Scene 7: The Red Queen
Take 1 or Nothing at All
"Congratulations on your debut. I hear the drama is a period piece, set in Joseon?"
"I play the son of the military captain, a magistrate."
"You get to show off your martial arts skills! You will be very handsome I am sure. I will be jealous of all your adoring fans."
"YOU are the idol."
"But everyone loves handsome and charismatic actors." Silence. The wind picks up and there's a harsh chill in the air. "Kai, What happened to us?"
"You found someone better."
"That's not it. You closed your heart to me."
"Ha, you honestly think that?"
"You've always been so cold. It is so hard to enter your heart."
"You were there. I gave you my heart, but you were too busy with someone else to ever notice."
Another gust of wind blows towards us. It is almost unbearable. "You are better than him, you know? His looks has nothing on you."
"Stop saying those things."
"But it's true. You always will be my first and only."
"You can stop now."
"Kai. I love you. I always will."
"Did you already forget my real name?"
"Why does that matter!?"
"It matters."
"I've confessed to you that I love you! This isn't like those other confessions, I am not like them!"
"It's a shame really. You had one chance to take it and you didn't." Take 1 or nothing at all…
I walk away, closing the door behind me to avoid the cold wind.
--Present Time--
This I am sure of: I am falling for Byun Baekhyun. Now to only make him find the confidence to pursue me as I will pursue him. I have L on the side, looking to take him for his own and Taeyeon on the other fancying the angelic face and voice. I knew I went a little crazy due to the feelings of possessiveness I have over him. Perhaps being a little mad will give me an edge. I can win him, I can claim him for my own despite the environment that he will enter once he steps out of this house. Two others vying for his attention will only mean trouble for my pup. And I can't always be by his side when things get too colorful for my liking. Little did I know that L and Taeyeon were the least of my worries...at least for the time being.
I wait for Baekhyun by my car the following morning. He avoided me during dinner last night and during breakfast. I guess what I said to him made a deep impact. I will wait for him to approach me, I can't force myself on him, I can't mess this up. Looking at him in his school uniform and sitting next to me in class most of the day will be enough for right now. I smile at my thoughts and as soon as they escape me, I see the pretty boy with a bright smile and sparkling eyes. My heartbeat quickens.
"Good morning," he says sweetly.
"Good morning, pup." I open his door for him and move to the driver's side of my white Range Rover Sport. I will be practical today and not take my Acura NSX Roadster. I start the car and shift gears. I let go of the brake and drive towards the gate. Baekhyun coughs to get my attention.
"Hmm?"
"Aren't you forgetting something?" I look at him oddly. Does he want a morning kiss? A smirk forms on my lips. I guess this isn't at all one-sided. I lean towards him and our eyes lock. I can't believe this is happening, it is only Day 2 with Baekhyun. (I don't count the first night he arrived).
"Ya! Kim Jongin!! Are you leaving without me!!?" Sehun! I look at my mirror and see him running towards the car. I unlock the doors and let him in. "What happened?"
"Sorry, your brother distracted me." I want to wink but I remember I promised I wouldn't do that anymore. But then again, he never accepted the deal... I ponder at this and he notices.
"Kai?" I concentrate on my next task of the day: driving us to school.
We arrive and Sehun goes off to his class. Baekhyun is walking towards the classroom, this time I am a few steps behind him due to a group of fan girls congratulating me for my new drama with a card and mini-cupcakes nicely decorated. Right before I enter the classroom, Chanyeol grabs me and pulls me into the restroom locking the door. He checks the stalls to ensure no one is in their with us.
"What's the matter?"
"You still don't know?" Chanyeol looks at me with his eyes bugging out. I nod no. "Hyoyeon-noona will be the new dance instructor until the other one returns!"
"Why can't Lay be our instructor? He's the teacher assistant."
"Lay has to fill in for Minho during SHINee's Japanese concert in Shibuya."
". So she's here in the building?"
"Yup. And the faculty has lots of their teachers out due to a professional development seminar, so she will be filling in as a substitute during gym class today!"
"So I have to see her twice?"
