I woke up at the hospital, I was already in the ICU. Thank God I’m not yet dead. The nurse entered after a few seconds of waking up. It’s been a while since I was confined in the hospital. Where’s Nick? Maybe he found out about my disease and left me without a word? Or maybe he thought I’m not gonna wake up anymore. I wondered how long was I sleeping?

                “Good morning, Ms. Song. I’ll be getting some of your blood today, is that okay?” The nurse asked.

                I nodded weakly thinking if ever I have a choice? She injected a long syringe to my arm. I’m glad she got it correctly on the first try. Some of the nurses always repeat it. Until I get bruises. Oh well. It doesn’t hurt like the first time I was injected anymore. It’s just annoying when they are called nurse and yet they can’t inject it right at my fugging vein.

                After that, she changed my dextrose and fixed my oxygen. She offered me some crushed ice and so I ate. She was feeding me.

                “Do you wanna see your boyfriend?” She asked.

Wondering who my boyfriend was, I realized I didn’t have one. Maybe she’s talking about Nick? And so I explained “Hmm… he’s just my friend. Where is he, by the way?”

                “He said he’ll just buy some fruits for you and will come back after lunch. It’s 10am now, maybe he will be here at 1pm?” She answered.

                “How long have I been sleeping?” I asked again.

                “You were nearly operated, you know. But we can’t because you’re just a tourist. We need your family’s consent. You were unconscious for 4 days.”

4 DAYS?! SERIOUSLY!!! I MISSED HAVING MY BUCKET LIST CHECKED BECAUSE OF THIS STUPID LUNGS!

                “What happened to my lungs?” I asked.

                “Well, if you are wondering why your lungs had been feeling okay for how many days, it’s not getting any better. You were too exhausted that your lungs couldn’t handle your breathing. The tumor you have had gone larger because of the-” She expounded and I stopped paying attention.

                Like I’m always saying I don’t like to know what my body has. Especially these lungs. I really wanna go out now.

                “Ms. Song you really need to rest. And don’t try doing extreme.” She warned and left the room immediately.

                I rested again. I just woke up when I heard the door shut closed. I look at the door and saw Nick holding a basket of fruits. I smiled at him.

                “So sorry, rich lady.” He apologized.

                “How did you enter here? Strictly family members only, you know?” I wondered.

                “You don’t have family here in Italy, do you?”

                Absolutely none. Did he know about my cancer already? I hope not.

                “So… how are you feeling?” He asked.

                “Crap.” I answered.

                “You don’t look like you have a stage 3 cancer you know!” He complimented.

                I don’t know if I’d be flattered or insulted with that? I just asked “why?”

                “You’re too energetic! Hey, why didn’t you tell me about this?” He asked finally.

                “Because I don’t want you looking at me the way other people who knows about my cancer look at me. That look is the worst!” I responded. It’s true. I don’t need pity. Or sympathy. That won’t cure me!

                “Wow. Strong girl. Well, you got me wrong there. I’m not feeling that way? I did pity you when I heard the doctor say that you have that disease but later then I realized, why pity someone who has dreadful disease? They’ll die like we’re all gonna die someday. You get that?” Nick explained.

                “You were the first one to react like that, mister. That’s impressive!” I complimented.

                Instead of feeling down for myself and worry about what tomorrow brings, I’ll just take this time to have fun. And yes, we are all destined to die. Why pity those who are dying? They die earlier but you’ll die someday too. I love how Nick views this whole thing as a normal thing. The first ever person who thinks I’m normal!

                “Do I deserve a vanilla gelato for that?” He asked naughtily, poking my shoulder lightly.

                “Sure, when I feel better. And when I get out of this hell.” I giggled.

                I call the hospital hell because it’s the place I don’t wanna be in ever. It’s like a torture place. You get experimented, injected. Everyday someone dies here. If ever I’d die. I don’t want to die in a hospital. Coz it’s like dying in hell for me.

                Another day passed and finally I can go out and start my life again! They offered some meds again for me to take and inhale. Not for my tumor nor my cancer but it’s for breathing. Even before I already had asthma. They offered a cannula and a regular visit. I just bought it all and agreed even if I’m not interested at all.

