“Well?” Jiyong and Seungri scooted closer to me. I laughed and looked down.

“Well what?” I asked, playing oblivious.

Seungri scoffed and Jiyong scowled. “What happened next?” they asked me at the same time.

I acted like I suddenly understood. I giggled, feeling elated at what had happened between Daesung and me last night. “Then he kissed me.” I blushed and ducked my head, laughing.

They both looked so excited. Seungri even got up and jumped up and down.

We were all sitting at my kitchen table, eating small bowls of ice cream. How these boys loved their ice cream. Appa walked in and kissed me on the head.

“What’s all this noise about, Soo Yun ah?” he mused, starting himself a pot of coffee.

“She and Daesung are dating now~!” Seungri sang in his cute soft voice.

Appa whirled around. “You’re WHAT?!” He looked happy and concerned at the same time. More happy, though. He knew Daesung and knew that none of the guys would let anything happen.

Jiyong laughed. “Don’t scare her like that.”

Appa quit feigning concern and laughed. “Just kidding. Daesung even came to me first to ask if it was alright. Such a nice young man. You all are. I’m glad you guys are taking care of my Soo Yun. It was about to she became happy.” He hugged me tightly. “You’ve grown up too fast, my little angel.”

“Appa…” I whined with tears in my eyes. I hugged him back, just as tight.

He straightened and cleared his throat. “Where are the rest of the boys, anyway?” He asked, turning to pour his coffee. I smiled at him fondly. He was never very good at showing his affection.

“Aish, you know. They’re always taking care of business and practicing and whatnot,” Jiyong said. “I should be practicing, but I had to know what happened after we left yesterday.” He checked his watch.

Seungri puffed out his chest and said, “I’m already perfect. I don’t need anymore practice.” He was barely finished speaking when Jiyong smacked him on the back of the head. I giggled.

“Alright, boys, get out of here. I have to help Appa today and clean the house. Go, go, go!” I walked them out of the house.

“Soo Yun ah, come here and talk to your Appa for a minute,” dad called when I shut the door behind the boys.

I went into the living room and sat on the couch next to the chair that he was in. I leaned over and looked at him. He was wearing a plaid shirt with jeans, his glasses almost down his nose, looking up at me over his book. He looked serious, but loving.

He looked at me for a long time. “You look so much like your mother, Soo Yun.” Immediately, that brought tears to both of our eyes. “Are you happy, baby? Does Daesung make you happy?”

I smiled lovingly at my Appa. “Appa, I don’t think I could be more happy unless Eomma was here to share this time with us. I really don’t. But I worry for you, Appa. I worry for you all the time. I want you to be happy too.” Tears were streaming down my face now. I was trying to hold in my sobs. Appa meant the world to me.

He cleared his throat. “Seeing you happy makes me happy. Happier than you could ever know. And I know that your Eomma is looking down on you. I know because Daesung and the boys found you. Only your Eomma could’ve made that happen. She knew how long you’d suffered and she did what she could to make sure that you became happy. I hope you can feel that too, Soo Yun ah. You are my everything. You are my sunshine and my moonlight. I couldn’t imagine living life without you.” Tears were flowing down his face now, too. I’d only seen my father cry one other time.

I started sobbing and went to curl up in his lap. He held me. A twenty-year-old girl being coddled by her father. I didn’t care. I held onto my Appa tightly. I didn’t know what I’d do if something were to happen to him.

He rubbed my back gently. “It’s okay, Soo Yun ah.  You’ve been strong for so long. Let it out, okay? Then we’ll go on a little trip and give Daesung time to finish his business up. Okay?” He smiled at me lovingly. Like only a father can smile at his daughter. I smiled and nodded, sniffing and rubbing my nose.

Appa and I talked all the way across town. I didn’t know where he was taking me, but I didn’t particularly are. The drive was long and the weather was nice that day. Everything felt right. All was well in the world. Life was perfect. Eomma, I wish you were here, I thought lovingly. Thinking of her didn’t make me sad anymore. I knew she was always with me.

I looked over to my father, who had been quiet for a while now. He was smiling, looking like he didn’t have a care in the world. An image flashed in my mind of my Appa, walking me down the aisle on my wedding day. The thought made me smile so big it hurt.

“Soo Yun,” my father said my name urgently. I looked up right as we collided head on with a large truck.

Everything went in slow motion, just like the movies portrayed car crashes. We collided. We were thrown forward. The car flipped over onto its top. It was eerily quiet, though. I couldn’t hear anything. And I didn’t feel any pain. But I was in a panic.

“Appa!” I tried to yell, but it seemed like no sound came out. I turned my head—which now hurt—to look at my father. He was hanging limply from his seat, held to it by nothing but his seat belt. He groaned quietly.

“Soo Yun,” I barely heard from my appa. My Appa. He was hurt badly. I had to help him. I started to struggle against my own seat belt to get to him, but it was stuck. “Soo Yun, stop. I’m not going to make it.” People were surrounding us now. My whole body was aching and the sound was back. Oh, how my body hurt. But it was nothing compared to the pain in my heart. I felt like throwing up. “Soo Yun. I love you, baby. I’ll say hi to your Eomma for you.” He smiled softly and I watched the light leave his eyes. I opened my mouth… and screamed.