"Jongin, what are you going to do? That girl is bananas. She is going to attack you!"
"Maybe she grew out of it. Two years of college should have changed her into a more calm, mature woman…don't you think?"
"Hell no." Chanyeol lets out a sigh, as do I. "I guess we'll just have to watch your back. It's not going to be enough if you watch it yourself. She can come from all sides, at all angles."
"This is terrible timing. Things have actually progressed with Baekhyun and I."
"Seriously? That fast? Daebak."
"Shut up. It isn't like that," I assure him. "It's just that, I think he knows how I feel."
"What do you mean, 'you think'?"
"I just know that it's mutual."
"Nice. Well, stay frosty [Marine term for concentrate]. If Hyoyeon finds out about Baekhyun," Chanyeol makes the sound and motion of sword slicing his neck. "Off with his head."
We enter the classroom and I see L sitting in my seat chatting with Baekhyun. Baekhyun has that same toothy grin on his face like the one he had yesterday when he was speaking to L. I move towards my desk, only to be stopped by Nana.
"Kai. How are you?"
"Great Nana. You?"
"Great too."
"OK." I move past her but she grabs my wrist.
"Kai-ssi." The class gets quiet and all eyes are on Nana who's hands are clutching my arm. Baekhyun is watching with L. "I like you." Oh no, a public confession. Baekhyun has a surprised look on his face. L starts to clap and stands up from MY seat next to MY Baekhyun.
"Good job, Nana. You are the first person who's ever publicly confessed to our Kai here." He slings his arms over my shoulders. I watch Baekhyun and his reaction to all this. People say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, and I witness Byun Baekhyun's eyes move from being surprised to feeling sadness to accepting defeat. This is not how I want all this to go. I pry Nana's hands off my arm. I shrug off L to make some distance between us. I smile at Nana and quietly tell her how I feel.
"Mianhae. I can't reciprocate your feelings."
She clutches on to me again and pleads, "give me a chance. I can make you like me if you give me a chance."
"Nana-ssi. It won't happen."
"Why? Why can't you try?"
Everyone is waiting for my response. I look at Baekhyun when I say it. "Because I like someone else, and it wouldn't be fair to my heart and their's." Byun Baekhyun I hope you know that I am talking about you. It will only be you that I will tie my heart to. I can feel Nana's fingers fall from my arms. She walks to the door then begins to sob and runs out of the classroom. The class remains silent for a moment then whispers are heard.
"She's brave to confess like that."
"Kai would never like her anyways, why did she even try?"
"I am so glad that Kai doesn't like her, now I have a chance."
"She should have just wrote her confession down and not say it out loud."
"Kai is so cool rejection such a pretty girl."
"That's enough," I commandingly say to the class. "Please, that's enough." They bow to me as I take my seat, next to Baekhyun of course who is still in a state of…
"Kai." He looks at me with sympathetic eyes. "Who is the person you-"
"Well well well. If it isn't the hottest boy in Seoul Arts, Kim Jongin." Baekhyun's words were cut off by the voice of the Red Queen herself.
"Hyoyeon."
"Kai, anyeong." She glides over to me. Baekhyun is looking at her and she looks back at him. "Aren't you a looker." She blows a kiss towards Baekhyun. Then she stands on the aisle between Baekhyun and me. "And you, my dancing machine, have gotten even more gorgeous after all these years." She places her hands flat on my desk and I lean back on my chair and fold my arms. She leans towards me and Baekhyun stands up quickly. He walks out the door. Where is he going?
I get up to follow him, but Hyoyeon blocks me. "Move."
"Uh-uh."
"Don't make me tell you twice." She moves to the side and as soon as I pass Chanyeol's desk he stands up and blocks her way so she doesn't follow me out the classroom.
"Noona, welcome back." Chanyeol speaks to her loudly and obnoxiously. Jongdae joins in.
"Yeah, this is so nice you are here to visit us." The two corner her and she can't escape.
"Move you two!"
"Noona, let's have a photo to commemorate this reunion." Jondae suggests.
"Fine. Hurry up." I hear her say. The guys stall her by repeatedly having to retake the photo.