                “Where do you want to go, miss?” asked the cool as ever Nick.

                “I wanna play paintball! Bucket list #19” I answered.

                “Crazy. Can we do that maybe after 2 weeks? You just got hospitalized. That activity requires a lot of energy. So let’s just eat.” He demanded.

                “You’re like my daddy. I miss him.” I said “fine then, bucket list #4! Eat all day.”

                “Wow, that’s fun! So which restaurant, madam?” He asked.

I don’t get it, why he calls me Miss, Madam, Rich Lady but I liked it. I’m treated like a princess or some royalties.

                “I want to try it all! Bring me to the food street! And let’s indulge ourselves!”

                “Alright!” He said offering the helmet.

                We rode his Ducati again. I was starving at the enormous fine dining I’m seeing! The foods were mouth-watering. The aroma of the Italian cuisines stirs up my spirit.

                “Nick, I don’t know. I don’t know where to eat first! This place is just so amazing!” I said.

                “Then let’s start here then. Let’s do it by sequence.” He offered. And so we did!

                Different main dishes, appetizers, desserts, side dishes, drinks! Everything! We tried the food we have never even heard of. And it all tasted good! The ambiance of each restaurant made us crave even more. Nick enjoyed eating those different gelato. I wanted to try it all. But it feels like the food I ate is already at my throat. I was so full!

                “Hey, Nichkhun! Are you-” I burped. I covered my mouth in embarrassment.

                There was awkward silence. We were staring at each other. In our family I can’t do that. My mom would get mad. I need to excuse myself, covered my mouth and then burp. Not talk and then burp. And then suddenly Nick laughed as hard as he could at me.

                “HEY!” I chide and then laughed hard too as I realize it’s normal to burp when you’re full. We were both laughing hard until everyone was staring at us. Maybe they were thinking we’ve gone crazy.

                “Let’s get out of here!” Nick said grabbing my hand, I nodded.

                We went out and tried some gelato stand out there. I was holding a peppermint chocolate gelato and a sansrival gelato. Nick has 4 gelato cones in his hand! All vanilla flavor!

                “You really love vanilla gelato, huh?” I asked.

                “This is one of the reasons why I stayed here after a ing incident.” He answered.

                What’s that ing incident he was telling? I did want to ask, but I thought, if he was interested to talk about it, he will. So I just smiled at him.

                “I CHALLENGE YOU! FASTEST GELATO EATER.” He yelled.

                “Sure!” I said.

                “4 gelato for me and 2 for you. That’s already your advantage! 3 2 1! GO!” He said.

We began eating it. My teeth is freezing. Brain freeze! And after a few minutes I lost. I laughed at Nick who was looking really dirty with all the vanilla ice cream all over his mouth.

                After a long all day indulging at different restaurants, we went home. I have not yet seen the apartment neat and tidy. It was surprising! It was indeed the opposite of the messy and stinky apartment! All was cleaned and fixed. The scent of the place is like a toddler’s room. Refreshing!

                “Wow.” Is the only word I said to describe my awe.

                “Nice right? I decided to fix everything before you arrive.” Nick explained

                “I remember I called someone who will clean it.” I cleared.

                He laughed and said “I messed up again for the past days you know. But last night I cleaned.”

                Ideal husband. Someone who knows how to clean. And do house chores.

I immediately walked into the single bed to rest when Nick stopped me.

                “Hey, where are you going?” Nick asked holding my elbow.

                “I’m going to sleep.”

Nick pointed the sofa and said “see that? You’ll sleep there. I don’t let anyone sleep on my bed. That’s mine.”

The words he just said got in my nerves, this stingy man! I am taking back what I just said. He is TOTALLY not an ideal husband. How could he?! Knowing that I’m a girl! And most especially, I HAVE CANCER. This guy has no gentleness in his whole being! He’s a bastard. Yes, I wanted to be treated “normally” but not like a trash. It’s normal to make me feel like a woman, right? Ugh. This is too much! But I’m never giving up. Maybe this is just another way of making me move out of his apartment, WHICH I WILL NEVER DO.

