be good parents in the future? Many things I've ever heard that having a child is not easy and a bit of a hassle. And a lot of things we had to do and take care.
I know, Seunghyun is very jealous with Daesung and Youngbae or with other his