I see Baekhyun outside on the balcony looking over the front entrance of the school. His shoulders are slumped as he leans on the railing. He must have thought there was something between Hyoyeon and I either that or maybe he is still too shocked about the Nana confession. I smile a little because at least I know he feels something for me. I am about to step into the balcony when I see L appear next to Baekhyun. Apparently the two were already out here, together. I wait by the entrance and listen to their conversation.
"You okay, Baekhyun?"
"Oh, yes, I am fine."
"You don't sound so believable. You want to talk about it?"
"No, it's nothing."
"Come on. Tell me. I am a good listener." And awfully chatty and persistent, Kim Myungsoo.
"I was just thinking about that confession Kai had from Nana."
"Yeah, he gets a lot of those." Like you don't either L?
"How often does he get those public confessions?"
"Well usually they just hand him a gift or a letter and that's somewhat a public confession. Often next to the school campus or at some sporting event or dance competition, Kai will receive a lot of public confessions from those that don't even go to our school. But something that Nana did was actually a little rare in our school."
"Oh. It took a lot of confidence to confess like that in front of the class."
"He's very well liked. Even I fell into his Kai-aura."
"You did?"
"Oh yeah, many of us did, some don't like to admit it. But it's difficult not to especially when you watch him dance."
"I've seen him dance, but it was brief. I'd like to see him dance."
"At the all school assembly next week, he is dancing. He's even more enigmatic actually. He rarely shows emotions, but when he dances, it's all there. And you can't help but fall and want to worship him, you know?"
"Ah. Well. That is…" Admit it Baekhyun, admit to L that you are attracted to me and not to him. "I don't really see him like that." Liar. Even so, that lie just pierced my heart.
"Hmm. Maybe you need to see him dance first." I can't tell if L is on my side or not.
"The shorter blonde noona that came in after Nana left, is she Kai's girlfriend?"
"No way. Hyoyeon-noona liked Kai for the longest time. But he never reciprocated."
"Oh." That's it. No other reaction? Aren't you excited that the man you love is, what did you say yesterday, y, free and single? This way you can have me for yourself.
"She's persistent though. Maybe he will finally give in." Damn you, L.
"You think he will, give in?"
"Kai is a mystery. He's never been in a relationship before for as long as I've known him, and that's a long time. Maybe Hyoyeon could break the single streak he's in."
"Oh." Again with that word…
"Now that I think about it. Hyoyeon may be his type."
"What is Kai's type?" You Byun Baekhyun, you.
"I would think a dancer like him. Someone cute and pretty. A guy as handsome as Kai should be with someone as gorgeous as he is, don't you think? That's sort of how the world works, ha."
Baekhyun breathes in deeply. He's cold. L removes his jacket and covers his shoulders with it. "Kenchana."
"You're shivering." He allows the jacket to remain over his shoulders. "So, speaking of types. What's your type Baekhyun?"
I had enough. I enter the balcony and grab L's jacket off of Baekhyun. The two look at me. "What's this?" I lift up his jacket. "This isn't yours, Baekhyun." I throw the jacket over the balcony and it drops on Minseok who is just now arriving school and startles him.
"Ya! What is this?" He removes the jacket and looks up at us. "Jongin-ah!"
"It's not mine. It's L's." I point over to L who is smiling at Minseok and apologizing.
"It wasn't me, it was Kai." He pushes me a little, knowing that I did it so he'd leave Baekhyun and retrieve his jacket below. He leans into me so only I can hear his last few words. "I am not giving up on him. You win this round."
As soon as L leaves, I stand behind Baekhyun and wrap my arms around his shoulders and lean on his back. He starts getting fidgety and nervous.
"What, what are you doing Kai?"
"Stand still. I am keeping you warm."
"We can just go inside."
"It's fine. Let's just stay like this for a few more seconds."
"Kai. We'll be late for first hour."
"We have 5 minutes. Stop fidgeting, pup." He finally stops and I lean my cheek on top of his soft hair. It feels so good on my skin, like silk. I want to grab his hands too, but I don't want to scare him.