                I glared at him and proceed to the sofa. He gave me some pillows and after that he ran fast and jumped in his bed. As if trying to make me envy. I began fixing my “bed” which is actually the sofa. It’s not even long enough for my height. I have never tried sleeping in a sofa. Like, seriously? I have my own living room in my bedroom. I have 3 sofas larger than this ugly, tiny, uncomfortable sofa! I can’t even position myself. Finally, I lied in the sofa sideways.

                After a few minutes of turning around and around in the sofa. I noticed Nick still awake.

                “Hey, rich lady! Come here, sleep here now. I knew it you can’t sleep in a sofa.” Nick said teasingly.

                I did not answer. I wanted him to please me. A way of punishing him. And maybe he’s just making fun of me. Maybe if I excitedly go to his bed, he’ll start laughing at me and tease me again.

                “You don’t want?” Nick repeated.

                “No, actually it’s nice sleeping here.” I faked.

                “Okay, you rule.” He simply answered.

WHAT KIND OF MAN ARE YOU!!! I was screaming inside of me. I’ll only sleep here for tonight and I will buy a nice comfy bed tomorrow!! UGH!!!

                After a few minutes again… “Hey, you really wanna sleep there?” Nick asked.

                “YES! WILL YOU SLEEP NOW?!” I slightly shouted in irritation.

                “Come here already. Let’s switch places.” He offered again.

                “No thanks.” I said.

                “You picky girl.” He said and stood up and walked to me. “Go there now.”

                “I said I don’t want to. What’s your problem?”

                He removed my blanket and carried me.

                “Hey!” I said.

                “Stop calling me hey, I have a name.”

                I can see his biceps enlarged as he carried me. I held his shoulders, I might fall, you know. And his scent. I can smell his perfume in his neck. He gently placed me on top of his unmade bed and went to the sofa immediately. I decided not to say anything else. And sleep. But I can’t.

                “Uhm, Khun, Good night! And…” I stopped for seconds and “Thank you.”

                “Good night.” He said.

                KHUN? I CALLED HIM KHUN?!? OH MY GOSH!!!!

                Night after night passed. I began to get used to it. The bed, the surroundings. Everything is becoming usual to me. Days were simple. I got to know about Nichkhun. I got to work myself. We had a deal, alternate breakfast cooking. I don’t know how to cook, really. I never cook back in China, I always wanted to though. So I bought many cooking books and read it. I’ve never applied it. So this time, I’m really happy because I’m able to cook for myself and also for a friend. I think I’m doing pretty well. I mean, I’ve read cooking books for how many years now. I should probably be a professional cook by now. But well, reading and cooking is way different just like understanding and doing it are different.

                I cooked pancakes for today. With blueberries and nutella. I’m glad this looked pretty nice. I hope it tastes nice too.

                “Wow!” Nick looking all so excited to eat. “No vanilla gelato for this?”

                “None.” I answered.

                “You know what, Vic.” He said “The foods you are cooking are really not so good looking, but it taste well. I mean if you judge a food by its looks, you’ll surely not eat this. But it doesn’t matter for me. What matters is its taste.”

                “A food critique here.” I teased. I really appreciate someone who honestly says what he thinks of me or what I’m doing.

                “I can’t believe you don’t really cook. I mean, why does your mother hinder you from this?” Nick asked.

                “She’s not hindering me, I actually am a very busy person. I do piano lessons, dance lessons, photography workshop, flower arrangements, tennis, swimming, and many more.” I said “that was BEFORE I was diagnosed.”

                “Wow, pretty talented, huh.” He said “why not include cooking there?”

                “My mom cooks really well. But she never wanted us to really mess up our hands or anything. I don’t know. It’s my mom who chooses everything. My hobbies, I only loved photography and she agreed to it.” I explained.

                Even if my mom was like that, I really appreciate her. My parents worked really hard before I was born. They wanted to let us experience wealth and grant all our wishes. They didn’t want us to experience what they have experienced before. That’s why we were indulged in expensive things and rich living.

