It's 2014.

The year I've been waiting for to start a new life, without loving him. Without hating him either. I want to live my life freely. No more sad moments thinking about the past with him. No more heartbeats when I see him. No more attempts to get new boys so I can forget him.

At first, it was so hard letting go and moving on. Whenever we were in the same place, I kept looking at and for him. But then, I looked away everytime he looked back at me. Nothing had changed, we were still the awkward duo ever. And no, no conversation between us, at all.  We were just doing our work, I'm dancing and he's being hallyu star. I'm not a fan, but still.......my heart was beating so hard and my mind went blank when I saw him on tv or in person.

But, one day. I was dance performing and he sat in front of the stage. At the moment, I looked at him, and he looked at me at the same time. But I didn't feel anything. No heartbeating and no blank mind. I was really happy back then, I thought my letting-go ways had worked. I just had to go with the flow. I didn't force my eyes not to look at him, and I didn't force my heart to stop beating so hard when I saw him. That's it. And somehow, it worked. My heart felt free, really.

Since then, my heart felt free, but the awkwardness between us still existed. Until one night. His girlfriend was taking me and my team to eat, and unfortunately, he was there. But luckily, we didn't eat on the same table. When we were about to parting, i bowed and he smiled to me. Directly. It was short, but lingered on my mind for a while. Then few days later, I was waiting in the backstage before performing. I saw someone coming from the far, and i knew exactly it was him.

'What should I do? Should I greet him? Or smile at him? But what if we're still awkward? But he smiled at me at that time! Eotteokhaeee'

I was busy with my mind if I should do something, when I saw he was getting near. As he arrived at the backstage door, I looked at him. Looking awkward. But he erased the awkwardness away. HE. SMILED. TO ME. With a hint of playfulness. I hurriedly smiled back. But then my mind went blank again. Fortunately, he already walked away so he couldn't see my blank expression.

I still remember that smile of him. It never changes, back then we were still kids, now, and in the future. It still makes me feel warm. And it will remain in my heart and my memories of him.

Thank you for the smile, after years of awkwardness, Lee Byunghun.

Well, do you know some words that said 'first love never dies' ? I believe in those words, because it's true. I won't ever forget the first time my heart beat because of a boy who said "happy birthday" to me in a not enough space between us. And if i want to forget it, I just can't.

So, the answer is, NO.

My first love has not gone. And it will never. Because I will always keep it at the corner of my heart.

But, do you know these words, 'true love never ends' ? I don't know much about this, if it's true or not. Because me too, I haven't found it. Maybe I just have to wait for it. It will come in a matter of time, right? Of course, that true love is going to be the person who loves me. And the man whom I can be comfortable with. That will make my waiting for him worth it.

So, dear my true love, whoever and wherever you are, I will wait for you.

THIS CHAPTER MARKS THE END OF THIS STORY:) THANK YOU FOR ALL THOSE READERS AND SUBSCRIBERS WHO HAVE BEEN WAITING. SORRY FOR THAT. AND SORRY FOR NOT MAKING THE END AS PROMISED, THAT I WILL MAKE IT HAPPY ENDING. WELL, I GUESS IT'S A HAPPEN ENDING? KKK. SO, IT'S A GOODBYE FOR US:(( LET'S MEET AGAIN SOMEDAYYYYY! AND HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE~:D