"Kai, we should go in now," he exhales. I finally detach from him and I feel slightly empty. I already miss him. I already miss being so close to him and exchanging body heat. "Kai. About Hyoyeon."
"Don't worry pup, she doesn't mean anything to me." I leave the balcony first. I turn to look at him and he's still facing the parking lot, still standing on the balcony, perhaps lost in his own thoughts. "Pup?" No answer. "Do you not believe me?" He turns around, without saying a word, and passes by me. Silence is a scary sound, Baekhyun.
During class I sat in turmoil not knowing the thoughts that are filling up Baekhyun's mind after the two morning incidences and L's stupid conversation. I know it affected him. I thought after last night's talk he will open up to me, but these speed bumps keep getting in the way. Luckily Taeyeon is remaining stagnant right now, she hasn't made a move on my puppy. If she does, I plan to steal Baekhyun, runaway to Hawaii and live happily ever after. The End.
By lunch time, Baekhyun's mood seems to be picking up thanks to Chanyeol and Jongdae's silly conversations and Minseok and Kyungsoo delivering today's assortment of desserts. My puppy has a sweet tooth apparently. Baekhyun is sitting next to me, to his choosing, and I possessively lay my arm over his chair like yesterday. He doesn't seem to mind it. We start making conversation about liking DB5K and JYJ and who are favorite members are and favorite songs that they've sang as Tohoshinki. I chose Stand By U and he chose Doue. I wonder if that means something, like we are secretly saying something about the other person or about the relationship we have. Either way, it feels good knowing that things are getting back to normalcy. Day 2 normalcy that is.
Hyoyeon ruins the moment of course by appearing out of no where. The guys try to get her to leave to no avail and she sits right next to Baekhyun, at the end of the table. I pull Baekhyun's chair closer to me and he allows it. He stares at Hyoyeon, observing her. He bites his lip cutely and then purses them deep in thought as he analyzes his competition…at least that's what I think he's doing, or that is, hope he's doing.
"Anyways, as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted by Chanyeol here. The male model just flat out confessed to me that he wants to date me."
"I don't believe it," Jongdae quickly says.
"Ya, Jongdae! Do you think I am lying?" she huffs.
"Yeah I do."
"Ya!" She turns to me while I watch Baekhyun play with his phone. He puffs his mouth and then deflates it so adorably I am entranced. "Kai do something. Your friends are so mean to me."
"That is out of my hands." I continue to pretend to look at my phone when I am actually looking at Baekhyun who's looking at his phone.
"Kai!" She stands up behind Baekhyun and pulls his chair away from me so she can stand before me. I look up at her nonchalantly, then back at my phone. This time I actually punch my password in and begin playing Angry Birds. "Pay attention to me."
"What for?"
"Because we are made for each other and you know it," she flat out says. This gets Baekhyun to look up from his phone and then at me. The defeat is back in his eyes. Be stronger than that pup. Trust me not her.
"Shut up and go away. You can't order people to do your will."
She stomps her feet and leans close to me and I lean back to try to avoid her. "Just wait till dance class today. You are mine, Kim Jongin, mine!" She looks at Baekhyun who turns his attention from me to her. "Who are you?"
"Byun Baekhyun."
"Yeah, I know your name, but who are you?"
"Go away Hyoyeon. You'll infect him."
She laughs sarcastically at my remark. She turns back to Baekhyun. "I don't know who you are, but you better not be trying to steal my man."
"I am not your man. I never was or ever will be."
"Back off or else." She continues to tell Baekhyun.
Chanyeol makes the slicing noise for her and mouths, 'Off with your head.'
She stomps her way out the cafeteria and Baekhyun looks at me and exhales, disbelief on his face. He finally says something. "Being around you is just…"
"Just what?"
"Too much to handle," he laughs dryly, grabs his book bag and clears his lunch from the table. The Red Queen entered my life again causing Alice to rethink her situation. She is in a different Wonderland. Not the colorful one that she thought she was slowly adapting to, instead it is a sinister one with a Red Queen determined to shut her down and keep her away.