                “We are completely different, Miss! My mom never wanted me to stay at home and do nothing.” Nick said.

                I wanted him to elaborate it. I really want to know who I’m living with here in Rome. “Why?”

                “We are not rich like you. Not really poor, though. We were trained how to wash the dishes, wash our clothes, iron, swim, fishing, how to feed the cows and everything in the farm.” He said.

                “You’re a farm boy?” I asked.

                We have a farm actually. I like living in the province, the air is just so pure and fresh.

                “Not really. My grandpa has. We live in a city in Thailand. My mom is a half Chinese, you know!” He answered.         

                “Tell me more about how you grew up.” I said.

                “Well, I have 4 younger sisters and I’m the eldest. My dad is a mechanic while my mom is just a house wife. I was the one who was trained inside and outside of the house. I help my dad in his work and I also help my mom in the house chores.-”

                “No wonder you cook so well.” I complimented.

                “Thank you.” He smiled “my younger siblings were also thought how to do the chores and stuffs. I had some hobbies like swimming, traveling, playing the guitar, singing.-”

                “Singing? Wow, sing me a song then.”

                “-No. that was before. It’s different now. I’ll continue my story” I nodded “I learned those things because of my girlfriend. We loved music. And before I really got her ‘yes’ she had a checklist of her ideal man. Which contained ‘a guy who cooks, plays guitar, who loves kids’ which I did.”

                “And then?”

                “And then we broke up. The end.”

                “HEY! Finish your story, you monster!” I said. Why did they broke up?

                “We’ll go paintball today. Faster! Get ready. It’s about time.”

Oh yeah! It’s been 2 weeks already! I got all excited but then I wanted to really know about it. Maybe next time I thought. I get myself ready. Fun again! We went to the paintball arena. Amazing.

                “Vic, I’m worried-” I cut him off.

                “I’ll be fine. Let’s just enjoy, okay?” I assured him.

                “If you promise me that you won’t be hospitalized again.” He said. Like my dad again.

                “I promise!!” I pinky swear.

We were briefed about the rules inside. And how to use the gun. And the conditions. I was barely listening. The excitement is all over me.

                “Do you have any physical complications?” She asked.

                “Uhm… she has-” Nick uttered

                “Asthma, is that alright?” I asked.

                Nick looked at me and said “Yes, asthma.”

                “If it’s not advisable then you shouldn’t, miss.” She answered.

I shook my head as if there’s nothing wrong with my body. I was really nervous but I really want to try. Like if I die here, atleast I’ve tried.

                Nick pulled me closer and whispered “no running, raise your hand if you can’t breathe and don’t force yourself, you hear me?”

                “Yes.” I said softly.

                We are heading to the arena and the girl asked “Do you want to play it by yourselves only? Or do you want to join the group?”

                “Us only.” Nick said.

                And so we played. We hid, ran, covered, shoot, etc. it was totally amazing. Lungs were cooperative again. Every minute Nick is asking if I’m okay. He let me shoot him, we had a good fight. We laughed and chase after each other.

                We spent almost 2 hours in the arena, when our paintball ran off. I really had fun. I wanna do it again. This guy is really a fun guy. He’s a caring man. I don’t know why he sometimes try to be mean or something. Or why he’s so secretive.

                Nick went in front of me and wiped my face with a wet towel, taking off some paint. I was looking at his angelic face and muscular body as he gently wiped off the paint.

                “You are amazing.” Nick said.

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Author's Note:

So sorry to keep you waiting guys! I'm currently working on chapter 5 which is really long.... i'm telling you. haha! so guys, how's your week? let me share mine, we had swimming last April 30, that's why i havent logged in. sorry also for not further elaborating the paintball game, i've never tried that! that's why i dont know how to describe it. oh well. how did you find Nick in this chapter? hmm.. is Nick being serious with the last line? :"> tune in!

PS: Guys, im just what is "karma points" ??? is that something i should be bothered about? thank you for answering! LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS! xo