Yong Hwa crashed himself into his bed as he came inside the room after a long tiring day at school. His activities that day were not that hectic, but somehow he felt super exhausted. Not his physique. But his mind. And his heart.

He felt terrible the entire day. He kept thinking how his best friend was slipping away from him. Day by day, he saw Seo Hyun and Min Hyuk got closer, leaving him no room to spend time with her.

Nowadays, they never went to school together anymore. They never had lunch on the same table anymore. They never talked. They rarely said hello to each other, because she would be too busy spending time with Min Hyuk and their class mates on the school’s roof or at the cafeteria. And all those time, he would just stand and looked at her from a distance, feeling sad.

It wasn’t that Seo Hyun forgot about him. She initiated some random talks occasionally. But all those talks felt like nonsense because every time they started to get into the conversation, Min Hyuk would come out of nowhere then snatched her away from Yong Hwa.

That night, on his bed, Yong Hwa let out a deep sigh. He tried to close his eyes. He expected darkness, but all he saw was the sight of Seo Hyun and Min Hyuk riding on his bike together, every single morning. That made him sick.

He was hurt. Not merely because Min Hyuk had stolen the girl that Yong Hwa loved, but more because he felt like he was being left alone. They were always together for the past 11 years. They were the kind of pair that would always support each other, be there for each other, and console each other, in good times or bad times. Now a random guy had come into their life and made a mess of everything.

And this deep feelings for her only made things worse. He knew since the first time he realized that he felt differently towards Seo Hyun, their relationship would change. He just never expected that it became worse. He always thought that love would only make their relationship grew stronger. But apparently, he was wrong.

Now he missed his best friend very much.

If things were different at that time, Yong Hwa would just tiptoed himself out of his room and sneaked into Seo Hyun’s through her bed room window. But his conscience held him back.

He lied on his back, facing the ceiling as his mind wander around. Then he heard a click from his window. Before he knew it, Seo Hyun had already jumped inside his room with a peculiar expression on her face. He sat straight immediately. First, because he did not expect her to came in this late. Second, he was worried. Seo Hyun rarely had that kind of weird expression. So, something extraordinary must had happened.

“You came.” Yong Hwa said.

“You did not want me to come? I thought we sneaked into each other’s room all the time.” Seo Hyun responded.

“I know. I just…” Yong Hwa seemed lost in words, “You were busy with your friends nowadays. So, I thought that I won’t be expecting you come in here.” He looked away. He did not want her to know what his real thought is. And as Seo Hyun was a true believer of the concept “eyes are the windows to your heart’, he did not want to take a risk by looking into her eyes.

“You’re weird.” Seo Hyun let out her confusion, “Anyways, I came to tell you something.” She chose to sit on a bean bag chair near the window. “I know we haven’t got the chance to talk these days. I rarely see you at school. Maybe you were busy. Maybe I was busy, too. I don’t know. I just.. I really need to tell you this since you are my best friend and I don’t want you to know from anyone else but me.”

Yong Hwa felt something was really weird with Seo Hyun. She was always the kind of girl who says something to the point. But not this time.

“Just cut to the chase. What do you want to tell me?”

Seo Hyun looked at Yong Hwa in the eyes. She sighed, trying to find the courage to tell him the news.

“Min Hyuk and I date.”

There, she finally said it. And he heard it clearly. He wanted to tell himself that it was just a nightmare. But he knew for sure that it was real. He was angry and disappointed. But most of all, he was hurt. He should have known. He kinda saw it coming. But he never thought that it was actually happening.

Today, the thing that he feared the most had came true. He was left alone.

“Congratulations.” He told her without looking. He kept his gaze to the window where she came in, wishing that she would immediately disappear. He needed time on his own. He needed space from all this. He could not live in the world where his Seo Hyun is happy with someone else.

“You don’t look like you mean it. Aren’t you happy that I finally have a boyfriend?”

“Of course I’m happy for you.” Yong Hwa faked a smile, “Why wouldn’t I be? Finally, I know that you are actually into boys.” He chuckled. She did not know that behind that smile, pain was growing.

“Ah, cham! Now you can’t tease me about that anymore. Okay?”

“Arasso.. Arasso..”

Then Seo Hyun got up from her seat and moved to sit beside Yong. She leaned her head on his shoulder. From that closeness, he could clearly smell lavender, the smell of her shampoo. He loved that smell of hers. Suddenly, he felt the urge to caress her hair, letting her know that he, too, loved her. But instead, he said something totally different.

“Hyun-ah, you can’t do this anymore, now that you have a boyfriend.”

“I can’t do what?”

“You can’t sneak into my room through the window. You can’t lean your head on my shoulder like this, especially not in public. It’s not proper for a girl who has a boyfriend.”

“But we do this all the time.” She protested. Clearly, she did not understand the correlation between sneaking into another boy’s room in the middle of the night and having a boyfriend.

“Your boyfriend would not like it.” He felt his voice broken as he said that. It hurt too much.

“Do you not want to see me anymore? Do you want us to stop being best friends?”

“Of course not. That’s not what I meant.” Yong Hwa sighed. He tried to find the best explanation about what’s going to happen between their relationship now that she had a boyfriend, “You are still my best friend. And I am still yours. We just don’t sneak into each other’s room anymore. It’s not appropriate.”

“What if my mom scolded me? It’s not like I can go knocking on your house in the middle of the night just to see you.”

“You can always call. Call me, or call your boyfriend.”

“But that’s not the same.”

“I know.” Yong Hwa’s eyes drawn away, “But things changed. It won’t stay the same forever. All we can do is… adjusting.”

“I hope it won’t be like that with us. I know I have a boyfriend now. You have your own life, too. We may not spend that much time together anymore, but please don’t change. Don’t leave. You are the best thing that ever happened to me since I moved to Busan. I don’t know how to survive without you.”

“Hey, you said it like I’m going to die.” Yong Hwa let out a bit of laugh. “Don’t worry about it too much.”

“Promise me. Promise that you will never leave me alone. Whatever happens.” She looked at him in the eyes. With all the seriousness in her voice, he knew that he could not go back.

“I promise. I’m forever yours.”

They linked their pinkies to symbolize their promise to each other. If only Seo Hyun knew that Yong Hwa meant every word that he said just now.

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*The Death of All the Romance is a song performed by The Dears