Gym class. Last class before dance class. Two back to back classes with her majesty. She blows the whistle directly behind Baekhyun causing him be startled while covering his ears. I was too late to protect him from it.
"We are playing badminton. There are four nets, get into groups to make up eight teams then begin playing."
Chanyeol, Jongdae, Baekhyun and I are in one team. L, Dongwoo, Woohyun and Hoya are in one team. Hyoyeon orders us to compete with one alternate so three versus three. Baekhyun says he will sit out first and we will rotate him in the game.
My team almost lost the first two games to Team Shortie because of Jongdae and Chanyeol. Jongdae kept hitting air every time. And Chanyeol is highly competitive, so he got too into the game and tried to win with one shot and hogging the birdie. This causes a lot of laugher. Luckily L's team had Woohyun and Dongwoo so they were just as awful. Woohyun was too busynthrowing hearts and flirting with the girl's team playing next to us while Dongwoo spent most of his time on the gym floor diving for birdies way out of bounds. During the final game, L is yelling at his team and we are waiting calmly for them to start.
"Baekhyun, anyeong." We all look a Hyoyeon who has her arms around him.
"That's harassment Miss H, I am reporting you," Jongdae exclaims.
"Shut up!" She takes Baekhyun to the bleachers close enough so I can listen to their conversation. "So, you just moved to Seoul I hear."
"I have."
"You live with Kai?"
"Yes, our parents are-"
"I know already. So what do you think of him?"
"He's nice."
She laughs, "no he isn't. What do you really think of him?"
"I feel like you are only wanting to hear a specific answer from me."
"I warned you already, don't you dare develop feelings for him, he and I belong together." I move towards them, wanting to stop the stupid and unnecessary conversation she is having with him. "I've seen what's under that uniform."
"Ya. What are you saying?" I grab her arm and slide her away from Baekhyun. Chanyeol and Jongdae joins us.
"I've seen what is under that uniform too," Chanyeol adds trying to help eliviate the tension she caused.
"Oh please." She leans on to my chest and I step back but she continues to lean on me grabbing my collar. "You will be mine by the end of this week, I will have what's underneath this uniform."
"Seriously, I am going to report you." Jongdae threatens.
Hyoyeon stands up and yells the dismissal of the class. We cover our ears due to the boom of her voice almost rupturing our ear drums. Chanyeol yells back at her, "You don't have to yell and get all angry. You need to work on that temper!" Hyoyeon glares at him and grabs Baekhyun dragging him to follow her. We run after her and she signals the gate officer who is taking his break by the gym entrance to stop us from pursuing her. She brings Baekhyun into the second floor office.
Chanyeol, Jongdae and I, still in our gym uniforms, try to listen by the balcony of the office. The window is open and we can hear everything and it ticks me off.
"I know who you are."
"Excuse me?"
"I know who you are to Kai."
"I don't understand what you are getting at or why I am here."
"Sit down. I need to tell you a story."
"I should leave."
"It is about Kai." There is silence and then she begins. "You aren't the first you know?"
"The first what?"
"The first person he's willing to open his heart to."
"So what is this story about?" Baekhyun says irritatingly.
"There was someone before you, it was Kai's freshman year at Seoul Arts, he gave this person his heart. But the person cheated on him."
"Oh no," Jongdae says worryingly. "She's going to reveal everything."
"His friends won't tell you the truth. They will encourage you to pursue Kai saying that you are perfect for him…and now that I look at you up close, you resemble a lot of this person Kai loves."
"How does this concern me?" Baekhyun is trying to be nonchalant.
"I can tell the way you react when he's around you that you fantasize about the 'what if' scenarios that you may experience with that handsome specimen."
"I don't, I don't know what you are getting at?"
"Here's the thing. He is looking for a replacement."
"A replacement?"
"For the love who he first gave his heart to. He will always love this person. He will never forget, and the only reason you two have a connection is because he misses his first love. Could you allow yourself to be with Kai knowing that he looks at you and thinks of another?"
"She needs to be stopped. This is all misconstrued. Her story is false, Baekhyun needs to know that." Jongdae again.
Baekhyun responds to Hyoyeon, "are you trying to threaten me? To keep me away from Kai?"
