~~Am I dead? If not, someone kill me please…

WHY?! I am so numb… I don’t want to live in this world.

After that hurtful scene with my brother, now I am sitting in a bench and listening to the news of my parent’s death?

WHY?!

“You know that I am currently working in the foreign affairs of our government, remember that 5 years ago, your parents went on a honeymoon trip to Hawaii right?”

“…Yes” --- my reply is so soft that I don’t think any sound came from me at all

“One time when they were wandering around… The taxi they were riding caught up in a traffic accident. Both of them died but since they didn’t bring any identification with them at that time, it took so long before they have been identified. After that, further procedures still occurred and it is only now that we are sure that the bodies really belong to them.”

I don’t want to listen anymore…

So much heartbreaks, am I a bad person? Why is fate punishing me like this?

Did I ever done something so hateful for these to happen to me…

I never thought that this world is so cruel. If only this pain can be cured with a band-aid.

The hollowness spread all over the body, engulfing my whole being.

I wish I am not here anymore…

I need someone to hold on, to support me, to comfort me…

And Usui-senpai held my cold hands with those warm hands of his.

He is giving me comfort without words. He was my hair and it felt good…soothing.

It seemed like strength is flowing from his body to mine.

He looked like my boyfriend.

I pushed the thought away. Senpai was just being kind. He just wanted to help and he was helping.

I felt better, simply absorbing his sympathy, his affection, his tenderness.

I leaned against him, letting him support my weight. Feeling secure. Cared for. Safe.

This is what is right… This is where I belong…

I don’t want any heartbreaks anymore and I know that senpai will protect me from that.

He embraced me and I didn’t avoided it.

I guess this is much better… I must move on…

He wiped my tears… And then… he was about to kiss me.

However, somebody grabbed my hand and we disappeared in the night.