"Is that what I am doing?"
"Is that the kind of person you want people to know you as?"
"And what kind of a person is that, pretty boy?"
"A ."
"Woah. Baekhyun just called her a ." Chanyeol laughs at the surprise comeback.
"Your little pup has bite." Jongdae must have heard me call him pup.
"It is far better to be feared than loved." Hyoyeon arrogantly answers back to Baekhyun.
"She really is the Red Queen, that's straight out of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland story that Kyungsoo read out loud to us," Jongdae remembers.
"That's it. I have to put a stop to this. "Help me up."
"Huh?" Chanyeol looks at me like I am crazy. "You are going to scale this wall and enter the office?"
"Give me your hands, both of you, now."
"Are you mad?" I look at him fiercely. "Why yes your are." Jongdae clasps his hands together and I place my left foot on it. Chanyeol does the same supporting my right foot.
"Lift me up." Jongdae pushes me up only to lose his balance and fall on the ground, all my weight is on Chanyeol who is struggling carrying it all. I grab hold of the balcony railing and with Chanyeol's last effort of strength I am able to swing my leg over the railing. I jump over with ease and look down at my boys collapsed on the ground.
Chanyeol nods his head at me and says, "do you think you're Spider-Man!?" I salute my boys and they remain lying on the ground staring at me.
"He's definitely gone mad," Jongdae adds. Minseok arrives staring at both of them on the ground and then looks up at me as I give him a nod. He just shakes his head at our current antic.
I hear Hyoyeon through the open window. Baekhyun seems to look okay despite it all. "So that is why if I cannot have Kai for myself, then no one can, especially you." I hear Hyoyeon say. I enter the office surprising Baekhyun and Hyoyeon.
"Don't believe her lies. She is evil. Back down Red Queen."
"You are telling me that you still don't love that person!? You are just using this boy so you can finally get over your first love, when we all know you can't."
"If you say that, then why do you still pursue me?"
"Because I can be that person who will make you forget. Unless you don't want to forget…if so," she looks at Baekhyun devilishly, "then Baekhyun, you are really in a bad place."
I grab Baekhyun and lead him out of the room and far away from Hyoyeon. He removes his hands from mine and I follow him out of the building. I finally move in front of him and block his way. "What's wrong? Tell me how to fix it," I plead with him.
"Where do I even begin?" He says with a long exhale.
"Baekhyun, please…"
"Last night I truly believed that your shell isn't enough for me. That I want to know everything about you, like, what makes your heart beat-"
"It's you," I answer quickly.
He continues, "and what occupies your innermost thoughts-"
"Still you."
And continues, "and, I want to know your strengths and weaknesses, your flaws and imperfections…I want it all. I want the Kim Jongin uncut and raw. Hajiman…" He pauses, contemplating his thoughts. He stands, hesitant.
Don't walk away. Baekhyun, believe in us. Go beyond just my shell, go to a place where others have not bothered to enter. I know that I've thrown so many things at you in the two days that I've lived with you. In only two days time, you've encountered people and situations that are trying to keep you away from me. But continue to believe. Pup, I am going crazy over you and I can see that your mind is filled with some of that madness too. But a little madness is okay…because some say, to survive it, you need to be as mad as a hatter. Which, luckily, I am.*
*[Mad Hatter: "There is a place, like no place on earth. A land full of wonder, mystery, and danger. And some say, to survive it, you need to be as mad as a hatter. Which, luckily, I am."]
Baekhyun finally continues, "…all those confessions and relationships from your past…how do I compete?" Baekhyun is staring at me with moistened eyes and I can feel my heart pounding louder and louder.
"Don't think that way."
"This is impossible." Alice says to the Mad Hatter.
"Only if you believe it is." I say back to Baekhyun.**
**[Baekhyun and Kai's final two lines are from the dialogue between Alice and the Mad Hatter from Lewis Carroll's Alice's Adventures in Wonderland]
My first attempt at writing a love story about my two most favorite members of EXO, Kai and Baekhyun. Luhan, my other EXO bias appears as well :)
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